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Steve Neese ? Testimonial and Story: Why I?m Passionate About Happier Abroad and Global Dating



Steve Neese



Greetings. I want to take this opportunity to give a little background as to how and why I became involved with the Happier Abroad movement and why I am so EXTREMELY passionate about it. But before I move on, I want to first introduce a critically important disclosure in case anyone gets the wrong idea about my message and what I am really about.???


DISCLOSURE ? Before anyone reads my introduction below, I want to start off by making it clear that I am not suggesting that every single American woman has the problem issues as described in this article and as described at our Happier Abroad website. I have repeatedly stated this fact in all my writings and my interviews on this subject. However, that being said, we are saying that most American woman do have these issues to one degree or another. As you read the material that we present here at Happier Abroad, you will see that every single opinion or statement that we make regarding American woman, the US dating scene, and American culture is backed up by America?s top leading social psychologists and relationship experts. For example, in her book , Dr Laura Schlessinger says the following about the attitude and character problems of American woman of today, she states, ?They reflect typical attitudes of a preponderance of women in today?s America.? (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg xxi). Note the word she uses, PREPONDERANCE. This is synonymous with the word MOST, or ?THE MAJORITY?.?


Before anyone might draw the wrong conclusions, I want to make it perfectly clear that I don?t ?dislike? American women as some may inaccurately conclude after reading this article. Everything we discuss simply relates to American woman only as their role in relationships and marriage. Nothing beyond that. As it is, I have great female friends, family, and co-workers whom I consider very wonderful people! Many of these ladies are a very important part of my life and whom I respect and admire very much.


Lastly, my goal here is not to bash American culture or the woman, even though that?s how it is probably going to come across to many people who read this material. My goal is ultimately a POSITIVE one, which is to HELP single men realize that their lack of success in the American dating scene is not their fault. We are here to tell men that the problem lies with their LOCATION, as in the location of their dating pool. We also want to help men understand some of the issues and challenges that they are likely to face with many woman in America should they choose to date or marry one. Again, we reiterate, we are not saying that ALL American woman are bad marriage partners. We are talking in general terms only, and as the research shows, the problems lie mostly with woman born after 1967. Once you read the research section, you will fully understand why one should exercise great caution when choosing to marry American. The most pertinent example of why such caution is warranted is the statistics that show the odds of divorce when marrying an American woman are 50-60% but this drops to only 20% when marrying a foreign woman. Whether one wishes to believe this or not, it is undeniable statistal fact. See the research section for documented and sourced proof of these divorce statistics. Once you have read our research section, you will begin to understand why there is such a sharp difference in divorce rates between the two cultures..???? ???








My Story


I first became involved with the Happier Abroad team in the Summer of 2010 when I accidentally came across Winston Wu's website. When I read it, it blew my mind because it was the first time I found anything that provided a logical explanation about what I have been experiencing within the US dating scene all of my life. I believe it also offered great insight into the reasons why I have preferred dating foreign woman for most of my life. In that regard, I've appreciated the support and understanding that my friends and family have had about my preferences towards dating foreign women. I?ve always had a feeling that some of them simply wrote off my aversion to dating American women as some kind of personal eccentricity or some sort of brainwashing by stuff I was reading on the internet. But then, one day I was SHOCKED when I happened to come across material presented by several leading American researchers and relationship experts who absolutely agreed with? happier abroad?s views and with the complaints I've been espousing all my life about most American women as dating and relationship partners. For me personally, it was nothing short of vindication. (See my Research Section for proof of this). With this new found evidence, I felt inspired to share this truth with other men to help them shed the false stereotypes that exist in our culture about finding love and marriage overseas and to encourage them to look at the facts instead of the stereotypes. We present evidence that shows that men have far better dating options for love and marriage by going overseas, especially if a man?s goal is to stay married.


My deep passion and inspiration for this subject matter stems from the fact that I truly care about helping others who are going through what myself and many other guys have gone through. I have observed way too many frustrated single men in America who are unnecessarily letting their lives pass them by (No love, no family, etc) and its truly not their fault. In addition, there is a very pervasive narcissistic attitude with many woman today in America that especially rears its ugly head in the bar/singles scenes in the US. My friends and I are tired of seeing so many American women being so rude and stuck up in these singles scenes when guys are simply trying to be nice and just say "hello" to them. Guys in the U.S. simply deal with such haughty behaviours because they don?t have any choice and don?t know any better. Men have a tendency to assume that woman the world over are relatively the same so they think that?s just how woman are these days. But as explained further down in this article and also in the research section of happier abroad, nothing could be further from the truth. The good news is that we are here to shed some light on this subject matter for you. At happier Abroad we will show you that not only do you have choices, but the QUALITY of choices are usually better when going abroad.?


Lastly, in my opinion, girls from small towns, country girls, and ?real?christian girls tend to be very down to earth, genuine, non materialistic, and humble in similar ways that foreign ladies tend to be. That being said, however, even these types of woman have been infected to some degree with the downsides of feminism and the narcissim of American culture. Unfortunately, good family values and good relationship qualities are simply becoming harder and harder to find with woman of mainstream America. In fact, I think the problem has become so severe, that finding a quality woman in America has become akin to the ole perverbial ?needle in a haystack? scenario. Most woman of quality are quickly snatched up and do not remain on the market for very long. This leaves most single men with few good options. To be fair, it?s not that the American men are perfect either! The research shows that many of the same narcissistic afflictions that are affecting American woman so much are also affecting some of the men but to a much smaller degree. For example, as Dr Jean Twenge mentions in her research, ?Narcissistic personality traits rose just as fast as obesity from the 1980?s to the present, with the shift especially pronounced for women? (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 1-4). And she later restates this fact once more in her book when she wrote ?The upswing in narcissism appears to be accelerating: the increase between 2000 and 2006 was especially steep. The changes were especially large for women? (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 31).

So, as you can see, our claims about what is happening to American woman are not some crazy ideas by a group of disgruntled guys who have an axe to grind. But rather, our claims are quite legitimate and supported by leading American experts. Again, it bears repeating, please refer to our ?research? section on the left side menu bar on our home page to see sourced research and expert quotes that support our claims here at happier abroad.




The two types of frustrated Men in America


1) Those who have trouble getting a date with anyone at all ? these types tend to have one or several of the following characteristics that severely limit their success

??? in the states : physically unattractive, obese, extremely broke, uneducated, or socially inept. They types can still do very well overseas due to the law of supply?

??? and demand. In general, in Asia, Latin America, and the former soviet republics, woman far outnumber men. There is literally an army of a million bachelorettes

??? looking for husbands. Another reason these type of guys can do well abroad is due to the differences in what woman are looking for in a mate. Foreign woman

??? don't marry a guy because he is "cute" or "cut" or has a certain ?image?. Marriage for them is about security, family and faith. And niceness and character really

??? counts with them. With foreign ladies, its more about ?who you are? as opposed to ?what you are? in terms of career status and income?).??


