chenwandak wrote:Hi everyone, I am a Taiwanese guy. And I hope you guys can understand my bad English.
First of all, I find
this article written by Winston is very accurate.
Taiwan is a one hell of social nightmare where young people are very cliquish, introverted and toward people they don't know cold.
From my personal experience, if you move to a new enviroment(Like from high school to universty) alone, then you have to suffer from one year or two years of loneliness until you are fortunate enough to join a clique. Because they usually like to stick with their own clique and refuse to meet new friend. And they will
look down on you and
see you as a loser if you ask them to let you join their clique directly. Like my current situation, I am now a graduate student, and I don't belong to any cliques in my current universty. I feel so lonely right now. Write an article like this is the only way to relief my misery. And I can't talk to anyone about this in real life. Because it will makes me sounds like a loser. And everybody will conclude that I don't have social skill.
Actually, I do have social skill. At least, I know how to interact with people. I know how to find topics during conversations. I have sense of humor. But, in Taiwan these skills seems not enough to meet new friends.
As for young women, like Winston mentioned in his article. They are very indirect. If she find you attractive, she won't show you
any messages. And try to avoid you when you approaching her. Someone may ask me:" If she don't show any messages, how do you know she find you attractive?" Well, because I'v noticed that she's staring at me and talk to her friends that I'm handsome when I am in distance. But when I try to approach her, she forms an ice barrier and turns her head away.And I'v been asked questions like this countless times: "You are very good looking. Why don't you get a girlfriend? ", "You used to studied too hard. Get a girlfriend and relax yourself.". Man, I really want to get laid. But how? My circle of friends don't have any girls. And none of my male friends can introduce me one(The most common way to meet upside-sex in Taiwan.).
But something I find ironic is that if you are a white guy, they
do approach you actively! When I was in my Junior year, I went to a conference with my professor and my classmates. There are a lot of white guys in that conference. And I saw a Taiwanese girl go pick-up those white guys and ask one of them to give her phone numbers. I mean...how can women behave like this? See their own men as inferior. That really makes me sick!
I have a shitty life now. Full of boring schoolworks. No social life. No girlfriend. And I have to pretend that I am very happy about my current situation. Because, if I don't people will think that I must have something wrong. This is absolutely not the life I want. I hate it!
After I finish my master degree, I want to go aboard. Get a sexy blond white chick. And nuke this f***ing island.
Welcome to the forum. We are your friends here and have been through similar experiences.
According to what you write, you are young, decent looking, have reasonable social skills, and are educated to boot. Well, don't fret. You have a lot to look forward to as far as dating is concerned.
First and foremost, don't write-off Taiwan yet. What you need to do is separate your work environment (in your case your uni) from your social field (where you approach girls and experiment with different methods and strategies). Best is you are in Taipei area cus its easiest area to be aggressive while remaining anonymous. Very important is that you be willing to break certain unwritten social rules this culture has programmed you with.
Meet up with me sometime to go out during day and visit some public places (bookstores, markets, MRT stations, malls, shops, other unis, etc.) and show you how easy it is to get a list of prospects who have no connection with your personal work/school circles. We could also hit clubs at night but those girls tend to be less suitable for longer term. Once you get a prospect list going, you can work it - over the phone, What's App, Facebook, etc. When additional opportunities present themselves (ie when you see gals you like out in public and number close them), you can add to the list.
If you have some sense about how to get dates with your prospects at the right stage, and bounce the girls back to your place when the iron is hot, you should be getting action within a month or two at the latest assuming you put in a few hours every week. I can get the ball rolling for you if we meet up at some point. I've done it with Winston a couple times down south.
Thing is, its not so hard to get numbers. But how receptive the girls are to you during the follow-up will depend both on her initial impression of you (A. not romantic prospect, B. neutral, C. mildly attracted, or D. strongly attracted) and your phone/chat skills. If she's an A, then you will prolly get nothing no matter how strong your follow-ups are If she's a B, it will be hard work but you may get her in time if she's single. With a C, you have a great chance to turn her into a romantic partner within days to weeks depending on how open she is, her relationship status, and the quality of your follow-up. With a D, you have a great chance of getting physical very quickly with her even if she has a bf. If you are as you say, and approach a few dozen girls, there should definitely be some Cs and Ds in the mix.
I don't have much experience going out with local or ABC guys. But I do have a great sense about Taiwan girls which comes from much firsthand trial-and-error experience. So I can probably be of some help to you even though your situation is different to that of a westerner.
And, if after doing everything I propose, you don't get anywhere within a few months, there's the whole rest of the world to consider. The hotspots for a guy like you (where you would likely enjoy the biggest handicap) include China and Thailand. But if you must have more western looking girls, consider certain parts of LatAm. I think decent looking or better pure white girls are extremely tough for NE Asian guys unless they are unusually handsome and/or masculine.
Hope you will follow-up with some solid action to change your situation.
jkjk
