Easy SEX with women in general

[Contrarian Expatriate]

I don't understand. Isn't the point of going abroad to find a woman who won't give it up so easily, who still has her virginity, who has never had a real boyfriend, and who is good natured?

Quite the to contrary! Women abroad tend to have a much more relaxed attitude about sex and they don't have the hang ups that American women tend to have about it.

There are some exceptions like Muslim countries, or village girls, but on the whole, sex is seen as a natural part of life not a commodity with which to reward or punish men.

[Raja]

I don't understand. Isn't the point of going abroad to find a woman who won't give it up so easily, who still has her virginity, who has never had a real boyfriend, and who is good natured?

Quite the to contrary! Women abroad tend to have a much more relaxed attitude about sex and they don't have the hang ups that American women tend to have about it.

There are some exceptions like Muslim countries, or village girls, but on the whole, sex is seen as a natural part of life not a commodity with which to reward or punish men.

I recognize the user name. He comes from the Fil/Am or Canadian community in his case. He probably bought into the virgin Filipina myth and doesn't know that a World Heath Organization study shows that 36% of Filipinas are unmarried when their first pregnacy occurs and eventhough abortion is illegal the Philippines has one of the higher abortion rates in the world.

[Jackal]

It's almost as if, if a man asks the woman, he is begging her to make the first move, he is submitting himself to her, which is all backwards. If the man says, 'I want to/I'd like to...' he is making the first move, yet still asking permission, which is very different, it's being respectful rather than outright submissive. He is still confident, and he can still come across as a gentleman.

I think it also depends on the delivery. A man asking in an almost pleading, apologetic way would probably not get anywhere. A man asking in a confident, self-assured (even if very polite and gentle) way won't be seen as the same. Submission from a man feels a bit unnatural, but respectfulness from a man creates gratitude and admiration. I hope this makes sense

Hi BellaRuth,

Yeah, that does make sense. Thanks.

In feminist cultures, only about 3% of men who are the "alpha males" are given permission by society to act like men. The other 97% of men are just expected to be asexual worker bees who have no right to approach women.

I realize how growing up in the ultra-feminist USA really messed up my dating instincts.

Feminism conditions men to do the exact opposite of what women find attractive. Then the men wonder why women don't like them when they've just done exactly what the feminist women have asked them to do, and then the feminist women complain that they can't find any "real men" while at the same time promoting propaganda which discourages the existence of "real men." Crazy, crazy shit! The US is so f***ed up.

[Jackal]

Hi BellaRuth,

I'm enjoying listening to your female viewpoint, and I'd like to ask you a few more questions, if you don't mind.

On which date do you think a man should kiss you on the lips? (The 1st date, 2nd date, etc.)

And on which date would you want a man to finger you?

Of course, this is assuming that the man hasn't made some horrible mistakes which totally turned you off.

[BellaRuth]

Hi BellaRuth,

I'm enjoying listening to your female viewpoint, and I'd like to ask you a few more questions, if you don't mind.

On which date do you think a man should kiss you on the lips? (The 1st date, 2nd date, etc.)

And on which date would you want a man to finger you?

Of course, this is assuming that the man hasn't made some horrible mistakes which totally turned you off.

Hi Jackal.

I'm not sure how to answer this because we don't have the dating 'culture' here, and I've never experienced it myself at least. There's no 'what to do/what not to do on this date' that I hear of in American films.

I'd just say relax and see what happens, without worrying about how long to wait. I have no idea what else I can say so I'll draw from experience. With my current boyfriend we pretty much kissed straight away. He was a bit shy, so I made it clear I liked him and he said he wanted to kiss me so that was it, I was really happy and was walking on air. It was over a few days as we were in same class, and we had talked a lot as friends, but we weren't on a date or a 'couple' at that point (though we were soon after!).

If you like someone I don't think kissing would be a big deal at any point. Use your instincts. Maybe get as close as you can and see how the response is. It's lovely to tell a girl you want to kiss her anyway, she will feel beautiful with such a compliment, and probably took the time to look nice so that you would want to kiss her. If you are going on a date with her on the first place you'll be fine to say something like that, she's already interested enough to at least love the compliment!

As for fingering. Hmmm. Well, if the two of you are alone together in a private place (presumably you would be!) she'll probably know you are going to try it on and be prepared for it, she won't be naive. So make a move, it won't come as a surprise. If you go slow she'll probably end up carried off by the moment anyway, but if not, at least you know it's not time yet. There's no shame in showing your interest. She can always say no and postpone it a little if she's not ready. Yes it's nice to show respect and act like a gentleman, but you still are a man who likes this girl, so she knows what you'd like to do. There's no way she'd agree to be alone with you in such a way unless she was ready for you to make your move (even if she is just ready to say no for this time).

[Marcus Aurelius]

I have never asked for sex, with domestic or foreign girls. I actually...would have thought this would be rather obvious to most guys. Asking ANY girl equates to begging, to weakness. Just go in for the kill. I find you be slowly and gradually aggessive, foreplay is a big turn on to women (although sometimes a fast approach can work well for shock sort of value), just keep doing more until they stop you..or don't. Lol I can't even imagine asking for sex.

