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Fan Mail and Reader Comments to Happier Abroad


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See Also:

Testimonials that Dating is all about Location!

Letters from Expats who are Happier Abroad

Quotes about Winston Wu



I could not agree more on the sorry state of American women (in terms of dating in general). For me, Chinese women (in China) have been sooooo good, and they are thin and hot; they are well edcuated and will do everything for you. The guys who get stuck here in North America are, well, stuck. This is not even to mention the physical state of the women here; most American women over 30 are obess (not just over-weight). And they are used; who knows how many STDs they have had. I feel sorry for them sometimes.


I applaude you courage and wish you the best.





Hi all, well my story is about the same as yours, but here it is anyway: for a long time I blamed myself for my lack of success with American women. So, I worked hard for many years to improve myself to the point where I would be worthy of a decent American woman. I got myself a Ph.D., then a job at an Ivy-league school, got myself into excellent physical shape, took up lots of cool hobbies like skiing, tennis, ballroom dance... and I was still getting rejected by women who had no business being picky! I had my epiphany when I was 33 and dating an overweight, 42-year-old, divorced mother who dumped me because I didn't have a "wild side". So then I did some traveling to (among other places) Hungary, the Czech Republic, and the Philippines, and beautiful young women couldn't keep their hands off of me! Dating is like real estate- the 3 most important factors are location, location, location!




You don't know me and I don't really know you aside from your very insightful posts that were linked to me a couple years ago. I am someone that made the decision to leave the U.S. to seek my "fortune" abroad. I was always hunting for expat experiences in other countries but most of what's out there is pretty useless or typical drivel.

Well, I stumbled onto your posts and they were a breath of fresh air. Your observations about the cultural/social climate of the different countries in the world are right on the button. I've read quite a few books on sociology and nothing was able to spell it out as bluntly as you have. Congrats, you certainly did impact my life.

I'll be reading this board with great interest.



I like how you put this as the first thing on your site:

"Feel like you don't fit in America? If so, then you've come to the right place for validation and inspiration."

This is enough to make a disenfranchised, disgrunted grown-man cry.
Hell, I even felt a bit emotional when I read that.

I watched your video on
YouTube to how you have fun with the Russian women.  Dude, you look so
happy. Hahahahaa I love it.

I have been in the Philippines for six months, and you nailed it about the social psyche of Pilipinos!
And I thought I was crazy when I was telling people that.  It's nice to know I'm not crazy after all.
I belatedly thank you for validating that, my brother!!!

I live in Davao City, but I was on vacation in the Visayas (Panay, Negros, and Cebu City/Lapu-Lapu island "lang" hahaha).
Man, I learned so new stuff about the Philippines.

I want to ask you a question that is contingent on the social psyche of the average Filipino.

Ok man..cheers!


Winston, I'm the author of the article about Americans interested in dual citizenship. I read your web site with interest, and it's a fascinating take on American life - I passed it along to some friends. However, you're only talking about one part of the U.S.

The U.S. is very divided right now - there is the half that you're talking about: the money grubbing suburban dwellers. But there's a complete other half of the U.S. that's interested in culture, that is taking lower paying jobs because they enjoy what they do and are satisfied with enough money to get by and pursue their hobbies. With all the turmoil that's occurred this decade, I think that is becoming the majority in the U.S. I've done a lot of European travel, and while the cultures are quite different, and the U.S. is no doubt a larger commercial driven place, I really don't see as much of a difference these days as there used to be (even 10 years ago). And I don't think it's necessarily the Americainization of the world, but rather a world becoming smaller.

Anyway, that's just my opinion. I completely understand why the U.S. has such a bad image around the world these days, and that has a lot to do with a few powerful people on top that don't have the support of their countrymen. I don't feel that's a true representation of what the country is all about, especially not right now. America doesn't rule the world, and that's what the true majority of Americans think. Please don't publish this (or at least don't use my name), this is just my observation I wanted to share with you.


Hello Winston. How are things going? How is life in Philippines? Congrats on your new son! Your biographical account here is quite a story. I agree with you on so many levels. Your attention to historical accuracy allowed me to really see the world in your shoes as you laid out the events up till 2001. Although I graduated from a different high school in California and attended at a different time in 1996-2000, my story is also much in parallel. Many of your observations hold true to this day. This is why I felt wholeheartedly compelled to read it. Your feelings of confusion, inadequacy, loneliness, desperation, and sadness created years of psychological baggage. Those fantasies of white girls, daily suffocation in the public school environment, and desire to be a normal alpha male made matters even worse. When the internet took hold in 1996, I also tried to visit online dating sites, of course, there wasn't any at that time but rudimentary websites featuring singles. I had been hopeless as I was shocked to see almost all white women were interested in white males. If not, you had to be Latino or black. I always asked myself but why, if California was a place with so many diverse people, why weren't their opinions just as diverse?? I agree with you 100% about the new wave of feminism that came in the mid-90s. From what I remember, feminism was extremely high at that time, and in my freshman year I had no clue that this kind of feminism had been a wave across society. I felt the effects of this feminism when I was called a "creep" or "weirdo" so many times for simply saying hello to girls sitting next to me in my classes. For the next four years, I still tried to talk and attempt to get dates, but my enthusiasm sharply declined after my freshman year, which was replaced with the traditional Asian "study hard" mentality. Now being a decade away from the dark and disheartening 90s, I have finally overcome many years of adolescent torture in the public school system. "American women are not the only women in the world", and frankly most women in the world are not like American women at all. Finding, understanding, and appreciating this principle has been the solution to all my loneliness and desperation in life. Now I embrace it fully and I let others in desperation come to an understanding. I wish somebody could have told me this principle, or at the least made me realize it in my childhood and adolescent years. It would have saved me from years of frustration and psychological scarring.

Winston, continue on with your story...




I've been reading your website and I must say that I've felt your pain.  I live in the Chicago area, I'm 6'4" tall, 230 pounds, excersie daily, black male, I have a college degree, my own place, my own car, I carry myself confidently, I love to read and have intellectual conversations, I'm not afraid to approach women, but yet I'm still single.  Something is wrong here.  I've begun to question my attractiveness, I've begun to question my own worth as a man, and I've begun to question the willingness of women to meet viable men.  I know that I'm not going to be every woman's cup of tea, and I don't have a false sense of entitlement, but this is ridiculous!  It seems like here in America if you approach a woman, you come off a desperate.  What the hell is going here?  How does anybody meet anybody unless you have a large social network?



 I've never been overseas, but I have been to Toronto Canada 4 times and the women there were more receptive and open to me than women in my home city.  I'm seriously considering moving there. 



Hello Winston,

You have a really cool website and I agree with most of your observations. I have had a similar life story to yours of not fitting in in America, getting depressed, and then realizing that the way out is to live overseas. However, I am still in the USA and planning to go to Eastern Europe in a year or so to live (although I have been to Europe several times as a tourist and a student already).

I can't believe that a website like yours even exists! It's very rare that I find anybody with a similar outlook that I can relate to. Most web forums are really fascist dictatorships that suppress any non-mainstream opinions: I hope that your forum will be different and that freedom of speech will actually be allowed here.

I look forward to many interesting conversations with Winston and the other members here. Cheers!


Dear Winston:

My name is ******** and I am a Korean-American who is about to graduate from college in the US. I was in "the matrix" until I went abroad to Seoul two summers ago, then Shanghai last year. My experiences abroad completely changed my view of the US and I pretty much want to live the life you have.

Did you have any problems convincing family in the first place? People just dont seem to understand that I want to live a lifestyle that doesn't require me to be chained to a desk 9-5. They tell me that I'm "looking at it in the wrong way."

Frankly, I don't think there is any other way to look at the 9-5 lifestyle in the US.

Your product is more or less exactly what I've been looking for. I want to be a vagabond.




Hi there! I think I somehow ran across your website while reading a thread on the IMDB message board for Forbidden Kingdom. I'm an American born Chinese guy and I studied abroad in  Hong Kong last year (my first time going) and I also noticed all the things you've been saying. I'm about to finish college and I'd also like to do some travelling, but the biggest issue I have right now is finding the right job. I'm not like those smart guys who know a billion different languages, and I'm not an engineer... so would it be difficult to find work in other countries? I'm an art student (yeah I know... not very Asian) and I want to work in photography and film, but especially in Europe I would imagine they have plenty of talented people and an unexperienced fresh out of school artist from the US wouldn't be in much demand. What do you think?

By the way, what kind of work do you do and where are you living now? Talk to you soon!

-Ken (currently in California, where there are lots of white girls who aren't dating Asian guys)



Your observations about white women in America are right on. Here's another wrinkle on that topic for you to ponder. I'm a white guy from the Midwest in middle years. My preference in women has always been Asian, having lived in and traveled throughout the Pac Rim while still in my twenties. (I lived in Europe, too, but Asians really do it for me.) In the late 1980s I lived in Columbia, Missouri a college town in heart of the country. I currently make my living as a freelance writer but in those days I was still honing my craft. Columbia was a better deal for me than either St. Louis or Kansas City, since as a university town it was both cheap and reasonably civilized.


I had a girlfriend named Tu Chung Su, a masters degree candidate in theater arts from Taipai. She, and I were pretty bohemian by the standards of the Bible Belt, and as such hung out at one of the few saloons in town that catered to that crowd. My relationship with Chung Su stirred up a lot of malice among the allegedly "cool chicks" inhabiting the bar. One evening I went down there alone, and was immediately confronted by one of them. "So, where's Yoko Ono?" this empty-headed sow inquired. I thought for a moment, then replied: "Does that make me John Lennon?" The pinhead didn't get it, of course, and after giving me what I'm sure she considered an appopriately withering look, lost herself in the crowd. Why should a woman I barely knew give a damn about who I was going out with? The most obvious reason was racism, a problem alive and well here in Red State, MO. Reason Two (and this is actually the important point) was intimidation. The bottom line? However hard they work to convince you otherwise, white girls in America don't cut it and they know it. They're the creeps, not the males (with some exceptions) whom they spend so much time and effort persecuting.


How's old that expression go? - "The narcissist is always on shaky ground."


No shit,



   Hello Mr.Wu! I found your website by chance
googling the subject of lack of intellectual
curiosity in America.
  There is plenty of culture in the US outside of
NYC;places like San Francisco,L.A.,Washington,
Houston,Dallas,Minneapolis,Baltimore etc.
  I recently saw the movie"Barcelona".In one
scene a Spanish character states flatly that the US
has"absolutely no culture". Really? What about
all the classical composers,novelists,poets and
playwrights,paintersetc of international renown
that America has produced? This shows the mis-
conceptions that many Europeans have about America.
This is true of people all over the world;
they get distorted pictures of each other's
cultures.Certainly,many Europeans and other people
have great fun vacationing all over the US.
  No doubt there are Europeans and Asians who
wonder if it might be better living in the US.
  I wonder if there are any websites that are the
exact opposite of yours,saying hoow great it is
to live in America?
  I would love to visit Xingjiang province in
China,land of the Uighur Turks,near the Central
Asian republics of the former soviet Union.
  The Uighurs resent Chinese occupation of their
land,which they call Eastern Turkestan.
  I am very interested in Central Asia,and even
learned some Turkish and its Central Asian
dialects.I sometimes watch a UHF program called
"INside China",which is very interesting.
Sometimes they show life in cities such as Kashgar,
in Xingjiang,the westernmost city in China.
Fascinating!  I will continue to frequent your
very interesting website.


   Hello! Your blog is really interesting.
  I am not one of those stereotypically ignorant,
uncultured Americans.I am a classical musician
who has performed in Italy,Australia,Switzerland,
New Zealand,Fiji and Samoa,and performed in many
orchestras,opera companies,and other groups.
  I am very interested in history and geography,
and know a great deal about other countries.
I can read or understand,if not speak,many European
languages fluently.
  I have been giving classes in the appreciation
of classical music at United Cerebral Palsy on
Long Island,and a nursing home in Westchester
county,and was a substitute music teacher at
various Long Island schools.
   It's true that many Americans are pathetically
ignorant of history,geography and other countries in
general.But not all.And we are not all cultural
ignoramuses.For example,opera is more popular
than ever in the US,and there are now more opera
companies here than in Germany! We also have many
world class symphony orchestras,great museums,
and colleges and Universities.The US government
has done many reprehensible things,but so have
governments everywhere.It's ridiculous to blame
America for ALL the world's problems.
  I don't think it's fair to make all those
generalizations about the American people.
  They are no worse overall than people anywhere.
Nor is the architecture that uniformly bad.
  There are still many very attractive and
livable cities here.
  I wiould like to visit many other countries,
though,particularly in Europe and the former
Soviet Union.
  New York city is a wonderful place to visit
and has so much to offer;ditto San Francisco,
Boston,Washington and other cities.
  It may be true that other countries are great
places to live,but I would'nt write off the US.




Hello Winston

First I want to say being another Asian American male that I have found your travels very informative and inspiring. I am glad that you have shared your experiences with us. I actually agree with alot of your insights that America has become very work centered, cliquish, socially isolating, etc.

Second, I know you only spend two weeks in the Ukraine but I was wanting to know if you knew the cheapest way to get there? I looked at some flights and they all cost about 1000 USD. Do you happen to know any cheaper deals or good airlines? Do you know when the peak flying season is? Any advice would be greatly appreciated from one fellow Asian American male to the other

Thanks again




“I love Winston because he has helped open my eyes as to how we as women, in the US are treating men unfairly. Perhaps it is time for us women to quit whining and start seeing that perhaps men are treated unfairly and with the disrespect we once endured. I would prefer to see us women start treating men nicely again, so they do not all run abroad and leave us alone in the dust. Thank you for your refresing honesty and eye-openers Winston.”




Hey Winston, thought you might be interested in this.  An old friend from college sent me this - and she's a very attractive girl, for your information - and it surprised me because it sounds exactly like something I remember you writing.  Just that it's from the perspective of a hot girl:

"L.A. feels pretty boring to me, but then again, i definitely do not get out much right now that i'm in school and working all the time... when i do go out though, it doesn't seem to be very social... like, people usually stay with their friends, and as girls, we're trained to think that any guy that comes up to you in a bar or club is either a) a creep, or b) desperate.... it's odd that we think that way, but it's the culture... so where are you supposed to meet people?

another reason i think people are so uninteresting here in the States, is because of the whole politically correct thing... it has a huge effect on what people will allow themselves to express, and as a result think... it's like we're too civilized or something... so people become breathing versions of their environment, American society: conventional, washed-out, literal, pedestrian, square, colorless, mundane, and uninteresting... always looking to the future, and never living in the moment.. and if you do live in the moment, you somehow feel guilty... it's so sad to see it so clearly when you come back from being abroad for a while...

Machismo is repulsive, but what's attractive is guys who are guys... and that inevitably involves some raw, uncooked, unrefined, aggressive characteristics... maybe the problem isn't that guys here aren't these things, but that women are mentally trained to be repulsed by it... and when we go to other countries, we automatically sort of drop all of our expectations about how "our men" are supposed to be (because they're not our men) and we "allow" it ... and when you guys go to other countries, the women don't have the same expectations that american women do, and you find it more liberating and interesting to be with them, like they just allow you to be guys... i don't know, all i know is that i can't wait until spring break when i can go on another vacation...





Hi Winston I can 100 percent relate to your last article. About how the United States and be a very isolating place. Now is it because of the way things are socially economically structured. Over the past few decades started with the Reagan non mics of the 1980,s, Dose it go back to the old Puritan Calvinistic work ethics over 400 years ago. Do the different powers at be. Use fear to have the upper hand. As  far as control over us. IE by keeping people more isolated alienated. It give more power to the different powers at be. By keeping people alienated from them self and others it creates more social problems. Like crime  especially violent crime, More violent gangs, Extreme substance abuse alcoholism  harder drugs, And so many other pathology's. However all the pathology's create more jobs at many different levels. More police more privet security company's. The courts the lawyers the judges. The court clerks that handle all the paperwork. The prison system. Allot of the prisons in the USA are now becoming privatized. The company's that supply the food and clothing to the prison. Company's that manufacture and sell security equipments at all levels. Not to mention the medical field. When people feel alienated they are much more likely to use tobacco products. Like cigarettes chewing tobacco.  Smoke real heavy. Also have real bad diets. Like fast  food. Or replacing an apple a banana or a carrot with a snickers bar or a bag of chips. Plus all the other health issues associated with the high stress and frustration of alienation.  So  in a nut shell. All these things make billions and billions of dollars. The way the cooperate America sees things. Something that creates distress and hardships, pain, makes big money. Things that create fulfillment happiness togetherness. Dons,t make money and will cost money.  Also fear is used by almost all the commercials you see on TV your computer the magazines. If you don,t buy this product your not going to fit in and you are a total  freak. Then you see the news. This person got stabbed. Three women got raped  murdered and mutilated last night. The person that did this is still at large. People in the United State are hit with millions and millions of bits of this information everyday. When they get up in the morning and leave for work. At work on there way home from work. Just going out on the town. At home  when you turn on your TV or boot up to your web server. I personally feel the whole things feeds on it,s self and is it,s own kind of demonic entity. You do wonderful work Winston. Keep up the good work. {{{{PEACE}}}}




Hi, you dont know me, just wanted to say I was impressed by your

website on happier abroad.  I especially enjoyed reading your blogs about the

phoney consumer culture of America. I couldn't agree with you more and

 you took the words right out of my mouth.






Hello Winston,


I wanted to thank you for giving me hope.


My name is David, I'm from San Diego and now living in Las Vegas, I

 Think I'm a fairly good looking guy, an intellectual, and I'm fairly

 successful, and still I have an impossible time trying to meet girls.


I have the money to go anywhere I want to go, and live there, as long

 as I have the Internet I can make money.


You have inspired me to take a trip to Russia, see for myself if there

 Is any truth whatsoever to what you say about Russian girls, even if what you say is even 10% true I'll be very happy.


I want to also thank you for being able to read what you said in such

 An intelligent, honest, and direct manner, it was very refreshing to say

 The least.


This coming summer 2008 I will go to Russia and see for myself what

 it's like there, and I hope it's even 10% of what you say it is, even being able to talk with such pretty girls would make me feel better about



I wish you the best in this life Winston, I hope you are doing well.


Take care,






This is what I figured out about most of the Americans I have met after living in the States for over 8 years  (note: most, but not all of them, there are definitely very smart people here who became my friends, I am talking about the biggest population percentage):


Fake.... that's the first thing that I noticed and continue to hate to this day.  Famous American smile, everybody smiling at each other, in the stores, on the streets, restaurants, at work.  And while smiling and pretending to like you and being your friend, they quitely stab a knife in your back (still smiling, of course).


Close-minded....  all those things they say and think about other cultures and countries, while having hard time pointing out where Luxembourg is or asking if I drive to Russia and back (yes, driving... as in a car) while visiting my family there.  Or stating that French people are greedy and stink, literally, while never visting France or knowing where Statue of Liberty came from or even meeting a French person in their life.


Ignorant... thinking that their culture/religion/Constitution are the only right way to live, while never experiencing anything else, seeing other countries, or, for that matter, not even being able to name any constitutional rights exept for one...  right to bear arms... for some reason, everybody knows this one.


Confused....  thinking that their country is the one that can rule the world, yet making fun of their president and displaying "Bush hater" stickers on their car bumpers.


Confused again... eating McDonalds five times a week and thinking that Diet Pepsi will save them from being overweight.


Umm...  stupid???  for suing a fast-food place for becoming overweight...  winning the case is something I am not even sure what to call...


Living in absolute ignorance about anything that concerns any other country besides their own...  for example, actual questions and comments I've heard about Russia: "Must be nice to be away from all that snow, huh?", "Do you guys still have to stand two hours in line to buy toilet paper?", "Do you have polar bears walking around Moscow?", "Do Russian women ever shave their legs?".


Living in ignorance about their own country, for that matter...  when asked what Americans were in Iraq for, one of the answers I heard (on TV, mind you), was "well, 9/11, of course". 

Should I go on???




Hi Winston,
Thanks very much for your reply from several months back. I enjoy your writing and you are one of the most inspiring dudes around. Main thing is you don't give a shit what other people (especially white) say about you - highly unusual, unfortunately, for any race of people, Chinese especially.

So your stuff is absolutely awesome.

My brother is planning a trip soon to Europe. He wants to go through Turkey and then through Bulgaria, Romania, Hungary and onto Western Euro.

Do you know much about these three countries, in terms of the women scene, friendliness or unfriendliness of the locals, crime, safety etc.

My brother is 36 and feels it is time to begin to enjoy some of life, especially in the women department.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Keep up the great work.


Kind regards,



I'm very pleased to read about you breaking out FREE of the American middleclass lifestyle of "I owe, I owe, I owe so off to work I go". CONGRATULATIONS and GOOD LUCK! Ciao for now, Bill



I found your site quite by accident. I was just so fed up with the sour grapes of American feminists about American men finding love and romance overseas and so stunned with their arrogant explanations for it:(they just want to find defenseless women to abuse). I was stunned because it's

 such typical American female behavior----blame everyone and everything else but yourself. It couldn't possibly be you----you're too perfect! So I decided to research the topic on the internet and a link to your website about Russian women appeared. I believe the full title read: Russian Women Are NOT Desperate To Leave Their Country. I read the article with great interest.

After that, I decided to search your name on the internet and discovered even more links to even more great articles. Keep up the good work Winston.



dear winston:


you are so right. your words really mean a lot to me here.


i've been feeling exactly that.


this is why, no matter how much money i am making in sales, i've noticed i simply work LESS and LESS. this is because i'd rather be watching a movie or reading a book on film, acting, screenwriting, etc.


i tell everyone, "if life is just about working to survive, as far as i'm concerned, my life is OVER. if there is no dream to live for, if i am NOT living for my dream, there is no life, no purpose. i'd rather be a poor starving screenwriter, than making millions doing finance or something i could care less about. my father is 70 years old. i'd rather spend the next 10 years having quality time with him and figuring the money out later, than flushing my years down the toilet NOW, trying to work 80 hours a week, for nothing! -just to go from the day to day. that's simply NOT me."


i've been in a state of depression, but it's leading me to the new spiritual re-birth you described. i'm supposed to be an artist. an actress. a writer. NOT a sales girl. NOT working in the corporate world. that's not me. and i feel i am withering on the vine every single day i have to do it.


about the cd: at the gym with my walkman, i managed to access SOME of the rest of the numbers, though not all. i looked online and a brand new cd, with shipping, is only about 10 bucks. i may just purchase a new one.


nevertheless, the stuff you recommend, winston, has always managed to utterly CHANGE MY LIFE. thank you for being an inspiration. you will never know how much it means to me!!!


love always, elizabeth






Hello Winston. My name is Joe and I'm from New York. I've enjoyed reading your articles, especially the ones about how worthless, shallow, superficial and spoiled American women are and how the American culture and the American legal system tolerate it, and even condone it!  I'm curious about a few things: I agree that America is not all things to all people and for me the bad outweighs the good. I'm wondering if you wouldn't mind being a resource for information about overseas living. Specifically what countries are the most male friendly? How easy is it to find a job and earn money in certain countries? What countries have a low cost of living? Are there counties with living standards similar to the U.S.? and finally: Is it really possible to escape the U.S. completely? Doesn't the U.S. have a global influence and a global presence? Since the U.S. has imposed itself militarily and economically and raped and plundered foreign lands, isn't it just a matter of time before it starts to impose itself culturally and socially? and isn't it just a matter of time before feminism gets exported? Are the rest of the world's women innoculated against feminist filth? I believe American women will do either one of two things: they'll either try to stop men from going overseas to meet foreign women by passing laws like IMBRA. Or if that doesn't work out as planned, they'll simply try to indoctrinate the rest of the world's women and brainwash them into perceiving themselves as "victims" and adopting victim politics. I believe this is what American feminists are secretly planning! Is there any way it can be thwarted. American feminists love to hide behind a false facade by pretending to "defend the rights of oppressed women".  But in reality it's just a smoke screen to obscure their real intentions which are much more sinister. Their goal is to proclaim their superiority over men, deprive men of all their rights, confiscate all their money, steal all their property and ultimately rule over them. Since it's difficult for most women to accomplish their objectives with aggression, they seek to distract their opponent with BS----otherwise known as feminism. So when you hear a feminist feign concern for oppressed women don't be so quick to sympathize. There's a hidden agenda behind her words of compassion. Feminists are not genuine or sincere. They're selfish phonies who'll say anything to get their way.  And by the way Winston, I'll bet if American feminism is ever exported, foreign women will be just as vulnerable and just as easy to convert as American women due to the have-it-all, have-it-your-way message of feminism-----very tempting, very seductive, and very hard to resist.  Thanks for reading my message Winston. Hope to hear back from you. Take care.