2) Those who have attractive qualities (i.e. great looks, highly educated, strong intellect, good job etc) ? Many of these men simply have not been able to find the

??? type of woman they would want to settle down with. Therefore they choose to remain single. I myself definitley fall into this category. I have found that

???? the majority of men who are dissatisfied with the dating scene in America also fall into this category. One quote I found on the happier abroad message board

???? that clearly comes from a man in this category puts it best: ?I can't speak for everyone but getting dates or getting laid in America was never really a problem

???? for me. What was a problem was the lack of high quality females in America with whom Id want a serious relationship with.? 



??? In addition, further down below in this article, I document a report from the United States Immigration Services that describes the characteristics of the type of men?

??? that typically go abroad for love and marriage and as it turns out, their report reveals that the typical type of men who do this are not ?losers? as popular American

??? society stereotypes would have you believe. What the USCIS report found was just the opposite! The typical man who goes abroad for love and marriage is??

??? highly educated and successful! They found that these men tend to hold managerial/white collar type of job positions. Imagine that! Not a bad crowd to be a part

??? of huh? So much for stereotypes. Right??





The Perfect Storm? - that makes America the absolute worst dating scene for men in the entire world


The American dating scene is extremely unique and unlike any other dating scene in the world. Below is a summary of what I will discuss in this article. Every item below is documented by research studies and expert opinion which can be found in the ?research? section of happier abroad. I call it the perfect storm.


1)     The obesity epedemic - Immediatley wipes out *70% of the potential dating pool for men (UNLESS a man happens to like fat woman?).

???????????????????????????? ??????????????As per the US national Institute of Health


*Before anyone considers this as shallow, lets turn the tables a bit and consider the UNIVERSALLY TRUE FACT that woman almost always say that they are

not attracted to men who are shorter than them. Woman tell me this ALL THE TIME! Scientific studies bare this out. So if we are to accuse men of being

shallow for not being attracted to overweight woman, then we must also say that most woman are shallow for not being attarcted to short men. In fact, I saw

a nbc news piece about internet dating in America and they had a researcher state that for every inch in height that a man gave up, he would have to make

$15,000 more income to make up for it. Besides, we all know that men are visual creatures. We cant control what we are attracted to anymore than a woman

can when it comes to short men. And to women?s credit, men are more sensitive to an obese woman than woman are to an obese man. Fact is, there are just

some unavoidable biological truths of attraction in play that cant be denied and that affect both sexes.



2)     Severe gender imbalance ? Over abundance of single men (10-15% in most cities) on the market allowing woman to develop spoiled, picky, and unappreciative attitudes. See proof here


3)     ?American woman 2nd least flirtatious in the world which explains why its so easy to meet woman when men go overseas vs here in the US where woman don?t flirt with you. In the US environment, you have to try extra hard to make anything happen. The woman do not help you meet them.

See proof of study here


4)     Feminism has taught woman to be emotionally independent of and to not need men. Dating in an environment where woman NEED men is a night and day difference compared to the US dating scene.


5)     American woman are generally unapproachable ? See the approachable faces section of happier abroad to see what I mean. Do you notice the difference in attitudes?? As the experts tell us, most communication is non verbal. Go to any public venue in the US such as a mall or public event and notice the fear, paranoiya, and uptightness, the lack of eye contact and lack of warm friendly smiles from the woman as they walk by you. Notice the stern and serious facial expressions, the cold supercilious steely eyed look,? and closed off body postures that says to men ?don?t bother me?, or ?don?t approach me unless it?s business related or unless you need directions?. Foreign woman on the other hand do just the opposite. They generally make eye contact and give off warm, friendly, smiling, an receptive facial expressions towards men that signal to men ?Yes, it?s ok for you to try to talk to me. I would be pleased to meet you?.? The reason for this difference is that woman overseas have not been taught disdain men and see male strangers as sexual predators, creeps, or as dangerous. Winston Wu has another theory about this anti approachability force field of American woman:

?I can only speculate and surmise that the individualistic values of our nation that create a sense of separateness in the self, coupled with the modern feminist culture that overempowers women to lose their femininity and become independent, has caused some type of imbalance that has changed their human nature.  These two factors could very likely produce a strong but false sense of self and ego, an illusion that American women overprotect in unnatural ways, such as by emanating this anti-stranger, unapproachable force field, among other things.??

Any man who has traveled overseas to Latino, asian, or Russian/Euro cultures can attest to this huge difference with the attitudes of the woman in public. How can a guy meet woman at US public venues when they are so closed off and unreceptive towards men?????


6)     American woman are age senstive. For men in their upper 30?s or 40?s or 50?s, it is extremely unlikely a girl in her 20?s will date you. Or, for guys in their mid 40?s and 50?s, its unlikely that a girl even in her early 30?s will want to date you. This leaves those men with few good options unless you actually prefer older woman and the baggage that typically accompanies them by this age. It?s a simple fact that woman in the US in their 30?s or 40?s are mostly divorced (if not jaded)? and have children by this age. On the other hand, many foreign woman actually prefer 10-20 year age differences and single woman who have never been married and no children and in their upper 20?s and 30?s are quite common abroad compared to in the US. This is another one of the global dating secrets for men who find themselves striking out with younger woman in America. In fact, see this U tube interview that covers age preferences of the woman in the Philippines.

. ????????? 3:17 - 4:11?.? Talks about how in America, after a man turns 40 yrs old, he just isnt able to?

????????????????????????????????? attract the type of woman he would want unless perhaps he is a very rich man

4:54 - 6:20 .?.Discusses the politically incorrect truth about no matter how old men get, they still

???????????????????????????????? find themselves attracted to younger woman.

6:25 - 9:44 .?..Dating scene in America for 40+ yr old men. The unrealistic expectations and

?????????????? ??????????????????judgementalness of American woman. How age differences are percieved

??????????????????????????????? differently between the two cultures. For example, a 40 yr old man approaching a

??????????????????????????????? 20 to 25 yr old woman in the US is looked down upon as pathetic, or a pervert or

??????????????????????????????? Creepy. But what is so refreshing about the Philippines is that age discrimination like

??????????????????????????????? this is totally non existent!!



About the Research Section of Happier Abroad

The other purpose of the the Research Section section here at happier abroad that I created for this site helps resolve a perceived shortcoming of Winston Wu's website. This perceived shortcoming was a lack of factual ?legitimacy?. While Winston does support much of his information with evidence based links, it was less comprehensive than the Research Section now presents. We wanted Happier Abroad to be more than just an opinion piece. I wanted to take it to the next level by backing up the information presented with world renowned American expert opinions and research. No longer can anyone attribute Happier Abroad as just a group of negative disgruntled guys on a rant against American culture and the US dating scene. We now have America's leading experts in our corner backing up our claims.


Happier Abroad goes above and beyond the other 100?s of like minded websites that carry a similar message by documenting facts, research, and expert opinion which we have posted in the ?research? section of this website. In this section of Happier Abroad, we quote world renowned american experts such as Dr Laura Schlessinger and America?s top Social Psychologist Jean Twenge, and several other leading American experts. Our motto continues to be ?inspiration through education?.?



