White, older American males. What's in it for Filipinas?

[gratitude99]

Greetings,
I am new to Happier Abroad and find the commentary of this quite interesting.
Unfortunately I agree with the consensus of the tragedy that has befallen American Women. They lack the "earth energy" much more common among women of color from third world countries, a simpler ability to extend the magnificent nurturing of the feminine (and if one is fortunate, the goddess) that is fundamental support for the male energy.

Yet there are many complex questions. I have a doctoral degree and I am wondering how I could get along with a wonderful, "simple" Filipina woman who could be a great bearer of children, fill a house with love, and have nothing to converse about. If a women were educated, doesn't she have plenty of good choices with Filipino men. My biological age is early forties (waist size 33) and I am more fit than when I was a youngster. In calendar years I am 61 with a very full head of hair. What's in it for the gorgeous Filipina woman that I would like to find in her thirties so I can have a family in a loving context? Would it be just the possibility of wealth? Or do some Filipina women mysteriously find something attractive about older White males? To be honest, a lot of older American men to me seem crass and unattractive. I look at myself and see that, fortunately, I am still a candidate for women in that age range and all my partners in recent years(late thirties early forties) agree. But if I were to become seriously "crinkled" I would have a hard time expecting a flower of a woman to be romantically interested in me and I sure want that. Please give me your experiences.

PS - Just occurred to me I missed mentioning a critical issue that is discussed in some of the threads. That is, in the Philippines there seems to be a whole different way of feeling, being. Could it be just a greater awareness of the heart, and that the answer to my above query is that SOME older American men DO operate from the heart and make the younger Filipina women feel safe, honored, and protected. Could it be that???

[pete98146]

Greetings,
I am new to Happier Abroad and find the commentary of this quite interesting.
Unfortunately I agree with the consensus of the tragedy that has befallen American Women. They lack the "earth energy" much more common among women of color from third world countries, a simpler ability to extend the magnificent nurturing of the feminine (and if one is fortunate, the goddess) that is fundamental support for the male energy.

Yet there are many complex questions. I have a doctoral degree and I am wondering how I could get along with a wonderful, "simple" Filipina woman who could be a great bearer of children, fill a house with love, and have nothing to converse about. If a women were educated, doesn't she have plenty of good choices with Filipino men. My biological age is early forties (waist size 33) and I am more fit than when I was a youngster. In calendar years I am 61 with a very full head of hair. What's in it for the gorgeous Filipina woman that I would like to find in her thirties so I can have a family in a loving context? Would it be just the possibility of wealth? Or do some Filipina women mysteriously find something attractive about older White males? To be honest, a lot of older American men to me seem crass and unattractive. I look at myself and see that, fortunately, I am still a candidate for women in that age range and all my partners in recent years(late thirties early forties) agree. But if I were to become seriously "crinkled" I would have a hard time expecting a flower of a woman to be romantically interested in me and I sure want that. Please give me your experiences.

PS - Just occurred to me I missed mentioning a critical issue that is discussed in some of the threads. That is, in the Philippines there seems to be a whole different way of feeling, being. Could it be just a greater awareness of the heart, and that the answer to my above query is that SOME older American men DO operate from the heart and make the younger Filipina women feel safe, honored, and protected. Could it be that???

Welcome to Happier Abroad Gratitude! There are only a handfull of us that are actually married to filipinas on this forum so I'll take my shot at your question. Let's use my wife as an example. She grew up in a small town of Illigan City in northern Mindinao Island. For whatever reason, she and her two sisters always grew up knowing that they'd prefer to be married to a foreigner. Guess she never really ever considered dating a filipino man. Fast forward to the current date and you find that all three of the girls in my wife's family are in fact married to Americans (happily I might add).

But there are further reasoning that would motivate an above average young gal from the Philippines. I like to use Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs as IMHO, it explains behavior accurately. When my wife graduated with a biology degree, she moved to Cebu City in order to find work. Unable to find anything in her field of expertise, she sold industrial furniture to hotels, businesses, restaurants etc. She did well and was a natural salesperson. Her monthly salary was a whopping $300 US per month. With this, she and her sister lived in a small apartment with no kitchen and a shared toilet. Life is not easy in the Philippines even for those with a good head on her shoulder. Back to the Maslow example, natually she was seeking modest comfort, stability, pay and the ability to send some money back to her mom as her father had died of a heart attack.

So she was a prime example of a young pretty girl that wanted to go abroad, use her brains and give herself a better life. She didn't have any evil hidden agenda, wasn't solely looking for a green card etc. She was happy meeting an marrying a normal guy (I'm 19 years her elder) who would love her, give her a nice home and an opportunity to prosper.

She has a good job now and we send her family $200 per month (which doesn't break the bank). I'd say overall my wife is very happy and so am I. Consider myself lucky that I ever met her as she's been the best thing to ever happen to me.

[xiongmao]

Welcome to the forum!

I'm in China now, but some of the same rules apply.

The first is that Asian women find it much harder to marry as they age - their value in the dating market place must plummet by nearly 10% for every year over the age of 32. Older women can marry or remarry, but it's quite rare here. The hotter 30yo women on Chinese Love Links are very picky, but by 33 they're glad to date almost anyone.

