What's Up Guys...

[Merc]

Hi all, I'm Jon. I've lurked around here for a while and finally signed up. I'm a youthful 40, in great shape ,and own a few web businesses. I lived for about 10 years in Northern Europe, where I have friends I still visit; and I'm considered quite social and charming there. But...I moved home to the US a couple of years ago, and for the first time in many years, found that I had virtually no social or dating life.

Perhaps it's because I stayed gone so long, but when I returned to the US, it seemed socially awkward, shallow, immature and (if I'm honest) culturally backwards.

I appreciate Winston doing this site because frankly, I know he's right. Before I moved abroad my social life in the US was a 2 out of 10 (at best). When I moved abroad all that changed dramatically, and I made true friends and dated gorgeous women. Actually, I lost my visa to stay in Europe, otherwise I probably would never have come back.

I've been back a couple of years and I've really tried to make things happen here. But now I have finally had enough. This year (2009) I'm planning to leave the country. I haven't decided exactly where I'll go yet (I'm considering a few places), but I do know that I'm definitly leaving, and "sooner rather than later."

I have seen the quality of my social and dating life go down significantly here in the US, and frankly, life is too short for this bullshit. You know what they say: once you get used to champagne, it is tough to go back to kool-aide.

If anyone wants to chat and/or share info about moving abroad, please be in touch. I'm social and cooperative by nature (as opposed to paranoid and competitive). Perhaps that's WHY I don't fit in the US?

Be well,
Jon

[mobstersreport]

Hey Jon, you definately are not alone. I may not have lived overseas, nor have had any travels overseas, ( yet ). But I and many others here know EXACTLY what you are talking about, when it comes to the dating scene here in the U.S.

I've spent my whole life here. Since my late teens, until this point in my life of 32 years of age. I have been considered by others, as a classic "dateless loser." but what's the catch? why am I being called such a rude verbal gesture when I have done everything I could from seducion manuals, to pick-up video material, pick-up ebooks, and more. Yet, I go out there in the dating scene. And I still come home alone with no girlfriend in my life here in my local area of North East America?

I can go online and communicate with a lady from overseas and it's so comforting and easy to talk to most ladies from different countries abroad, than I can get here in the states from ladies. As for my social lifestyle. I have no complications. I have no difficulties in approaching or talking with people, and women for that matter.

I'm sick and tired of the horrible dating scene here in the states where having "a choice" in the "dating scene" is a nightmare. I cannot even have an intelligent conversation with a lady here without drama or 5 minute interval chat convos from "her side." it's a game that I do not want to play. I have no time for it. And you are right! "life is too short!" for the bullshit and games ladies play. Even both sides of the sex in terms of the dating scene here in the states, are playing the exact same format of "the pick-up game."

I value socializing and talking with people. But there's just no climax in my life at this point for true happiness, until I go abroad. I congragulate you on making a "wise move" in packing your stuff and running towards the hills of leaving and going abroad, to enjoy your happiness.

You'll find many individuals like myself, Winston and others here. Who have heard and are living your story of the scenario of America, when it comes to the dating scene.

I salute you and I welcome you aboard. I'm also am a fan on Winston Wu's work and experiences. This website and his experiences, that are PROVEN, is the fact of why I am going abroad this year in 2009.

Take good care and welcome aboard. At least, I know how you feel about the social decline of the atmosphere here in America. You are not alone in your experiences. As you are correct and you're spot-on in your analysis and experiences.

Cheers,
Dwayne

[Winston]

Hi Jon,
Welcome to the forum! Wow you have a great testimonial that exemplifies my meaning well and about how it is to return to the US when you have it better abroad.

Do you mind if I add your account to this page of relevant testimonials? http://www.happierabroad.com/ebook/Page74b.htm

Why couldn't you extend your visa in Europe or just go to another European country south? I guess the answer must be complicated.

Maybe you can consider Asia on your next move abroad?

I'm sure with your web businesses, you can live anywhere right?

Can you tell us what the key to success in web businesses is? Many of us here are interested in that venue as a means to support ourselves while abroad.

Glad to hear from you,
Winston

[Mr S]

Yeah, why you lose your visa to Europe? Couldn't you just reapply or go elsewhere in Europe? Why go back to the states? Everytime I go back there to visit relatives I feel like committing suicide it sucks so bad, ha ha.