Debunking the false stereotypical term ?Mail Order bride?


There is no such thing as a mail order bride. These women use the internet to communicate with men now, just like a normal dating site. In fact, there is now an abundance of foreign woman profiles on most of the mainstream American dating sites such as yahoo personals and plenty of No one is ordered to be a bride and never has been. This old axiom came about due to the fact that before the internet came about, American men and foreign woman had no choice but to communicate by mail. In addition, men and woman profiles were placed in catalogs due to the absence of the internet back then. The term is still used today mainly as a shaming tactic used against men who would consider going abroad for love and marriage as searcing for love abroad is still somewhat stygmatized, though is becoming less so as time goes on.?


Proof that many woman in America are relationship dysfunctional

?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? This dysfunctionalness contributes to the highest divorce rate in the entire world




In the paragraph below, Dr Laura is touching upon the ?Bad boy? syndrome of American woman which is why so many are so dysfunctional. This commonly known syndrome is about how American woman often prefer the jerks instead of the nice guys. In most other countries however, the reverse is true, Foreign? woman prefer the nice guys because foreign woman come from healthier cultures where woman are simply more emotionally stable, far more mature, and more psychologically grounded than their American counterparts of the same age. Foreign woman just have a healthier disposition about them which is quite clear to see when one travels abroad. Foreign woman simply recognize better than American woman do that ?nice? guys make for a more healthy and stable relationship than the ?bad boy? player types do.??




?As a radio talk- show host/psychotherapist, I?ve got to tell you how remarkably true and sad it is that so many women struggle to hold on to some jerk, keep giving an abusive or Philandering man yet another chance, have unprotected sex with some guy while barely knowing his last name, agree to shack up and risk making babies with some opportunist or loser, all in a pathetic version of a pursuit for love, but will resent the hell out of treating a decent, hardworking, caring husband with the thoughtfulness, attention, respect, and affection he needs to be content. It boggles my mind. What further puts me in boggle overdrive is how seemingly oblivious and insensitive many women are to how destructive they are being to their men and consequently to their marriages. Women will call me to ask if its alright to go off on extended vacations ?without him? when they want freedom or R&R, or if its ok to cut him off from sex because they?re annoyed about something or just too tired from their busy day, or if they really have to make him a dinner when he gets home from work because its just too tedious to plan meals. (Doctor Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg xiv) ?

??She discovered that she was becoming more naggy, hostile, and bitter, with a growing feeling that she was being cheated out of life. When her husband came home, she stopped going to the door with a hug and a kiss, stopped showing affection, stopped having sex, and even stopped the good-night kiss. Basically, she was blaming her husband for her unhappines, insiting that it was up to him to go out of his way to please her and pamper her to make up for how difficult her life was. Never mind how difficult his day was- which was only amplified by his wife?s angry discontent.? (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 121-122)   


?Generation Me? women spend less time on house work than our mothers did; we expect to split things 50/50 with our male partners, and when this doesn?t happen we often explode.? (Generation Me, pg 196)



See this yahoo news video that discusses more BAD BOY dysfunctionality with many American woman




Mark Davis of Euopean Dream connections shares a dating story about his date with an American woman

Apparently, Mark was set up on a date by a female friend of his. But even though the date went very well, she didn?t want a 2nd date with Mark as explained below:


?She said that Angie called her after the date and said you guys had a great time, but she thought she was troubled that you sent her an email right when you got home. She is terrified of stalkers and you violated the 72 hour no-contact rule. WHAT!?!?!?! Yep, that's right. I had violated her unwritten law about waiting 72.3 hours before communicating after a first date. Evidently, I learned that Angie had other "issues" in her life, but her friend hoped that we'd make a connection. She thought I was a nice guy who would help her friend find stability for her soul. Sorry, Dr. Davis is not Dr. Phil.?



Misc Internet Quotes

Why do so many good men in the USA just get totally ignored by American woman?

Answer #1

?I have heard a few different explanations for this however the most generally accepted one seems to be the idea that in wealthy countries women don't need men for providers so they go around with bad guys because they find them more entertaining. While I can see this as clearly being true in the USA, I don't think this applies to all wealthy industrialized countries. I have met several girls from France, Germany, Japan, and even Scandinavia who, despite being raised in wealthy societies, actually appreciated a good man. To be honest, I consider this whole notion that the socioeconomic conditions of the country where a woman was born determine whether she pursues bad boys or good men to be just plain wrong. If it was true then I would not have met so many good girls from other wealthy industrialized countries. I think the reason is actually something more cultural, like there is something inherently wrong with American (and possibly all Anglo culture) that produces such spoiled, immature, girls. I'm pretty sure that this same good man, had he grown up in Continental Europe, would have a loving girlfriend or wife and would be recognized for what he is; a good man.

Answer #2

It's a simple answer. American society has produced individuals with low attention spans who view boredom as a living hell. The result is that American women want to constantly be entertained and a good man is not as entertaining as the bad boy. In other industrialized countries that you mentioned, people are not constantly excessively stimulated and so do not find good men boring the way American women do.

Answer #3

I think tv plays a big role in this. Americans watch more tv than anybody else in the world. There are so many reality tv shows and other crazy stuff that tells women that they can pout, stamp their feet and demand whatever they want in a man. Also, tv shows and movies in America show men as incompetent losers and shows women as being smart and independent. Even commericals on tv show this.


That's part of it, yes. But it goes deeper than the short attention span. Mass media tends to influence society in greater measure than we realize. If you look at Hollywood productions, who are the men that are portrayed as most desirable and always get the girls? It is certainly not the nice guys, but the bad boys who have a certain edge.



U-TUBE video-------?

According to many experts such as Dr. Laura Schlessinger and Jean Twenge, cycling through numerous sexual/hook up type of relationships (as we do here in America) can cause psychological damage to woman such as depression and anxiety to such an extent that American woman are likely to carry emotional baggage into their future relationships with men. This often makes it difficult for them to have healthy relationships with men. In most non Western cultures such as Latin America and Asia, there is no relationshipcycling, no hooking up (comparatively speaking).? Generally, when foreign girls date someone, its serious and long term towards marriage. In fact, its not uncommon that woman are still virgins into their 30?s in many foreign cultires (i.e especially the Philippines)? Emotional baggage is relatively absent with most foreign ladies because they don?t sleep with so many men as they progress into their adult hood (aka: hook up). Both Dr Laura and Dr Jean Twenge touch upon this fact in this box below: ?



Sadly, American culture teaches both men and woman to be whores. Perhaps such a statement sounds shocking? If you don?t believe me, then believe America?s leading social psychologist when she says:


?Another cultural-level manifestation of the narcissism epidemic in relationships is the trend toward ?hook ups,? aka ?friends with benefits,? and other commitment free relationships. Narcissists favor short-term relationships. That may help explain why hookups have become so popular. We cannot say for sure that one causes the other. All I can say is these are two trends that go along with each other. (Jean Twenge - Newsweek).