The second is that the local guys are often jerks. Well certainly on my own dating site Vietnamese and Filipino men were usually the worst when it came to uploading childish content. No wonder Western men are seen as more sensible and mature.

The third is that there's a bit of white fever going on here - white skin is highly desirable in Asia. But even if you're not white, then being from the USA or Canada is also a big bonus.

Finally Western men are popular here as they're seen to be good husband material. They treat their wife well, and the older guys who come here tend to worship their exotic Asian wives.

By the way I'm also a PhD. I actually tend to prefer the housewife types. The majority of men are the same. A highly educated woman has no real value to me - it's looks and personality I value.

There are loads of educated, single women here in the economic powerhouse of Asia. If they wanted to marry Asian men, they would. If they wanted a younger guy, they would date younger guys.

[gratitude99]

Thanks Pete and Xiongmao,
You have both written genuine feelings and have good experiences. Great.
The next steps I need to pursue are to look to see what kinds of new thought communities might exist in the Philippines. That is, folks that value spiritual depth and interest in the evolution of consciousness. That is one of the good things that is easy to find in a place like S. California. However, I must say that it is easy to identify oneself with that movement and not necessarily live it.

The sense I get from reading some of the entries on this site is that there is somewhat of an unspoken caring for each other and for life in the average folks in the Philippines. Great if true.

I made a discovery of a way to extract quantum frequencies from living flowers that have an uplifting activity on human mind and spirit and are not like numbing anti-depressant drugs.

I have been speaking to an expat American who feels this type of product might be able to be introduced into the natural healing professionals in the Philippines. So I will be looking to find members of that community to get to know.

There are a great many wonderful flowers I would like to study on the islands, and hopefully find a flower of a lovely woman as well!!

More later

[Devil Dog]

Thanks Pete and Xiongmao,

I made a discovery of a way to extract quantum frequencies from living flowers that have an uplifting activity on human mind and spirit and are not like numbing anti-depressant drugs.

What the f***ing hell? You are going to fit in perfectly with this crowd.

[Winston]

Isn't the reason for them going for older white males all about money? Or is there more to it?

I'm sure the white males being more educated, more gentle and wiser compared to the average poor Filipino guy who looks barbaric and has nothing to live for, may be another factor as well.

The PI isn't a spiritual place by the Western standard of the word. But there is a harmony there that is lacking in Western cultures. The social vibe just feels smoother. In that sense you could call it spiritual.

[bkk_bro]

It's about security. The thoughts which plague women's lib get put on the back burner when basic needs are jeopardized, and those thoughts never have a chance to "infect" their hosts. A balance between a poor country such as PH and (insert western country here) would be ideal.

[OutWest]

Welcome to the forum!

I'm in China now, but some of the same rules apply.

The first is that Asian women find it much harder to marry as they age - their value in the dating market place must plummet by nearly 10% for every year over the age of 32. Older women can marry or remarry, but it's quite rare here. The hotter 30yo women on Chinese Love Links are very picky, but by 33 they're glad to date almost anyone.

The second is that the local guys are often jerks. Well certainly on my own dating site Vietnamese and Filipino men were usually the worst when it came to uploading childish content. No wonder Western men are seen as more sensible and mature.

The third is that there's a bit of white fever going on here - white skin is highly desirable in Asia. But even if you're not white, then being from the USA or Canada is also a big bonus.

Finally Western men are popular here as they're seen to be good husband material. They treat their wife well, and the older guys who come here tend to worship their exotic Asian wives.

By the way I'm also a PhD. I actually tend to prefer the housewife types. The majority of men are the same. A highly educated woman has no real value to me - it's looks and personality I value.

There are loads of educated, single women here in the economic powerhouse of Asia. If they wanted to marry Asian men, they would. If they wanted a younger guy, they would date younger guys.

Your explanation captures the facts. For all the complicated explanations and speculation, it comes down to personal wishes, and how both sides in a relationship have their needs and motivations. There is certainly some white fever here, but in most cases, I hear the hope from filipinas that the foreign man will treat them better.( They are sometimes quite disappointed.)
In general however, the men who are in the Philippines for marriage reasons are a great deal better than the monger foreigner types who infest the place in some areas- mostly Angeles City and some in Cebu.

If you are a decent man and know how to conduct yourself, you will have very little competition here. It is NOT overrun with foreign men seeking brides as some claim here. Marriages of Filipinas to foreign men number in the few thousand per yer in a country of 90+ million. If I recall correctly, the total number of all Americans marrying foreign nationals world-wide is only about 50,000 per year. That is a drop in the bucket, not some mass movement as some would like to imagine.

[davewe]

Welcome to the forum!

I'm in China now, but some of the same rules apply.

The first is that Asian women find it much harder to marry as they age - their value in the dating market place must plummet by nearly 10% for every year over the age of 32. Older women can marry or remarry, but it's quite rare here. The hotter 30yo women on Chinese Love Links are very picky, but by 33 they're glad to date almost anyone.