[E_Irizarry]

I have never asked for sex, with domestic or foreign girls. I actually...would have thought this would be rather obvious to most guys. Asking ANY girl equates to begging, to weakness. Just go in for the kill. I find you be slowly and gradually aggessive, foreplay is a big turn on to women (although sometimes a fast approach can work well for shock sort of value), just keep doing more until they stop you..or don't. Lol I can't even imagine asking for sex.

In AmeriKKKa, you might want to ask or end up on Rikers'. Trying to
"go for it (the sex)" equates to accidentally brushing up against a White American woman on the tight-spaced 4-train in NYC, and alas she mistakes it for a grope with a NYPD goon yankin' your ass off the train holding up everybody during rush hour.

[Jackal]

There's no shame in showing your interest.

Exactly! Yes, thanks, that's exactly what I needed to hear! In a normal culture in which most people are not mentally ill, this is how things are.

In America, women are so obnoxious and would say things like "Take your hands off me, you stupid jerk! I ONLY LIKE JOCKS. YOU'RE A LOSER!!! How dare you even think I could be interested in you!"

Now I'm living in the land of opportunity, but first I need to unfuck my mindset from feminist conditioning and think sensibly about these things.

You're very sweet and helpful, BellaRuth. May your beaver always find wood!

[gsjackson]

Yes, but the forces of rectitude are on the case. In what can be viewed as the ultimate absurdity of political correctness, Oberlin College in Ohio a few years ago instituted a campus policy under which aspirants to sexual congress must go through a strict procedure of explicit request and granting of permission at each step along the way -- "may I kiss you?" yes, you may proceed." "May I touch your breast?" "Yes, proceed." Etc. At no step along the way is the formal request and explicit permission to be omitted, upon penalty of possible expulsion.

Tell me why anyone is still living in this insane country?

[ssjparris]

"...May your beaver always find wood! " - Jackal. HAHAHAHAAHA

[NorthAmericanguy]

In reviewing this thread, I just want to point out that I disagree that men are the aggressors and that women are the passive ones because it's not so black and white like that; men and women can be both passive and aggressive depending on the situation. And the situation in America is that women don't really hit on average men, or initiate sexual advances with average men for a myriad of reasons, such as, having fear of being labeled a slut.

So as a guy here in the states, you need to be very aggressive with women to beak past this barrier and you're going to be initiating sex pretty often because women in the states have been conditioned to be this way.

There are exceptions however, and that is women will be VERY sexually aggressive towards men who are:

1. Very good looking
2. Rich
3. Famous

Especially no 2 and no 3! Case in point, I knew a guy who owned a Ferrari and women use to flash him when he would drive around, and women would leave their panties on his windshield with a phone number on it.

Anyhow, I happen to be close to number one (but I'm not bragging nor am I some kind of modal) and I have had the experience of American women throwing themselves at me wanting to have sex so don't believe it that girls are always passive and won't make any advances. If anything, they are only passive towards YOU because YOU don't excite them to a high degree compared to the next man.

Ha, but that same girl, if they could get in a room with their favorite celebrity, the most shy "God fearing" woman would drop to her knees and start going to town with no problem. lol, why do you think all them girls be trying to get back stage after the concert?

[Jackal]

What's your point, Northamericanguy? All of us already know that American women act like total whores for very rich, good-looking, and famous men.

Just simply saying, "Be rich, good-looking, or famous" does nothing for men who come to this site.

Your point about the necessity of being extremely aggressive is interesting, though. But wouldn't a guy who is extremely aggressive and not rich, good-looking, or famous just be thought of as a creep or a rapist?

[NorthAmericanguy]

What's your point, Northamericanguy? All of us already know that American women act like total whores for very rich, good-looking, and famous men.

Just simply saying, "Be rich, good-looking, or famous" does nothing for men who come to this site.

I was making a comment that women are not passive little creatures who stand by and wait for men to be aggressive with them. As far as being rich, good-looking, or famous, well you CAN realistically improve on your looks. I know I did! I got braces, I got contacts, I hit the gym and changed my style of clothes. On THEN did girls start to notice and make sexual advances towards me.

But wouldn't a guy who is extremely aggressive and not rich, good-looking, or famous just be thought of as a creep or a rapist?

No, guys who come off as creeps are the ones that give off bad vibes, they stare at women but don't approach them, or they go about trying to get a woman in a odd unconventional way.

Just be direct and up front and if they don't want anything to do with you quickly move on to the next.

[Jackal]

As far as being rich, good-looking, or famous, well you CAN realistically improve on your looks. I know I did! I got braces, I got contacts, I hit the gym and changed my style of clothes. On THEN did girls start to notice and make sexual advances towards me.

In high school, I did lift weights and run. I wasn't huge, but I did have six-pack abs. However, I might as well have still been invisible. A nice body wasn't enough for girls. They also wanted the asshole American jock mentality, which I refused to display because it went against my values.

Just be direct and up front and if they don't want anything to do with you quickly move on to the next.

That sounds like solid advice.

[DCX_10]

Ｄｅｌｅｔｅｄ