More experts comment about this dysfunctionality:?


One reason the fangs may come out quickly is that many women who have cycled through too many intimate relationships, shack-ups, and marriages, have developed a well of pain and disappointment. (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 51)

The cycle of meeting someone, falling in love, and breaking up is a formula for anxiety and depression (Generation Me, pg 111)

It was clear to me that we?re turning a generation of kids who don?t know how to have a relationship (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 225)




Here is an article (written yet again by a woman) that covers the reasons why many woman in America are still single. This article seems to be a mirrir reflection of these other female experts I quote on this site.


1)     You?re angry - Female anger terrifies men. (Feminists are angry)

2)     You?re shallow - you are looking for someone tall. Or rich. This is the thinking of a teenaged girl. And men of character do not want to marry teenaged girls. Because teenage girls are never happy. And they never feel like cooking, either.

3)     You?re a slut - Hooking up with some guy in a hot tub on a rooftop is fine for the ladies of Jersey Shore -- but they're not trying to get married.

4)     You?re selfish - If you're not married, chances are you think a lot about you. Sometimes you think about how marrying a wealthy guy -- or at least a guy with a really, really good job -- would solve all your problems.




Reality of the US dating scene


I want to start off by requoting one of the first paragraphs I came across at Winston?s Happier Abroad website when I first encountered it. It really struck a cord with me when I read it:

?In the US it seems that every decent-looking female is either taken, super picky, or not even looking, leaving a large percentage of single males out of luck. They also carry baggage, and are jaded, cynical and unfeeling, lacking the positive qualities of the feminine. To make matters worse, they believe that they don't even need men, thus you are unwanted and unnecessary to them. Somehow, they seem to be "programmed" to reject and disqualify nearly every guy they meet. It's gotten so bad that it's not even worth your time to try anymore. The choices just aren't there. Thus, America has become a "dysfunctional dating hell" beyond words for men.?


I don?t think any truer words have ever been said regarding the American dating scene for men. I think that the main reasons for this is that woman in the US don?t need men. It has been deeply instilled in our woman via the culture of feminism. Feminism has also taught American woman to be disdainful of men and to subconcioulsy view men as predatory and dangerous which makes them stand offish to meeting strangers in public. Dr Laura Schlessinger talks extensively about these facts with American woman in her books as do many other credentialed and well respected relationship experts and social psychologists. Dr Laura?s quotes on this subject are listed further down below in this article and also in the ?research? section of this site. But in reality, we don?t necessarily need Dr Laura or any other experts to tell us about these truths. One can simply see these differences for themselves by simply comparing dating profiles of American woman vs Foreign woman.See this comparison here:? . In this dating profile comparison chart, one can notice how American woman dating profiles will often say ?no creeps?,? ?no stalkers?, or ?no bullshitters?. Unfortunately, as the American research shows, feminism has taught American woman to subconscioulsy view men in a disdainful and predatory way. In adddition, the American woman dating profiles are loaded with financial key words that reflect their perverse focus on a man?s career, money, and materialism. Such statements are completely non existent with foreign woman dating profiles. Lastly, you will clearly notice that American woman dating profiles usually contain a long list of demands. Foreign woman profiles do not, and in fact often say ?looking for a man who will accpet me for who I am?. Most guys find this difference in attitude with the foreign dating profiles very refreshing and sincere. The other reason for American woman developing such bad attitudes in the dating scene is the sheer gender imabalances in the US that heavily favor the woman which allows them to become choosy and picky to the point of developing spoiled attiutudes. More on this below in the next section.?


The rise in Narcissism with many American woman


In the research section of this site, Ive documented proof that American women are becoming more and more narcisistic. Social psychologist Jean Twenge has discussed the results of her and Gene Campbell?s research that has proven this fact. A direct result of their research resulted in this online news article ?.See this link


A perfect example of this narcissism comes from Mark Edward Davis?s E book at where he shares some of his dating experiences he had with American woman:

??As I went out with a dozen more women ? some irritating themes kept arising. I had one tell me with a condescending swagger, "I've been asked out by many men. If I went out with you, what kind of date would you take me on?" What? Is this a high school talent show and the women are hosting a panel of judges like on American Idol? I couldn't believe the in your-face arrogance! But this was not the first or last time I would detect this type of attitude. The common theme with dating American women was, "Listen, mister, I make good money and I drive a nice car already. What else are you bringing to the table?"



Comments I found on a message board about the US dating scene


?Women who are in there 30's and single tend to be 4 things.
1. Very jaded...
2. A single mother with lot's of Drama in her life
3. A single women who who has a mile long list of who she is looking for which you don't picture into.
4. You don't make enough money for her to date you.?




99.99 percent of guys in America CANNOT simply go out and pick up a date any time they want to, like they show in sitcoms. In reality, most guys are limited by their clique's social contacts, which they have to rely on to meet prospective dates. So if their cliques do not have an extended network that can introduce them to single women who are interested in them, then those guys are out of luck. If you look up polls about couples in America, you find that most of them met through friends or back in school. They didn't just "go out and find each other. Online personals don't usually work out.
We are talking mainstream guys, not misfits.




Also keep in mind that there are vast numbers of mainstream men in America who are single and dateless, but who do not complain about it. They merely focus on their job and work and try to forget about their loneliness. I'm sure you've met those types. We all have. Such men will tend to agree with our claims as well. So you see, there are many mainstream men suffering too. They just are not vocal about it. They just focus on work instead.





The Gender Imbalance that works against American men



1) As per Jean Twenge, one of America?s leading social psychologists:


?There are actually thousands more single young men than women in America. Between the ages of 25 and 39, for every 1 unmarried woman there are? 1.2 unmarried men.The truth is that its single men who should be anxious and complaining ?(Jean Twenge Generation Me, 113-114)


2) In addition, national statistics show that in the 25-40 age group, single men outnumber single woman by 10-20%?. This imbalance is HUGE!! ?


See the stats here ?




It results in Woman have the upper hand in the dating scene. Numbers do not lie- have a look at statistics across the country and you will see that overall, young men outnumber young women by somewhere around 11:10. In some places it is 12:10 or more. Add to this the fact that Hollywood brainwashes young women that they deserve rich and handsome young husbands with big cars and great careers and houses, and the fact that 20% of sexy hunks with money and good looks get 80% of the women, and you have a recipe for a disaster for a simple young man who just wants a date. He can't get one because numbers and statistics are not in his favor. Social and demographic trends are not in his favor. The Puritanical culture of not talking to strangers is not in his favor. In other words, he is behind the eight ball when it comes to dating.

However, the above cold facts are not known to the average American Joe. So when he has trouble finding a date (at least one that he would find attractive), he is told that he is the problem. He is told that he lacks social skills to pick up women and needs to work on himself, that he needs to get a better job and improve his appearance, lose weight and develop confidence, pump some iron, or take a karate class etc. All this is a direct result of the bad demographics in the USA.