The second is that the local guys are often jerks. Well certainly on my own dating site Vietnamese and Filipino men were usually the worst when it came to uploading childish content. No wonder Western men are seen as more sensible and mature.

The third is that there's a bit of white fever going on here - white skin is highly desirable in Asia. But even if you're not white, then being from the USA or Canada is also a big bonus.

Finally Western men are popular here as they're seen to be good husband material. They treat their wife well, and the older guys who come here tend to worship their exotic Asian wives.

By the way I'm also a PhD. I actually tend to prefer the housewife types. The majority of men are the same. A highly educated woman has no real value to me - it's looks and personality I value.

There are loads of educated, single women here in the economic powerhouse of Asia. If they wanted to marry Asian men, they would. If they wanted a younger guy, they would date younger guys.

Your explanation captures the facts. For all the complicated explanations and speculation, it comes down to personal wishes, and how both sides in a relationship have their needs and motivations. There is certainly some white fever here, but in most cases, I hear the hope from filipinas that the foreign man will treat them better.( They are sometimes quite disappointed.)
In general however, the men who are in the Philippines for marriage reasons are a great deal better than the monger foreigner types who infest the place in some areas- mostly Angeles City and some in Cebu.

If you are a decent man and know how to conduct yourself, you will have very little competition here. It is NOT overrun with foreign men seeking brides as some claim here. Marriages of Filipinas to foreign men number in the few thousand per yer in a country of 90+ million. If I recall correctly, the total number of all Americans marrying foreign nationals world-wide is only about 50,000 per year. That is a drop in the bucket, not some mass movement as some would like to imagine.

xiongmao, Outwest and Pete are spot on in my experience. Based on your description you will have no problems finding women interested in marriage and not because of the stereotypes sometimes espoused (green card and gold digging). You also indicated a family interest. Whether this means marrying a 30-something Pinay with children already or a younger Pinay who wants children, this gives you an even bigger leg up on some older guys no longer interested in family.

As Outwest says, if you are a decent man you will have no problems. And as an intelligent, educated man, you will find many women who will want you to lead the way. Good luck and keep asking questions.

[ladislav]

One reason is the colonial structure and little class mobility ( not as bad as Thailand or India) but still pretty bad. So, they want to improve their species as do we- whiter, richer, better life for kids.

There are not that many younger Americans in the Philippines - they have no money to be there plus many are very nationalistic- they want American women.

The only young ones are some GIs and these are busy training and then, they go whoring- what else would a younger man do?

[Taco]

I just married a Filipina in her 30's less than a year ago and the love boat's still sailing. If your marriage minded Filipinas are your best bet, there isn't another ethnic group of women on this planet that can compete with them. However, you do need to be very selective when choosing one, honesty should be your first priority in a wife. Also, pick one from the Southern Philippines, Visayas, Mindanao region, their less arrogant than Luzon women.

To answer your question. Filipinas love mixed kids that's one reason. Also, having an American husband is seen as a status symbol even if your poor, like me. Lastly, to most Filipinas your hung like a horse, which benefits you and her.

[Anonymous1]

Isn't the reason for them going for older white males all about money? Or is there more to it?

I'm sure the white males being more educated, more gentle and wiser compared to the average poor Filipino guy who looks barbaric and has nothing to live for, may be another factor as well.

The PI isn't a spiritual place by the Western standard of the word. But there is a harmony there that is lacking in Western cultures. The social vibe just feels smoother. In that sense you could call it spiritual.

LOL thats because you hang around hookers all the time

lol and not every filipino guy is poor and nothing to live for....oh winston...and you wonder why you dont meet any good girls in the Philippines

[Taco]

I was at the Immigration office(in PI) today and saw a 60 yr old Dutch guy with a Filipina wife that was in her early twenties, she was cute too. They had a son that was about 3 yrs old. If you play your cards right you can marry women here that are better looking than what most college freshman are dating in America.

[Raja]

Greetings,

PS - Just occurred to me I missed mentioning a critical issue that is discussed in some of the threads. That is, in the Philippines there seems to be a whole different way of feeling, being. Could it be just a greater awareness of the heart, and that the answer to my above query is that SOME older American men DO operate from the heart and make the younger Filipina women feel safe, honored, and protected. Could it be that???

With the US Mil bases gone your completion is basically the monger class which is no competition at all. While there may be little social mobility within a province something like 10% of the adult population leaves the islands for extended periods so almost everybody has family that has moved away making it a less desperate act then it is for the man who goes in search of a mate.

[xiongmao]

I don't usually rate Filipinas, but I looked on LoveMe and there were plenty who interested me. The cute and curvy ones especially.

Well I'm gonna have to go there and see some Filipinas in real life. There are very few here, I guess they can't afford to study here or they see no point in learning Chinese because they already speak English. They stand little chance of getting work permits.

Anyway, Filipinas are a great choice if you're an older guy who still wants kids or you just want a non-ambitious housewife type.

If you want an attractive woman nearer to your own age or a super smart and sophisticated lady then come to China. There are some still very hot older women here. I see them shopping in Carrefour and they're still looking great in little leather shorts. Hmm, there are just so many interesting sights in that store