Dear Winston:


I have never responded to a blog before or whatever they are called.  I found your essay about american consumerism on planet essay and was inspired to write to you.


As I read your essay I felt like you were telling my story, except that I am a 40 year old female living in Malibu with a husband and two kids.  Sounds nice right?   Many days I feel like I am living a life of a prisoner.  In my twenties I lived in Italy, France, and Belguim.  I have been to Switzerland, Austria, Germany, spain, Turkey, Russia, Indonesia, and Luxembourg. I felt so alive, so free.  Now what?  My life is exactly like you described in your essay.  I feel stuck.  I am a full time mom with a nanny to help.  I have read every spiritual book out.  All I seem to do is long for my twenties.  My husband is all about materialism and staying at 5 star hotels (many days I just feel suffocated by our marriage).  I long for the way I used to be.  I feel as though I have gone to the point of no return because I have children who rely on me.


Do you have any advice? 





Wu-man, I got to give it to you. You have surrounded yourself by

everymans passion. Hundreds of beautiful women. All thru history men have

surrounded themselves and fought over the presence of women. Could there

be any better reason to fight over. For what ever reason you have

accomplished that feat. You have surrounded yourself by beautiful

women. The funny thing is that most of those guys living in the

Philippines will never experience what you are doing. I have traveled

the world during my long military career and have surrounded myself by

beautiful women in every port I went too. There is no better feeling

then to be surrounded by good-looking, good-smelling, good-tasting

women. But alas Mr Wu, we all seek that ONE perfect women who rises above

the rest and glows with the intensity of the North Star. You have yet to

experience that moment. When my time comes to move to Cebu, I intend to

stop and smell the roses. All the roses. Each one I smell better then the

one before. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and filipina women are

some of the most desired women on the planet. I enjoy their presence and

their passion for life. LJG FMF Forever. P.S. I believe that you can

prove your point anytime.



Dear Winston,


If so many immigrants feel this way about Americans, why do they show us such a false, ingratiating face when they meet us, and pretend to love us so?  There are some Americans, like myself, a Portuguese-American, who feel exactly the same way many foreigners do about this dead, soulless country.  When we meet non-Americans who share our feelings, we are never let know it.  We have no one to talk to about our views.  It's as though all Americans are stereotyped as exactly the same: we're all dead inside, we all have dead eyes, we all march in lockstep behind our belligerent, hate-filled, racist nation.  "Therefore why even talk to them?  They're all subhumans and they're all together and in on it."  But that's profoundly untrue.  Not all of us march in time to America's sick rhythm.


As an American who noticed the strange dead eyes of most other Americans early in my life, as a child, I feel very bad that more non-Americans I have known did not simply open up a conversation with me about how they felt.  They would have been amazed to learn that some Americans also feel the way they do about America; and we, the minority, are trapped here


My sister and I are two of about perhaps ten people we know who can see through the fog of deadness hovering over this country.  Life for us as native-born Americans has been a steady hell.  From childhood it is as though "normal Americans" could perceive our differentness.  We were hunted, bullied, tortured, lied about and betrayed for our perception.  My suffering as an American outsider has lasted for decades.  Again and again I find myself encountering Americans who find it routine and okay to lie to me, lie about me, steal from me, betray me, try to manipulate me, use me, and discard me.  There is no soul behind their eyes; their eyes are empty and blank, and all they care about all their bellies, their wallets, and the next (must be wealthy, thin and attractive!) sex partner. 


If I could, I would leave America.  I long to go to Portugal, the land of my ancestors.  But right now I am trapped under a business that I built and can see no way of continuing it in another country: yet.  If I hit upon an idea, I will be out of here and living across the world far away from this terrible land.  Between Bush, Christians, the war in Iraq, the growing fascism, the media and the worsening inhumanity in the very streets here, I despise and feel sorry for this place.


America is very much an asylum for the mentally ill.  My sister and I ask each other every week - literally, every week, in the wake of yet another betrayal or assault from a dead-eyed American near us - if the entire country has gone collectively insane.


You wonder why Americans don't know their own neighbors?  They're more Americans - would YOU want to get to know them?


Portuguese-American longing to escape,




Mabuhay from Boracay! Hey Winston, noticed your post for the first time on the philippines yahoogroups and have skimmed over your bio and a few of your links long enough to realize, "the path to adventure" continues with the next generation. I often use one liners to simplify what I mean to say and to save me from typing and you have a few one liners, I like, "energy leeches"& the "USA MATRIX" being two of them.

Know exactly what you mean and I left home at 18 back in 1972, lived in Tucson, then on a sailboat in the Florida Keys before heading for Europe Jan 77 and have never spent a consecutive 12 month period in the States since then, the two longest stays were 9 months in 82 /83 in San Diego and 11 months in 86 / 87 in my hometown, Des Moines, Iowa.

I'm particularly impressed that you have followed your unconventional, adventurous path as an Asian American who like you say are more often than not very practical, hardworking and caught up with the "American Dream" of materialism. My internet names are AsiaBill and PhilBill so it's easy to find my blah blah blah with google. KEEP THE FAITH, ciao for now, Bill


Feel FREE to ask questions about life and travel in the Philippines, about our Boracay Beachfront resort, Casa Camilla or our guesthouse style Townhouse Hotel near the Manila Airports? Tel.++(632)-854-1435, 854-3826, 854-0161 Cell-0918-283-7251



Wow....agreed, why can't normal looking people go counter-culture as well??  I agree with you on a lot of this.  That "burning man" thing you were talking about...desiring to find politically active, culturally aware, industry averse, normal individuals is extremely difficult!  I have a few amazing friends at my school who are this way (and are even clean-shaven and pot free) and it's a relief.  It disturbs me, in a way, that I am expected to accept (and even desire??) the pot culture if I want to go against the grain at all.  Associating with some of these individuals...makes me feel as if they really don't care about any causes, only having an excuse to be lazy, neglect themselves and smoke pot.  I think I've found a haven in my International Studies major at school.  My professors are open-minded, organic/vegetarian/holistical health-minded, aware of politics, culture, and society...and so are the students!  But I would say that this is certainly an exception to the rule, rather than the rule itself (and you often display).  Still, even at times, I find myself to be an anomaly...not desiring to take drugs, being vegetarian, caring for politics...I don't belong here!  Like you, I feel the need to get out.  As for the whole girls thing...besides my few exceptions of friends...most of the girls I know just aren't that passionate and wild in the way I think you are talking about.  And like you said, many will choose the white males over anyone else!  I don't mean to sound crass, but the world offers up many exotic flavors, and I don't understand why these girls can't try some of them??  My boyfriend is Japanese, there's a very attractive Iraqi sitting next to me, a cute Korean guy behind me, etc.  I wish these girls would their minds!  If they're open enough to try pot, etc., why not try "new flavors" in other areas too?  (Again, excuse my crudeness--I use this more of an analogy than anything). 

So, just to show you there are some sane people in America, I included a picture of myself, hahahaahaha :).  I'm a normal looking, clean and nice-smelling, in-shape American girl who is culturally and politically and environmentally aware.  I am a vegetarian, try to buy local and organic as much as possible, care (even worry excessively) about national and international issues in health, politics, human rights, etc....  I have many international friends, have a (native) Japanese boyfriend, love travelling and learning about new cultures....can actually locate Kazakhstan (although that's kind of an easy one), Malaysia, etc. on a map and...I've never even SEEN pot, let alone smoked it.  :) there hope?  Probably not much, but at least there are some people out there suffering from the same problems and feeling the same way as you!!  :D

Take care Winston,


PS--did you ever decide about the paternity test?

PSS--(sorry if sending my pic weirded you out.  Please just keep it to yourself, haha!  I don't like my face to be seen...I'm kind of private in that way)
PSSS--i didn't read my email a second time.  hope i didn't write anything too weird!  Haha


Hi all,

My name is Edward Kingsley. I have been reading the stories and adventures of Winston, and like the rest of you I'M IMPRESSED!!!

I will be leaving this cold country in the near future. First stop: BRAZIL
I will be making a web log of my travels so others can follow in my footsteps. However, I bow humbly to the master, Winston Woo.

I hope I am striking out on a BOLD and NEW path for my life such as Winston did. Though some of his writings were embrassing to say the least, I love how he persavered and finally got the girl of his dreams. WAY TO GO WINSTON..... Now he and Diane will live happyily ever after, as soul mates that they truly are. I hope you two get married soon, and have more kids. You will like being a father Winston, it's responsibility on a whole new level and I venture to say you will love it.






Hi Winston,


I was just talking to someone in the newsroom where I work about his trip to Eastern Europe. He mentions that even though the people are poor, they are exceedingly happier than people in the U.S. and that he had to "shut off the sarcasm filter" because he was so floored by their hospitality, kindness, genuity, and innocence. He mentioned that the pace of life was slower and that unlike the U.S., which is task-oriented and focused on time and quality of life materially, they were focused on quality of life socially, and that there was an interconnectedness and contentedness that is missing from the U.S. There wasn't that additional layer of superficiality and deception/mask/distance that you have to deal with in social interactions in the U.S.


Ahhh.... I am dying here. Please advise me as to options about what to do. I do want to make a difference in the world and I fear that if I just move to these countries right away, I might give up educational and vocational opportunities that would better equip me to pursue my dreams. On the other hand, my personality type is so at odds with this mainstream society that it has put me into major depression and frustrating sense of isolation and not being able to achieve fulfillment or contentedness. I can't help feeling like I am wasting my life. I deserve a life where I can be free to be who I am-- where I can hang out with people I sincerely am amplified by.... hike waterfalls, forests, play music with.... and that doesn't really seem to be the way of life here.


HELP. What do you advise I do? What options do I have? Are there artistic communities in Europe or elsewhere that you would recommend I join????





Posted: 15 Sep 2007 06:29 pm    Post subject: I Love Wu Cause He's A Rebel



Maybe it's because I'm a young man who is the leader of a power metal band, but I love rebels and free spirits, I really do. And that's why I like Wu so much.

There are so many people who turn into depressed potatoes in the USA. They just sit there and get more and more depressed. And if you don't fit in, they just label you a "loser".
Wu didn't just sit down and take that. Wu rebelled against that.

I rebel against that too in many ways, with my band, and with going to Poland, and with other stuff.

But now I want to go to the Philippines just like Wu. Yeah!
Let's go Wu! Let's go Wu!! Let's go Wu!!!!!!!!!!
Beat those bashers!!! Beat those Wu-Bashers!!!!

Win--ston Win--ston Win--ston Win--ston!!!!!!!!

Winston is the man because he rebels against American culture and goes down to the Philippines to sleep with all the gorgeous bar-girls. And that's what I'm going to do, too.



jamesbond wrote:

In America there is the mentality that we don't talk to strangers and some people don't even talk to their neighbors! How are you supposed to meet people when it's taboo to talk to strangers? I guess the bars and nightclubs are the only socially acceptable places to talk to strangers! That really limits your opportunities to meet people. No wonder why so many people are using the personal ads and internet dating! People even avoid making eye contact with others when out in public!

- Paul

This also calls to mind the workplace. This is more or less a 'safe' place to hold social discourse.

The US appears to hold individuality so dear that it has produced possibly the most bland 'individuals' of all cultures, bi-polar patients aside perhaps, which there seems to be no end of now. It would appear the true life of the person cannot be found in isolation, rather it blooms in a more collective mentality. No surprise, it's difficult to cultivate a complex mentality when all you're exposed to is the same people, friends, situations, roads, jobs, etc or worse, left in isolation. I have always found my friends from other countries to be far more informed and colorful as people, men and women both and far more altruistic and 'other oriented' than the people I've known in the US.

Strangest thing is, the people I've known from politically torn and bomb ridden countrysides are far less paranoid than people from the States and far more outgoing. Then again, people from safer countries than the US, which are many, are also less paranoid and more outgoing. Go figure.



Subject: Greetings from Washington, D.C.



Hello Winston,


I visited your website,, and I agree with everything

 you write. You are my hero! You have spoken truths that many men do not

 understand. You have broken ground that many men have not.


I am a Korean American and I have struggled so much. You are an



Cheers, Mark



Dear Winston,


I just read through some excerpts from your eBook and the more I read, the angrier I became. Not because of my disagreement with your opinions but with the fact that you are correct in about 90% of your theories. I am a 100% born and bread American from Northern California and I see the “closed society” you are discussing in your book. We never used to be this way, in the 1960’s, 70’s and 80’s we embraced a “one world” love and traveled much more than we do today. But I think I know the “turning point” to the American culture, in the late 80’s early 90’s we all got cable TV.


Now I know what you are going to say, what does Cable TV have to do with anything? Instantly, average Americans became aware of events and things outside their local area and the media started showing nothing but “Bad News”, “Horrible Tragedies”, “Hurricanes & Earthquakes”, “Famine”, “Muggings”, “Car Jackings”, “Terrible Wars”, “COPS TV Show” etc. all in the name of good broadcasting and people became afraid of strangers, the unknown and new places and people. It is my belief that the Average Americans never see the 99% of good things, good events, good people, etc. that happen outside their town or city; they only see the 1% of all the horrible things in this world.


I heard that a small town in a rural part of Kansas started locking their doors at night because robbers were breaking into urban projects in Atlanta ? Now there hasn’t been a “break in” in this rural part of Kansas in 20 years but people see bad things happen across the country and they think it is right next door. People don’t let children play in their front yards anymore, because “sexual predators” are lurking around every corner, I believe the odds of a stranger, (not a divorced mom or dad) swiping a kid out of his/her own front yard is smaller than getting hit by lightning twice. But people see it on CNN, ABC, FOX etc. and they think it will happen to them.


I am ashamed to say, the stupidity of our general public can sometimes be awe inspiring, but I believe it all comes down to a “young and innocent” society that has not had centuries of conflict and just life in general. Educated Europeans, Russians & Asians, all have centuries of history that they are brought up with and have learned from the past, and that they understand that life goes on, and don’t sweat the little things, we really don’t have much of a past and lots of times we just sit in our homes with the covers pulled up to our eyes and are afraid to get out of bed and experience a bit of adventure.


I have noticed that since the internet has evolved, different opinions, opposition views, new thoughts and freshness to views have been coming out. Our eyes are …..SLOWLY…..starting to open and it may be another 10 years till we become a true “part of the rest of the world” country. It’s just going to take us some time.


In my opinion, America is the land of innovative opportunity in business because we can control it and it’s safe, but non-controllable, adventurous things like love, social aspects, dating, personal worth and just knowing what it is to be a good human…….well, we’re still working on that.


Best Regards,





Subject:            Read Your E-Book!

Date:    Thu, 16 Aug 2007 10:05:23 -0500


hi winston my name is pacsun (pocksun) and I have to say, I'm impressed

 with your book and the pictures as well. I'm just like you man. always

 thought it was me but it wasn't. spent years trying to make myself over. I was the

 nerd in school but now I'm a stud but american women still can;t see me. I'm

 even more invisible now and I made myself over. want to take a look at how I

 look go to


I start reading this site called no marriage last summer I never ever

thought about going abroad to get a date. I've been reading more sites

 like yours than ever before this year and my friend I want to take the



my destinations I want to go to are:


1. colombia

2. mexico

3. brazil

4. russia

5. germany


I love latin culture always did. I have to go but thanks for writing that book. you really nailed everything about american 'culture" and foreign women. you saved my life.





Sent: Mon, 13 Aug 2007 8:22 am
Subject: You are AWESOME!


Dear sir,

You have made me extremely happy today. I too live in California and am of Asian descent. For my entire life, I have been socially awkward and rejected in school and other areas. Although I do have a lot of friends, I've always seemed to notice that my social skills differed from the "norm". I've always seen myself as outgoing, funny and nice but when I tend to over do it at times and thus lose friends and respect. I've always thought that I was the only person like this but when I found your site and read about your experiences, it described me exactly and now I know that I do not have to conform to American society. Throughout my past 3 years in High School, I've been changing almost every bit of myself in hopes of becoming popular again and having friends, but to no avail. Hopefully, I can become an expat and live in France or other part of Europe and enjoy the same success as you.

Thank you so much!



Subject:            Hello Winston!! Loved your site Man!!

Date:    Sat, 11 Aug 2007 07:08:47 +0000



Wow! Just awesome.


I was just thinking how true is the stuff you write and myself have

 been to Europe a couple of times have never gone to Eastern Europe before!! Now

 it's my mission! I have some friends made here in the USA and they live in



Also, I'm about to meet a couple of Girls from Khazakistan next month.

 Could you tell me whats the best way to telll a Russian Girl that you fancy

 her and that you are into her and want to be close??



Listen, you're the Man!





Subject:            Like your website



Hey guy i just got turned on to your web site and was finding it fascinating, but unfortunately i have to go and conform for the next 8 hours so i look forward to when my conforming session is over and i can get back to enhance my intellectual being.  i always wondered why i just didn't seem to get what the hell was going on with everyone around me.  terry



Subject:            Happier Abroad


Mr. Wu,


Sir, first off, let me tell you in one word what I thought of your e-book...OUTSTANDING!!!!!!!!!!  I'm currently reading it right now and it is great!!!


A little background about myself...I'm retired from the US Air Force and currently working for the government...however, I'm counting down the days till I can leave the rat race and head overseas to The Philippines to live there permanently.  My only problem is where do I want to settle down...I've narrowed it to either the Luzon province (specifically Angeles City or Subic Bay) or to Cebu.  I still have a few more years to go till I hit the minimum retirement age for civil service, but it's knowing what is waiting for me that keeps me going at work (I'm sure you understand what I'm trying to say about the mystique the Philippines provides!!).


I've been to the Philippines and Thailand 14 times (it helped being stationed in South Korea, haha) and when I come back to work and explain my vacation to my co-workers, I get nothing but blank stares...if they only knew.  Some friends of mine have never left New York State (except for the occasional trip to Canada), and it's harder to explain to them.


Oh, almost forgot, CONGRATULATIONS to you and Dianne...I wish nothing but the best for the both of you (and your baby when it arrives)!!!!


Sir, once again, thanks for taking the time to write the book and I'm looking forward to finish reading it in the next couple of days.


Respectfully Sent,





Subject:            thanks!

Date:    Wed, 08 Aug 2007 19:27:01 -0700


Thank you for your article, "The best solution to the Asian American man’s dating dilemma."  You took the words right out of my mouth and put it into writing.  I am no longer waiting for American society to change its views towards Asian men, and I have been planning to move abroad.  I have searched the Internet for at least a few years now for an article just like yours.  Thanks again.





Subject:            Hello Winston!! Loved your site Man!!

Date:    Sat, 11 Aug 2007 07:08:47 +0000



Wow! Just awesome.


I was just thinking how true is the stuff you write and myself have

 been to Europe a couple of times have never gone to Eastern Europe before!! Now

 it's my mission! I have some friends made here in the USA and they live in



Also, I'm about to meet a couple of Girls from Khazakistan next month.

 Could you tell me whats the best way to telll a Russian Girl that you fancy

 her and that you are into her and want to be close??


Listen, you're the Man!





Subject:            Like your website



Hey guy i just got turned on to your web site and was finding it fascianting, but unfornuatly i have to go and conform for the next 8 hours so i look forward to when my conforming session is over and i can get back to enhance my intelectual being.  i always wondered why i just didn't seem to get waht the hell was going on with everyone around me.  terry



Subject:            Happier Abroad


Mr. Wu,


Sir, first off, let me tell you in one word what I thought of your e-book...OUTSTANDING!!!!!!!!!!  I'm currently reading it right now and it is great!!!


A little background about myself...I'm retired from the US Air Force and currently working for the government...however, I'm counting down the days till I can leave the rat race and head overseas to The Philippines to live there permanently.  My only problem is where do I want to settle down...I've narrowed it to either the Luzon province (specifically Angeles City or Subic Bay) or to Cebu.  I still have a few more years to go till I hit the minimum retirement age for civil service, but it's knowing what is waiting for me that keeps me going at work (I'm sure you understand what I'm trying to say about the mystique the Philippines provides!!).


I've been to the Philippines and Thailand 14 times (it helped being stationed in South Korea, haha) and when I come back to work and explain my vacation to my co-workers, I get nothing but blank stares...if they only knew.  Some friends of mine have never left New York State (except for the occasional trip to Canada), and it's harder to explain to them.


Oh, almost forgot, CONGRATULATIONS to you and Dianne...I wish nothing but the best for the both of you (and your baby when it arrives)!!!!


Sir, once again, thanks for taking the time to write the book and I'm looking forward to finish reading it in the next couple of days.


Respectfully Sent,





Subject:            thanks!

Date:    Wed, 08 Aug 2007 19:27:01 -0700


Thank you for your article, "The best solution to the Asian American man’s dating dilemma."  You took the words right out of my mouth and put it into writing.  I am no longer waiting for American society to change its views towards Asian men, and I have been planning to move abroad.  I have searched the Internet for at least a few years now for an article just like yours.  Thanks again.





Hey Winston,

I'm around 6'1" and attractive by Asian standards.  What that meant was that I could usually find a girlfriend (Asian mostly) without too much trouble in the U.S.  On the other hand, I too still faced the discrimination that all Asian men are subject to.

I had white American girls yell "Ewwww!  Yuck!" to my face when I approached them at a club.  I could go on but I'm sure you get the point.

The reason I left the U.S. was because I found it to be a profoundly depressing and soulless existence living in North America.  I hate life in U.S. suburbs the most.  Cookie-cutter houses.  Endless strip malls filled with the same stores (Blockbuster, McDonalds, etc).  Having to drive EVERYWHERE.  Spending every night watching television or DVDs in my big, isolated house.  Weekends with nothing to do but go shopping at the mall.  Like many people, I always felt half-dead whenever I spent significant periods of time in the U.S.  I couldn't figure out why.  Then I realized it.  It was American culture.  It was the American media.  To put it bluntly, American culture is a ghetto culture that values flash over substance, superficial consumerism over spiritual growth. It's a culture that has an invisible racial hierarchy that places Asian men at the bottom and is obsessed with all things white or black American.  It's a country that is built for doing business, not living life.

Anyhow, I've lived in many places during my life.  And as we all know, each place has its good bits and its bad bits.