The solution to the problem is simple- the surplus of men should go to places on Earth where there is a shortage of men. We must export the attractiveness (and good reputation) of the American male to global markets where they are in demand rather than depending on the domestic markets alone. If that is being a loser, (as the stereotype goes) than any export company that tries to find better markets for its products is a loser, too. Can you imagine someone writing an email to a large global company such as Apple or IBM with billions in sales around the world and saying something like this:

?You loser, what's wrong with the good old American market? Why can't you find an American customer? What?s wrong with you??


?Hey what's wrong with American investors? Why sell our treasury bills to the Chinese and Saudis??

As it happens, an American Citizen ( of any race, age and looks) is in greater demand in many countries than he is at home where he is surplus merchandise. Men need to take advantage of marketing themselves on the global scale where they are in much higher demand.

?In South American countries, as men continue to migrate to the Upper Tier countries, they leave behind an ever-increasing female-to-male ratio. The pressure to compete for the available men forces the ladies to stay sharp and in-shape. It's simply a matter of supply and demand. In Latin America there is an overabundance of single Latin women (reports range from 3-6 women for every man)?. (


?In American gyms, there are always a lot more men than women working out to stay buff and impress the opposite sex. In the Lower Tiers countries like South America, it?s just the opposite: The gyms are full of women?not men?working hard to stay in shape, so they can stay in the game and compete. In such a competitive atmosphere, even beauty and a shapely figure are not enough to win the men they seek, so women master the art of seduction. In the process, they develop wonderfully friendly, warm personalities that make men feel very much appreciated.? (

Try it and you will see what I mean. Go to two cities- Moscow and Manila. You will see more young women on the streets than young men. Always. And guess what else you will see? You will notice that the women try to look better, they behave in a sweeter manner, they try and be nice to guys because if they are not nice, another woman will whisk the guy away from her. Ya see, overseas the tables are reversed! Unlike in the states, single men are in huge demand!!

You will notice that instead of steely, suspicious supercilious looks that you get from women in the US, or, no looks at all, your appearance as a man on the streets of Moscow or Manila will attract curious, friendly and warm expression of interest from young ladies all over. They will be asking you questions, flirting with you, and saying yes to a dinner invitation.

So, why are they so nice? Most Americans falsely assume that its because the ladies think you have money. Perhaps with a small minority of woman, this may be a significant factor. But with most, it?s simply because good men are hard to find over there. The gender imbalances being far more single woman than men (just the opposite situation of the US ),? means that the men can get a girlfriend any time they want, and at any age. They do not need to exercise, take classes in improving social skills (such as with pick up artists), they don?t need to dress well or join clubs. Simply put, the men are the ones who do the choosing.


Flirtation study names U.S. women ?world?s least flirtatious? (almost). Only Ecuador?s women flirt less


U Tube clip about this study

(Note what the American ladies say and the way they respond when interviewed about this in this video. It just serves to confirm this study?s conclusion)


This is also one of the biggest reasons why the US is one of the worst dating scenes in the entire world for men. Most men don?t realize this because they havent traveled and dated abroad. When I traveled overseas, I noticed that woman are making eye contact and giving me flirtatious signals. I never experience anything remotley like this here at home in the US. Woman not only don?t flirt in the US, they don?t need men. (See expert opinion that proves this fact in our research section)

?American women are the ?least flirtatious? in the world, with the exception of those from Ecuador, according to a global study of online flirting.

They are less than half as a likely as women from Spain, the world?s most flirtatious, to make the first approach to a member of the opposite sex. Women in Anglo-Saxon countries are generally far less flirtatious than those in Latin ones.  ?Maybe it is their Puritan heritage?, wonders Lloyd Price. The average Spanish woman initiates 1.33 contacts with a man per month ? more than double the figure for women in the U.S. (0.63)



Internet Forum Comments I collected on this subject


?In America men feel invisable to women. Women in the US don't flirt with men, smile at men or even make eye contact with men. Thank God not all women in the world are like this! Men can go to Thailand, Philippines, eastern Europe, Russia and South America and have women flirt with them and smile at them and make them feel like they are desired by women. When it comes to dating, in America, women do the choosing. But in the Philippines, Thailand, eastern Europe, Russia and South America, men do the choosing! What a difference location makes!?




?I find that American women will look in the opposite direction when passing me without making any eye contact AT ALL. In addition, only a select few will return a hi or hello and even that is forced. This is part of the overall paranoia American women have about men. Feminism drills it into them that men are potential rapists or abusers and this seeps into the psyche of the women who are on "creepy guy" alert at all times. Just browse American dating profiles and see how many American woman profiles mention the word creep such as ?Im looking for a non creepy guy?.




?How true! American women avoid eye contact with men at all costs! If you do make eye contact with them, they immediately look away. Other guys I know, have said the same thing. This occurs anywhere in public places, like bookstores, grocery stores, shopping malls and health clubs.?



?How are you supposed to approach women in America, when they have that look on their face that says, "don't talk to me or try to approach me?.




?That's all part of the culture shock of travelling to other countries. We are so used to being ignored and demonized here at home that when we travel out of the country we have to make adjustments because "we're not in Kansas anymore". This includes getting over the fact that if you say "hello" to a foreign woman your chances of getting a dirty look or nasty comment are slim to none. The "bitch shield" on women pretty much only exists in North America and to some extent, the west.?




?I randomly got chatting to a Filipina on yahoo today. It was fairly casual, but then she said "Let me show you something" and requested for me to see her webcam. When I accepted, she held up to the camera a piece of paper that had "I LIKE YOU" written on it. No one told her to do this, she did it out of her own sense of creative feelings. You would NEVER get this kind of sentiment from a Western woman. See this is the kind of stuff that makes us Western guys never ever be able to go back to our native women.?





American men make the ERRONEOUS assumption that all woman around the world are basically the same


Throughout most of my single life, I've always had an attraction to foreign women and spent most of my life dating foreign born woman. From my experiences, (with some exception to small town country woman) , I have found foreign women to be more humble, more natural, more genuine, more authentic, more down to earth, more appreciative, and more accommodating, and especially far less materialistic. And foreign woman do not have a sense of entitlement like is so common with woman in the West. But it wasn't until I traveled and dated overseas that I found out just how vast these differences between American and foreign women really were.



Unfortunately, we all tend to have a strong subconscious assumption that for the most part, besides speaking a different language and having different customs, that women?s basic behaviours and attitudes are pretty much the same the world over. This is a HUGELY wrong?? assumption that most men seem to make. While there are some things that woman the world over do have in common, there are many critical things that they DO NOT have in common and this is of HUGE significance when it comes to the dating scene for men. One consistent theme we see when going abroad is that the woman overseas are generally of better quality in many ways. For starters, other countries do not suffer the unhealthy obesity epedemic like we do here in the states. Then personality wise, woman abroad are far more genuine, authentic , approachable, pleasing, sweet, tender, and feminine (feminine = shy,blush, or even giggle when you flirt with them). When was the last time you saw a woman in America giggle or blush??? Their femininity that they once had prior to the 60?s is now completely gone. In addition, it?s very easy to start a conversation with woman abroad because they are very interested in talking with men even if those men are strangers. There is no fear of men as strangers like there tends to be here in the US. And because they are more down to earth, conversations tend to flow much more naturally and smoothly. And they usually look up to you when you talk or flirt with them. You don?t feel demonized for flirting with or complimenting a girl like you are made to feel when doing these things in the US. (And this kind of thing can easily be misconstrued as sexual harrassment in the states and get you thrown in jail!) Overseas, you at least feel like you are ?in the Game?,? which is far more than many American men can say about their own standing within the US dating scene of today.


