Advice: Find a wife that's easygoing, caring and humble

[OutWest]

HA is a site for men aspiring to marriage? Are you kidding or just not paying attention? Most I suspect are just looking for a free hooker.

Look at the top of the page, "Seeking Foreign Brides - Marriage Minded Only"

The labels are not relevant. I am not aware of a single "marriage to a foreign bride" connected to this site, EVER. The men here are mostly here for other things.
When is the last time someone posted wedding pics?....ever??? It aint happening. Lol

[Winston]

HA is a site for men aspiring to marriage? Are you kidding or just not paying attention? Most I suspect are just looking for a free hooker.

Look at the top of the page, "Seeking Foreign Brides - Marriage Minded Only"

The labels are not relevant. I am not aware of a single "marriage to a foreign bride" connected to this site, EVER. The men here are mostly here for other things.
When is the last time someone posted wedding pics?....ever??? It aint happening. Lol

That's not true. Take a look here:

http://www.happierabroad.com/FanMail2.htm

Date: Jun 5, 2007 4:43 AM
Subject: Thank you Winston

After reading all your ebooks and following your advice to visit Lithuania I did and met the love of my life. I really give you credit because you are 100% right. I'm never dating or going with a shallow, superficial american woman ever again. I would also like to let you know that I am getting married in MAY 2008. Keep up the good work Winston you do inspire people.

Also arent you outwest and davewe married too?

[MrMan]

MrMan,
One problem with marriage is that it makes you promise to love the same person for life. How can you make a promise you arent sure you can keep? I mean you can't be sure you wont change or your partner wont change later on right? So isnt it unwise and dishonest to make a promise you cant keep? Thats the fundamental problem with marriage vows. You cannot promise you wont change later and neither can she. So isnt that dishonest? How do you justify that?

That didn't scare me when I got married and it didn't scare me now (or worry me, or whatever your concern is it. In English, one of the ceremonies has the minister ask, "Do you take this woman.... to love...?"

I can agree to that. I can agree not to sleep around. I'm not fearful that it isn't goig to happen.

[Contrarian Expatriate]

CE,
Are you opposed to marriage with AW only? What about foreign women?

What about just living together without getting married? Is that called a civil union? Does that involve a contract of any kind? I heard civil unions are popular in Europe.

I am philosophically opposed to the concept of government-sanctioned marriage apart from the exceptions I describe below. The government has no place sanctioning personal relationships between people and holding men legally accountable when we want to leave. In order for government-sanctioned marriage to die off, more men have to simply say no and refuse to engage in it. It is not the government's place to sanction my relationships and regulate how many women I can have attached to me. Suppose I don't want to support just one woman? If I want 5 women to support, by golly I will do it!

American women (like most Western women) are the worst of the worst in terms of marriage partners. Their masculine social conditioning, the laws that enable their abuse of men, and their poor mothering and wifely skills make them more objectionable than all others.

HOWEVER

I would support a man's marrying in the following circumstances:

-He is an older, red pill aware man in an age-gap relationship and he simply wants to reproduce and does not care about the risk of being fleeced of his wealth. So long as his seed is being provided for and nurtured for future success and inherited wealth when he dies, he accepts the risk but moves forward.

-He marriages pursuant to a family requirement to inherit wealth. Some families (Jewish especially) impose that requirement for continuity purposes.

-He marries purely to obtain foreign citizenship benefits. I would legally marry to obtain Swiss or an Eastern European citizenship.

In these cases, the tangible benefit to the man outweighs the oppressive and abusive force the woman can impose with the help of the state. But the traditional "love marriage" scam that most younger men seek needs to be killed off far quicker than the slow, generational death we are seeing now.

Young men who want to raise children (not sure why any would) should do so in unmarried partnerships abroad and away from the legal tangles of their home countries. For example, an American man who wants to have a family should build a family as an unmarried man in a non-feminist, non-western country. By remaining unmarried he retains the balance of power over the woman who has an incentive to work to keep the man in the relationship over time. If the woman becomes abusive to the man, the man can leave at any time so the woman has an interest in keeping him happy and contented.

Some countries are experimenting with temporary marriage that must be renewed every 3 to 5 years. This holds promise however marriage remains a legal status full of control, obligations and penalties for the man. It is up to the man to minimize his risks and maximize his escape options if the woman gets to be too much to bear.