I've now learned to take the best bits of the U.S. (namely, service and business) and transfer it to my life abroad.





yup -- these guys are right on the money.  I flew to France after quitting a job in Silicon Valley...(where the women are absolutely terrible!)


I go to a French language school and take a class....I make 20 new friends overnight....I meet my future wife...I get married and now 2yrs STILL HAPPY!


I dont want to bunch all American girls into one big lump....BUT -- the majority of them due to culture or something act really snotty and stupid - like were not GOOD ENOUGH for them....and to be honest and not toot my horn - i was voted Prom King in Id hope to think that Im not THAT ugly at least...but i swear i went 12yrs in the bay area - and rarely found a girl who even batted an eye....and quite frankly i started to lower my own standards lower and lower....and for what?  The moment i traveled anywhere else - i found girls that would SINK any  american girl that ignored i have a wife that turns heads left and right - but she is staring right into my eyes with love.


Real love!


I think America has a cultural problem internally that is eating it alive...


Good luck man







Date: Fri, 20 Jul 2007 22:43:11 -0700 (PDT)
Subject: Re: almost overwhelmingly rejects my advice for Asian Men to date abroad


Again, not surprising.


There are vast numbers of Asian-American men who are mentally dysfunctional from their life of ostracism and sexual denial.  Instead of seeing the light, they'll claw at the messenger and attempt to silence the truth.  They're like that character from The Matrix, who after realizing that he has lived in a mental prison his entire life, actually wants to go back to its safe confines rather than face the harsh reality that lies before him.


Asian-American men face two choices:


1. They can admit that the US has an invisible hierarchy that places Asian men at the bottom of the sexual totem pole - which combined with the inferior mating qualities of American women and the fierce competition amongst eligible men - makes it highly unlikely they'll find quality dating lives in the US except by blind luck (e.g. running into a girlfriend in college and sticking with her no matter). 




2. They can pretend that the US is the greatest, happiest, and most wonderful nation in the world, a place that has the most beautiful women on earth who give each man an equal opportunity regardless of race or ethnicity.  If only they study hard enough, work hard enough, and improve themselves in every way, they'll get the American dream girl. 


Most Asian-American men will opt for a variation of option #2.  Quite a few will even go so far as say "I'm not attracted to white girls" (as a way to reject white women who they feel are going to reject them anyhow and because they think American "cows" = white women all over the world).


As you've no doubt realized, Asian-American men develop a variety of complexes, angst, and mental defense mechanisms to shield their egos from the brutal truth.



I think it's hot and surprising that any man from any culture is dominant.
There are so many men that are feminized and wimpy. What happened to old
fashioned roles and values? I am miserable because of all those bra burning
feminists that ruined things for my generation. I'd rather stay at home and
cook and take care of babies, and be married, then be a single struggling
mom trying to make it in this harsh world alone. No support. No love. It's
misery. Sheer, pure, misery. Put that down for all the American girls out
there. A nice dose of reality coming from your friend Kristy.

PS: Take care of Dianne and baby, and you. :)



Yes, please add me to your mailing list. :) I would love to read more about how you solved your "social problems", which are really America's social problems. Maybe some figures about how much it costs to live in various countries and a bit about immigration laws over in those countries. 
Your ebook was refreshing. I thought I was the only one who thought this way about American social climate. 



Subject:            Writing again....

To:        "Winston Wu"


Hi Winston,

It's Megan again.  I've been reading through your site some more and stumbled across the link about dating American Women.  In observing many of my friends, I must say you couldn't be more correct!  I felt like you were doing an in-depth personality analysis of one of the girls I've known since grade school (although admittedly, it wouldn't be all that in depth, now would it?)  Many of the women I have encountered are blunt, overly rude, and not at all feminine.  If they do act feminine at times, it is all a guise, in order to get a guy.  (Putting on a shorter skirt, wearing lots of makeup, flirting with her girlfriends).  There is nothing gentle about the American female persona. 

I used to work at a grocery store, as a clerk, and found this out the hard way!  There were many times that a very brusque woman would come through my line, talking rudely to me, making a show of herself, being rude and discourteous to her family and the people around her.  Typically this woman was overweight, judgmental, and had little to talk about other than herself.  I am always extremely turned off/thrown off by people like this.  In fact, I met a great number of them!  Those that had the "courtesy" to make "small talk" (as is sometimes appreciated since working in such a setting keeps one from having conversation with one's coworkers, or time to think alone), then that talk was hardly varied, and generally revolved around how either of the two of us were doing, or the weather. 

I digress...Like I said, the typical American woman you mentioned is a very accurate description.  While I hesitate to call her my friend, I will do so here for ease of letting my writing flow.  My friend often "throws people away," as you mentioned.  When she finds that they are not living up to her demands (being available for a drinking party at her house, etc.), she will give them the cold shoulder, allow them a "chance" to redeem themselves, and then, when they prove themselves "disloyal" again, she will cut off all contact.  I have seeny many mutual friends become alienated by her because of this.  She also typifies the American Girl in the way she acts/greets others/etc.  While quick to include anyone with potential of boosting her social status, or one who easily fits into her clique (where she will be revered as beautiful and wonderful and dear), she just as quickly excludes all who don't seem to fit her well.  (For example, she has stated many times that she hates my boyfriend because he is weird.  She plotted against a mutual friend of ours, my best friend, to break her heart and 'teach her a lesson.'  All for what?  Does she just get bored?!)

Her life revolves around partying, consuming mass amounts of alcohol and later, laughingly, telling stories (or lack thereof) about the previous night.  She buys spends all of her money on clothes, makeup, jewelry and shoes, and then wonders why she can't afford books for the semester, or a decent meal.  She spends her remaining money on alcohol and fast food, only to watch in horror as her body grows fat (and she cries out, focusing on that thing alone).  She is (excuse me for saying this), a cold-hearted bitch to men, using them until they aren't fun anymore.  It's impossible to have a deep conversation with her, as she states she "hates politics" and/or "doesn't want to think deeply because it hurts."  When she disagrees with something, she is very vocal about her stance, though her reasoning may be completely void of any logic.  She makes a point of being rude to the people she doesn't like, and then wonders why more people don't like her. 

Isn't it funny?  I just spent the last paragraph ranting about this old friend of mine, but it sounds like I could be describing the vast majority of American women today.  Lacking emotional depth and warmth, being narcissistic, and like you said, sociopathic.  (I think I just made that word up...)

My friend used to be very interested in traveling to France, but has changed in the last few years, and now hates to leave home even for a few weeks.  I don't understand what changed for her!!  All she wants to do is be close to her "friends," plenty of shopping, and alcohol.  Her life doesn't have any meaning beyond that. 

I seem to be getting quite good at sending emails in which I rant to you.  But it's so hard to resist--your website truly is a treasure!  It's making me more self-aware in areas that I may have been slipping into "typical American mode" in, and is opening my mind even more. 

Thanks for adding me to your mailing list.  As promised, here is the link to the website on which I found your website. (I posted in the forums, but this was probably a good 3 or 4 weeks ago, so I'm not sure if that post would be easy to find anymore).  The link to the post itself did not save correctly on my computer, or I would send you that.  However, if you care to, you can search under "white women dating asian men," (or some variant of).  my post is on the 4th and 5th pages, as simply, "m."  (Don't feel obligated to visit the site if you don't have time to or don't care to.)

Again, thanks for adding me!  I'll probably keep writing to you, as I can't seem to help myself, haha :).






Subject:            Great site but...

Date:    Fri, 27 Jul 2007 02:30:32 -0700


Your site is very cool. I spent hours on it as I just ran into it 

tonight and agree with it. But one thing puzzled me. What do you 

actually do? Does your website support all your continuing adventures 

now or do you have a "regular job" somewhere still?



Heya Winston

Nope, Cyrus is actually a persian name originally, but it's used sometimes in the south because it was mentioned in the bible and all that...

Sure, you can stick the letter on your site.

Well Winston, I'm basically still trying to figure you out. I don't know what it's like to be an asian male in this country, I'm inclined to believe that you were trying to have an active love-life in shallow, college-aged southern California without being a tanned white-skinned, blonde prep. I give you a lot of benefit of the doubt, because that situation would drive anybody crazy.

I think your dating woes in the states would have been alleviated if you changed your demographic (stopped going after the dingbats), and if you came on less strongly. Try joining a dancing class, or a more intellectual circle of book-readers or something. Learn some techniques on how to keep a girl laughing. You're obviously doing something right overseas, just bring that same confidence with you at a different venue then shallow clubs in CA!

So I've never been to Europe, but I do believe you are touching on the xenophobic, even subtly racist, tendencies in states like CA especially. I've met plenty of Europeans, and they're always more fascinating company by far. I talk about this issue on my blog at ... I mention your site on the 3rd update. I think the blog would make a great venue for discussion about this kind of stuff.

I think it's hard to meet friends, let alone women, by talking to people in stores or on the street. This is my big question, if this is an American tendency, or global behavior? I've heard so many different opinions that it's hard to put my finger on any one conclusion.

I do think you're right about how people here nail themselves into schedules of work, work, work and they forget how to live. I even think America has a serious drinking problem, too. I think people are so nervous around people that a constant supply of alcohol is required for anybody to work up the courage to face outsiders in a public setting!

Another problem is illiteracy... Americans are so fucking stupid! Why are people so disenchanted with intellectuality and substance? It's like the movie Ideocracy is coming true, where the lead character is repeatedly called a "fag" for talking in complete sentences.

It's these social problems that I think you're doing a fantastic job addressing in your book. But your experiences with women are too subjective, man. Even if you're completely right, a reader still wouldn't be able to identify if it's you or the country because nobody reading your e-book knows your personality or the techniques you use to meet people.

Finally, regarding feminism, you have to understand the USA is coming out of a very long period of racial and gender-based discrimination. A hundred years ago, a woman damn well better not think about leaving the kitchen and thinking for herself, which is why a few individuals might have extremist positions, but not everybody, and certainly no organizations have stated goals of lowering men below, and not equal, to women.




Subject:            I love what you are saying!



Hi Winston,


I recently found your website and agree with everything you have said.  American women are the most spoiled, unfriendly, unapproachable and anti-social women in the world!  I live in the Chicago area and the women here are just like you describe them on your website.  Even some of the fat and ugly girls have the attitude that men owe them something!!  It's hard to meet women when they are unapproachable and give off that vibe that says " don't approach me unless I already know you!"   American women are also very slutty.  I have a couple of jokes for you.  What's the difference between a Russian prostitute and an american women? The Russian prostitute charges for sex, the american women does it for free!   What does a European prostitute and an american women have in common?   They both have had the same amount of sex partners!


I would like to meet like minded guys who also agree with what you have been saying.  Maybe you could develop a group on the internet for guys who want to meet other guys who agree with with you say on your website.  I am 38 and live in the suburbs of Chicago.  Your right it's lonely living in suburban america where nobody talks to their neighbors!   Good luck in your future endevors!







Dear Winston,

Sure, go right ahead and post it. That's what I was hoping you would do.  I've been to the Philippines many times myself, in fact, I lived in Angeles for a year in 2002. I love the Filipino people in general and not just the women. I'm not ashamed to admit what I wrote because as far as I'm concerned it's actually worse then what I described. I know if I said this in front of the arrogant bitches I would be a chauvenistic pig.  Oh well!  Lets the chips fall where they may. Very few Americans, especially in major cities aren't plastic. If you want to see a real sight then go to LAX International and just sit and watch how people act. Everyone thinks that they are movie stars and that they are just too cool or hip. I know because when I travel to the PI I normally have about a 3.5 hour delay. They make me sick to my stomach but then I think, hey, this is just about par for these type of individuals. What people around the world don't understand is that America has been bankrupt since 1933 and everyone lives on IOU's or credit. Hell, our own money supply is funded by a private corporation known as the Federal Reserve and has nothing to do with the US Government. The truth of the matter is that the American people have been put up as collateral for the national debt by means of our future labor. Don't believe this?  Look at any bill, statement, government document or anything that has to do with commerce and see how your name is written.  You'll find it all written in all upper case letters representing a corporation in which is nothing more then an artificial person or a front. The upper case name is for legal purposes which are color of law, color of office, color of authority, all artificial. In fact the UCC (Uniform Commercial Code) was developed because of the fiat money system we have here. Since we have Federal Reserve Notes in which a note is a promise to pay and not actually money, they had to come up with a system to tie the artificial person with the artificial money supply. It's all smoke and mirror's and the majority of the people have the least clue as to what's really going on. I laugh when I hear that America is probably the richest nation on earth. Sure it is if you call credit being rich, owing and owing for the rest of your life and then passing it down to your next to kin. I could write 8 hours on whats going on and back every word of it up. It's all on the internet and all u have 2 do is search.  Later 4 now.




Subject:            Winston, you are 100% correct



Hey there Winston,

You probably don't remember me at all but I had a really long series of e-mail conversations with you a few years back. I don't think I used the same e-mail address though or I used an anonymous nickname at the time. I don't remember the exact year but it was probably around 2002 or 2003 when your website was a chronicle about all the problems you were encountering in Russia . I believe my initial responses to you were kind of critical in regards to your adventures in Russia and your motivations. Well, like you I am an Asian-American and I made the decision to live abroad in 2005. I haven't regretted it one bit and it has been a life changing (and saving) experience. It’s interesting and sort of funny to me that it seems you decided to live abroad roughly around the same time as I did. I always considered this option and deep down inside it’s what I was planning for in my life. I was far from being a “loser” in the U.S. , I was hired by a police dept and was going to work in law enforcement as a career. I fit the “type A” personality attributes pretty well because I’m fit, decent looking if not handsome, confident, outspoken, and I have managed my personal life well. However, I spent a couple weeks in the academy and realized that I could never become a cop. It wasn’t because I lacked the ability or the interest in police work it’s just that the motivation wasn’t there to “protect and serve” communities in the U.S. I had absolutely no interest in building a life in America and the people I was surrounded with just put all that into perspective.


After I quit the academy I felt fairly depressed because it was the first time I quit something major in my life. I felt like a failure for a couple years because I didn’t buckle down and go through with it despite my reservations. I even tried a couple more times to enter into law enforcement. This was done more to convince myself to fit into American society professionally rather than doing what I really wanted to do in my heart. It was only after I decided to put everything on hold for awhile and do some soul searching that I figured out what was really bothering me. It wasn’t me at all it WAS the society I was living in. I am just not materialistic or infatuated with conforming to the American ideal of what an American male should be or what constitutes the fabled “American ethic.” The whole idea repulses me and I feel a deep seeded disgust and aversion towards what many Americans stand for.  It’s too bad I didn’t figure this out for myself until much later.. all told I wasted a good 4-5 years from 2001 until 2005 with indecisions about my life. Those should have been the prime years of my life spent partying, socializing, laying down a career path, and just enjoying my youth but I am still young (29) and have been happily living abroad the past couple years.

Let's face it America is good for some things like making money, developing stable businesses, and enjoying the natural landscape however the standard of living is highly overrated and downright poor in many respects People in America are stressed, sexless, annoyed, and angry most of the time. You can see it in mainstream American culture, the macho bullshit posturing, the elitism, and the feminist nonsense. I know some people will deny this and call us "pathetic" for our choices but I know too many American expats from all walks of life who are happily living abroad to discount this as mere coincidence. The english speaking western world has really pigeonholed itself as a moralistic, productive, and order based society but I feel the more you order and categorize people's lives the less happy they are. I’m not even going to get into all the racial discrimination, social politics, and other nonsense that pervades every aspect of American life either. Let’s just say that I’m sure you know about as much as I do how bad it can be as an asian minority in the U.S. Actually, it’s not even a race thing these days. I find a lot of my friends from ALL racial backgrounds to express how sick and tired they are of the bullshit they face in daily American life. However, the vast majority of these guys will never leave. They just don’t have the options on the table because they set down responsibilities and roots that will not allow them that mobility. I feel for them, if only they knew..


Once you go abroad it’s difficult to go back. My first extended experience living overseas opened my eyes in a variety of ways. People will always be people but I believe that culture is the single biggest influence on people. There is definitely something wrong with America in this respect. America may be a lot of good things..productive, prosperous, and relatively free but the socialization of its citizens is much less advanced than other (much more economically poorer) countries I’ve been in. The way I look at it quality of life isn’t just all about money. It’s about what you can do with yourself in that society and how comfortable you feel around others. In America I was never truly “comfortable” but always felt tense or slightly agitated at the people around me. There’s definitely a hostility and tenseness to social interaction there that I don’t feel anywhere else. That’s a lot of negativity to deal with daily so it’s not surprising that out of all industrialized first world countries Americans generally have the least healthy lifestyles and shortest overall life spans.

Anyways, this e-mail ended up being a lot longer and more personal than I anticipated. Feel free to quote from this if you would like to. There are a lot of other observations I’d like to make including various countries I’ve traveled to in the past couple years but I’ll save that for another e-mail.


Also, Winston keep up the good work. I really feel you are one of the more intelligent and insightful individuals out there on the internet. I’m sure there are lots of American men of all backgrounds who agree with your articles. Ignore the naysayers and bitter Americans out there who want to bring you down to their level. Be yourself and be happy with life. Life is short and sometimes that’s all we can do is just be.

Not anonymous this time ;),




Subject: dude you are the MAN




Thanks for putting your site up. I haven't read it just seen your baby....


will read it thoroughly though.


Thank You Sir






Subject: Great stuff


Hey WInston,

just to let you know that you write great stuff. Your cultural observations are spot-on and fun to read. Should you ever look for a new exciting challenge, try China or Taiwan. I can't wait to read from you there. I have made my experiences there but would be curious to see what you write !

All in all great stuff, highly appreciated !




Subject: hi there from downunder



Hi Winston,
I'm Chinese born and raised in New Zealand. Have worked overseas and as a young chinese man, obviously the interracial dating disparity really hit home about 10 years ago. Its a perennial topic for discussion among Chinese guys like myself - and yes I agree with you 1000% - there is something really fucked up about the attitudes of not white people in general, but Anglo-Saxon societies in their attitude to Asian men. Even 100% non-sexual communication between white woman and asian man is often a fraught affair - however with foreign European women at work it is never a problem - whether they find my attractive or not is beside the point - they just treat you as another human being.

Thinking of doing an overseas trip through Asia and Europe; but I now have concerns about Russia - how big really is the skinhead problem there and are the dangers from these thugs exaggerated? There have been some shocking incidents that have made the news, but then only a couple of weeks ago an elderly white New Zealand tourist was found strangled to death near Moscow. So is it all racial or just general banditry? Love to hear your thoughts.

You are a champ. Most of us, even if we did find the holy grail would either be too selfish or more likely shy and embarrassed to ever come out publicly the way you have. Your generosity of spirit is truly amazing.

Keep up the good work and all the best for the future for you and your fiance Dianne.




Subject:  Awesome web site



Great web site,


Good job on spreading the word about angeles. I read all your stuff and I could not have said it better myself. Keep updating the site. It looks great. Glad to see you found happiness like I have.



Subject:  nice web site

Date:  Tue, 10 Jul 2007 17:55:19 -0700


Damn - you done a lot - i like what you have written and it's

 informative and helpful

i will be there in a month in AC so drop me a line if you would like to

 meet - drinks are on me (for one night anyhow) as we owe you for sharing all

 of your experiences


Thanks man - well done


Bubba (real name is Dan k)




Subject:  AC


Hi there! I read your site and wanted to say hi. I like your writing

style. Please forgive mine I tend to ramble :-)  You are obviously a

very intelligent individual with a good sense of the world and I like

your articles. I'm glad you have found true happiness, I hope I can do

the same.


 What is very interesting to me is that we have traveled many of the

same paths and ended up at the same location!  Ukraine, Russia to AC.

I was even engaged to a girl in Yoshkar-Ola! Small world eh?  I sense

we have much in common from reading your interests, maybe that is a

factor that influenced our similar destinations, who knows. I am also

an American that has the same problems with American culture,

obviously that is a factor hehe.


Ok, well won't bother write a novel here but just say that I am now in

Angeles City and deciding if this is the place for me and thought

maybe you'd like to maybe get together or even just hop online

sometime to chat about travels or better yet maybe I can learn a bit

about Angeles from your experiences.



P.S.  The scams your list for the CIS countries are dead on and still

happening!  I appreciate that you put them out there to help people. I

have personally known two guys that got hit with the drugging/robbery

scam, that one is very dangerous one of them almost died from it.







Subject:  Loha from down under


Yo Winston


I am a 24 professional male in Sydney fucking Australia (the land of convict descendants).  I've never been to Europe, but I've been to the States.  If you think US is bad you should come down to Australia.  The funny thing is, when I was backpacking in US I hooked up with a shit load of hot white girls.  I have to admit, The negative stereotypes are there, but not half as bad as Aus.  I read your description of the dating scene for AM and I can totally understand and expect it to be true.  However, the US situation for AM is a lot better compared to Aus.  Before reading your page, I never though that Euro girls were into AM, because the one's I met in Syd had been just as bad if not worst towards the idea of being with AM. In fact I found them to be less friendly towards AM than your average stuck up Aussie bitch.  At lease your typical Aussie bitch would attempt to appear tolerant. 


Judging from the Europeans I've met in Aus, I'm having a hard time believing (or rather, understanding) how the situation could be better for AM in Euro.  I'm not trying to contradict you or argue as I've never actually set foot in Euro.  But this I know for sure, US is whitegirl wonderland for AM compared to Aus...... 


Write back if you want and we can rant.









Hi Winston,


I read some of your stuff and can appreciate most of what you said.


I am a chinese from Malaysia.


I am also not a typical chinese. Many times I feel like a misfit in the presence of my own chinese people.


Anyway have been trying to find a way to go and live in other countries. I am still doing some research.


I totally understand what you mean when you said that you are happier now that you are abroad/overseas.


Anyway, I am trying to eventually live in the US and travel around the world.


How do you suggest that I go about it to find myself working and living in the US??


I don't have a fetish on US. Its just that I 've been there for holidays and find that I can synergize with US culture and ideas just like you did with Europe.


I am someone who would like to make lots of money but I know I am not a shallow person.


So thats all for now.







Subject:  Your website



I found your website through some browsing of other websites and must say "cheers!"  I am, extremely unfortunately, an American by birth.  (I think a lot of Americans would be very happy to shoot me if they heard that...)  I've only been lucky enough to travel outside of the US once so far (a month in China), and am looking forward to a year abroad very soon.  I'm really excited by what I'm (only beginning) to read on your site.  It reminds me of what my boyfriend, friends, and brother all think.  I have a lot of friends with similar minds--we're all majoring in international studies and find quite a few American habits (consumerism!  attachment to money!  racism! the fact that i'm putting exclamation marks behind freaking everything!) etc. extremely annoying.  Just wanted to say that I'm really looking forward to reading your site.  I should show this to my brother (currently teaching in Korea), as I think he'd agree with a lot of it. 


I hate how America becomes the center of it's own world, and the only world out there.  I'm privileged to have become an international studies major, and get exposure to the outside world!  My mom is freakishly USA-happy.  Your typical white, conservative, Christian who insists that I date the "nice, conservative Christian white boy."  In her world, everything American is good, and nothing foreign is worth it.  She hates flavors she's never had before, and is always thrown off when I offer to cook a Chinese or French or *gasp...anything stranger?!* dish.  When I got back from China, I told her about how people in big cities are a lot ruder than what I'm used to (for god's sake, I'm from a town of 40,000 and went to Shanghai...) and she said that was probably because Americans were raised in a country based on Christian principles and that the Chinese weren't.  (She's lucky I didn't backhand her at the moment). 