The dating scene is not the only thing that improves when you go abroad. Its also your overall mental health and the way you feel about yourself, especially for men, because for men, having 1000?s of easily obtainable gorgous sweet woman all wanting to be with you has a drastic impact on your self esteem and sense of self worth.


?the macho orientation of other non western cultures teaches woman to cherish their womanhood, and gives priority to the well being of the male of the family: ?Take care of your husband? is an early lesson taught on these cultures.? This creates a culture in which women are kind, warm, and very nurturing?and interested in treating you like a prince!?(




?Tainted by feminism and materialism, many American women not only expect a lot from their men, they don?t want to give very much in

return. Instead of appreciation, many cultivate the popular ?bitchy?(or nagging) attitude that many American guys have become so accustomed to.? (





?Unless you have traveled you don?t know whats out there. The differences with the woman are astounding.?




Another post at dating site message board

?The last three years of being on the American dating market - made me realize it isnt for me at all. All the time I spent abroad with the military- I know there is better behavior, and I wont settle for the drama and prattle. And gladly didnt. Get a language, and get out - see the world, your love life will be much happier for the trip.? (


Another post at dating site message board

I?ve met a few foreign women in real life and online, and the main thing I have found (And im bound to offend someone with this statement) that foreign women were less spoiled, and more understanding of lifes hardships. I find too many American women to be spoiled brats who are superficial and shallow, and in the long run care about one thing. Money. If i had my ultimate choice I would only date forieng women. But its not a realistic choice in a small town in the middle of nowhere. (

Consider this excerpt from Mark Davis of European Connections as he talks about his experience in Latin America

?We went to different dance clubs each night and spent a lot of time with many beautiful women. hey were very different from the others I'd just been dating in the States. It was something about their culture and appreciation of men that grabbed my attention. Everything they did, said, asked was about me first and foremost. When I was with one of these bronze beauties, the questions were about me: my life, likes, interests, experiences. They would continually gauge my state of mind and body ? was I hungry, bored, or thirsty? They wanted to know so they could respond in kind.When I was with one of these women, I was their world ? even if it was for only that hour. The way they view beauty is unique. It is something they have to work for each day. They are mindful of how they dress, put on makeup, their style, posture, physical fitness, and presence. It is work for them and they just wanted to know that it was appreciated and noticed. To give a sincere complement about some specific attribute will make them light up like a Christmas tree. It seemed to make their efforts to be beautiful all worthwhile. To enjoy being with these women was effortless. I never felt self-conscious. I was embraced like the man of the hour. And it truly was their pleasure.?


More excerpts from Mark Davis of European Connections as he talks about his experiences with foreign woman for which I have also experienced as true

?In her fourth letter to me she asked a profound question. It's a question that makes all of this very simple. She asked, "What would you like a woman to do every day, to act or be, for you to feel happy?" What would I like for a woman to do for me every day to make me feel happy? Wow. That blew me away. Have you ever had an American woman ask you that question??


? The second thing that impressed me was the way they respected men and seemed genuinely curious about me and my life. Hey, we all need an

ego boost now and then. Frankly, we can feel beat down in the dating scene at home and sometimes it can be strategic to receive such complementary letters from gorgeous women.?




Differences in Humility



More often than not, the attitude of an attractive American woman is ?Hell yea Im hot?! Just go visit any singles bar or club scene in America today to see this for yourself.?

But a foreign woman will often deny her beauty. In fact, when you tell a foreign girl (especially a filipina) that she is beautiful or pretty, most of the time she will deny it and say ?no Im not? or she may say ?there are other girls much more pretty than me?. When I asked my filipina friend why filipinas usually respond this way, she said the following ?Out of humility or shyness, plus we?re brainwashed for our heads not to get big if someone is complementing to moderate we sort of pass the glory to others?. 

The reason for these differences is due to the rise of narrcissism in American culture (see the research section for proof). Social psychologist Jean Twenge repeatedly states that the rise? in narcissism in America was mostly measured among the woman, not so much the men.


In her book, Jean Twenge states ?In many ways, humility is the opposite of narcissism. Some people misconstrue humility as bad, equating it with shame or self-hatred. Humility is not the same as humiliation. True humility is a strength - the ability to see or evaluate yourself accurately and without defensiveness (notice we said ?accurately? not ?negatively?). Overall, humble people are more connected to others. ?When you don?t concentrate on pumping up the self, it is easier to relate to other people and the wider world. (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 283)


And often you will see foreign woman profiles that say? ?Looking for a man to accept me for who I am?. Compare this sweet humble attitude of the foreign lady profiles to that of most American lady profiles of? "I need, I want, must have, (you) must, job, income, etc.?


A few internet posts I came across also comments on this humblness


?I must say on sites such as dateinasia where you rate your appearance many Asian women will say they are average or below average and still look better than many American women that say they are attractive or very attractive on their profiles at American dating sites. Meh.?


?What I find best about the people here (and the women) is the nearly complete lack of pretension. Even if you go to an upscale mall in the Philippines,? maybe 5 out of 100 girls at most have that "I'm too good for everyone around me" look. In my home NYC, you'll be lucky to find 1 girl out of 100 like that?


I believe that this difference in humblness is another reason why foreign woman make such quality marriage partners with only a 20% divorce rate compared to America?s 50-60% divorce rate.



Foreign woman are generally more compassionate and empathetic to others? hardships and sufferings


It's a proven sociological fact that poorer people tend to be more kind, compassionate and friendly than middle class and above people due to their need to be more interdependent with others to get by. As women from non industrialized foreign countries tend to come from poorer society?s, they tend to have these better social qualities.??


?Poor people are quicker than middle-class or rich individuals to recognize the suffering of others and to show compassion, according to a new study."These latest results indicate that there's a culture of compassion and cooperation among lower-class individuals that may be born out of threats to their well-being," study author and social psychologist Jennifer Stellar said in a university news release."Upper-class individuals appear to be more self-focused?






The HUGE Approachability difference between American and foreign woman?



While I?ll admit that the the personification of many American women below is exagerrated,? it does have a grain of truth to it.?




A view into the mind of an American woman when she is being approached by a man whom she doesn?t know?

????? ????