[Cornfed]

CE, you realize there is a difference between your species and ours when it comes to marriage, right? For your species the purpose of marriage was for big shots to have a harem and ordinary bucks to have some sheboon to do his domestic chores and forage for him. Since bucks took little part in the raising of children, it wasn’t really that important who impregnated the sheboons. Females could do almost all the work, since you lived in tropical abundance, except during droughts which you couldn’t do anything about anyway.

Human marriages in the frozen north were different. Men had to contribute more than they took for the community to survive. Hence they had to develop the instinct to be somewhat obligated to women and children. However, because they were putting so much effort into raising children, they wanted to be sure the children were theirs - hence the Euro concept of marriage. Horribly gynocentric to your species, but an instinct we had to develop to survive in our environment.

Of course now marriage in the West is insane, so your advice not to do it is about as insightful as advising someone not to put his dick into the food blender, but hopefully you can see where the idea comes from in humans.

[MrMan]

Young men who want to raise children (not sure why any would) should do so in unmarried partnerships abroad and away from the legal tangles of their home countries. For example, an American man who wants to have a family should build a family as an unmarried man in a non-feminist, non-western country. By remaining unmarried he retains the balance of power over the woman who has an incentive to work to keep the man in the relationship over time. If the woman becomes abusive to the man, the man can leave at any time so the woman has an interest in keeping him happy and contented.

That doesn't make much sense. In western countries, at least in the US, an unmarried couple can easily put a man's name down on the birth certificate and he is legally recognized as the father. If things he could end up paying child support, but that could happen anyway. But somewhere like Indonesia, if they aren't married, then the father's legal status with the kids isn't clear. At least he has legal rights in court to have the kids after they turn 7 or 8. I've never even heard of a court forcing a man to pay child support in Indonesia. I don't see where the cards are stacked against men for marriage at all in Indonesia. If a woman were abusive, a man could just go live somewhere else and marry a second wife or shack up with a woman. Some men do that sort of thing, sometimes just because they get bored and aren't very good husbands. The woman is left ashamed without a husband in the house. I guess you could say the cards are stacked against women because, as far as I know, the courts do nothing in these situations. Families have to help abandoned wives.

A lot of your arguments make no sense at all in other countries.

Also, in a lot of countries, if you shack up with a woman who is willing to shack up with a man who won't marry her, you will likely have access only to the woman at the 'bottom of the barrel.' That's especially true in countries where girls tend not to be promiscuous. Bar girls in the Philippines might go for it. Other girls who are a bit promiscuous might do it, but you lose out on the opportunity to be with the virgins who were trained to be wives in responsible families from childhood. But hey, there are plenty of prostitutes in other countries with low self esteem to choose from, I suppose. You never know about individuals you meet, but virginity before marriage is considered normative in Indonesia. If someone loses their virginity before marriage, that's stigmatized, especially for women.

Some countries are experimenting with temporary marriage that must be renewed every 3 to 5 years. This holds promise however marriage remains a legal status full of control, obligations and penalties for the man. It is up to the man to minimize his risks and maximize his escape options if the woman gets to be too much to bear.

That's a crazy law. More filing and paperwork. I'd imagine these governments would want a fee for filing every so many years. That's more of a legal hassle than just recording that you got married on some legal document or in a family Bible.

Also, why only support men getting married if there is a huge age gap? Why not allow for a young man enjoying the emotional aspects of young love, the regular sex that can come with marrying a young, nubile female, while they can enjoy it multiple times a day without having to pop a pill first like some really old man? You mentioned young men having children. It is a lot easier to do that when you are young.

Waiting until you are old to get married is kind of giving a raw deal to the foreign girl who isn't responsible for all the feminism that has messed up western society. She gets the shriveled up leftovers.

[Contrarian Expatriate]

That doesn't make much sense. In western countries, at least in the US, an unmarried couple can easily put a man's name down on the birth certificate and he is legally recognized as the father.

Of course these things don't make much sense to you if you don't have the legal background or substantive knowledge to know that a man must sign the birth certificate attesting to the fact that he is the father. Any man foolish enough to do so without full knowledge of paternity deserves to have to pay. But even such a full can petition the courts to remove his paternity if it is later discovered he is not the father.

Not sure why these simple concepts are so difficult for you. My guess would be "sour grapes" where nothing you'll never be able to enjoy will ever make sense. You've have your poor hand of cards so continue to bluster as if it's a good hand, we get it.