It disturbs me, how ethnocentric this culture has become, and how I see it rubbing off on my mom.  She seems to regard every other race (even American-born!) with a great level of disgust.  This disgusts me, as my boyfriend is native Japanese (btw, just to throw it in here, how can American women not be attracted to Asian males?) and she obviously has no deeper level of respect for him.  She'll be nice to him, merely because Christian standards dictate it to be so.  But she doesn't see him as anything other than a 'flawed human that needs converting.' 


And even though not all Americans are Christian, I still think this is how a lot of them see the world.  "Oh, these people just don't know." type of responses.  Anything different to Americans, is something bad.  No one here can think on a level deeper than partisan politics and the next paycheck (and/or meal).  I sooo badly want to move abroad.  I'll be studying in France, and have even suggested to my boyfriend that he and I move there after grad school.  I'm excited to have your ebook to read...things to look forward to, and to mourn not having here. 


Sorry if it was weird getting an email like this.  From some random (and unfortunately) American white girl.  I'd like to think I'm different from all the crap I'm reading about (am proud to say I can speak more than one langauge), but I don't know anymore.  Is American culture so pervasive that I can't escape it? 


Anyways, now I'm just ranting.  Thank you for creating this website!  I really look forward to reading it and, well, feeling envious of the day I relocate somewhere abroad.




PS--you describe the "typical male american life" freakishly well.






Subject:  dear winston...i love your work..


Dear Winston,


my English is not very well but I want to give you my best wishes for your new life. I love your website and what you say about the american social culture. I have to inform you, that it is not different in germany either. The people here are exactly as you described in your writings about american people. The girls here have this very picky attitude and don't want to socialise with persons who are romantically intellectual. I am planning to go abroad too and your insightful webpage(ebook) told me that it is possible to live in an emotionally healthy environment and fullfilling one's dreams and wishes.

I would like to hear from you. How is your life? Don't go to western european countries as they are very similar to the usa. I can verify that Germany is not much better a place than the USA is. Can you give me an advice about how I can make the first step cause I feel very insecure about just going did you do this...when did your decision became final..did you reach a point of extreme frustration. Tell me...I really would like to know.!


Kind regards




Subject: about your e-book on living in America


Nice book! I enjoyed reading, though I did not read all of it.
In general, I'd have to agree with your opinion on the aloofness
of American women. I would, however, in general, qualify that by
noting that women in major metropolitan areas are more aloof
than women in small towns and rural environments.
Let me share a story with you.
I'm 62 years old. I grew up in small a small town in middle
America. I went off to school, got a high tech education. That
education, career choices available at the time, caused me to
have to live in major metropolitan areas all of my working
When in my 20s I lived in New York City. I met a small town girl
there. We married. About 10 years later we broke up. I never
seriously had a serious partner again, substantially because I
am not particularly attractive. I'm the classic nerd: a computer
geek. Think: Aspergers Syndrome. Though I made a comfortable
living, had respect of my peers in industry, I was simply
ignored or worse by women.
I retired in 2001. I left the big city and moved to small a
small town in the west. There, I met a woman who, though we were
not compatible on a number of fronts, introduced me to the
"Taken in Hand" ( This was
the biggest eyeopener of my life.
From that epiphany, I sought out a TIH kind of woman. They are
there, in the USA, today! Lots of them, apparently. To make this
long story short, I've taken a nice lady in hand. This works for
In retrospect I'd say I fell under the influence of the popular,
and feminazi, culture of our time. That my expectations caused
by that culture were counter to what I really wanted and needed.
Therefore, the people I tried to engage were inappropriate.
Hence, my disappointment. Many have "drunk the cool-aid" of
feminazi propaganda and expect that to be America's culture. The
good news is that some have retained goals and aspirations
consistent with our evolutionary gender roles. For that, I'm
Of course, YMMV.
Rex ... yes, a pseudonym.



Subject:   Hi Winston


This E-mail is a little long, sorry! It's late and when I get typing, I just keep going... and going...)

It's so funny. I was reading your EBook for the longest time tonight, before finding out that you're the same Winston Wu who wrote the famous article where you rebutted skeptical arguments against the paranormal, something I read inside and out during my years of studying that helped inspire me to take a positive stand toward NDE research, I think we've E-mailed a couple of times in the past.

Your writing in regards to the supernatural felt much more eloquent to me. I am sorry to say that some of your book felt repetitive, because if it's that hard for you to find a date in the U.S, then you have to eventually place some blaim on yourself instead of allocating ALL of it to the external culture. Come on, tone down the whining part. And your cultural observations are accurate enough that they can explain why guys are lonely and women are distrustful. Leave it at that. You don't need to go into theories about feminism somehow hurting the culture, feminism works FOR what you're talking about, not against it. Do you want to see the U.S become someplace like chauvenistic Japan? Women here just want the freedom to look either strong and corporate, OR feminine and elegant depending entirely on their free will and mood.

However, putting this aside, I can still relate wholeheartedly to most that you talk about. I've always noticed these things about my culture, without ever leaving my country. On many occassions, I've purposefully left the house ALONE to try and explore conservative Tucson AZ-- hitting places around my campus, going to coffee-shops, even grocery stores, and seeing if it's even possible to meet people outside of parties and clubs. Yeah, it can be done, it's just hard and requires some skill.

Until I started meeting more Europeans, I used to think there was something wrong with me because I couldn't interact easily with people. I'd spend way too much time in front of the mirror, growing insecure about myself and unhappy (as many do). I thought my personality was OK, so it must be my looks. When changing things like my hairstyle didn't help, I fell back on personality, I blamed being home-schooled in the developing years of my life resulted in a "social handicap" but I didn't realize it, but this theory was far from the truth... I discovered I was actually quite pleasant and enjoyable, the stumbling block were these thick walls of ice in front of Americans and equally isolated Mexican-Americans, I started to recognize that it was a cultural dilemma, not just my own problems.

Though finding a date is still hard as hell in Tucson, I do make it a point to interract, smile, and talk to as many store clerks, hair-dressers and lonely people as I can. Now, I swear to God I get asked on a regular basis by people if I'm from Europe! This started totally changing my cultural perspectives, it had me re-thinking everything, that I could be identified as a foreigner simply by changing my attitude!

I was curious how others felt about this, which was how I stumbled into your site, as I've been planning to create a blog / online diary called "Talking To Strangers" to chronicle some of these social stigma's. My experience is that most people in America will really open up to you once they realize that you're not judging them. You have to understand Winston that there are other options then just moving to another country, making people aware of unhappy or fearful aspects of their culture is a good start. If you'd like to give me a hand with this I'd greatly appreciate it, maybe get more of an online network started to discuss these social issues. I'd definitely link your site on mine when it's done.

Finally, do you have any opinion on how the supernatural is viewed in other countries? I understand Russia is supposed to be very brazen against such notions; whereas Europe is much more open-minded to non-physical study. Any thoughts?

Cheers, and best wishes


Subject: Awesome book, travel book
Your ebook is awesome.  I was born in the US and can't wait to get out
and start hanging out with people in other countries.  I think about
it all the time, especially going out.
I will bet 99.99999% of single men in the US will agree with you.
Married crazies won't





Re: your Happier Abroad tome - you're dead right. Telling points! But can I prevail on you to write a precise of your extensive piece? Go on! Be your own ruthless editor and create a nice digestible account for those of us - most of us - who are simply not going to wade through it all because life is short.




Hi Winston!

I hope you will accept my e-mail even though I was born and raised in the United States of America.  Your web-site is very interesting and nothing could be further from the truth.  I agree with what everyone had to say about the states. I've spent right at 20 years in the Air Force so I know what I'm talking about. I spent a lot of time in Europe and some in the Far East. When it was time for me to leave Germany back in 1986 to return back to the states, I wasn't ready. When I got back I was depressed. This country is based on the "all, not so mighty dollar". It makes me sick to my stomach. We are taught from the beginning to go to school, get a good education so you can find a good paying job so you can acquire as much useless debt as possible and pay the rest of your life. Even then, the cars, houses etc don't belong to you because you only receive a deed or a certificate of title. The government owns it all. Many people here don't believe it but I always ask, Why do you pay property taxes every year and why do you have to have a drivers license, with insurance, registration and inspection. The answer I get, "It's the law". What law?  The law only exists in your minds if you realize that everything applies to your corporate body and not your natural person(human being). Most people don't even have a clue and look at you strange when you say this. American people in general are the most plastic people in the world literally. I mean, it seems just about everyone lives on credit. I did for a while and found out the truth and stopped paying on my own credit. This is another story all together. I've lived in the Philippines for a year. Some of the best people in the world. Poor in material life but SUPER RICH in the heart. Thats where it counts afterall. I want to get out of here myself just as soon as I can. I get along with nearly every foreigner I've met. I don't get in to fake, plastic, materialistic people. I laugh when I watch TV about this purported "Hollywood Lifestyle" that the mainstream media likes to portray on the American people. I'm 49 years young and I don't have much of a life here because I don't care that much for socializing with plastic, wanna be special people. When I do travel I always tell the people wherever I'm at not to believe what you see on TV. Our country has more problems then your does, the media just doesn't want the world to see this. We are suppose to look like the envy of the world, the SUPER POWER, the RICH that lives happily ever after. It is so FAR from the Truth. This is a slave factory and will always be a slave factory until the people wake up and smell the roses.

Like the ole saying goes, "you can't take it with you when your dead". I believe some people try though.(LOL). People can say whatever they want or feel about the states and I have to agree with 99.9% of it. I like it when I talk about other Americans, sometimes I get accused of being anti-American. I say, No, not anti-American, just anti-egotism and everything that goes along with it. I turn around and ask the person who accused me, you know, you are so narrow minded. Most of the time these people have not even left the states. I laugh to myself.

I might not have the college degrees and all that artificial schooling but I have plenty of "hands on" experience on different cultures and I'm a fast learner. I know a lot more then some of these preppy's that have these degrees but don't know diddly squat about the world around them. I always get, is it safe to travel there? I always reply with, yes, it is for me because I've traveled extensively and I know how to conduct myself in anothers country. It's all about RESPECT and ACCEPTANCE. I can go on and on about this. Anyway, take care and really, I enjoy reading these comments.



                                                                North Texas


hey wu... ive been reading ur blog and i find it very interesting .
 specialy those 6 advantages of european women . i think all that u said is true , wer much better than they r . specialy croatian women. how come u never came here? didnt u hear that we r the most beautiful and kind girls? and we love asian guys though theres no plenty of them so we have to fight to get one..i think ur really cute and i hate that russian girl who hurted u. so if u ever about to come to cro let me know and u can stay over at my place :) my bed is big enough;)



From a website discussion forum about my site:


glmory 10 points 8 days ago


He certainly can blame the shortage of super models though. A friend from South America explained it to me this way: When you say a girl in America is hot, what you really mean is she is not fat. When you say a girl is hot in much of the world, she needs much more than not being fat, everyone is not fat!


saprian 2 points 6 days ago


My experience here might be specific to the area were I'm staying (when I say US, I technically talk about the state I'm staying in), but I found for example that people in the US don't seem to make friends in classes; I found that pretty weird.


Let me give you an example that I found pretty striking. During my stay here I started to take dance classes. I found if I run into somebody from the class somewhere they would ignore me, not say hello, and in some cases even break eye-contact and all that, unless (!) we had officially been introduced, talked with each other or danced at the class. They treated me like a complete stranger.


When I went home to Germany for a couple of weeks I found a local dance-school and went to one of their practice sessions. On my way home at the train station I run into a couple I had seen at the dance; we hadn't talked, danced or been introduced to each other. We made eye-contact and started talking (and that was 2am at night at a deserted train station) - it was the most natural thing in the world and the conversation was very warm and friendly.


Thanks Winston. And I must add to this series of emails you've been
getting.... YOU ARE MY HERO TOO. Here I am with clinical depression
feeling like I'm wasting my year after college and its honestly giving
me hope browsing your photo collages and seeing that happiness is
definitely possible, no matter who you are. I feel like I used to be
like you once-- more risk taking, etc.... but after living in LA, I
think I'm more afraid of taking risks now than I used to be (I'm now
back on the east coast in Boston, thank God, but life isn't nearly as
exciting as it used to be-- when I'd travel Europe, Grand Canyon, etc.
etc.)  Please tell me hope is possible for a good life where I am
balancing passion with community. It seems like you have found this
balance and I am so inspired by your stories.



Phone texts from my advisor:


“Winston you are now an Asian American Moses, and you are leading your people out of the “captivity” of boredom, loneliness, lovelessness and datelessness to the various promised lands of milk and honey, many honeys that is and milk is to come later. Lol.”


“Oh, yes, and you have dared to be yourself and stand alone. That makes you lonely and a subject of ridicule for years, but if you stand your ground you become a ‘hero’. I have been called a hero a few times, too.”



Excellent write-up that can probably apply to other guys having
trouble getting ladies in the US (and other cliqueish places, though
the US is by far the worst of these) due to the weird 'in' culture
present. It's actually gotten so bad that people don't realise this
problem in day-to-day life anymore, but would if they compared to say
20--30 years ago.

I'm 21.7, and in the middle of my college career (3 out of 7 years
done) and am transferring to a university with a younger crowd than
Peirce College. If for some reason, I don't have much success there,
I'll wait till I'm out of the US before pressing this issue again. I
notice other problems with this country that haven't been fixed and it
looks like leaving to a more decent place would be the smartest choice

The Philippines are on my list of places to go on holiday to, as I'm
very into Asian women & love the tropical scene. Are there any
decent-sized clubber or gamer scenes there?


PS: I can't wait till that CD arrives.




Hello Winston. First of all I would like to thank you for taking time out of your day to

read my e-mail. Winston, I'm currently 17 years old and like you I am a Chinese

American. I love the ebooks you have online and I really enjoy hearing about your

success with white women abroad. I have a research paper on "my hero" and I

choose to do my report on you and your success. I would really like to possibly

chat with you online and just ask you simple questions for my report. You are an

inspiration to Chinese Americans such as myself. Please reply when you get the

chance to. I currently live in the Bay Area, so if you live near would it be possible

to have an one-on-one interview?


Thank you for all the time you have spent on your project and for giving teens like

me hope.






Winston, Dude,


You are a leader now! A LEADER!!!!! I was positively

shocked by these comments- so many and of so many

backgrounds. And most are Americans!!! And

Aussies?Wow! I kind of expected some ABC nerds from

Monterey Park to comment, but you are getting

basically quite mainstream people BEING LED BY YOU!!!!




And in some ways, you are being led by me.




You are definitely not living your life in vain.



Date: Jun 5, 2007 4:43 AM

Subject: Thank you Winston



After reading all your ebooks and following your advice to visit Lithuania I did and met the love of my life. I really give you credit because you are 100% right. I'm never dating or going with a shallow, superficial american woman ever again. I would also like to let you know that I am getting married in MAY 2008. Keep up the good work Winston you do inspire people.



Date: Tue, 12 Jun 2007 13:34:58 -0600

Subject: Hey Winston:


I just wanted to write and thank you for doing that e-book on Happier

Abroad. I am re-reading it. You've even quoted me a couple of times

from some of the private e-mails I've sent you. It's all so very

interesting and I'd of never know this stuff except for you.



I just talked with a guy who lived with his parents in Europe. A young

guy, he's confirmed much of what you've said, and doesn't believe he

wants to live in the US.

All the clichishness, the "I am better than you" because I can exclude

you--he says it's all so stupid.


I just ran into that attitude at the Dog park. Next time I run into

it, I am going to deal with it directly. YOU ARE NOT BETTER THAN ME,



Glad to see you've got a sexy babe for yourself in Philippines. She is

one babe. MY GOD!






Subject: Winston MY HERO - Question?


Hi Winston,

I've been reading you posts now probably for  about 4 years.  You are a hero for the underdog, proving that with balls and determination you can find fun, sex, love, and happiness in this sexless world.  I actually went to Ukraine after reading and seeing your Russian videos.  Keep up the great work! 


I also agree with you, that it is not that much about changing yourself, but about changing where you live and play.  I moved to Atlanta when it was good (now it is not) and went overseas looking too.


I have a serious question about the Philippines:

Is it safe for a white/caucasian guy?  Are there many white guys there?  I had read that Philippines can be dangerous for kidnappings.  What do you know?   Any other crime.  Thank you for your help.  







Date: Mon, 04 Jun 2007 16:10:11 +0000

Subject: Greetings from the States



Just wanted to say Hello to you. We are very like minded. My wife and i are trying to get out of the States in the next few years? Do you live in the NL? My wife was born to a Dutch mother, and we are focusing on The Netherlands as a destination.


We, like yourself, are just tired of the consumerist lifestyle here in the states. Corporate greed has reached all time highs here, and we are sick of it. We are also tried of the general ignorance of the people here. So many times when my wife tells someone she is Dutch, she gets responses about wooden shoes....and thats if we are lucky. Most people have no idea where it is on a map.


Anyway, what i am trying to do is speak with other like-minded individuals about the best ways to immigrate. We are not moving to get away from the States, but to immerse ourselves in a like minded society where we can thrive. Having travelled extensively for years, and being to the NL many times, we feel like it would be a fantastic destination.


Thank you so much for letting others see that they are not alone in their general disgust with American society and politics.





Hi Winston,


I wanted to say that just about everything in your writings reflect what's on my mind.  I grew in San Francisco and experienced things very similar to you.   What you say about the United States is spot on.  I can relate in what you say about this country being affected by insane levels of ignorance and New Age nonsense.  I, too, get tired of people saying to me:   "your problems are your fault"  or  "if you think positively, good things will happen; you will get everything you want; and women will gravitate towards you".  Yes, I've heard this a million times and I want to scream.   I can relate to you so much that I thought maybe you are me in another life.  Which brings me to my question:  How do you do it?!!


 I've been wanting to live in South America for so long because I'm originally from there.  Now I'm reaching 39 years and I'm panicking because on the one hand I feel like I'm too old to go and then I'm too old to stay and retire at a young age.   I messed up here.  I never amounted to anything and I wanted to get a good government job (I had one and lost it) and retire with a nice government. pension.  I told myself that I didn't want to become an old man in the USA.   It's bad enough that I lost my youth here.  So now I have a dilemma:  stay here and try to get a good job and then retire and go?  OR do what you're doing and leave now while I still don't need Viagra and actually be happy for once in my life and live outside this insane asylum called the US of A.   I can write volumes about why this country is difficult but for now I wanted to write to you in short prose.


Btw, I'm a friend of your friend Ladislav.  He mentioned you and your experiences.  He urged me to teach English but I feel too old and unsure about that.    Anyway, please write me back with any ideas about how to live abroad.  I was thinking translation since I'm fluent in Spanish or even medical transcription or coding or billing or something internet based to live abroad.   I don't know.  You look like you're having fun.  I do admire you for standing up against your parents since they, like mine, didn't understand what it was like for me to spend my adolescence in this country.


Thanks and take care.




Date: May 27, 2007 8:12 AM

Subject: Re: Update: How I went from being a negative pessimist to a positive optimist (and it wasn't by changing myself)


Completely correct. Environment/country is a variable.

Just make sure you will always have money coming in,

because without it, the Philippines will be a tough

place to live.


Looks like you are well positioned to become a

Filipino citizen.


The part about Hollywood playboys and you being better

than them, I had made similar comments to my friends.

I watch movies with Brad Pitt and Leonardo DiCaprio

and his girlfriends and I feel like saying- is this

the best you can do? I have had better than that many

times over.


Actually I have slept with more women than many of

these actors and they were oodles of times prettier

than anyone those guys could have.


All I had to do was change countries, and low and

behold! Jut like a miracle, ain't it?


See you after 5 weeks ( Inshallah).





Date: May 27, 2007 8:04 AM

Subject: Re: My dad's thoughts on American life when he arrived in the 70's


My Dad also felt that my going to Asia and the Middle

East was the right decision. Anyway, you are now able

to become a leader and save others.


There are many Asian American men who are now writing nasty

articles about "white apes" and are living in hell.

Save them, take them to all these promised lands. You

can be their new Moses.


As far Asians feeling alienated, many others do, too.

Do you think Europeans do not? The thing is with

Asians, the mainstream Americans do not expect them to

fit in while with europeans, they do and when you

do not act "white", they call you weird and freak and

a homo.



god damn it Winston, after reading through your ebook on 'US or Abroad', I

was nothing but compelled to send you a fan letter.


I dont know how you do it, but whatever it might be(wit, charm, outgoing

personality, etc.), i think you've got game(by that i mean confidence).


Frankly, I think you just have an uncanny outgoing personality.


Cheers and Kind Regards,




ps, you kick ass man.



Sent: Fri, 30 Mar 2007 1:12 PM

Subject: photos


Could you please send me the photo in your rogues gallery? I enjoy your writings very much. I agree with most of your analysis on American culture as compared with Russian and European culture. I have thought the same as you for many years and I am happy to have found your site for it confirms what i have thought about American Women for many years.  They are very selfish and brainwashed, They are brainwashed by their mothers, government, media and education into believing that they are some how superior to all human beings. I think once their brainwashed minds have been opened and their conceptions of themselves laid bare by self-analysis , they will see that they are truly a vain, lazy, materialistic, superficial and hedonistic shell of a human being.     Thanks Robert



Hi mate


Read your stuff its all true – I have done the same as you and went to the Ukraine where me at the age of 37 is pursued by 20 year old women who wanted me to stay and live with them in Ukraine


Now Australian women I assure you have become the same as American women just about verbatim


I can not get a woman in Australia to even talk to me let alone go on a date


Also don’t get hung up too much on how you look --- have a look at my attached picture – I assure you I have not had a date in 3 years in Australia – in Ukraine I had to cancel and decline more than I could accept..


I am Slavic heritage  I am 37 I am 6 foot 2 I am 220 pounds I am 8 % body fat never married no kids educated wealthy etc etc


What do the women say about me here – that I am too old . or  they believe I am just a meathead with no intellect or some other flake out reason


I believe the issue you and I have is that we have a brain we use it we are culturally aware we are educated we are genuine --- women in western society in this modern age can not handle this – because feminism says men like you and I do not exist – but in Russia they dream about men like you and I – men of character and integrity REAL Men  not ussyfied wimps that are “yes men “








Subject: I have enjoyed your site immensely & I have a few questions

Your (enormously large) page has helped me to realize why it is, exactly, that I feel so terrible living in the United States, it has been a goal of mine to leave for a while, but as I have very little in the way of "upward mobility" (no money) I can't quite figure out how to escape.


It seems as though I would be a great deal less miserable elsewhere and I would like to ask for advice on how to escape the US with my limited means. I can't even have a decent relationship with my parents because they are everything your page describes as the typical American, and I am not.


I'm 25 and I have never had any sort of relationship with a woman here, in Tennessee where I live, and I've always wondered why the women around here treat me like I'm a monster when I try to speak to them. Your explanations make perfect sense.


I hope you don't mind my copying some of your information, a few paragraphs, to my website, located at but I think your work is worth sharing.


