I do NOT consider men with Asian wives'losers'.

[shogunpanda007]

Thai culture is gold digging and materialistic. A man has to pay a bride's family "ransom" just to "release" her for marriage. A "Farang", or foreigner relationship is taboo and looked down upon in Thai society. Check this Australian guy Tim Sharky who lives in Thailand and is dead-on accurate about Thai women and how they manipulate "farangs" for sugar daddy relationships. Tim Sharky is definitely Top G material and quite hilariously honest too.

[MrMan]

Men like @Yohan are winners in my book,because he lives in a developed country,has a way more attractive type of woman than the average filipina or indonesian with low level brains,lives where it is safe,clean,cultured,intelligent,educated,modern but not degenerate and has a good income to do what he wants.

What I consider as losers,are men that go to the phillipines to slum dive with uneducated women because they're usually bald,fat or ugly or old or all of these and then claim that the phillipines is a paradise for love,because they can't make it elsewhere.

Are you one of the guys who said he'd had sex with a post-op man? If that's the case, then you shouldn't be calling men who find real women losers, even if the women are bald, fat, and ugly. You took a dig at Indonesians, and my wife Indonesian here. She isn't uneducated. She's intelligent. Every culture has it's own culture. You didn't explain what you meant by 'cultured'. Do you mean eating caviar while verbally analyzing some stupid-looking piece of modern art while wearing a fur coat? I don't care if a woman is cultured in that way.

My wife has a sarjana degree, a four-year degree. I don't think I've ever seen a truly bald Indonesian woman. Maybe I've seen a very old women who was losing her hair a little. I'd imagine there are some cancer patients. There are some stocky stout Indonesian women, but I haven't seen any morbidly obese ones, and the young ones tend to have relatively low body weight compared to the US. Ugly? There are women I find not particularly attractive everywhere. I found fewer stunners for my personal tastes in Indonesia, percentage-wise, than in the US or South Korea. But there are some, and I married one. I noticed maybe 8 really nice-looking female cousins of my wife's generation. Maybe one more that wouldn't be my type for looks that most men would like the looks of. Now I am thinking of another like that. There are probably lots of them.

Maybe if a man married an uneducated Indonesian maid, he could have a very poor partner for conversation. But I do talk with my wife about a number of things. But there are things I can discuss with men in depth in an intellectual conversation that I can rarely find a woman to discuss in the same way. I cannot interact with my wife the same way I do with a male intellectual in a discussion. I kind of think of that as normal, more about her sex than her nationality, based on conversations with women in the US and elsewhere. It's no big deal. Have other friends.

I have a doctorate, and I do not discuss some aspects of my field with my wife. That doesn't mean she is not intelligent. It's just not her area. I can read, discuss online, interact with colleagues.

I don't consider men who marry uneducated Filipinas to be losers. Now consider this, you could marry a 'cultured' European woman who can give a snobby analysis of some stupid piece of modern art while sipping a fine wine, eating caviar, and wearing a fur coat. Or you could marry an uneducated Filipina or Indonesian maid whose really sweet and kind, but doesn't wear fur coats, sip fine wine, and give her bogus opinions in an art gallery.

But let's say this hypothetical uneducated Filipina or Indonesian is just as pretty as her European counterpart and the Southeast Asian is:

10x easier to get along with
10x more obedient
10x more eager and willing to please you in the bedroom
10x more willing to cook you a nice dinner and put effort into it
10x more willing to do the dishes, wash, and iron your clothes

Than the European woman. Does a man have to be a loser to go for the Southeast Asian beauty over the European one? In my hypothetical situation, the Asian is 10x more willing and eager in the bedroom. It's kind of torture to have a beautiful wife, and then she's not willing to have sex.

I'm not saying all Asian women are going to be submissive, sexually eager, happy to cook, etc. compared to European women. But their cultural background gives them some expectations that it is normal for them to be good traditional wives at home, in a lot of cases.

Sexual desire depends on the woman, her drive, how attracted she is to you, how you are getting along, and how you can stir up certain feelings in her. But at least the traditional Southeast Asians don't usually get the heavy feminist ideology. US colleges teach the women that they have a right to say no, and they have to give consent. Traditional Asian women might hear bits and pieces growing up about how a woman is supposed to meet her man's needs. The sex jokes I heard in Indonesia are typically teasing and joking about newly weds having sex. A lot of the jokes imply married couples are supposed to have sex. Americans joke about how they stop having sex after they get married.

Having an Asian wife who is compassionate and understanding, but who isn't an intellectual, may be a more enjoyable experience than having a 'liberated' European or American wife who is more educated and intellectual.

If you choose one over the other, that doesn't mean someone who chooses the other is a 'loser.' They may just have different values.

There are some old sexpats who go to the Philippines or Thailand, find a bar girl, prostitute, or 'semi-pro' looking for a sugar daddy and get married. There are prostitutes in Indonesia, but it does not seem to be as big of a destination for that sort of thing. I get the impression that there are a lot more whores in the US than in Indonesia. American whores tend to be zero dollar whores who do it for free. A lot of Indonesian women, it seems to me, keep their virginity until marriage without whoring around.