[Merc]

Thanks for the great words of encouragement guys. Much appreciated!

About my EU visa situation: Here's the short version: I had a work permit through my employer, but the company went under, leaving me visa-less. This was complicated by a tax problem, because the government found out I had lived there without a visa when I first arrived for about a year (which was true), so they instructed me to:

1. Pay huge back taxes/penalties for the year I was there illegally.
2. THEN, leave the country (because my visa had run out).

I opted to simply leave.

The whole thing really left a bad taste in my mouth because I felt like I had been screwed by the bureaucracy. Just the fact that they could so easily kick me out of the place that had become my home ( with all my friends, business and social contacts, etc.) seemed so ridiculously unfair. I hired lawyers, etc. to fight the situation, but to no avail.

So, I resigned myself to return to the US, and decided to make the best of it. And I have certainly tried -- I'm not a quitter by any means. But now I've reached the point where I have "given just about all I can take," so I'm looking for an exit ASAP.

I'm considering Asia (especially Philippines). I'm also interested in Costa Rica, Brazil, even Eastern Europe (Estonia, etc). Obviously, I'm still in the research phase right now, but once the desicion is made, I'll be moving pretty quickly. If anyone else is getting out this year, I'm not opposed to teaming up; just be in touch.

By the way Winston, feel free to use any of my scribbling on your testimonials page -- no problem. Maybe it will help motivate someone who's contemplating getting out.

About my web businesses: I think I'll have to save that one for another day--there's too much to get into (haha). I've been doing it about five years, and I'm really big in the personal development niche, as most of my educational background is in that area.

I'll leave it there for now, but I truly appreciate all the support guys!
Jon

[Winston]

Hi Jon,
Thanks for the clarification. But what I don't understand is, when you left that country, why didn't you just go to a neighboring country and start a new life? If you were in Norway, why didn't you just go to Sweden or Finland, for example? Or go down south to Italy or Greece? Most Americans love it there.

[Merc]

"why didn't you just go to a neighboring country and start a new life? If you were in Norway, why didn't you just go to Sweden or Finland, for example?"

Hey Winston, One reason was because of the new EU and EEC rules. You don't get a Norwegian visa these days, you get a "Shengan Visa." It's to do with the Shengan Agreement that binds most of the EU and surrounding countries together politically and for immigration issues. It gives you access to all those countries, but losing it denies you access to all of them too.

Of course, there are ways to get around some of these rules, but as I mentioned, at the time I was extremely upset that I could be kicked out of my home, separated from my friends and business connections so easily. It really up-rooted my life to a great extent, and I never wanted to give any bureaucracy that much power to "make or break me" again.

But after being back in the US and experiencing a lower level of social and dating contact than I can remember in my lifetime, I've softened my views somewhat on living as an immigrant in another country (haha). I decided I could handle the insecurity of living as an immigrant, but I couldn't handle having zero social life.

So I'm doing my research and getting a plan together to go somewhere that suits me better. I'm particularly interested in cheaper countries, where my decent income might afford me a very high standard of living. Of course quality of life is also a big issue, so culture, security, dating, and lots of other issues come into play. Any tips you may have would be appreciated.

[Winston]

I see. Couldn't your Norwegian friends help you? Those are usually countries with friendly governments. Can you go back there again? Or would you have to pay heavy fines to return there?

Sure, going to a cheap country like Philippines, Thailand or South America would get you a higher standard of living and be seen as a higher status too (which women prize highly, probably more than looks) but then you'd be putting up with inefficient corrupt governments, dirty streets, etc. It's a tradeoff. But hey, it's worth trying. If you like Asian women (do you?) you'll love the Philippines and Thailand. They make love with a warmth, tenderness and sensuality that the white women lack. It's hard to explain. You gotta experience it.

If you have any questions about Asia, just ask me, Ladislav, Mr S, or Momopi here, as we all have some experience with this region.