I had started to print the document but then I noticed it was 225 pages long. I don't have that much paper :D


Have you ever seen The page of Fred Reed, an American Expatrate with a great many opinions that seem to jive with yours.



hi winston, my name is **** (33 yrs old), and i currently live in new orleans, louisiana. i have lived all over this country and i am so eager to explore the world as you have done. i have had it with american culture. i moved back to new orleans in 2003 because it was the least americanized city i could find, but that has all changed now.


i could go into many reasons why, but the bottom line is i really enjoyed skimming thru your ebook, although i wish you would organize it a little better because i think there are some really great insights in there. it could be more readable is all i am saying.


where are you living now? and how are you making a living?


i am researching now where to start out on my journey. i've never been out of this country, but i have come to many of the same conclusions as you, yet i was wondering if i was just projecting some utopia somewhere else and just felt foolish about it.


i don't have a whole lot of money to waste but i do have somewhat of a cushion. i am just going to take the leap either this month or next month. i've got my passport and i am as ready as i'll ever be.


do you have a myspace page?


mine is




thanks for putting it out there



Hey Bro! 
Came across your website and ebook. I too spent more than ten years in Russia and 5 in the USA, and you're RIGHT! I love Russia, and I love Russians too! White women in the USA treat Asian men like how Nazi German bitches would treat a Jewish guy in 1939, but Russians, now that's a hope for humanity after all! Good work bro, and all the all the best. Paka! 




   So you like the Philippines and find the rainy Northwest depressing? Well at least we have that in common.
 Your observations of western, especially US women, is just the way it is. I lived in the Philippines as well as other places, and I am married to a Filipina, dividing our time between the US and the Philippines is our objective. One grows in their outlook...most US women are THE WORST. Comparing them to a Cebu City hooker is usually an insult to the hooker.The stupidity of being a single man in the USA is near first advice to US men who are fed up with all the crap is that they need to get a passport, and their new life will begin.

 Wish you well,




Hi Winston, 
I gotta' tip my cap to you, man... You're the first person I've seen who PUBLICLY declares what is wrong w/ many women in our wonderful country, here in the good ol' US of A. 
That said, I have some questions for you about your videos for sale on your website. 
1) I guess by the time your 3rd trip came about, you were pretty adept at "finding" a great Russian gal to be around. I'd like to purchase your 3rd trip - Disc one video for $15. Should I just send you the $15 from my Paypal account to yours immediately, to start the process? 
2) I've heard that because Moscow and St. Petersburg are great hubs of the tourist industry that Russian women there have partly-adopted Westerner "attitudes", if you will. Would you say that's accurate, based on your lengthy experience? Or is one Russian gal pretty much the same as another, and open to marriage w/ a great guy if they run into eachother? 
Thanks man, you rock! 
Most sincerely, 



Hi Winston,

Great to hear from you.  Filipino chicks are damn cute. Yul Kwon become the first asian to win Survivor.  Winston Wu finds babe heaven.  Its a turn around year for AA guys.

I saw your posts on a yahoo group while looking for AM/WF sites for my directory.  I see a growing interest between asian guys and non-asian women.   This is a cause I wanted to support since western culture gets so little exposure to AM/XF couples and there is so much negative stuff out there to mind fuck the typical asian guy.   I've got a hot wife already, but I worry for my sons in the future.  I don't want them to go through the hell we did.

Keep up that crazy shit you do - we love it.   Have you thought about creating a modern blog?   You probably could monetize it easier.

Rooting for the for asian underdogs



I read you story about your trip to russia,, and seems that you were in a paradise.. i am from south america,, normal but only 5.5,, and that is a turn off for women there also... they are kind of the american women way,, and dont dare to approach a model type there,, i can assure that that would be a nasty experience...and there are like 20 men per girl,,, i would love to travel in russia like you do,, is expensive?? how much do you think i have to have in order to be with out problems,,, i would appreciate any comments,, 



Hi Winston, 
Despite all the flak you get you are certainly an interesting character and probably the most famous (or infamous) self-made asian on the internet We are rooting for you to get the gal. But how come you don't seem to like girls the same level as you. If you don't have looks, you gotta have money, talent, or power to get the hottest babes. Its called competition. 
Pls add me to the mailing list for updates. Look forward to your new stories. 



Hey Winston,

My question for you is about finding work in Russia.

Do you know if it possible to have a job in Russia

being a foreigner? Perhaps like teaching english or

something to make a living there. If I get married

there, I don't ever plan on returning to this fucked

up country, with all the pain of many years of

loneliness and suffering I had to go through, I am

almost desperate to leave this country now!!! Having

been able to experience the kind of life I had in

Russia as an ordinary gentleman, I have been truly

uplifted from my misery and blessed to know that women

even more beautiful than in USA exist and are willing

to spend time with me or marry me. And even if I am a

tan-skinned person in a sea of white people, I will

still be happy internally and externally in

Russia(mind, body and soul in harmony at last!!)

Especially after realizing that I don't have to be

enclosed in a "bubble/force field" all my life,

condemn myself to celibacy 24/7, and refrain from

acting on my own male desires, while I bitterly notice

some other "desirable" men get women on a periodic

basis. This is a form of harsh punishment if you think

about it, like being Pavlov's dog and forced to remain

hungry and strapped up in the presence of food,

something that no descent human should ever have to

experience. Thanks for your help.



Hi Winston,

I found your article about Russian women's motives to be of interest. I was wondering if you could comment a bit more about this:

(On a side note, I have melded and adjusted to Russian culture before, and I can tell you that Russian culture in general is not compatible with American culture, and neither are most European cultures. Hence there are very few Russian/European immigrants to America compared to Asian and Hispanic immigrants. However, Russian culture is compatible and complementary to most European cultures, and that is why the transition between them is smooth and pleasant,

What do you consider to be the fundamental dissimilarities between Russian and American cultures?

Also, I am considering spending a more extended period of time in Russia or the Ukraine in order to meet women and learn the culture. I spent a couple of weeks in St Petersburg last summer. I'm interested in spending a longer time in a location or region, but probably further south. My own interests are in art, music, philosophy and history. I am considering spending time in Odessa or another Black Sea location. Based upon your experience, does that choice make sense to you?

Thanks again for your insightful article,



Hi Winston,


My name is Danny ****.  I read your article on Russian women and agree with what you said.  I think many American men are completely clueless about this and are missing out on happiness because they have been dealing with the 'attitude' of American women and societal view.







In response to my essay


Joined: 29 Aug 2006
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Tue Aug 29, 2006 7:09 am    Post subject: Thank GOD someone said it!

Reply with quote

All my time spent in the US, this is what I’ve seen over and over again. This is why I can't stay here. Everyone is brainwashed into living beyond their means.
You couldn’t have said it better. Well done!
I'm just other American who doesn’t believe in “Keeping up with the Jones”.

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PostPosted: Wed Aug 30, 2006 2:47 am    Post subject: I agree the same as Andy & Winston reading my thoughts.
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I wish I could be as eloquent - this is exactly how I have felt for so many years and never had the TIME to escape. I am definately ready to leave and live a life with harmony and soul and socialize with those others that can see the light.

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PostPosted: Sun Sep 24, 2006 8:42 pm    Post subject:
Reply with quote

I Guess I'm lucky.

I Got divorced about 10 years ago, kids are grown and 6 years ago, I got out of the Rat Race and became a Massage Therapist and started living a more spiritual and happier lifestyle.

Now I'm READT and am going to leave this "Modern Dog Eat Dog USA" for Thailand or Ecuador (outside forces will determine which); along with a severely slashed "Cost of Living"...not to mention a Much Healthier Life.

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 10:12 pm    Post subject: On the Move

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You know I feel the same way you do. And I don't think it's so much luck - but after a while - when one just can't take anymore - you just have to make up your mind and do it! And that's in my plan too.

Good for you!


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Very accurate comments on that site. I agree with much of it. Especially the one from Cornell who says that people are cut-throat, willing to walk all over each other for success. I have had to deal with that issue all my life, because I am so not that way.


I do also think, however, that good and bad exists everywhere, in different ways and different amounts, which I know you've addressed. And we can only fight the bad so much. So it's a matter of how well we take the good with the bad.


 But yes, when it comes to this particular  problem of not being able to control the ego, and being hopelessly caught in the traps of duality, rather than engaging in interconnectedness with all, America is just about at the top. And therefore your site is spot-on about that.





Excellent essay, Winston. I will save this essay and pass it to many of my friends.


I myself am heavily influenced by nondualist studies, such as Zen, Sufism, Advaita and Taoism, which focus heavily on interconnectedness with the universe, and getting away from the "I" (and understanding that our own perception of the self is generally false).


Indeed, America is therefore a very spiritually starved place, in my opinion, because of the emphasis on a self/ego (which is most likely perceived falsely to begin with), instead of the heavy emphasis on oneness, or interconnectedness. And it wreaks its havoc in work, in family life and beyond.


By the way, India, where my family is from, is a good place to meet people. Not the greatest, but quite a bit superior to USA in terms of social life. I love it when I visit there.


I find the socializing harder at work than outside of work, because at work we have no choice but to be with often many dualistic egotists, and if we complain against them too much, it could get us in trouble (in fact, if you look at it, criticizing them in their face or behind their back makes us dualistic in return - not a good thing, really). I hope Canada is better in this regard, but I have not been there enough to really know.




My New Friend Winston, 
 If there was any doubt left in my mind about the direction I am 
pursuing in my effort to find the right Russian girl for me by just 
going there to meet several of the many I have emailed with, you have 
completely alleviated it!! I just want you to know that you are 
dead-on in your views and, being of Italian and Sicilian heritage 
myself, I've always felt like I belonged elsewhere with another 
mindset of people. I am making plans to fly to the Tartarstan region, 
and will choose a bride from the few really special ladies that I have 
been in contact with. Crazy thing is, I think I may just want to stay 
there instead of coming back to the U.S., 'cuz it feels more like home 
 I have put forth great effort in my search, after two failed 
marriages here in the States with the very same types of mentally 
unhealthy women you describe, and I have spent more than three months 
communicating with a half dozen or so young ladies that are ever so 
much like what you describe. If it's okay with you, I'll update you on 
my successes and maybe if you're in Russia earlier next year, you can 
attend a wedding?!? 
 Both you and Elena's website have inspired me to pursue this better 
class of women, and I believe that I can find a successful 
relationship with a like-minded woman there who will appreciate the 
kindness and sensitivity of my romantic heart! Thanks for your 
educational and informative article on the mind set of these wonderful 
women! Lift a glass and a toast to you...



I would definitely be up for talking to your other 19 year old friend. Right now I am working in a what I originally thought was a "corporate financing company" and I simply answer phones and ask who is calling in english (basically a secretary). I get paid a weekly salary so I don't make commissions or anything, but I have come to observe that more and more the people who call are often very upset, and that the "financial advisors" are doing less advising and more yelling, which made me accept that I'm probably working in a boiler room, although they try to convince me and other employees that what they are doing is legal, because we don't get money directly from the people who invest. I am trying to save up money so I can come back to the states and get a job somewhere there, and then come back with the proper papers to find a job either here in Barcelona, or perhaps somewhere else. I am staying until probably around May or June, at which point I may travel to a number of prospective places, I'm thinking to go to Japan and then Hawaii, and then maybe somewhere on the west coast, but if I can manage to find a job somewhere that I like outside the U.S. without papers I may opt to go that route instead, my father is mexican, so I may be eligible for Mexican citizenship which I would at this point prefer or U.S. citizenship.

As far as girls here, I have noticed that some can be a bit stand-offish, especially Catalan girls. In Barcelona Catalan is the language most of the locals use, and generally if you don't speak it they can be quite rude. However I live in a flat with "spanish" flatmates. They are from the western part of Spain, and have come to accept me quickly, perhaps because of my hispanic background? but I have noticed that they can't stand tourists, and after living here for awhile tourists can be a bit bothersome at times, but I don't think they will ever annoy me as much as they annoy those I live with.

I browsed through some of the articles on your site, a few of the ones on Christianity, and then some of the ones on American "culture". I would have looked at more, but got a message saying you went over the bandwidth? or something and I should try to view the page in a few hours. I will probably look more in-depth at it this weekend. However I was almost in a state of "awe" that you had a group of people who were "anti-winston" mentioned on your website. I can only imagine the people who joined.

The letters you sent, and the quotes I saw on the link to your website you gave me, are right on! I totally agree with the guy who said "americans are friendly, but not your friends". I remember it was very difficult to meet and actually hang out with different people in high school. Even if you talked to a girl in school and got her number, much of the time it does absolutely nothing to increase your chances of actually doing anything with her outside of school. It's funny because there are a number of girls who I used to either talk to on the phone or through various messenger programs when not in school, and many of recently told me they had huge crushs on me. I was really surprised and asked them then why didn't you ever hang out with me or my friends when I invited you? to which I got a variety of responses, most would just say I don't know, or I didn't want to risk anything. One girl was very honest with me and said she felt like I was the only friend she really could connect with, and she didn't really feel like she had any other "real" friends (we shared thoughts, poetry, and random writings at school, and e-mailed and talked on the phone during the summer, I think over the summers that we were close we hung out maybe 2-3 times over a period of 3 months, even though we talked to each other on an almost daily basis). I got the chance to relate with her alot since I came here, that people in the U.S. will "act" nice around you, but then gossip and say the worst things about you behind your back, and then try and carry on like they're friends with you. I feel like  so many people in high school at least are so busy trying to please everyone else socially by agreeing with what anyone says about anything without having their own opinion, they end up weakening all of their relationships, and burn alot of bridges.

Most of those people I knew in the states who actually had opinions didn't take the time to research issues that they claimed were important to them, so their arguments were often hallow, and when you tried to reason with them instead of taking time to look at your claim they simply say, "that's stupid," or simply personally insulting you, and in doing so regressing to childhood, rather than learning how to think critically about important issues and events. I have asked fellow students how they would define critical thinking when looking at a social issue or controversial event, and they most often say something like the following, "looking at the pros and cons of something and then picking which side you identify with." I didn't really think much of those answers at the time I posed the question, but now I can't believe how ignorant people are in the U.S. rather than creating their own opinion, they have to pick a "side" on all issues. However I'm not too surprised considering the U.S. media is constantly bombarding the public with controversial, but ultimately trivial stories about individual events that don't have a lasting effect on anyone else except those intimately involved, such as starting with the first one I know, the whole "Elian Gonzalez, scandal where that child who was brought here from Cuba and his mother died, had the Cuban government, and the boys father demanding for their return" and it was in the news for months. Then there was the case recently with that woman who was on life support, and couldn't do or say anything but was kept alive anyway, and people were debating it like crazy and acting like this situation that they have no place commenting on, was suddenly this huge issue that everyone had to have an opinion on. People in the U.S. talk about (pardon me, for being blunt) but these stupid stories that only matter to those directly involved, and these events may be important to those involved, but honestly there is no good reason for all of the U.S. to take time to analyze an issue they will not be a part of. In addition people in the U.S. have all but forgotten that we are at war in Iraq and Afghanistan. I don't think half of the citizens realize that we actually have a troop presence of 30,000 including our Allies in Afghanistan. I also think that the greater majority of Americans wouldn't be able to tell you how many Americans actually died in the 9/11 attacks. It's actually almost equal (at least the last time I checked) with the amount of Americans who have died fighting in Iraq (the estimate of the number of people who have died in 9/11 has been pretty steady at as I recall 2,970, and I believe about 2,700 U.S. troops have died in Iraq since we arrived since I last checked, but now I would imagine it's up to around 2,800).  2,700 American troops dying(or whatever is the current death toll is up to) is a fact I'm told is often told by college students who are taking social issues classes that their professors make them aware of, however, they are often completely unaware of how many Iraqi and for that matter Afghanistani (I don't know if that's the proper way to denote people of Afghanistan) civillians have died. I have read estimates that have wide range of numbers, if you go by the number of reported deaths I think it's around 16,000. I recently searched for the number of deaths, which in any case will be dificult to find the real number because the U.S. military apparantly doesn't do body counts, but I found one of the first scientific studies done says that over 100,000 civillians have died and this is excluding Fallujah the most deadly region of the country. Both numbers are controversial in the states, but even if the number is somewhere in between, it indicates alot of innocent people have died in correlation with the increased U.S. troop presence.

here are some articles/weblinks....
this first one goes over the study where they estimate 100,000 civilians died...

this is a great opinion by a canadian author here's a quote
"The debate about Canadian troops in Afghanistan is a sign of a healthy democracy, at least compared to what is happening in the United States.  At least in Canada there are actually members of the government (the NDP) who recommend a pullout of troops from the current US-led mission.  In the US, the so-called “liberal opposition,” exemplified by former presidential candidate and Democratic Senator John Kerry, derides the Bush Administration for not “finishing the fight” and recommends an increased number of troops, redeployed from Iraq.  So we have the right wing US Administration that says that everything is fine but we need more troops.  And the “left” wing opposition that says that everything is horrible so we need more troops."

the following is the website i usually use when i want to know what is ACTUALLY happenning rather than look at the rosy pictures that the U.S. media paints, the book that the creator of the website wrote inspired me to live abroad, think more critically about the government, and helped me see the obvious corruption taking place.

I wish I had time to write more, but I'm having some french girls come to visit me tonight, so I'm going to tidy up my flat.....

Thanks for the links, and hope to hear from you again!



I recently moved to Barcelona, Spain from Madison, Wisconsin in the U.S. I have read alot of your articles comparing Americans to Europeans, or simply non-Americans, and was extremely impressed with the insights you have made. I had travelled to Europe twice before I moved here. The first time was in 2003 when I was 16 years old, and I was lucky enough to get the opportunity to talk with people my age who were staying at the same hotels. In meeting people from other countries and cultures I feel very connected, just talking to people on a deeper level than is possible with most everyone in the states. I can honestly say I have only had deep conversations with maybe 6 or 7 of my close friends in the U.S. and when I say "deep" conversations I simply mean talking about things in a critical, intellectual way, which sadly most Americans are simply not capable of. There is little respect for people who think differently in the U.S. and those who do, like you have stated, usually are anti-social and keep to themselves, and who can really blame them? Most of the artists, free-spirits and critical thinkers I knew/know of in the states are depressed in one way or another, it seems to me because they are so limited in ways to express themselves without being labeled radical, weird, or other terms used to insult people who dare to have their own opinions. In fact, I recall an acquaintance of mine from high school, "making fun" of a girl who wore somewhat traditional spanish clothing, and called her "different" as an insult. These are the same people who are proud to be Americans they say because of the "freedom" they have here. Most Americans have such a warped definition of freedom and think that the U.S. is a cultural melting pot, it makes me sick to know that culture for them is going out and buying anything. Most all brag about what they buy or purchase, even if they do it in different ways. I've heard women go on about how they spent 200$ on a pair of jeans, and being more proud of the money they spent than the actual product themselves. I've heard others brag about how they bought a huge quantity of items, but then justifying it, because they were on sale, and then they never end up making use of what they bought in the first place.

I remember before I came to Europe, although I had many friends back in the states, I felt very alone and awkward at times, simply because I couldn't find any open-minded artistic people to connect with. I would often write poems and essays that no one would get or understand, when read by others they would simply say, oh cool, or wow that's really deep, but not giving any real feedback. When people would be "critical" with my writing they would most often say," You shouldn't write stuff that's so depressing, you shouldn't hold on to such sad emotions." Or when I would give essays about the Government here and just identify a "possibility" for corruption, (most often in regards to 9/11) people would get upset and say,"That is ridiculous" and not even open their mind to the possibility of another viewpoint besides the few that exist in the mainstream media of america.

I had a girlfriend whom I fell in love with in the states, but she too turned out to be hollow on the inside. She was capable of writing beautiful poetry, well-written essays, and holding good conversations, but she held no self-esteem, because she largely based happiness on what others thought of her, and how she looked, rather than knowing who she was, and being happy with herself. The relationship fell apart because of pressure from her parents who were afraid of someone who isn't afraid to see things the way the are, or even suggest that the american media might not be telling the truth. She was so afraid of not getting parental approval that she often neglected her own feelings. I remember during an argument I had with her father, rather than identify the problem he instead talked for a half-hour about how much money he made, all of his assets, his nice house, his great job, and how hard he worked so his family could be happy, and then ignored the original focus of the argument completely. In their household it seemed problems were ignored and buried rather than identified and solved, leaving them to believe they are perfect while everyone else doesn't quite measure up....

Since moving here I have made more friends in the first month of my being here, than in the last 6 months of being in the U.S. People in the U.S. tend to ignore flaws and put shove their strengths in your face, rather than work toward refining themselves, and work towards a greater understanding of others as well as themselves. It also saddens me that so few Americans lack even the slightest desire to travel to other countries to just see what it's like out of America, often some are worried that if they took a vacation, they might lose out on a "promotion" or raise... the rat race syndrome....

In this last year I have began a slow conversion from Christianity to Taoism. I have had great experiences with many religious groups at various branches of Christianity, United Methodist Churches in particular, however I think the great majority of religious leaders and zealots get the message wrong when they forget that Jesus tried to teach understanding and accepting, not condemning and excluding. Some of the most fervant believers that I have met, have never read more than 1/4 of the bible. I have alot more I would have liked to say in this "response" to your work, but basically, just keep up all you are doing, your words and stories are very inspiring, and quite honestly helped give me the extra boost I needed to get out of the states. Many of my friends can't imagine how I at 19 years of age could ever leave the U.S. for another country, then again, most of them have never left in the first place.

Take care, and keep writing.

With all sincerity...





what a story. yep, I can totally relate to you , man. NA is so stuck up and women hold all the aces in their hands. us men have to jump through hoops, and that is why I am sick of the scene here especially on the west coast.


I am going to Columbia in two weeks. I cant wait , dude....





You really tell the truth the way it is about American society. Many

people want to get in a bubble or comfort zone of a kind of fake reality

with our mainstream media, superficial tv and music and it reflects in

the women of America and social networks. Americans are being socially

engineered to live apart and not want "natural" contact with others but

instead want superficial relationships and friendships. It is hard for

free thinkers of different backgrounds in America to ever get truly

comfortable in this kind of environment, which is why I want to either

move to Europe or just travel from place to place instead of staying in

America. This country is terrible. I am a pianist who thinks that Europe

would be more open and accepting for a classical black musician as

myself! The educational system is dumbing us down as well in American,

making us submissive to authority and never questioning things in our

society. I could write a long essay about this but I agree with everything that you have said. Keep up the good work.



Houston, TX



I have read a lot, but in particular this 
made me realize a lot about the culture in which I live in America. Having never lived anywhere else I didn't really have any comparison and only vaguely realized that there were other ways of living and interacting than what is found in America, with its often cold nature. 



Having never lived outside American society I accepted as 'normal human conditions' the diseased social interactions that plague America. Reading your writings has helped me realize the causes of many of my discontentment. From there, there is no where to look but up to brighter days. 
Many thanks, 











Wow, I just got done reading your article, 

"6 Major Advantages of Russian/European Women Over American Women."

What a revelation! Actually it wasn't so much a revelation as it was comforting--comforting in the fact that I thought I was the only one to make these observations. I've never been to Europe/Russia, but I've met enough Euro/Russian women here (Los Angeles) to know  that everything you say is ABSOLUTELY TRUE.

I've lived in L.A. all of my life and made these observations many years ago. L.A. has been referred to as a lonely town. Gee, I wonder why. Political correctness and "feminism"  have destroyed the American female mind. Not to be anti-semitic, but Jews in media (which they completely run) and academia have played a large role in this.

Anyway, thank you so much for your keen insight. I was surprised that this was written by an Asian. Great article, great website. Keep up the great work.