If you are looking for a wife, you need to consider virginity. That's a top tier characteristic in a wife.

Yes,filipino culture is warm and social,but so is latin culture,both european and american and I include romanian in this,with beautiful girls with realistic standards,but even this is unattainable to this 'type'.

If you are single and want to find a Romanian or Latino wife, try to find one. That doesn't mean that white men who marry Southeast Asians are losers. You just come off as racist. If you don't like Southeast Asians, how about you keep your mouth shut and fingers off the keys and then people won't know you are racist.

and believe me,if the filipino girls were as 'hard' (because they're not if you have any modicum of value)as say,white venezuelan women,despite the sociality and warmness,and educated and well-off Japanese women were as 'easy'as filipinas despite their less social and more reserved culture,these men would be flocking there.

A wife being difficult to get doesn't make her a better wife. Some good-looking snobby western women play hard to get. That doesn't mean they are high quality. Not playing hard to get might align with a bit of humility, a valuable characterstic. I'm not talking about being easy in the bedroom. A woman can let you know she is interested in you if you are marriage oriented, not trying to just sleep with her. She can also be friendly and open without expressing her interest in words, without playing mind games. A woman who plays mind games, acts uninterested when she isn't, etc. isn't necessarily a higher quality woman.

If you are talking about sleazy and easy Filipinas who hang out in bars and get paid to go home with men, that' s a subset of society. Maybe you are familiar with some prostitution area in the Philippines and think that is representative of the whole country.

I also have the same harsh judgement for men that go for African women,unless it's ethiopia,because having dated 2 ethiopian women of Habesha(Tigray and the other one Gurage)backround living there,ethiopian women TRY to be educated,they have SELF respect(sometimes to the point where one of my girls would go on rants about the superiority of ethiopians),they have standards,and they generally do not sell their bodies to anyone,plus they have class even if from a province.

Africa has a multitude of cultures. Do you know that none of them have positive characteristics like Ethiopian culture?

I am curious if Ethiopian women tend to have undergone female genital mutilation. I feel bad for the women, but if I were single looking for a wife, I wouldn't want her to have had much of the fun bits cut off, and for her to experience pain and want to avoid intercourse because of it.

[Kalinago]

@MrMan your post is full of strawmen and thinly veiled malevolent personal attacks,just like the demonic religion you belong to so I don't expect you to act different,while under the see through veil of a nice guy just like your Kike on a stick that you slavishly follow and get linear squared values from against life itself as it should be lived which lead you to judge me for sleeping with transwomen,as if such sacred priestesses are dirty or shameful !

The rest of your post is just logical fallacies and absolutes setting things in a square box,as if women all belong to some narrow archetype for what's a good woman!

Since you are not discussing this In charity or good faith I will not respond to you further .

We are diametrically opposed to each other's worldviews and sources of how we see the world both inner and outer,both of which influence the other .

I feel sorry for you.

[MrMan]

I remember when I went to Hungary and everybody complained about how sensitive most Americans were. Saying that Americans were way too concerned about what was racist or sexist. Of course, I don't think its surprising to people that the Hungarians would be like that... What is slightly more surprising is that the Italians were like that too. People in Italy really don't worry about appearing PC.

It's funny because there is a similar stereotype in the Philippines, but it isn't about "emotional sensitivity" and being too worried about PC things... the stereotype is that American visitors are often pussies who do not want to try local foods, cannot sleep if it isn't in a hotel, cannot handle hot or humid climates and would always prefer McDonalds or look for a local KFC whenever in a city rather than be found in a local "calinderia" eatery. They're not seen as adventurous. So they often prefer visitors from Australia, Europe or Asian countries who may be more adventurous and willing to try out new things. Americans are known to stay more within their comfort zones which locals look down at them for.

I ate at local restaurants, people's houses, noodle carts, etc., but after a three day bus ride to Padang that delayed an extra day waiting the cross the Sunda Strait, and eating Padang food at every stop, I wanted a pizza or KFC in Padang. The city is huge, but it was hard to find. I also needed to get me a hamburger after staying at my wife's ancestral village for several days. Their food is HOOOOT compared to most Indonesian food. They grow peppers and they sure cook with them. And it's those little bitter ones I don't like so much. I did sleep on the floor.

My in-laws told me a story of an American missionary visitor who they once had who ate nothing they prepared, only wanted white bread. So they kept going to the store and buying white bread. The American would then put cheese-spread on the bread. A shower with cold water and a bucket was also not good enough, nor was the bed. Everything was complained about and compared negatively to the way things were 'back home'. This weirded them out and I was told, on day one, that "thank goodness you're not picky and cowardly like those Americans who cannot live without Western luxuries."