A lot of your arguments make no sense at all in other countries.

Also, in a lot of countries, if you shack up with a woman who is willing to shack up with a man who won't marry her, you will likely have access only to the woman at the 'bottom of the barrel.' That's especially true in countries where girls tend not to be promiscuous. Bar girls in the Philippines might go for it. Other girls who are a bit promiscuous might do it, but you lose out on the opportunity to be with the virgins who were trained to be wives in responsible families from childhood. But hey, there are plenty of prostitutes in other countries with low self esteem to choose from, I suppose. You never know about individuals you meet, but virginity before marriage is considered normative in Indonesia. If someone loses their virginity before marriage, that's stigmatized, especially for women.

Oh poor you if you believe that virginity myth. I have been with (had sex) with so many girls abroad (mostly from Muslim or traditional countries) who later represent themselves as virgins when they later marry. The surgery to replace the hymen is extremely popular in those countries where the local men, like you, are led to believe the women are really virgins. I have some very bad news for you. Your wife was very likely not a virgin, but she, like hundreds of thousands, had the hymenoplasty surgery too and you fell for it hook line and sinker Has your wife ever lived in Jakarta by chance? If you send me a photo, I can tell you if I know her!

https://www.indoboom.com/2013/stories/v ... abaya.html

Also, why only support men getting married if there is a huge age gap? Why not allow for a young man enjoying the emotional aspects of young love, the regular sex that can come with marrying a young, nubile female, while they can enjoy it multiple times a day without having to pop a pill first like some really old man? You mentioned young men having children. It is a lot easier to do that when you are young.

Waiting until you are old to get married is kind of giving a raw deal to the foreign girl who isn't responsible for all the feminism that has messed up western society. She gets the shriveled up leftovers.

Some of us have the health, vigor, and fitness where there is no perceptible difference in our 50s than our 30s. Maybe that is a genetic thing, but if your having such sexual difficulties already, don't assume all of us are in your unfortunate situation.

Also, since you admittedly were a virgin when you married, you had no clue about being a SINGLE "young man enjoying the emotional aspects of young love, the regular sex that can come with being with a variety of young, nubile females." Being that you missed that opportunity, I would expect that you would play "sour grapes" since you wasted your opportunity with monotonous marital sex with a woman who has by now declined in attractiveness and in no way still appeals to you in the way when you were duped into marrying her.

[MrMan]

That doesn't make much sense. In western countries, at least in the US, an unmarried couple can easily put a man's name down on the birth certificate and he is legally recognized as the father.

Of course these things don't make much sense to you if you don't have the legal background or substantive knowledge to know that a man must sign the birth certificate attesting to the fact that he is the father. Any man foolish enough to do so without full knowledge of paternity deserves to have to pay. But even such a full can petition the courts to remove his paternity if it is later discovered he is not the father.

Not sure why these simple concepts are so difficult for you. My guess would be "sour grapes" where nothing you'll never be able to enjoy will ever make sense. You've have your poor hand of cards so continue to bluster as if it's a good hand, we get it.

I did not comment on such aspects of law. I've never had the problem, so I don't know the details of the forms which would vary on a state by state basis, anyway. But that wasn't my point. My point is things aren't always as easy in countries where fathering bastards isn't the norm.

What doesn't make sense are your US-specific comments when applied to societies where the family courts are not biased against men, and where a man may have less rights over his children if he doesn't get married. Not every society is set up with a simple process for being recognized as the father when he has a bastard child.

Oh poor you if you believe that virginity myth. I have been had sex with so many girls abroad (mostly from Muslim or traditional countries) who later represent themselves as virgins when they later marry. The surgery to replace the hymen is extremely popular in those countries where the local men, like you, are led to believe the women are really virgins. I have some very bad news for you. Your wife was very likely not a virgin, but she, like hundreds of thousands, had the hymenoplasty surgery too and you fell for it hook line and sinker

Is there something about the way you were raised that causes you to think that every woman is sexually immoral? I am aware of hymen restoration surgeries. I am in favor of doctors who participate in such frauds should being held criminally and financially liable. But again, you like to over generalize. If any wife is a bad wife, you generalize that they all must be.