I was referred to your webpage by a friend of mine who is from Germany.  She had sent me one of your articles and I decided to explore further on your web page.  I found the article titled " what immigrants and foreigners say about America that you never hear in the U.S. Media" very funny and completely accurate. I am glad that there are people out there who realize that the U.S. is not everything.  My friend and I always talk about this type of stuff, and it makes me very happy to see that WE are not the only ones who feel this way and get upset about it.  Because we feel we cannot express ourselves fully without getting a strange look or some kind of disagreement.  (It is as if we are emotionally in jail.) 


I, myself, am from Europe (the Netherlands) where I lived until about 8 years ago.  Being brought up in such a liberal country has made it very difficult for me to adjust to the American life style.  Soft drugs, Euthanasia, same sex marriages, and prostitution are all legal and are not looked as if they are taboo or wrong doing ( feel these things should also be legal in the U.S.)

As I said before I'm having a difficult time (still) adjusting to the American way of life. What are Americans PRUDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't stand it.  Talking about sex is a taboo, having sex is a taboo and oh boy... what if you see a nipple or a butt crack on T.V., it better be blurred out before we realize that others have those, too.  In the Netherlands (as well as other countries throughout Europe) we embrace nudity.  Women go topless or walk around naked on the beach, we wear shirts without a bra where the nipple is shown through.  It is sexy and not looked as perverted.   We have T.V. commercials (even during the day) where nudity is shown.  Something I really do not understand is that on T.V. in the U.S., plastic surgeries are shown, the breasts are cut open and everything is exposed except for the nipple that of course, are blurred out.  Nipples, vagina's, penises and butt cracks are part of the human body and should not be looked upon as something disgusting.


I also, personally, do not like the egotistic, and independent life style that exists here.  For Americans, the world is the U.S. and if lucky, Canada and Mexico is included with that. (look at the world cup in baseball... how long have the Americans won that.. oh hold on.. only the U.S. plays in it hahaha {stupid if you ask me}!!!)  People in the U.S are so uneducated about life out of the U.S. that I have been asked whether Amsterdam is a country (in which "Holland" is the capital I suppose)!!!!  Also, the independed life style is so weird to me.  People don't even know their own neighbors here, where is in Europa, we are "taught" to work together.  We do know our neighbors, in fact, during World Cups or Euro Cups, a lot of streets put out T.V.'s and couches and chairs and the whole street sits behind that one T.V. with a beer in the hand, enjoying not only the game, but also the company of their neighbors. 


I also feel that we do not live to work, but work to live and are not as materialistic as people are in the U.S.  I can personally say that as a child I may not have had everything that I wanted, but I did have everything that I needed.  In the U.S., most children get what they want so that they will shut up for another week, but often do not get the love, affection, respect and help that they need from their family members( other words, they get what they want, not what they need.)


Unfortunately I'm bounded to the U.S. because of family, how ever, I do hope to be back in Europa within the upcoming 5 years because there is no place like home ;-D 


Thanks for being an outlet, and it is good to know that I'm not the only one.   I feel a whole lot better already! hahahaha


Take care, Kim



Hello Winston, 
after having heard a lot about it, I read your report about woman and 
life in Europe (expecially Russia) compared to US. 
I am Italian and I know perfectly it, I had also a russian girlfriend 
for 2 years and now I am dating russian girls as well. 
I am lucky that here in my city there are many russian girls, much 
much better than italians. 
Just yesterday a friend of mine told me: "russians are the best, 
sensual, strong, real women" 
I saw that I can buy your videos and your photos. 
I am expecially interested in one girl that I saw in your collages, 
just in one photo. 
Can you send me some infos and tell me if you have videos with her if 
I indicate her in your collage photos? 
Keep up the good work, guy! 
All my congratulations! 



Hello Winston,

I am only on number seven of your article but I had to write you now to tell you how eloquent and spot on you are with your analysis and descriptions of our society here in America.  I don't belong here and each time I go to Europe I realize more and more that I belong there.  I can't stand Americans, the culture, the way this society is heading and especially the girls.  Your descriptions finally put into words what I cannot stand about this place.  I have had trouble putting into words why I don't like it here.  Please allow me to plagiarize, copy or put into my own words your descriptions.  I am amazed at how well you painted the proper picture. 

About a month ago I went on line due to a random thought.  I had just read about Russia and how Putin is putting the currency back on the gold standard.  The article said the Ruble will be a very strong currency while the dollar is rapidly losing its purchasing power.  Oil was another reason for Russia's strength.  So, I grab my computer under divine inspiration and start my search for a good way to convert dollars into Rubles and store them securely in a Russian bank.  About a minute later I end up on "mail-order" Russian bride website.  I was looking at the most beautiful girl I've ever seen.  I don't believe in coincidences.  Although I am communicating with several this first girl is still my top choice.  I also ended up on a Russian/Ukrainian Women Chat Group.  Don't know how either.  I started getting a bunch of horror stories and warnings about being too naive.  I went through the whole emotional craziness of thinking the girl I thought I was writing to did not exist but with the help of the Headquarters in Moscow my doubts are almost gone.  There must have been some scammers on there or these guys wouldn't tell me about how they wrote to a "10" for three months only to find out she did not exist and the address given was fake.  The letters I get are definitely from individual girls and after two or three I can see they are real, unique individuals.  I have ordered Russian Language instruction and I learn languages easily.  I'm planning a trip to meet the one and only as well as others (maybe) in October. 

Thank you for taking the time to write such a good article.  The address my girl gave either is exactly where she lives or it goes somewhere she can get to easily.  Because she got the package I sent and although she has said in the past she doesn't feel in her heart I can be her future husband, after a couple weeks of no letters she was very glad to hear from me again and is extremely thankful for my gifts.  We may be on our way now and I am determined to win the heart of this particular girl.   I know I'm not an average person, guy or American.  I consider myself a very high quality and eligible guy.  I can far surpass this girl's even wildest dreams and hopes. 

Thanks again and perhaps we can meet in person some day soon.




Hi Winston
I have been very impressed with your special missions
in dealing with Russian women. You have the skills and
tact to deal with these Russian women on their terms
on their own turf. Many of these guys on the list seem
to miss this very important fact.

From your posts you clearly turned the tables on
quite a few of them and you clearly proved with your
photos. Photos prove everything they backup the talk.
You walk the talk so to speak and very few of these
other men on these Blogging site can ever claim this
not even the agency owners whom many are scamming many

I would like to meet with you in the near future to
discuss a idea I have and your knowledge of Russia
would make this a valuable asset.
Look forward to hearing from you
Best Regards



Hello Winston, 
after having heard a lot about it, I read your report about woman and 
life in Europe (expecially Russia) compared to US. 
I am Italian and I know perfectly it, I had also a russian girlfriend 
for 2 years and now I am dating russian girls as well. 
I am lucky that here in my city there are many russian girls, much 
much better than italians. 
Just yesterday a friend of mine told me: "russians are the best, 
sensual, strong, real women" 
I saw that I can buy your videos and your photos. 
I am expecially interested in one girl that I saw in your collages, 
just in one photo. 
Can you send me some infos and tell me if you have videos with her if 
I indicate her in your collage photos? 
Keep up the good work, guy! 
All my congratulations! 



Hi Winston,

First I like to say that I stumbled upon your website while researching the ole "Russian Bride" Scam. Having experience with this insidious scheme(Didn't send any money though), I was looking if my latest "russian flower" was on the "blacklist". Read about your Russian excersions and enjoyed the pictures of the beautiful Russian girls/women you met. BTW My humble opinion is you should have concentrated on the nicer girls instead of Katya.

Secondly, let me tell you a little about myself. My name is Nicholas. I'm 36 years old and have lived in the Midwest my whole life. I'm currently single, work a crappy job and live in a crappy house I'm trying to fix up. I consider myself self-educated and somewhat well-read. People generally like me, I talk alot and could have alot of friends is I desired. A very social person but prefer being alone. I'm the classic underachiever, at least in the capitalist sense. I don't watch sports, prefering to read than watch T.V. Play video games rather than play softball. Not religious, but would be a Buddhist if I was. I'm interested in other cultures and am currently trying to find pen-pals in other countries. Women mostly, though probably not for dating. Who knows though:)

I recently read your thesis "Why I am happier in Europe than America". An interesting read. Some points I would like to make though:

1.American is all about competition. That is why the best doctors, lawyers, athletes, and what-not are here and usually are products of the "American" system.Being the best in order to "enrich" yourself is what capitalism is all about.  Feeding a person's "ego" is what America seems to be about. I never bought into this crap myself.

2.The invisable wall you described does exist. I felt it many times. With me, when I used to go out more, I would usually just be looking for some intelligent conversation. Sex sometime too. I find woman, yes even American woman, to be alot more interesting than American men. But approaching a woman with that "Fuck You" look on her face. I 'm sure you know the one I'm talking about, is hard. So I wait for them to approach me. It has happened, just not as much as I like.

3.American women dating habits are complete products of American consumerism. Ever wonder why women always seem to want the "bad boy", only to dump him once he's "tamed" Because the American Women has been taught to always want something "new" and "exciting". Something they can't have. Especially women with no "inner life" as you describe in your thesis. These women MUST always have conflict and change otherwise they get restless and bored. A very pretty girl I knew years ago summed it up to me in one sentence. I had asked her why she was with this jerk who treated her bad."It's a CHALLENGE to get him to treat me nice". The jerk was dumped as soon as he started treating her nice. She moved on to another CHALLENGE. Kind of sums it up, huh?

Well, I could go on and on but I left some of my other points at home so I'll leave off here. Let me know if you are interested in discussing these points or in hearing the ones I left at home.

 All and all your thesis is an interesting read.

Hope you are well.




Hi, dear Winston,


thank you very much for your nice e-mail - as well as your greetings

in german: "Guten Tag Heidi".


I was able to download your book from the computer and can read it, when I find more time.

How can I pay you? I don't have an account for "PayPal" - to be honest, I don't even know anything about it !  Can you give me your address to send cash?

Or would you prefer being paid via credit-card?

Please let me know, o.k.?


Interesting: you think,  German sounds "exotic"  whereas  Chinese  for

" us Europeans" is  not only the most exotic sounding language, but also the

hardest to learn !  Mandarin, Cantonese etc.... not to mention the characters, in which your language is written ....


You are a very good observer with "sense and sensibility", for you have mentioned  so many differences between the USA and the rest of the world.

Generalized the USA is more :superficial, overly naive and too optimistic.

We see things more realistic and proceed with caution, because we had

2 terrible wars already and are "burned children "!!


I like your pictures/postcards from your travel, which I saw on the web. Especially the ones from Gdansk/Poland. This used to be before  1945

a part of Germany and the city called : Danzig. I was born there in a bomb shelter in 1945 !!! ( As you can see now, I could be almost a grandmother !!)

My parents came from the former East Prussia and were refugees. They resettled later in the western part of Germany and started a new life.

Germany reunited with the eastern part in 1989 - but you know that, right?


Sorry, I wrote so much and it might not even be interesting to you.

Please let me know, which way to pay you. The book is very interesting and

i am looking forward to finish reading it.


Thanks again for your time and effort.



                                                 with best regards



Hey what's up?

I read this letter and this guy is correct about
American women.  My experiences, as well as the
experiences of friends, wings, and guys on the
seduction sites confirm all this.  Being indirect,
making yourself the prize and qualifying them instead
of them qualifying you does work.  It shows that you
are a quality guy who has many other options.  The key
is active disinterest.  Active because you approached
her and she knows you are interested in her.  However,
if you tease and pay attention to her friends (both
guys and girls) instead of paying exclusive attention
to her, she will come around.  On the other hand, I
agree with you that it is a shame that a guy has to go
to all that trouble exploiting the intricacies of
social dynamics to get an attractive girl's attention
and interest.  From what I've read, European girls
seem to have less hang-ups and American girls, and
don't need to be approached indirectly.  I would love
to skip all that and get to building attraction rather
than breaking her "forcefield" or what I like to call
"bitch-shield".  The saying, "Work smarter, not harder
comes to mind".  Why work so much harder to achieve
the same result, when you can have a much easier and
enjoyable time with women in Europe? 



Winston you have helped me well. I wanted to share my
thanks with you. Oh about being the ladies man, I was
thinking you were being able to score with Canadian
ladies making you successful in the western world.
Anyways, I do like most midwestern whites, they are
down-to-earth and friendly out here for sure. What I
meant to avoid them in Russia is the fact that I do
not plan to get in the same boat as them. Most of them
are older retiring whites looking to find a soulmate
before its "too late". I am not their age nor in their
situation. Moreover, I refuse to pay large sums of
money to these agencies for finding someone for me
when I can certainly due so myself. Forget about
getting scammed by Russian women, what about the
American-owned mail-order bride agencies charging
sometimes $15-20 for a single address, or $4000 for a
tour!! I want to meet people freestyle without too
much side intervention, your contact list will help
with initiating friendships and perhaps buying a
couple profiles may help too, but I also strongly
preserve that meeting people randomly (on the streets,
in a store, etc) has as much or more charm. And God
knows how many other letters your agency-introduced
girlfriend might be receiving. Don't you desire to be
the only man interested in them. Isn't that every
man's desire? Your photo album made this freestyle form
of dating appealing as it provided me glimpse of how
social dynamics work there, so Winston you did a great
job. I was never good with winning the hearts of
women, and always a skeptic of trusting it to a
mail-order agency, but hopefully my luck will change
when I enter the FSU. Hopefully, I will use some of
the condoms I bring with me Well anyways,
being a lone traveler, I hope things work out well. If
you have anything anything else you want to mention,
let me know soon. Again, I truly appreciate your help.





Dear Mr. Wu,


by chance I found your web site and started reading part

of your booklet. I find it very interesting and can agree with

you on so many parts.

I am German - married to an American and living since 24 years here in New York City.


I am interested in reading the whole booklet and would like to order it hereby. Please let me know, how much it costs and in which way I could pay.


Thank you very much for your time and effort.






Hey Winston,

I just read over the euro weekly digest and found you
to be the only person who knows what he's talking
about. I am a Polish-American that was born and has
lived most of my life in the US and speak fluent
English without an accent. I have spent many years
living abroad in Poland (I visit just about every
summer), Italy for a year, England for a year and
visited a lot of other countries in Europe as well as
Northern Africa.

So, when I read over your posts its just like reading
what I've known for years. When I was younger I was a
very average American teenager until I went to high
school and saw the insanity of America and the
everyday mentality of my friends from middle school
becoming that of their narrow-minded parents. Ever
since I have grown to hate America more and more by
the day. America lusts for money and greed, the whole
system is anti-friendly and geared towards those who
like to work to death, after all what is the point of
life in America if you are not working? Anways I will
spare you the rest of the generalizations because I
already mostly agree with what you wrote in your
posts. American people are duped everyday by their
popular culture and the people in power, keeping
everyone servile.

Anyways, nowadays I attend Cornell University and it is
not much different to me than my high school or any
other place in America I have been. People still lust
for success and are just more cutthroat and willing to
walk all over you to get what they want. I expected
lots of interesting intellectuals and interesting
people, but was disgusted by the mediocrity
selfishness of almost all Cornell students. Even the
European or international students change when they
come to America and lose their cultures for money and

Well, just in conclusion, I am at Cornell so that I can
get a better start in Europe because I care about my
career, but obviously not to the degree that Americans
do. I am personally more of a lover of Mediterranean
Europep and I highly suggest you visit if you already
haven't, I enjoy it much more than the North where
people are generally colder. It is nice to know that
people out there exist that know what the real deal
with the world is today. I have a few friends that
also understand this point of view, like Jake, he is
my friend on couchsurf.

Just wanted to say hi and say I know your right and the
rest is either uneducated or refuses to think deeply
enough about the overall situation in the world.

If you are in Portugal, Italy or Greece this summer let
me know, I leave on the 30th of May and will be back at
the end of August.

Keep in touch and take it easy,


I have read your stuff and I really know where you are
coming from.  I am a typical nice guy who has a lot to
offer yet gets no attention from women.   Yet they
turn around and chase the jerks and bad boys with no

Anyways,  I am also 18 and will be going to college
soon.  I am  already planning my escape.  The plan is
that after college I will try and live and work abroad
as soon as possible.  In the meantime I will pick a
country and start reading up on it and studying the
language so that by the time I graduate and am ready
to make the move I will be fluent in the language and

The problem is that it will likely be 5-20 years
before I am able to make the move especially if I end
up going to graduate school or decide to build up my
savings before making the move.  And my worry is by
that time I'm ready to make the move the country I
picked will have become just as bad as it is here in
the US.  In the age of globalization it seems that the
same forces that have made the US a bad spot for the
average niceguy are spreading far and wide. 

So I was hoping that you could tell me which of the
countries/regions I am considering are MOST resistant
to the disease that the US currently has.

Asia(taiwan, china, japan)
Southeast Asia(phillipines, malaysia, thailand)
eastern europe/russia

thanks a lot Wu!!  keep up the good work!



Hi Winston,
I read through the article "Why I am Happier in Russia
than AMerica" and trust me this hit the spot. I have
to agree with almost everything you have said.
About Indian people..yes many of them ~ 99% are
infatuated with money and doing whatever to accomplish
getting rich. They rank (and I feel bad to talk down
upon my own people) second only to Jews in thier quest
to earn. What suprises me is that they refuse to
settle for average with descent life when most people
in India earn less than $100 per month. They are
probably the world's stingiest people!! Anyways, they
love America because they wish to earn and act more
like "white" people, a legacy that developed during
the British imperial rule from the 1800s or so in
India. I act the way I am which suprises most Indian tell you the truth, I have no Indian
friends for that matter because they don't see the
world the way I do. Regardless, I am happy to be
Indian, tan-skinned, non-conformistic, hardly
relgious, beef-eating, optimistic and appreciative. 

Anyways, I have never dated a single white woman in
America to this day! I was very confused in junior
high while I saw my buddies dating and "fucking
around" but that only intensified my quest for love in
high school. I was then subject to being an outcast
for the 4 years (1996-2000) of my life while I
remained there. I saw the gang-bangers, the punks, the
preppies, the jocks, the cheerleaders, the weirdos,
the geeks and nerds and so on...but I knew I couldn't
fit into any of these categories. I am not a very
religious person and my inner conscience told me that
being Indian is not "cool" here. I never saw any Asian
guys dating a white chick which left me confused.
Maybe they don't like Asians, but why?? White women in
California will date Hispanic males though. The
Midwest, where I live now, white women date African
Americans in greater frequency but still no Asians.
Unfortunately, when I left high school for UC Davis, I
thought my love life would improve. I thought finally
I could date for the first time. Funny how history
repeats itself. ANother 4 years down the drain
(2000-2004), but now I got a degree. I can now work so
I can buy shit and live single and miserable. I can
come home every night to watch Hollywood sitcoms,
sitcoms which feature couples making love. Only I
can't...the frustration has been building all this
time, and I don't know where I can find any beautiful
women who may find me attractive too. I don't know
anything about Russian dating sites (the year is 2005
by the way), but I take a short journey to the
Caribbean Islands to relax in that summer. I go to a
Dutch Island called St. Maarten. A very picturesque
island with green sandy beaches. I am alone so I head
to a nude dance bar on the island which the locals
inform me of. I head inside and see gorgeous white
women struting their "assets" on the poles. Once comes
to sit next to me for a private dance, I get more than
one lap dance from the blond in the pic I have
attached. She is from Ukraine, the most beautiful
creature I have held on my lap. SO incredibly friendly
to talk to, I felt like this was a dream!! She
caressed me like no woman did before, spoke gentle
English words in my ear. Out of the 20 or so girls
working at that strip joint, more that 10 were
Ukrainian, most being blondes as she mentioned to me.
I want to date her!!! But she says she had someone in
Ukraine already. She told me many women are single and
wait for you in Ukraine/Russia if you go there. Her
statement marks the end of my bachelor life. I found
your article to re-emphasize my perception of Eastern
European women, which is absolutely refreshing
Winston...great job! So by 2006, I promised myself
that I shall find the love of my life or atleast get
laid. I saw some dating sites featuring Russian women
but not interested in buying profiles..some are
outdated or probably sold to too many Western men. I
want to meet somebody fresh, with no prior contact
with a Westerner. I would like to see your videos, but
I choose not to because it may spoil my experience. I
think it will be a good suprise so I will leave it at

Loved thos photos of you with those gorgeous women. I
could date every one of them.

Winston, I am receiving mail from a woman in Russia
who contacted me first. Se has sent me photos for a
couple weeks now and tells me how much she loves me.
Then a few days ago, she tells me a visa will cost her
$250. I verify this at the US embassy website in
Moscow which require only $100 for the application. I
am probably being scammed as she never gave me her
phone number nor and wishes to come to US to live in
my home. I have to reply to her request...I read your
"Avoiding scamming" article and will give her
appropriate treatment in my next letter. Damn whore!

The pics attached were of two women who gave me a lap
dance...the blond is a Ukrainian and the brunnette is
a Latvian.

I read your travel guide (took 3 hrs!) and it was a
very good guide for my purposes. I still have a few
questions to ask you as you are the only person I know
who has gone there, plus with similar backgrounds. I
really appreciate if we could chat about some things.
Alright well let me know.

Take care,




I did read the entire email.  I see that I am not
alone     in thinking this way.  I don't hate America.
I was born here. My parents immigrated from a
third-world country, not just for themselves, but for
their childen.  I thank them for that.  Yet, I am a
young adult and now feel limited here.  It's like a
long romantic relationship that is slowly reaching its
end.  I don't hate America; I am just falling out of
love with her.  I wouldn't take back the time I've
lived here, but now I feel like it's the end of the

Personally, I am working on completing my education.
Once I've done that, I will take time to travel and
decide where else to live.  I have always suffered
from wanderlust.  I have talked to my parents about it
and they fully support me even though they will miss
me.  I just have to take the necessary steps and make
it happen.  What are your plans for the future?

This is all for today.  Take care and look forward to
hearing from you soon.



Hey what up,

Thanks for writing back.  You can call me Fabian.  I
found your ebook just through surfing, I really don't
remember anymore.  Feel free to post my previous
comments after I correct them and send them in another
email. I hate seeing mistakes in my writing!  Also
feel free to add me to your list.  Hopefully there are
others that feel the same way about this country and
its women. 

Here are some statistics I saw on Fox News last night.
In a poll of people ages 18-24, more than 60% were
NOT able to find Iraq or Afghanistan on a map.  About
25% could not identify Dick Cheney as the vice
president.  By the way, tonight is the season finale
of American Idol so don't miss this all-important
show!!!!  Be sure to vote; your own future is at
stake!!! ;)  According to "In the
complete 2005 season of American Idol just over 500
million votes were cast.  In 2004 the American
Presidential election garnered a paltry 122 million

There's more:

Updated:2006-05-22 17:04:41
The Real-World Politics of 'American Idol'

"Voting is part of the process; more than a third of
the American people think their vote counts as much or
more for "American Idol" than it does for the
presidency, according to a recent poll by Pursuant,
Inc., a Washington, D.C.-based polling firm."

To be fair, many people vote multiple times on the
show. Even so, people are going to be talking about
who will win it all than say the Prime Minister of
Israel speaking in the US Congress about Israel's plan
to unilaterally draw its borders should talks break
down with the Palestinians.  It seems that the fact
that terrorists hate and attack the US (among other
reasons) for its support for Israel is much less
important to many Americans than whether McPhee or
Hicks wins. 