I think missionaries are supposed to be able to sleep on the floor. If it's tropical, the cold, or almost lukewarm water that's been sitting out, isn't so bad. I probably bathed with cool water for much of my time in Indonesia, but we usually ended up getting a water heater after staying there a while.

On one trip in Indonesia where I was doing some ministry, so kind of like a missionary trip of sorts, I used a bit of toilet paper in my hosts squat toilet, hoping it was small enough quantities to wash it down without doing the local wet hand-to-heinie routine. But I clogged it and my host got a stick, which is probably as good as a plunger for squat toilets. If I converted completed to water instead of toilet paper, maybe I could go full local.

My kids are half-Asian, but may be more cushy American than I am. They dreaded the village. When we talked about going on vacation to Indonesia, they liked it. They were hoping for Bali. I said we could go up to the village again, where the water buffalo are. They didn't seem as excited about that.

My last employer in Indonesia put me up in cushy apartments. The last place they put me in had fitness centers, and choice of huge tile hot tubs, cold tubs, a sauna, etc. I even had a driver. But I did sleep on the floor in the cold mountains on a trip to visit my wife's relatives. And if you don't stay the night with them and go to a hotel, unless you have a good reason, some of them might be offended.

[Kalinago]

Cultured has to do with inner values and not sipping expensive champagne,you have dated a Filipina if you think most of them are cultured .

Edumacation means nothing to me as displayed by you you are edumacated but not educated or very smart and open minded where it matters .

You have no experience with habesha or European women in romance and make assumptions from what you read and stereotype as if it's a movie.

I have dated Filipinos and know they are low quality in general,that's a opinion I have and that's been formulated from experience.

If you disagree with that then I don't mind but don't try to shame me for having a view which threatens your paradigm of success you've built up.

And don't ever try imposing your silly reptile Judeo-Christian morality on me

[publicduende]

The same happened to me... I lose interest. My tastes, they seem to always change. There are some things that are constant, such as my love for spicy food for instance, but whichever cuisine I prefer most will change from week to week, musical tastes, physical preferences, the types of girls that mystify and draw me in... it's kind of fascinating. And no I'm no Gemini, my Zodiac sign is supposed to be a sturdy and reliable one, lol. A girl I dated before was a Gemini, and oddly enough she was more stable and dependable than I was. I was the one who ultimately proved to be "too much for her" to handle. A little too wild and untamed, at the time.

It's natural to miss those little indiscretions, the wild shenenigans, the thrill of the hunt, the chase. Even the thrill of committing a "crime", a passionate one, an affair, and to carry on with life as if nothing happened, undiscovered. Because it IS a thrill. A guilty sort of pleasure. But you're right... there's too much at stake, too much to lose. I'm perfectly at peace and contend with my life, most of the time. For a while now I have been in this state of blissful joy, and it feels genuine to me. A sense of peace has come over me. There's always going to be the lure of dark and shady places, dark and shady things, late night jammings with wild girls, clandestine tours, sneaking around motels... the siren call of the night. But surely we are strong enough to refuse that call.

That's right. Even if a foreign man who doesn't look completely hideous will easily (or more easily, compared to any other place) find themselves a few extra-marital escapades to dig into, that doesn't mean they need to, or have to. My first year and half to two years in Davao were a blast because I was essentially deluding myself that the reason I couldn't commit is because none of the girl I was seeing were "perfect" and "ticked all the boxes".

All of them were worth a f*ck, none of them were worth my commitment. In reality, at least half of the girls I met were very decent: many were pretty even by Pinoy standards, most had their own jobs/careers, at least half of them could sustain a conversation that wasn't about food and local TV dramas. It was just me hiding behind the "need the perfect gal" as an excuse to keep spinning the carousel. Soon enough I realised that this attitude was not only breaking a few hearts, it was also making me feel a massive hypocrite. By mid 2017 I had met a least a dozen girls who were leaps and bounds better than any of the ladies the typical fly-by-night foreigner meets on a site and marries after 2 weeks of island hopping, including my business partner back in London. So the problem was me.

I finally convinced myself that the ultimate quality of my Filipina fiancee/wife should be that of hailing from an upper class family and an elite university, on top of all the others: a tall order even for an upper class Filipino boy educated at an elite university! I wanted too much and I was lucky I found that "too much" in C. And she's not perfect, either. Some other girls I dated were sassier, or sexier, or more adventurous. Most other were less stubborn and opinionated, which would have probably led to a more placid, if boring, life together, something I have learned to appreciate as age goes by.

I think the key for people like you and me, @MarcosZeitola, and many other on this forum is to seriously count our blessings before our personal problems, especially those that are dictated by the times we live in and are totally outside our control. I suggested @Winston, time and again, to feel thankful that his wealthy Dad basically sponsored his life as a "free-spirited thinker".

Sometimes what we feel entititled to by birth right is simply the result of a good mix of stubborness and sheer luck. It could have gone better and we would have wound up as multimillionaire entrepreneurs, with a young model fiancee and a harem of even young mistresses. It could have also gone far, far worse...