Some of us have the health, vigor, and fitness where there is no perceptible difference in our 50s than our 30s. Maybe that is a genetic thing, but if your having such sexual difficulties already, don't assume all of us are in your unfortunate situation.

I'm not an old man, so maybe you can tell us about sex enhancement. I think I'm about down the level of the average 20-something-year old for sex drive now that I've aged, based on stats I've read. But I keep up a reasonably high frequency with my wife. A 27-year-old waitress telling me something positive about my energy doesn't satisfy it for me.

Also, since you admittedly were a virgin when you married, you had no clue about being a SINGLE "young man enjoying the emotional aspects of young love, the regular sex that can come with being with a variety of young, nubile females."

No, I haven't been with a variety of women. I haven't had sex with men either. Have you? You quoted something along the lines about men's bodies being more attractive a while back. Refraining from sexual immorality isn't anything to be ashamed of. I don't have any 'wild oats' that I don't know about being raised not knowing who their daddy is, either, and no compulsive urge to continuously scratch my nether regions either.

[Falcon]

MrMan makes a lot of great points that I would agree with. It's actually beneficial to be married in many Asian countries.

[Contrarian Expatriate]

I did not comment on such aspects of law. I've never had the problem, so I don't know the details of the forms which would vary on a state by state basis, anyway. But that wasn't my point. My point is things aren't always as easy in countries where fathering bastards isn't the norm.

Well trying to come off as an authority on things you know little about makes you appear even more like a dumb ass.

Is there something about the way you were raised that causes you to think that every woman is sexually immoral? I am aware of hymen restoration surgeries. I am in favor of doctors who participate in such frauds should being held criminally and financially liable. But again, you like to over generalize. If any wife is a bad wife, you generalize that they all must be.

Newsflash: Women like to screw and that does not make them sexually immoral; get over it. This is why virgin men like you should never marry without having a clue about sex in general.

So you want to jail physicians who conduct hymenoplasty? The women who deceive their husbands get a free pass however huh? Well, you're a gynocentric cuck for having that opinion. Why don't you just jail hairdressers and beauticians too, dumb ass? Oh, don't forget about plastic surgeons!

I'm not an old man, so maybe you can tell us about sex enhancement. I think I'm about down the level of the average 20-something-year old for sex drive now that I've aged, based on stats I've read. But I keep up a reasonably high frequency with my wife. A 27-year-old waitress telling me something positive about my energy doesn't satisfy it for me.

What a tortuous shame if you have the hyper sex drive of a 20 something, but you can only sexually indulge in your ageing wife, the only woman you have slept with in your life! Wow, that's got to suck big time. No wonder you're so triggered on these issues.

Also, I hate to break it to you but when a woman makes effusive comments like this to you and agrees to meet up it generally means she wants to f**k you half-wit. Why is that not clear to you? Don't you get any women hitting on you at all? Did your father somehow miss teaching you that so you had to resort to Asia to snag a cheap "bar girl" for a wife? This is why you need to toss your wife aside and live the life you have been deprived as there are so many things you just don't get.

No, I haven't been with a variety of women. I haven't had sex with men either. Have you? You quoted something along the lines about men's bodies being more attractive a while back. Refraining from sexual immorality isn't anything to be ashamed of. I don't have any 'wild oats' that I don't know about being raised not knowing who their daddy is, either, and no compulsive urge to continuously scratch my nether regions either.

As someone who spends hours in the gym keeping up a sculpted appearance, I do think the a well maintained male physique is artful, mine included. Biceps, triceps, traps, gluts, and lats have have earned me a lot of attention over the years.

The poorly maintained or aging female body is repulsive yet is virtually the norm in the West. Only the young, toned, and thin bodies of young women are appealing to me, not the flabby, worn-out, bodies of middle aged nag hags like your wife who I'm quite sure you're tired of having to screw at this point. Is she the best you could do? Really?

[MrMan]

I did not comment on such aspects of law. I've never had the problem, so I don't know the details of the forms which would vary on a state by state basis, anyway. But that wasn't my point. My point is things aren't always as easy in countries where fathering bastards isn't the norm.

Well trying to come off as an authority on things you know little about makes you appear even more like a dumb ass.

Take your own advice. Are you trying to be dishonest, or can you just not follow an argument. I said your commentary makes no sense. You were treating other countries as if they followed US family law. I know enough about the US to know it's easy for the father of a child born out of wedlock to be named the father.