It's depressing to know that I am one of the few
Americans who actually enjoys following real news (not
Hollywood or other entertainment "news"), both online
and in print.  Or who likes to read books or ebooks
that are educational and helpful in my personal
growth.  That's not to say that all American
television and entertainment media are completely
deviod of value.  I don't mind indulging in the
occassional movie or satirical comedy cartoon series.
Nor do I hate watching sports, but I do limit the time
I spend watching television. 

Maybe it's just part of my personality to be
intellectually curious and not care about when
Brangelina's baby is due.  Besides, I don't think she
is really that hot or sexy.  I'd rather read a good
book, read news on Google or Yahoo, or get some
exercise.  I also have plans to learn one of the
martial arts soon. And of course, I will continue to
enjoy practicing the venusian arts with attractive
intelligent women.  The legendary ladies man Mystery
once said that ultimately, finding the right woman or
women is the most difficult part of the mating ritual.

I definitely have gone on a tangent here, but it's
cool because I agree with a lot of what you say.  As
for the methods, it's a shame that
you are struggling.  Do you put in the time to
practice or do you not make enough time?  Too bad you
don't live over here near NYC, I would definitely be
your wingman!  And you also mentioned that many girls
have a "forcefield"  (or what us womenlovers call a
bitchshield) when you talk to them.  Have you tried to
neg them once in awhile, then show disinterest, and be
seen talking to other women (what we call getting
social proof)?  Hey, I am not trying to push you or
anything; just can help trying to help out.  If you
haven't already checked out these sites, do so:

This Asian bro has gone through some the same bullshit
you get from girls. Check out his blog:

All I can say is keep the faith and practice, and
eventually move out of WA if it sucks that much. Come
to New York. It's closest thing to Europe here in the

You are very thorough with your arguments about
American culture and women.  Making these observations
is the taking of the red pill from the first Matrix
movie.  You can finally see the reality of America
instead of her outward appearances.  It's sad that
there isn't really much behind the surface of this
country because 230 year old America has been an
unprecedented and wildly successful experiment in
human history.  Yet, now it seems that our country,
its government and its culture are in decline.  Others
may say, "America love it or leave it!" If things
don't drastically change soon, the response
unfortunately will be "America: once loved it, now
will leave it!" 

That's all for now.  Take care.



Dear Winston,

"Well yes i noticed that there is a spiritual void in the US that sucks out whatever you have gained in another country. There is an emptiness that can't be described in words. Everything is based on material possessions, wealth, appearance, etc... Its a very unnatural artificial world."

Well, that just about sums it up for me.  I have no interest in living a shallow, materialistic life.  I do need money and a certain comfort level, but I don't need a Prada bag, an SUV, etc. and the credit card debt that goes along with this.  Money can either give you freedom or create more enslavement.  I want the former.  My dream is to find a country where it is cheap to live, safe and has a value system not based upon such superficialities.  A place where the money I have saved will go far, and I won't have to worry about getting some job that will kill my soul.  What is the point of life?  Certainly not to acquire useless possessions which are only status symbols, and to work your ass off to accomplish this.  There is an old story of the Fisherman and the Investment Banker which is very relevant.  If you don't know this one already, go to 

I have traveled quite a bit, been to most of western Europe, Turkey, Morocco, Costa Rica, Mexico, Belize, Jamaica, Kenya, Tanzania but have much more traveling to do.  With the weak dollar I don't want to live in Europe as I am not filthy rich.  As a woman, I don't want to live in the Middle East or Africa.  Unfortunately the paranoia about safety which you have spoken of is well ingrained in me, as an American woman.  While I am happy to adventure travel, I want to settle down somewhere that is very safe.  My research has me thinking that my next trip should be to Argentina, where the dollar is strong and as a Caucasian looking person (I am actually of mixed heritage but look very white) I will not stick out like a sore thumb.  I don't speak Spanish, but I am very bright and can learn.  America is slowly killing me, please help me come up with a plan of action.  Somewhere my dollar can go far.  Somewhere I can be myself, a warm loving person.  Somewhere where the first question asked of me is "what do you do for a living?"   My other thoughts are of Peru, Panama, Honduras, Brazil, Venezuela, Thailand, Vietnam, and Utila in Honduras.  I wish I bought in Costa Rica years ago, now it is so expensive.  I want somewhere with a stable government.  I am looking for a permanent move.

America is going to shit.  I am scared about the economy, I am scared about the oil situation, the extreme weather I see happening.  So maybe somewhere outside of the Hurricane Belt.  Somewhere I can begin to feel safe again and detox myself from all of the brainwashing done by the American media.  Well, at least the terror alerts aren't going off every five minutes anymore, code yellow, code red, whatever.  That was all done to purposely put Americans in a state of fear, and the terrorists as well as the US government and media are to blame.  Well, I am just a nice young woman.  I don't want anything to do with any of this.  I know that I don't want to have children here and raise them in this crazy culture.  I don't want them to have the same issues that I do.  I don't want to have to worry about money.  If I move to somewhere low cost then that won't be an issue.  More important than the money concerns I want to go somewhere where I feel some type of community and live a pleasant life where human relationships are more important than what kind of watch I am wearing.  Please don't disclose my name or e-mail, I am still a paranoid American woman.  But please, if you can help point me in the right direction to start changing this, I would be very grateful. 



“Karl Marx’s prediction that capitalism would fail might have came true if a middle class hadn't been created in this country to act as a buffer between the upper and lower classes, stabilizing the system, giving the low class an incentive to move up higher so they don't overthrow the elite. (Some intellectual historians have even argued that colleges and universities were created to create a middle class. e.g. Zinn, Chomsky)”


Dear Winston,


This is brilliant.  I never connected that to the failure of Marx's prediction.  You know, the ruling class is never just going to disappear ushering in actual democracy.  It's better to just let us think we have a choice.


I enjoyed your book and can't agree more.  You know, the primary reason why people in America are so sick is that they're scared.  Oddly enough, what they're scared of is themselves, i.e., their true nature that in Europe is less disintegrated.  In Freudian terms, our persecutory fascist superego is punishing our id and the result is that we're assholes.  It's sad really, how lost and unbalanced we are here. 


No one in America can be real b/c they believe (through upbringing and society) that who they originally were as children is bad or corrupt or guilty or whatever term you'd like to use (the ole' expulsion from Eden thing).  Capitalism says basically that your salvation is in consumption - fill your self hatred with products.  Essentially, all you are is a body so pacify it.  We're pathologically extroverted.  No inner world, only the Maya of appearances (in Hindu mythology).


Well, I'm glad you're on the journey of self-discovery out of the Matrix.  Good luck.  If the average American doesn't like you, then you're probably on the right track, but remember that you're not alone, just outnumbered and underrepresented.  That's the way it's always been since ancient times.







By the way, you are doing a good service to the
public by sharing your travel experiences and your
analysis on cultural differences.  Thanks to you, I am
now more determined to travel and eventually move out
of the US of A.  I was interested in travel and
location for some time before I came across your site.
But your observations have led me to see that the
grass  really is greener on the other side (of the
Atlantic).  Thanks.



Hello Mr. Wu. My name is *****. I am actually East
Indian even though my name suggests otherwise. I agree
with your ideas about US society and its women. I
think Russian women are far superior in every aspect
imaginable. I grew up in Fremont, CA until I finished
college so I know of the "Cali" culture and the wild
west culture as well. I now live in Ft Wayne, IN where
I also work as a newspaper editor. I went to school at
UC Davis (goddam fuckin Aggies, those country-lovin
SOBs!!!) so I know about how Asians were mistreated
and treated like shit even though their GPAs are
collectively higher than whites would like to believe.
Anyways, my question is that I am going to Russia in
July and I was wondering since you have been there
couple times about giving me some advice. I saw on
your lengthy discussion photos of Russian women you
saw at McDonald's and other places in Russia, so
good-looking they made me get aroused in my seat. I
would have become intimate at the restaurant, right
then and there!! But how did you approach women there
and have the "balls" to go and talk to them since you
are not Russian nor caucasian? I just don't get this
and it bewilders the shit out of me...especially
because it is so hard to talk with white women in this
piece of shit country. I have been to Toronto, Ontario
so I know how much nicer Canadian women are to
American but know nothing about Russian women. How do
you approach Russian dames and start a conversation
with them? DO you have to dress very professional,
look your best or can you get by wearing a shirt and
jeans. I don't understand because I have never been
there and I don't want to learn the hard way. Are you
married to a Russian women now? Have you ever had sex
while you were in Russia? THe only setback to dating
over there is you have to physically get your ass over
there which is costly in terms of airfare but
everything else works itself out. Can you send some
videos of the trips to Russia, especially in Tula and
Ishevsk, Kazan, Cheboiksary because I plan to head
east to see Ekaterinburg. I am going for my own
pleasure and hopefully sweep a girl right of her feet
of the streets without the use of any dating
money-hungry agencies. Also, have you actually met
over a 100 women? That would be unimaginable by
Western standard in a lifetime!! Hey if you have a
phone number, I would like to call and discuss some
more things. Let me know answers to my questions.
APpreciate it greatly.




It isnt so much that you arent happy with what you've experienced and want 100x more of it. It is like taking a poor girl from the country and bringing her to Paris. You cant then send that girl back to the countryside after she's experienced how good it is to live in Paris. Likewise, since you have felt how warm other women are in other societies, coming back to the feminist states of America is what is depressing. It is withdrawal, pure and simple.

If you went back to europe, you wouldnt need 100x more of the same experiences. You'd be happy at the same level you experienced before. It's just that in the states, those pleasant experiences with women are RARE. So it is depressing. But just imagine how depressed you'd be if you had never gone to Europe. Likely you'd think the world is a horrible place cause these women are cold here. At least now you know there is some hope.




I skimmed through your e-booklet and found it very
interesting.  I am someone who also is considering
leaving the US to Europe or Russia.  I am a Hispanic
male in his 20s living in the New York City area. 

Specifically, I have to agree with your observations
about women in the US.  They are stuck up, superficial
and bitchy.  They are not all like that, but look at
the role models they have today.  The singer Pink is
one girl who doesn't fit the mold and makes a good
point. In Pink's song "Stupid Girls", she argues that
the women that young girls and women look up to today
are either stupid or act stupid.  This type of girl
thinks it's cute and sexy to act like an airhead.
There are two major examples:  Paris Hilton and
Jessica Simpson. 

Living near the City has been the next best thing to
living abroad because women from nearly every country
come her.  I have met very friendly Russian and
Ukrainian women, who were also good-looking.  I find
their beauty, grace and intelligence to be very
attractive.  I would love to be among women who are
classy and sophisticated unlike their mostly
uncultured    and shallow American counterparts.  Once
I save up enough money, I will visit Europe.  Then, I
will start making arrangements to relocate. 

You are right that feminism has run amok in the US.
However, many women in Europe (especially the Former
Soviet Union) reject feminism and consider it a dirty
word.  They view a woman who is a feminist as either
unattractive or a lesbian.  Feminism in the US also
has made men feel guilty about their masculinity.
This guilt leads to more and more men becoming
"sensitive new age guys", which women claim they want,
but in reality do not.  

Like you, I have had my struggles with dating women.
I was labeled as a shy nerd who could not get a date
for years.  I have now shed that label and now find
that I am more attractive to women, including white
women.  You are right that white women often see Asian
men as nice, nerdy, and asexual beings. On the other
hand, it seems that they view Hispanic men like me as
hot-blooded and very sexual due to the famous figures
such as Antonio Bandera (who dates Melanie Griffin).
Yet, if you do not have the attitude, confidence and
knowledge to stir a woman's emotions, you will not
succeed with women regardless of your race or

It has taken me years to improve my dating life by
leaps and bounds, but I still have much more room for
improvement. I began this journey by searching the web
one day for help in dating and seduction.  I found one
interesting website and read through it and was
shocked at first.  The advice was so counterintuitive
but I approached it with an open mind.  I took the
advice and applied it and eventually began to reap
rewards.  It is not a magic pill but a journey of
personal growth.  Now, whenever I find someone who is
struggling the way I once was, I feel compelled to
help him out.  So if you haven't found this 100% free
website yet, check it out and be open-minded about it.
Here is the link and enjoy:

Take care and write back with your thoughts.



Thanks for the well-written writeup re: Russia vs. America.  I agree with a lot of what you say (particularly about America's politically-correctness) but do find it even more surprising when the world whole-heartedly embraces the American way of life.  Despite all of the complaints about America, foreign youths the world over are eating up our disgusting MTV-based "culture" while adults are happily embracing capitalistic competition.

The world is far from perfect :-(



I just read some of your essays.  Pretty good -
especially the one about "Why I am Happier in
Europe/Russia."  FYI, I'm also Asian-American.

I also read your essay on the WA town where you live. I
have to admit, even though I feel for you, the way you
wrote it was pretty funny. Just curious:  are you still
in WA?  And why exactly did your parents move out there? 
I thought you wanted to make it as a Hollywood actor
anyway.  Why not just find a job out in CA, and
move out there?   

Incidentally, I'm thinking of maybe heading out to La-La
land myself and making it as an actor too.  No
expectations, just want to try it out for laughs, and see
how far an Asian can go.
Are you headed out to Russia/Europe anytime soon
(assuming you're not there yet), and do you plan to expat
there for the long haul?

Hope to read more of your keen observations soon, and best regards,



Dear Winston,


How are you doing my friend ? I say friend because I have just been reading your book excerpts online  and having such a laugh at your accurate observations of American Life for foreigners ( especially Asians) I have to agree with much that you say, as I first visited the USA as a green seventeen year-old back in the late 1970s , it  was a nice-ish place then even with its social problems!  so things are really bad there now by the sounds of it, I have not been there for 18 years! even with family living there I really  do not have much interest at all . My brother who is a USA citizen now tried to tempt me to go and live there on my first visit, even then I said NO!  and hurried back off home to England, I think it was the culture shock! 


Anyway you are right about Brazil and South America generally, I came to Brazil four

years ago to live( having travelled pretty well and nearly all over  the world)   because England is now so Americanised!  The sheer number sof people whom meet me in the street,the shops, sit next to me on the Bus,  and know off the bat that I am not Brazilian and want to talk to me, is amazing and lovely as well!  I love that people feel so open and able to just "talk"   without feeling awkward or uninvited or that they " have to be your friend first" that they "have to know you first"

I always get invited to parties by people I hardly know  here! just being the Guy From England is enough!  Everyone says good morning, good afternoon, how are you doing today as if they know you, its normal life here and I dont want to change it either! 


Good work and peace to you Winston. Stay Happy where you are as you are!









As a 44 year old Navy veteran (I served 1980-1986) who's travelled the world, all I can say is this: you're right on!  From women to the screwed up hyper consumerism in the USA, you're right on.  Now, I'll finish your e-book (I downloaded it to my computer-yes!), then I'll write again...



I know, I know, I know Winston.  European girls rock.  It can't be
avoided and I might as well come out and say it - they rock!  They're
sexy without being barbie dolls.  They're intellectual without being
robotic.  I don't know what the problem is.  I just can't stand
insincerity, and this is what we've got here.

At least we don't live in Japan!






I couldn't agree more.   But we can probably trace all that work mentality to history/society, I mean we're a product of the environments that we live in.  It's just a matter finding what we think is good for us, but not all of us have the opportunity or sense to go beyond our little worlds because there's a tendency for us to be complacent / content with our lives.  And don't get me wrong, I'd like to be content and happy with my life but I'd like to know what other possibilities that are out there for me and to expand my mind.

Couple more experiences I want to share on Asian/American work mentality:
-My mother, who is an RN in a big reputable hospital in Los Angeles, as much as I love her, once said to convince me to pursue anything but the arts:  "You may hate your job, but you'll eventually love it.  I hate nursing, I don't want to have to clean other people's shit, but they pay me really well--I eventually loved my job because I love the money."
(note:  I don't want to portray them as the devil here, they just want a better life for me by saying these things. we've already settled that I'm an adult who'll make my own decisions)

-Yeah that explaining the gaps thing on the applications piss me off too.  Aren't they happy that someone is looking for work (and for their company!)  at least and not committing crimes?   I think this is to weed out people jumping ship every now and then, they want someone to stay for a long time.   I can understand this but how much loss is it on the company's part to hire/fire someone?  Also they'll always have a big pool of people to choose from.  I actually have a 3 month gap last year, and I was truly seeking out work during that time but it was hard---thank goodness for temp agencies.  I actually did put in "seeking employment" on the explanation but I don't think it helped much.  But now, since I'm still young maybe in the future I'll put in "internship/volunteering abroad" hahah.

-The "standard vacation time" (correct me if I'm wrong)  in America is for a maximum of 2 weeks, probably more if you worked more years (sheesh!).  That's enough time for a boring tour, cruise, or passing by a country without getting to know the people and their culture ---unless you stay in one place and try to really reach out.   Not enough time for adventure and exploration though.

-When I was in the Philippines, whenever *attractive teen (or 20's) celebrities* are interviewed and asked if they are seeing someone the most common answer was to shyly, embarrassingly, or demurely say "Oh no, no one right now! I need to focus on my career! My parents won't like that."   What fucking bullshit!  They're either lying and secretly hate being asked that question or that it's ingrained in their heads that career and parent's feelings get consideration first.

*there's more but that's at the top of my head.

later Winston.



Hi Winston,

Great article as always!

IMO both East Asian and American culture has this strange contradiction.  We place high value on education (college) and leaping into the rat race ("get a good job) after college.  But at the same time we admire entrepreneurs, who are often college dropouts (Bill Gates, Michael Dell, etc.).  A poor unemployed college drop-out is looked down upon, but a rich college drop-out who happens to be the CEO of Dell Computers, or Google millionarie retired at age 35, is admired for his/her success.

In Amercia we say there are 2 kinds of workers, those who work for money, and those who let money work for them.  Elsewhere they look at us and say Europeans work to live, versus Americans live to work, LoL.

If you go to another country and look at the words used to describe people based on their employement/unemployement, it says a lot about their culture.

In Japan young singles men & women who refuse to marry and often live at home with their parents are called parasaito shinguru (parasite singles), because they do not confirm to the ideal of moving out, getting married and producing children

There's a growing number of young Japanese who are rebelling against the traditional rat-race culture.  They refuse to get a full-time job and work in various part-time jobs & freelance work.  They do not care for the traditional "career" path and prefer other persuits, such as traveling around the country, living in different cities, and finding part-time employement to make just enough $ to get by.  Some are musicians, artists, poets.  Others simply want the freedom.

These people are referred to as "freeters", a combi-word from English "free time" and German "frei arbeiter" (unoccupied worker).  What's interesting is  that the Japanese Insitute of Labor classify freeters into categories, such as "dream pursuing type" (the musician) and "no alternative type".

The "no alternative type" typically covers those with low education level and can only get low-paying work, or even social underclass like ethnic Koreans and "untouchables" (burakumin) whos family lineage has been discovered and are actively discriminated against in certain Japanese towns.

The "dream pursuing type" would cover those who seek personal freedom and wanna-be artists/musicians.  But you think about it, those who leap into the rat-race right after school because they envision a life of beautiful stay-at-home wife and luxuery condo with 2 kids are after their own dreams too.  Yet you won't find a "Department of Labor" anywhere that's classify them as "Dreamers", hehe.



Hi there Winston, i was reading your article titled "Why I am Happier
in Europe/Russia than America" and i must tell you that i found it
REALLY interesting.

Since I'm from Argentina, and some years ago i used to see USA like
most people do, i really understand almost all the things you express
there. I also felt really happy to see that a foreign like you could
know so nice details about the Argentinian culture.

I feel really sad about all those aspects about USA, i feel sad for
all those people living on that "dream" they live, i also feel sad
because they seem to believe they're superior in every aspect, and
finally, i feel sad because it seems that's the way our world "work"

Anyway, just wanted to drop you a line and to say "Thank you" for such
an interesting article you wrote.



Damn good dissertation.  living here I can tell you the pathology is even more complex and far reaching than you described.  Could you correspond with me so I can get my sense of reality back?  ' Living US ' has destroyed me, my soul and my health.  I need out, even if it's on my keyboard. I can always spot a foreign girl in a crowd for two reasons:


1. She smiles at me,

2. She talks to me.



Hi Winston;

I see you write a lot about the negative aspects of America. Maybe it is
therapeutic. Actually I agree with you 100%. But there is something you and
me are missing. We are both STILL living in USA!! Have you asked yourself
the question. “Is somebody putting a gun on my head and threatening me to
stay here in USA?” No. Why are you not moving to Taiwan? In my case why am I
not going back to India? So why are we living in this horrible place? There
must be something addicting and so wonderful about USA that compensates for
all the inconveniences that you cataloged earlier. Or it is learned
helplessness? Or it is just grass is greener on the other side of the fence
phenomenon when we think about Europe and Asia? Or it is “the grapes are
sour” when we don’t get what we want in USA?

Something to think about...





I have been reading your e-booklet on why you are happier in Europe/Russia compared to America. I have found it incredibly interesting. I can confirm as a Southerner (Atlanta, GA), that you are definitely right. I am a 24 year old intellectual. I find it extremely difficult to have a meaningful and interesting conversation with Americans. I used to think that it was a symptom of being in the south, but your essays reveal it is equally bad elsewhere.


I don’t mean in any way to associate you with the Unibomber or violence, but you should consider reading Ted Kaczynski’s “Unibomber Manifesto”. While I would never resort to violence as a solution, the Unibomber Manifesto is a FASCINATING philosophical examination of the stifling oppressiveness of industrial/corporate life. You should consider reading it. Just search for it on Google.


I have never been to Europe and since I am married (at 24, I know it is a tad unusual) I doubt I will be able to travel there very extensively. However, I have been to Canada and it seemed to fit more into your descriptions of Europe/Russia than America.


Anyway, if you are up for a chat regarding these issues, drop me a line.



Hey Winston!

I've enjoyed your postings and have just posted one of my own.  I
think we might have a lot in common - especially, perhaps, our
experiences in the former Soviet union.  The mistake you make is
however assuming you can get through to people who have only
experienced one variety of life and who are entrenched in hippsterdom.
See, the hipster has a scene.  The scene dictates the ideology, and
individuality is frowned upon.

I was a Peace Corps volunteer in Kyrgyzstan.  Do you speak Russian at
all?  In the fall, I'll be a graduate student at UW for Russian.

I absolutely agree with you about seeking and about the US in general.
In fact, I am happy to say that all my friends are seekers in one way
or another.  I say, forget about the rest!  I think people in Russia
experience life at a quickened pace, and are more in touch with what
is important, whereas, bellingham is a historical backwater.

There are lots of pretty girls here too but perhaps they aren't for
people like you and I.  They are into their careers, their small town
lives, and don't ask for more.  It's painful for me to know that I
have nothing on that jackass frat boy at the next table, but I have
learned to observe.  Perhaps observation and irony can make life in
Bellingham tolerable.  Living in small towns in the states is,
however, just as confining as small towns in the former Soviet Union.
Confining in a different ideologically based way, but the hippy
ideology is, as you say, just as delusional.

So, if you speak some Russian, a couple of my friends meet once a week
to practice.  Otherwise, I would love to hang out some time and trade
travel stories over a shot or two of vodka.


<named snipped>


More -

It's amazing to me how old knowledge about the human race rings true.
The individualist always goes against the group and is often right
about important things where the group is usually wrong.  This is how
it has always been, but I, like you, often make these attempts at
getting through to others who have usually large social support
networks that are too powerful to negate.