While the following examples below are some of the worse or more extreme examples that often happen to men when approaching a lady at a bar or singles scene in America, it nevertheless reflects the problems that are out there today with many American women. When approached, especially if the lady is attractive, many American women will often: 


1)     Flat out ignore him  (10%-15% of the time)

2)     Turn away from him, and laugh ?at him? with her friends at his supposed "lame" attempt to talk to her. (10% of the time)

??????????? * Ive witnessed this numerous times. Apparently many American women get some kind of egotistical thrill by humiliating men in front of their friends. There

????????????? are many YouTube videos by men who complain about this sick narcissistic behavior by so many American women. (This kind of sick narcissism is

????????????? completely non existent overseas!). 

????? 3)?? Put off a vibe of total indifference (90% of the time)

????? 4)?? Put off a vibe that shows that she thinks she is too good for him (60% of the time)

????? 5)? Display body language that clearly shows that she wishes that the guy would just leave her the hell alone! (70% of the time)


*Again, these behaviours seem to mostly occur with the attractive women, not so much with the unattractive or overweight ones.


1-5 above just covers how woman treat men in the bar scene. But what about in public like at the malls and stores? Well, it?s still really bad when approaching woman at these places too. Winson Wu of happier abroad describes this issue best :


Trying to meet and approach young women in the US often feels awkward and rude, as if you are violating some type of boundary.  They prefer not to acknowledge your existence if you?re not in their clique. They are among the most cliquish, closed, and anti-stranger women in the world, and emanate an ?unapproachable force field? around them.  This anti-stranger force field/bubble says to men, "Don't mess with me.  I'm unapproachable.  I don't talk to strangers. If I don't know you, you have no business talking to me unless you are lost and need directions.? (Unless of course, you are or look like Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt.). ?You can sense some kind of shield as if you are violating some type of boundary. If they find out that you are speaking to them for purposes other than asking directions, they suddenly get defensive, upset, and act as though you?ve violated their boundaries.  Attempting to penetrate their bubble elicits a negative response which causes an energy drain on men that discourages them from trying again.  That?s why most guys in the US don?t have the guts to approach women.  It?s unnatural, creepish, anxiety-provoking, discouraging and usually leads to no real result. What many guys, especially the ones involved in the PUA (Pick Up Artist) movement don't understand about the fear of approaching women is that the reason they are afraid is not because they lack guts. It's because they can sense that the girls they want to meet do NOT want to be approached, so that to do so would be rude and violating.? Not to say that there are no friendly women in America, but there is definitely something peculiar that makes them and Americans in general unnaturally closed and paranoid.  So the main problem is that they won?t meet you if they don?t know you, but yet you can?t get to know them cause they won?t meet you, thus creating a CLOSED LOOP against someone who wants to meet them.  And that just plain sucks, to put it simply.


In fact, it?s widely agreed among well-traveled playboys that the US has among the most unapproachable and anti-social women in the world. 


What sucks about America, despite its many ideal qualities, is that the only truly friendly open women are the large ones, while the non-overweight ones are generally stuck-up and unapproachable (though in many areas, such as LA, even ugly girls are rude and uppity).


On the other hand, in the rest of the world, women feel flattered and react warm and sweetly when you approach them, whether they are interested or not, whether they are available or not.  They don?t get offended or see it as creepish. Many often giggle or blush in the process (how many American women nowadays blush or giggle?). In fact, the difference in approachability is greater than the average American who?s never left their country can imagine.  Even if you approach a female movie star, model, or married woman in Russia, she never gets offended or defensive at your initiation like American women do, so you never feel like you are a creep for the attempt. It?s a total refreshing contrast.  That?s how ?real women? are, and it?s truly feminine. Basically, a guy is allowed to be himself abroad, rather than suppress who he is. But most guys reading this? wouldn?t know this difference until you?ve left the Puritanical ?Matrix? of the US, otherwise you have nothing to compare to. 


To try to put it into words, an approachable girl looks at ease, relaxed, open and friendly. It's in her face, body language and aura too. She makes eye contact with others, smiles back at people, and has an open body posture. An unapproachable girl, on the other hand, has a closed narrow vibe and look on her face. She is uptight, serious, focused, does not make eye contact with others, and has a "don't bother me" look on her face. When you try to muster the courage to talk to her, you will feel a cold chill and an alarm will go off in you that says, "DO NOT! NOT ALLOWED! INAPPROPRIATE!" It has nothing to do with guts or bravery at all.?



The internet is full of men complaining about the unapproachability of American woman:?


This one taken from the message board at

Try taking the stigma of sexual harrassment out of the American way of life and dating would be sooooo much better. I work in Europe and the US and find that women in the US seem to have an evil glare if you look their way...mind you not all. But in Europe they are upset if you don't comment about the way they look. Maybe that is more of an attraction than anything.


This one taken from single

?American women also have the most unattractive feeling of self-entitlement.  The difference between how hot a girl thinks she is and how quality she actually is huge in America.  What American guy hasn?t had the experience of being in a bar and approaching a marginally attractive girl and tried to say hi to her only to have her be extremely rude for no good reason??



??????????? Winston Wu?s of happier abroad talking about his experience in Russia


?????????? That afternoon, when the tour was over, they dropped us off at the Hermitage, this gigantic museum that was like a labyrinth inside. Near the end of the

?????????? tour, this tall skinny attractive brunette with a totally cute smile made eye contact with me, and I with her. She seemed interested in me, so we

?????????? approached each other. She was a tourist too, with a video camera (Russians with video cameras must come from rich families obviously!). She

?????????? started speaking to me and asked if I was Japanese. I said no, that I was American. And then from there we had a friendly cute conversation, even

?????????? though she barely spoke any English. I could tell she was interested in me, so I told her where I was staying at and asked if I could telephone her later.

???????? ??She said yes and we exchanged phone numbers. Wow, a gorgeous girl like that has NEVER approached me out of nowhere in the USA! I was stunned!

?????????? Why is it this easy in Russia? I was wondering if she wanted something from me, but I don't think so. From what I learned, she is obviously from a

?????????? rich family since she has a small electronic camcorder, was able to afford to go to a $20 ballet (most Russians make $50 a month), has been to Japan

?????????? before, and has braces too (which most Russians can't afford). She obviously seemed to like me too, since she was very flirty and friendly with me. I

?????????? can't believe it was that easy to meet her here. In America, this would be almost impossible.



These unapproachability problems are part of the insensitive and jaded attitudes that feminism has instilled to some degree or another in most of our woman today in America, as well as the innate premise and idea that woman generally don?t need men. Most of us are unaware of this on a conscious level. It exists mostly at a subconscious level because it?s part of our American culture that has taught woman to be this way. One phrase that Dr Jean Twenge used in her book to describe this lack of awareness is ?..?A fish doesn?t know it?s in water?!? This unsweet egotistical type of behavior by many American women in the singles/bar scene today is one of the main things that finally pushed me over the edge to become an ardent activist for helping men realize they don't have to deal with this kind of insensitive attitude. When I traveled overseas, one of the biggest differences I noticed is that girls do not have a unapproachable force field around them, they openly flirt and have a natural relaxed air about them. Foreign women simply aren?t as guarded, they?re more kinder, sweeter, and friendly due to the environment that they were rasied in. Men who havent traveled simply wont have a point of reference for comparing foreign woman to their local woman. If all American men had experienced dating abroad at some point in their lives, they?d realize how much better their dating options are overseas! But most guys don?t know this so they end up marrying an? American girl and then ultimately pay the price down the road through either a miserable marriage or through divorce.