[ishwri]

Hey whatsup, im Ishmell. Im 24 years old and I currently live in Tampa, Florida. I cant agree more with the material ive been reading on this site recently. I have been jumping through hoops and bending over backwards here in america just to get a girl to even look at me and im a decent looking guy with a job. You cant go out and get a girl anymore you have hope and pray that you end up bumping into a girl thats your match but I came to the conclusion its a very slim chance that an american woman is a good match for me. Even if I was feeling a good vibe with an american girl I wouldnt know what to say because shes been scorned and has a bad attitude that a simple " hi, whats your name" makes me look like a creep. American women are the worst quality women on the planet, men like us deserve better, thats why I refuse to settle for them. I want to travel abroad, and soon move to a different country, maybe the Dominican Republic, Ive had my eye on Rio de Janeiro Brazil for a long time, the culture is great and the women are unbelieveable. Im thinking of starting an internet business where I can work from anywhere in the world, anyone interested collaborating or have ideas just send an email: ishwri@yahoo.com

[Kris]

If you like Asian women (do you?) you'll love the Philippines and Thailand. They make love with a warmth, tenderness and sensuality that the white women lack. It's hard to explain. You gotta experience it.

That's what I miss. Most women although they claim they want it themselves can't be bothered to give this warmth or just a simple cuddle. I put my head in one English girl's lap and she said "You're like a dog." Great. Thanks!!!

One Russian girl I was with wouldn't hold hands in the street saying only children did that. I think she was the exception though. One nice thing you sometimes see on the escalators of the St Petersburg Metro is the girl standing on the step in front of the man facing him with her arms round him and sometimes a gentle kiss. St Pete's has the deepest Metro in the World and it takes a long time to get to the top or bottom.

[fox]

it's ironic that there is so much pick up \ seduction material getting guys to chase the undesirable American\western women.

and most of the pick up stuff always comes from the mindset that you are the problem- not the women...

[jamesbond]

it's ironic that there is so much pick up \ seduction material getting guys to chase the undesirable American\western women.

and most of the pick up stuff always comes from the mindset that you are the problem- not the women...

Isn't that something? This PUA stuff teaches men how to pursue western women (women in the US, UK, Canada and Australia). So you are paying money to learn how to pick up western women (which are the most undesirable women in the world).

On top of that, PUA teaches men that if the woman doesn't respond to your seduction techniques then it's you who is the problem, not the undesirable western woman!

[SamCru5953]

it's ironic that there is so much pick up \ seduction material getting guys to chase the undesirable American\western women.

and most of the pick up stuff always comes from the mindset that you are the problem- not the women...

The biggest problem with PUA garbage is that it makes women the object. You, the man, are the object to be desired by a woman. If you believe that and act on it you will be met with success.

[Jester]

Thanks for the great words of encouragement guys. Much appreciated!

About my EU visa situation: Here's the short version: I had a work permit through my employer, but the company went under, leaving me visa-less. This was complicated by a tax problem, because the government found out I had lived there without a visa when I first arrived for about a year (which was true), so they instructed me to:

1. Pay huge back taxes/penalties for the year I was there illegally.
2. THEN, leave the country (because my visa had run out).

I opted to simply leave.

The whole thing really left a bad taste in my mouth because I felt like I had been screwed by the bureaucracy. Just the fact that they could so easily kick me out of the place that had become my home ( with all my friends, business and social contacts, etc.) seemed so ridiculously unfair. I hired lawyers, etc. to fight the situation, but to no avail.

So, I resigned myself to return to the US, and decided to make the best of it. And I have certainly tried -- I'm not a quitter by any means. But now I've reached the point where I have "given just about all I can take," so I'm looking for an exit ASAP.

I'm considering Asia (especially Philippines). I'm also interested in Costa Rica, Brazil, even Eastern Europe (Estonia, etc). Obviously, I'm still in the research phase right now, but once the desicion is made, I'll be moving pretty quickly. If anyone else is getting out this year, I'm not opposed to teaming up; just be in touch.

By the way Winston, feel free to use any of my scribbling on your testimonials page -- no problem. Maybe it will help motivate someone who's contemplating getting out.

About my web businesses: I think I'll have to save that one for another day--there's too much to get into (haha). I've been doing it about five years, and I'm really big in the personal development niche, as most of my educational background is in that area.

I'll leave it there for now, but I truly appreciate all the support guys!
Jon

Sounds like Denmark or Sweden.

[Jester]

PS -- Merc, thanks for coming out of the closet" and posting.

Interesting situation.

Can you still enter the EU as a tourist?

For non EU and low-tax I guess there's Montenegro, right? I believe residency is available there by forming a corporation in Montenegro. And it's a great European location.

You might give Uruguay a look too. They are easy on offshore income, and Punta del Este would give you a world-class address for Argentinian tail, with a lot less tax and banking bureaucracy.