I'm sorry I don't write much but maybe you will hear
more from me now that I have internet at home. Your
definitely right about the clicks and divisions we
make in American Society. They make me sick to be
honest and I think you would enjoy the people I hang
out with.  I have always been a guy who can hang-out
with various friends who may not even like each other
but I am like the consemate middle-man.
  Even if one friend does not like another one of my
other friends. It doesn't stop them from being my
I miss you man and want to know when you will come out
here again! My friend has a music studio which he made
himself and who is an intellectual like yourself and
extremely intelligent. There is another guy starting
an English school below the music studio called
Man there are many times I wish you were here
experiencing and engaging in many of the experiences I
have had!




I am a foreigner living here.  I came across your
e-booklet by chance after the 13 years I have lived in
the States and been trying to find an answer to the
high rate of depression (by the way I am in
healthcare), unhappiness, isolation, lack of culture
openness, fragmentation of family, alcoholism, and the
ignorance of what real life is all about.  These
chronic problems exist despite what they seem to "have
it all financially and educationally" (I am speaking
of the environment where I live and work).  I find
that there is a big misconception of differentiating
between "privacy" and "isolation".  Also, there is an
awkward unfulfilling self-interpretation of what
happiness means.  However, I have been able to draw a
striking difference between my american friends who
are well-traveled and got to live abroad and those who
never had similar experiences or have not been open to
it.  Eric Fromm in his books "to have or to be" and
"the art of loving" addresses some of these issues
that industrialism has falsely promised.  But still,
people from industrialized european countries do not
seem to suffer the same unhappiness found in America.
Actually, many (but not all) of the europeans (at
least students, tourists and those who worked here for
few years) I have met in the US relocated back to



I came accross your e-booklet on

I cannot express in words how impressed I am by your
work and how accurate and true you are to yourself.  I
have lived in the US for the 13 years now, and I can't
but agree with every single word you wrote.  I am sure
that many of my friends who have gone through the same
experiences do also agree.  America is the land of
false promise, the land of moral and psychological
depression.  People in the US who think they're happy,
are mostly so because they do not know any better.

Anyhow, I am working of relocating out of the US as
soon as possible after reality of life has become
crystal clear.  No regrets, because life events have
forced me into this direction, but now I say to
myself: enough!

Congratulations again on a job well done!!!!!



Winston, you are an Asian man trapped in a White man's
body.  All the characteristics I associate with Asian
men seem to be the opposite of you.  You do not do
what society tells you to do.  You do not work hard
just for the sake of working hard.  You find White
women attractive.



Dear Winston,


First of all, my friend wrote a much  more eloquent and descriptive essay on this same subject, but I refuse use his work. BTW he has only been in US for 6 months and his English surpasses that of natives. As a 19 y.o. Bulgarian immigrant to the US (10 years ago) I have experienced everything you mention, in the exact way in this society. I do not normally go out of my way to write to strangers, but having come up to your website has made me happy for all of what you write about is what my family, Bulgarian friends, and I have been criticizing all this time. Fortunately my culture has prevented me from absorbing "americanism" and I have been able to see all of the disparities in this country. I have nothing to comment on the empty "culture" here since you have covered almost everything. My happy memories from childhood in Bulgaria and my recent visits have prompted me to question my situation- stay in America with my generous income and soulless toys or go to Bulgaria to enjoy friends, spirituality, "true" freedom, and sex, but at a country where the avg. teacher makes $150/month? To tell you the truth I would be ready to give up what I have here except I have an opportunity to "hit" the big banks through credit and leave. The complete absence of a social life (a fake social life for the "cool" people) and the widespread hypocrisy has had me. I do, however, give credit to those genius Jews in the media who have painted America pink. My once hateful feelings of Americans are of respect and pity, for they are stuck in this atmosphere completely unawares. I do, however, completely appreciate the positives of America such as business freedom and socioeconomic mobility- mainly caused by the non-social democracy, low taxes, and the unlimited availability of hard work. The immigrant's plight is that if he stays he will miss the old ways and if he leaves he will miss the money- yes I am stuck and cannot definitively say one place is better. To those dissatisfied with America, America also grants the freedom to leave; in the end we may criticize but certainly not complain since it is up to us... Thank you and anyone else who attempts to educate the brainwashed, both here in America and across the sea.



Hi Winston,

First off, Happy New Year!

I am writing to thank you for an excellent comparison of American and Russian cultures you wrote and posted on an online message board. I chanced upon it the other day while following up on a reference in an article published on (btw, check this website out; you might find some stuff there stimulating if a little bit racy at times).

Anyway, to cut a long story short, everything you wrote in your treatise is precisely to the point. I am a Russian who has lived in the States long enough to know. I came to the country expecting to find some flavor, as I had been able to do in France and Germany. Alas, what I ran into was a sea of blandness.

I took me a while to realize that there was a chasm of difference between the media picture of America and real life, but when the truth hit home, I felt very disappointed and empty. I even had a lapse of self-condemnation as I thought the problem was in me. I have gotten over it now and can see clearly. Your writing puts all the pieces of the puzzle together very well. The flak you were getting for your posting on the website only reinforces your points: the folks who grill you are in denial, but then what woulld you expect? It's the only world and life they know. The one posting in which somebody urged you to keep your postings short lest no one would read them is especially taletelling - it made me think of what you said about the lack of intellectual curiosity among Americans.

I will be forwarding your writing to a few Russian friends of mine who are still having illusions about what type of country they ended up in.

Thank you once again and take care,




Hi Winston


I have read your description of life in Russia and how it is the opposite of what is portrayed about it in the States.


I have had similar experiences in my travels of Serbia & Montenegro.... i recommend you check it out one day. It is not a place full of warmongers and genocidal murderers that the US politicians and media have portrayed. It is the place where all the people only want one thing.... to love and to be loved .







I found your site from the link in forums. I read a good article about the differences of life in America and Eastern Europe/Russia. I read an interesting articles and pure truth about the reality of Asian men and the stereotypes and how this is played out in America. Sad but true. It is quite surprising that these chances are slim and Asian men are welcomed in Russia/Eastern Europe. I didn't know that Russians/Eastern Europeans were very opened. I usually heard only bad things from the American public. I want to be on your list. Maybe I could learn some more interesting lifestyles in different parts of the country outside the USA.





I'm a Korean male living in America that shares almost the same feelings as you do. I think that your sites should be spreaded and it really makes sense. Wow, it's amazing how much you wrote. Very motivational for me because here in Virginia, people seem to be boring and anti-social. I can't open up a good conversation even if I try because, for some sort of reason, the most good response i would get is "Hi, how's it going"? Like people here would be interested only if you are very popular with any of their interest. Anyways, I just want to say it's a great work and I like your site. It should be motivational to similar guys like us and many more.


P.S.--  It's great to hear that Europe/Russia is open about dating asian men.



"From what I have
noticed, you have made some enemies. I know mostly all of these guys are
just bitter with their own life and look for an outlet to release all their
frustrations. Unfortunately, your an easy target for them because of the
forums. The way I see it, you have done so much more than these guys will
ever do or even dream of doing.
If you were to go to my ICQ profile page, you will see a writing I have
posted there. It goes something like this:
People can be divided into three groups
Those that make things happen
Those who watch things happen
And those who wonder what happened

You are in the first group Winston. All those other people who have negative
things to say about your exploits, well, they belong to the other two groups
I'm sure. If you want, you can post any part of this letter on your forums.
Sometimes, these people need to be slapped around a little no matter who
they are.
I wish you the best."



"I have read some of the "Winston haters" posts and I see it's funny that just like politician's, rather than argue a valid point, they just attack your character. Sad! The way I see it is if any of these people had a life they wouldn't be wasting it away bashing some guy they don't know online…it's kind of like in the movie "Pirates of the Caribbean" when the English Commodore says to Pirate Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) something like.

 "You have got to be the worst Pirate I've ever heard of", and Depp says, "But you have heard of me…" My point, love you or hate you, if your making this much of a wave, your doing something right, and if someone was to argue me on the "right" part, well than I would say at least your doing SOMETHING! My Sensei (Classical Shotokan Karate) used to call these types of people "Armchair Warriors" as they just sit on the couch, complain or preach and DO nothing."



That is great what he is doing. I will tell you one
thing- you have not done what you did in vain- people
will follow you. My travels to the Philippines have
not been in vain, either- some 4-5 men have followed
me. They got beautiful girlfriends and many have
gotten laid after years on monk-like existence in the

You could have kep it all to yourself but you chose to
share- and people will follow you.

Let the cynics jack off in the closets- that's all
they are good for anyway.



Hey Winston, i must say your writings are very interesting and when i go thru them, especially the topics relating to social status and relationships and how you compare and contrast american vs. non-american cultures, i relate to your experiences a great deal.

I wanted to chat with you about some of your past experiences reagarding traveling to russia. when is a good time to reach you. are you home around 8 oclock weekdays (11pm my time)



Hi, my name is Chris and I just wanted to talk to you about your experience in Russia. I was 100% shocked and amazed when I read your letter because I find myself in the exact same position as you were in the US. Pretty girls never want to have anything to do with me, I was totally ignored in high school, and basically I feel the exact way you described, as if i am a ghost in society. I am not ugly, although I'm not the typical alpha male you described either. I am intelligent and love history, languages foriegn cultures, etc. I have been planning on a career in teaching ESL and have been very interested in Russia for a long time. I have always thought it was the way you described it there and to hear it from you was very reassuring. I was wondering if you might be able to give some pointers on how to get into the field. I am 18 years old and a high school graduate, planning to enter college next semester. What would you recommend I major in?
If you can give me some advice I would really appreciate it. And I want to thank you for taking the time to post that information on eslcafe. I really respect that you found a way to change your life and live the way you want to, and I hope to follow your example one day.

Thank you.


Chris L.



Wow Winston,
that was a very good essay. It was very clear and well thought out. And I think all the points are very valid and backed up skillfully. You are definitely a good writer.

I think your right, I could definitely change my appearance. I just feel like giving up on the whole scene here in America though. Basically I feel like I have to endure the next couple of years until I have a college degree, then I am going to try to move permanently to Europe. I have some friends who are in the Italian government and may be able to help me get an Italian passport. I could make a base in Italy and travel to Russia from there..
Your right, I got half way through your second album and had to go because I was late for a class. I will finish it today. I find it very interesting.
what other countries have you visited in Europe?





White America may hate most of the truth and facts you said in some of your writings, especially their women and RACIST men.

But that is their fucking  cup of coffee….they can live with the pain or stop reading your writings if it causes them so much pain..hehehe. I LOVE IT!!!. It causes pain to them reading the truth, and can pinch them to their born and give them more cancer….that is even better.

            As a black man in America, I know what you are saying is true. They can not bear to accept the fact that it is truth been revealed to the world about their ignorance, hypocrisy and intolerance of other racial or ethnic groups. But the fact remains that the world is changing and whether they like it or not, even their young women 18-25 are begging to worship black kahunas, some thru hip-hop black music culture, dance and protruding rear ends (pioneered by black music “doing in de butt”) their women never had in the 50’s and 60’s.

            Historically kept secret; a typical RACIST American white male would rather “rape” his daughter by incestuous acts or hang a black or asian male than have any asian or black man date his daughter.

Even just socializing with a white chick cause them internal cancer and pain not spoken out when they see you asian or black man chat, socialize or even talk to their white girls or women…but that is their prerogative and the world is changing, whether they like it on not… That is fact!

The can frame all lies and false stories about you to make you look bad (it is typical of them) just ignore them and keep on writing more of those articles.

Good luck and power to your writings. I support you 1000% Winston!




thankyou again Winston buddy!! hey, you hit the nail right into the head-- i couldnt place or find the word for this problem in usa,(of which im born into) but yes, its the clikishness!!
thats what it isss!~ the few mainstreem groups that ive been with, and not understood why i felt like __=== and im a social, nice guy, really. its their clicks.
thankyou for nailing it !
i grew up in mexico, so to recharge my batteries, i fly down south, on a weekend or two, with very hospitable friends, when i feel like im going crazy hahaha.
i cant wait to pop into ukraine and russia. I was in romania and the girls are the same, very kind, sweet and they dont just the age or what ever other hang-ups they have here in the us.
be well.
edmond :)



Mr.  Wu,


First of all if I can give you a handshake and a hug right now I will.  I myself am tired of the stuck up white girls here in America and the hypocritical, soulless culture that we have.  And now because of you and your pics--you lucky motherfucker.... Russia is one of the places to visit on my list now.   Originally, coming from surfing the net for Asian-White love I've found from other Asian male travelers that in France and other parts of Europe we Asian Men are a 10 to these women, and now...Russia.


...I'm tired man, tired, tired, tired. 


I'm an actor myself, i wanted to get girls that's why I became one--but eventually fell in love with the art of it as well but still didn't get action---the farthest that I got was a stage kiss with this cute blonde, that's it! 


Now I realize that I don't need to be a somebody but myself---in America or not.  I'll still continue though approaching American girls because it'll only help me gain my balls back by not being ashamed of myself---and nowadays there are white girls hooking up with Asian guys--but they are a rare find indeed. 

You'd love to fuck them but they can't hold a nice convo and get bored easily about things because they're so air-headed.  All they know is clubbing, drinks, and fucking MTV---I want to connect but I can't.


Btw, I didn't read all of your site...but why go to Russia in the first place?  What made you go?  Word of mouth?  Pen pals?  Impressed with the culture?  On business?  what?


Also, I'd like to point out that there's this thing called

where you could put your pics up and write things about yourself and customize the presentation.  it's like a mini-website.  you can add friends from around the world.  Right now I got this good-looking German chick who just loves the way I look--I know its the internet, but hey its a good tool to eventually meet people.  Watch out for attention-whores though who'll just add you to boost up their fucked ego, don't ask them to add you or even accept their invitation---they won't answer your mail and use excuses like "there's too many mail I have to answer" and some crap.


 Thank you very much Mr. Wu for your experiences.







I was so amazed at what you wrote and I can't tell you how much I agree with it.  I too have noticed the attitudes of people.  I am taking time out this evening to read up on your entire site.  So far, you and I have a lot in common.  It is so good to know that not everyone believes in the American dream.  Especially when you are a minority.  I am sure you experienced a lot of discrimination when you were growing up.  I know I did.  Especially from all the bible fanatics.


Keep up your writing, you have a great gift.  I will express more opinions as I read.  Most people would get very upset with what you wrote, but it is the 100% truth.  Like they say, the truth hurts.


Take care,






Hi Winston,


Wow, what a great news!!!


Winston, you are a pioneer.  You are inspiring Asian American men everywhere  to take the plunge and travel to Russia  (or Ukraine or Belarus.)  


 Yesterday I went to see Nutcracker Ballet with a beautiful  26 year old Minsk girl I have been writing emails to.   She held my hands and treated me most tenderly.   Almost like a boyfriend she loves.  Wow!!!   Imagine that.  I am a 46 year old Asian American guy who had NO American girlfriends, no sex with white American girls and of course no marriage and no family in all my life in USA.   I could scarcely believe I was not dreaming thruout that date.   It was so unreal that this beautiful girl treated me so well.


The plain fact is that most Asian American men are treated so shabbily by American girls.  We are simply zero to them.  And  most Asian American men  are totally discouraged  IMO.  They think they have absolutely no chance dating a beautiful girl of their dreams.    Well,  Winston, you have shown that it can be done.   Not in USA of course, but in  FSU countries.   Here, it just feels so good to be treated as a man for a change!   And you don't have to be a great looking investment banker guy.  Some women here just appreciate tender attention.  For some women,  even just companionship is enough! 


 I consider coming to Minsk to be one of the very best decisions I have ever made in my life.   And hopefully, I will not go back to USA.  I like to marry a beautiful Belarussian girl and live here permanently.


Best wishes.



P.S.  Please forward this letter to 'Quinn'.



Hi Winston,


I came across your web site on Google. All I say is... "Wow! I can't believe anyone would write this shit!" Lest you think this is a flame, I AGREE WITH ALMOST EVERYTHING you've writte. Hell, I've experienced almost all of it! The thing is, I can't believe someone would come out and say this--because chances are, you're going to get flamed to hell! I may think it, but I sure the hell wouldn't say it!


I am also an Asian-American. I was born in Beijing, China, and moved to this country when I was nine (I'm now 28). I speak fluent Chinese (my Madarin accent is flawless, better than most Chinese I've met), fluent English (my English according to GMAT is better than 97.5% of graduate students), and a little bit of Russian (because our Chinese Communist leaders said "shto, sovieski souz sovoidnya, eta nasha zaftra - znachit ya izuchal ruski yazik" (that Soviet Union's today is our tomorrow -- so I studied [the] Russian [language]).


I grew up mostly in North Carolina, went to Carolina -- getting a BS and MS. I experienced a lot of rejection from white girls. (No use trying to get Asian girls, as there weren't too many of them...) I have sinced lived in Boston for over 3 years, and now live in Manhattan. I tell you, Manhattan is really as good as it gets in America, and dating still suck for Asian men. The fact of the matter is, we are considered asexual by American society at large... Just look at the Manhattan craigslist. Do a rough search for Asian -- it's typically white guys looking for Asian girls, and vice versa. Sometimes, an Asian girl will add "or Asian" to their preference.


Unlike you, I do not find Asian girls to be unattractive, it's just that most of them want white men. And the few attractive Asian girls I meet here are very "over-subscribed." (I work in investment banking, and that's the term we use for issues -- stocks, bonds, whatever -- that has such high demand that it's ridiculously over priced!)


Like you, I am certainly not stupid, not unattractive (even American women from Hot Or Not ranked me as more attractive than around 80% of the men), dress very well (after all, I have to fit into a conservative investment bank) and am already in the top few percentile of tax bracket. See


for proof.


I AM NOT TRYING TO BRAG ABOUT MYSELF -- I'm just trying to prove that I'm not ugly! *LOL* That sounds insane, but you should know what I mean -- the point is, for all that, I still face VERY STRONG head-winds. I've tried VERY hard to succeed in America, and feel that in the end, I feel that any attractive [Americanized] woman who goes out with me is settling.


As one of my good [white Jewish] friend commented, American women always have this concept of the type of man they want -- tall, dark, handsome, and almost always white, and will date almost any jerk provided they fit that cast -- they're not going to diverge from that until their triple witching hour (that is -- the final hour of the trading on the third Friday of March, June, September, and December, when options and futures expire on market indexes used by program traders) -- basically, that women here won't "select" someone like you (and me) until they are too old not to have any other options. Gee, doesn't that make us feel all warm and fuzzy?


It all changed when I was getting my car serviced one day when I sat besides a [very attractive] Belorussian chic. I started talking to her, and she asked me if I was from Russia. (As you may well know, Russia has many ethnic groups -- they call them nationalities -- including many people who look East Asian. In fact, rasiski means Russian citizenship, and ruskie means ethnic Russian. It's just like China, where my citizenship was Chinese, but my nationality is Han. Of course, here in America, I'm simply "oriental"!)


The point is, while I am not "going out" with that girl anymore (I'm still good friends with her), I've never had a woman treat me with such respect. It dawned upon me that it's not me--it's all these damned American women! How can a beautiful Russian girl (who has an US passport!) think I'm a catch, and yet all these American women think otherwise? It occured to me that I should learn Russian! Hell, my parents both took years of Russian. My mother constantly sings Soviet era songs, and I had more Soviet music than even my Russian friends! Why not?? I love Pushkin, and like most Russians, read Nicolai Ostravsky when in school!


So next month, I will travel to St Petersburg and stay at the St Petersburg State University for 2 weeks to study Russian. I've never been to Europe (or Russia before), and reading your web site make me glad I made that decision.


Apropos, in picture 97 of 148 in your first album, you say that you were at "Dnepropetrovsk Park" -- that is not true. The sign in the picture clearly says Tsentrap'hi Park (Central Park).


P.S. Did you visit the  Mayakovsky metro station in Moscow? It's supposed to be very beautiful. It's named after Nicolai Mayakovsky, who wrote a lot of Marxist poetry. If you are learning Russian, and someone asks you why, answer thus:


"shto inm razgvarival Lenin!" -- [because] that it is spoken by Lenin!


The Russian (hopefully beautiful girl! ;-) will get a kick out of it...






Dear Winston-


I thoroughly enjoyed reading your insights into growing up in America &

your experiences in Russia on the AMS website!  It's makes me feel better

to know that I'm not the only American man who regards most attractive US

women as unapproachable or unattainable.  I can truly  empathize with the

pain you describe every time a  beautiful woman in this country catches

my eye.  I've been conditioned by enough rejection to know better than to

even try to start a conversation in most cases.  I can relate to

everything you've stated relating to social acceptability in American

culture.  I was born an ordinary & average looking guy and was very shy

growing up.  I still remember the humiliation I felt in grade school

after being held in contempt by a girl I'd had a crush on for 4 years.

Maybe that's why I didn't have my first girlfriend until I was 16.  I

ended up hanging out with the partying crowd in high school because they

were the most approachable clique but I paid a high price as a result.

(no pun intended)  Now that I'm older I wished I wouldn't have tried to

"fit in" with individuals engaging in self destructive behavior and

attempting to be "popular" with the opposite sex.  If I could turn back

time I would've pursued academic interests.  I'll never know what my life

would've been like if I hadn't polluted my body with unnatural chemicals

that dulled my mental abilities. 


I can relate to the depression you feel living in this culture which is

permeated with shallow people following shallow pursuits.  It's really

quite sad because I think that the America of the early 20th century was

more like the society you describe in Russia where family, neighbors and

friends are something to be treasured.  It seems to me that in society

there is a direct correlation  between financial prosperity & human

virtue.  Obviously Russian people have to live with far less materially

than we enjoy in the US but which is really worth more, possessions or

people?  Not that they are perfect people but at least from what you've

conveyed in your story they are hospitable.  I think American women have

been brainwashed over the years by myths that Hollywood, feminazis and

the media have perpetuated.  In movies how often do you see a portrayal

of a man with average looks and a modest income romanticly involved with

a desirable woman?  Nowdays it seems that most American women only

consider a wealthy, prestigious, extremely handsome man who spoils them

with expensive gifts & constant excitement desirable!  I tried a lot of

the dating websites looking for a eligible local woman but have gotten so

disgusted with most of their requirements & attitudes that I've decided

to abandon that route.  If I had a college degree I'd look into pursuing

a Russian lady.  Fortunately I find the mixture of oriental and spanish

ancestry especially attractive in the women from the Philippines! 


Winston I wish you the best of fortune in your quest for a woman with all

the qualities you desire!


Sincerely, Jim   



Very interesting story Winston. I wish you luck in your future travels. I have had a lot of feelings like you. From my earliest memory I have felt something is Wrong. LOL Yes, maybe I was born in the wrong country. Something is wrong with the women.

It is more than this feminism stuff. My experience is that women are addicted to TV. I first realized this while married for 15 yrs.

I would want to turn the TV off or way down so we could discuss things important...this would make my wife so mad she would throw shoes at my head.....and now being divorced for 15 yrs I find the same thing among the women population....most women I meet cant turn the TV off. really. It is like, hey I am more important than the TV, give me some attention. So this bad experience in marriage has made my future relationships in doubt as I now have this NO TV test for women I meet. LOL

It is more than the female attitude here. I think...But your story and others have made me feel better about not getting along well with women here in the USA. I am not perfect but I am just sure there is something going on to keep men and women apart... cant put your finger on it but it is there....

well keep up the good work JOHN




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