Is there something about the way you were raised that causes you to think that every woman is sexually immoral? I am aware of hymen restoration surgeries. I am in favor of doctors who participate in such frauds should being held criminally and financially liable. But again, you like to over generalize. If any wife is a bad wife, you generalize that they all must be.

Newsflash: Women like to screw and that does not make them sexually immoral; get over it. This is why virgin men like you should never marry without having a clue about sex in general.

So you want to jail physicians who conduct hymenoplasty? The women who deceive their husbands get a free pass however huh? Well, you're a gynocentric cuck for having that opinion. Why don't you just jail hairdressers and beauticians too, dumb ass? Oh, don't forget about plastic surgeons!

No, I think they ought to put the women in jail for it, too, and I wouldn't be opposed to the death penalty for women for this type of fraud if there were solid enough evidence for it.

We know women wear makeup and get their hair done. That's understood, not true deception.

What a tortuous shame if you have the hyper sex drive of a 20 something, but you can only sexually indulge in your ageing wife, the only woman you have slept with in your life! Wow, that's got to suck big time. No wonder you're so triggered on these issues.

No, I'm happy with my life.

Also, I hate to break it to you but when a woman makes effusive comments like this to you and agrees to meet up it generally means she wants to f**k you half-wit. Why is that not clear to you? Don't you get any women hitting on you at all?

Not according to some of the posters around here it isn't. You didn't mention fornicating with the waitress. Flirting and getting a compliment made you blissful, based on what you said. I avoid flirting with women. Being decent isn't a crime.

Did your father somehow miss teaching you that so you had to resort to Asia to snag a cheap "bar girl" for a wife?

Do you decide to act like a lying piece of trash in real life all the time, or do you just save it for when you are hiding behind a computer on the Internet? Did your momma raise you to tell lies like that? I know you are capable of behaving yourself better.

You aren't the only MGTOW to act like that either, and it's a bad advertisement for your movement. The fact that you think you have to resort to dishonest insults about people you don't know implies you do not have a solid, reasonable argument. Treat Harvard Health research like a conspiracy theory and insult other posters. Throw in some formulaic armchair faux psychological diagnosis, where you insist the other poster means the opposite of what he says. If you can't hold your own in a discussion based on reason, insult your opponents family members. Do you think you are going to convince anyone of your religion.... oh yeah...ahem... ideology with that sort of trashy behavior? You just make yourself look like a jerk to those you are trying to influence.

[Contrarian Expatriate]

You aren't the only MGTOW to act like that either, and it's a bad advertisement for your movement.

And you are not the only emasculated Cuck to act that way you do. It's ironic that you expect younger men to aspire to what you have become, a married, beta tool (in both contexts) for that rapidly depreciating asset you call a wife.

Also, MGTOW is not a movement, it is a lifestyle that good men find for themselves. There is no need for me to recruit or advertise, I am just overjoyed that myself and other fortunate men have the means, knowledge and savvy to partake in it. If others don't wish to do so, it is not my concern.

[Winston]

@Johnny1975 has a new ebook out about finding a good woman.

The Smart Man's Dating Checklist: What to Look for when Seeking a Good Woman

https://www.amazon.com/Smart-Mans-Datin ... 00K5ZHTCW/

[Winston]

Another important advice:

You also gotta find someone who beats to the same drum as you and thinks and feels the way you do as well and is on the same wavelength and flow as you.

For example, a freespirit rebel and hippie like John Lennon would not have been happy if he had married a good square conservative Christian woman, even if she would make a good wife. Because he would have nothing in common with her. So he had to marry a woman that was like him, a rebel and hippie freespirit type like Yoko Ono. Because she dances to the same drum as him and connects with who he is.

Thats the kind of woman you should settle down with. Not just any woman with good qualities who will make a good wife. Just because a woman would make a good wife or has good wife qualities doesnt mean she will match you. A lot of men forget that and view women like animals. Thats a big mistake and not conducive to a happy good relationship. Even old fashioned people forget that having the same interests and wavelength matters a lot.

[El_Caudillo]

Sure good advice Winston..but easier said than done. It seems like there are less free spirit types in the world as say compared with the 1960s. John Lennon was one of the most famous guys in the world and still ended up with Yoko Ono lol. But did you know that John Lennon had an affair with a Chinese American 12 years younger than he was named May Pang? She was quite cute!