In fact, America has the highest divorce rate in the entire world . It stands at 50-60%. Of the other 40-50% who don?t divorce, studies show (see our research section) that at least half of marriages in America are unhappy. Men must come to realize that they have better love and dating options outside America, where women will treat them right, where woman are still soft and sweet, and still act shy and blush and giggle when being flirted with. Compare this to America where the guy approaching a lady for conversation is more likely to be viewed as a threat (someone please call the police on this creep!) or a potential predator. For example, I can't tell you how many times I?ve been talking to a girl at a bar or club only to watch her friend(s) pull her away from me and say, "My friend doesn't want to talk to you" or "Sorry, but she is coming with us". This makes men feel bad, it makes us men feel like as if we are some kind of predatory criminals to be feared. For proof of this, see our research section of our site where we quote Dr Laura Schlessinger as stating in her books that feminism has taught woman to subconsciously view men as ?dangerous?. Another difference is that overseas, the hottest women (even model quality women!) will react in a humble appreciative manner when you approach them! They actually appreciate a compliment, unlike in the states where women more often than not will twist or perceive it into a negative light, such as a man?s "lame" or "cheap" or "desperate? pick up attempt to ?get in her pants?. And I believe that it is this kind of negative subconscious disdain for men as dangerous and predatory that makes American men generally uncomfortable with approaching American woman in public. Men can sense this vibe and they realize American woman generally do not want to be approached. This is completely different overseas. Unlike in America, while I was overseas, I felt completely at ease to approach the woman there. Woman abroad put off a vibe of receptiveness about being approached. I never felt like I was being viewed as a creep or a potential sex predator or being a bother to them simply by approaching them for simple conversation. Oh, and lastly, when overseas, you don?t see packs of woman on the dance floor doing their fake gyrating lesbian acts whose sole purpose is to tease men and to communicate the fact that they don?t need them.


Foreign men know this difference is real. See this post at plenty of dating site


?Well I am also one of those foreigners and whilst I accept cultural changes and social activities are very different from either Europe or the PacificYou are right rider1083 In Europe giving a compliment and also bantering play is acceptable even encouraged by the women whereas in the USA to do so is to open doors which should not be opened. Most of the time people in the USA do not know how to accept a compliment perhaps because compliments are so few and far behind.?


Another post at Plenty of confirming this approachability issue

?Here - a hello will get you a cold chill, indifference, ignored, or a guarded prefunctory and cursory greeting back with no feed back to larger conversation. No kitsche trite pick up lines - just a simple 'Hello' It goes nowhere in this culture?



Below is a sample U tube video of other men talking about how American woman tend to be unfreindly and unapproachable: (see segment 4:09 to 5:10)



Internet post that describes this ?MEN ARE CREEPS? mentality that American woman have when approached by men


I am personally sick and tired of this " all men are creepy" attitude of american women. If i find them physically attractive i am a weirdo and creepy. if i ask them what their name is then i must i have some motive to hurt them. which is untrue.

i currently live in west L.A. Brentwood city. very rich spot next to beverly hills and so forth. super rich here. and guess what...
if you show any interest in a woman here including if you find her physically attracitve. she will think potential stalker who want sex. as if sex is really bad.
so they run as fast as they can because they are so so scared of men that are sexually interested in them. again going back to the creepy mentality they

Men are creepy if he asks the new lady where she lives. "oh no, he is planning on finding me at my home so he can hurt me."


If a man is behind a woman to long on the same side of the street and he looked at her in anyway. he is instantly a stalker.

This is how women think in america. I feel sorry for foreign women that live here in the states to long. They obtain the same mentality and begin to think the same way about any man. quite sad !!!.

Again, i am very tired of this image forced upon me as a potential attacker or rapist.
and it's my job to prove to her that i am not dangerous. fuck that shit !!!.

I am now working really really hard to go and live where things are very peaceful and normal. this creepy mentality is NOT natural. I want peace
in my life and a normal environment where it is okay for me to be a man and pursue, chase, and flirt.


That's the culture in the USA, no one trusts one another anymore like they did in the 50's.




Below are 3 sample Fan mails we received here at happier abroad from foreign men visiting America regarding this ?unapproachability? issue:


1) ?American women are the most spoiled, unfriendly, unapproachable and anti-social women in the world!?


2) ?It's hard to meet women when they are unapproachable and give off that vibe that says " don't approach me unless I already know you!"


3)?Since I came here WOW my dating life has dramatically decreased to the point that the confidence that I had at the beginning was shattered. It is?

?? almost unbelievable how unapproachable women are here. When you approach a girl here she feels like you are going to rape her. Even if she finds???

?? you cute, she feels like you should be the one to go to her because she is so perfect and even if you do that; she plays mind game with you. You?

? call her, she is either very busy ( on weekends ) or she does not answer. I have never experienced this before, and frankly I never thought that a

? country such USA could be like this?.


4) ?foreign women are the best, you just have to meet them in THEIR country. they are so so different friendly, social, open.

??? they can change super fast and become unapproachable because of the american environment. Woman aren't bitchy everywhere, just typically in???

??? usa.?

In my experience with? traveling and dating abroad, it was so uplifting to see how much sweeter and kinder foreign women behaved towards me in bars and singles scenes. For the first time, I saw how women were truly meant to be - sweet, soft, kind, considerate, feminine, and having a very open and receptive vibe about them. The indpependent feministic? attitude that says ?I don?t need you? is totally non existent abroad.?


Could this ease of approachability as shown in the U tube video below happen with an American woman?

In this video below, a guy is trying to get to know a girl in the car next to him by offering a coffee. She says no, so he gives her one. Then he demands to get her phone number, she says no... see what happens next, LOL SmileLove it!!

Try doing this in America. More than likely, she will be fearful of you and get scared and drive off. Our American society teaches woman to be fearful and paranoid of men. Yet this subconscious fear of men as dangerous and predatory is uncalled for. Dr. Laura Schlessinger is quoted in her book (see our tresearch section for more info) as saying that our culture teaches our woman to subconsciously view men as dangerous. But Overseas, this fear of men as strangers is not existent and woman do not feel threatened by men they meet in public. Based on my own international travel experiences and those of other men who have traveled abroad, this U tube video above is a great example of how easy it is to approach foreign woman. Note her lack of fear. She doesn?t view these men as creeps like many American woman would in the exact same scenario. Note how pleasant she is to them. This is a perfect example of why there are no such thing as pick up artists in other countries. Men in other countries simply don?t need them. Men in these countries don?t need help to meet woman because the woman in other countries are so at ease when it comes to being appoached by male strangers in public.?


Internet quotes on the differences between Foreign and American woman



Quotes from an internet forum


Remember that both men and women are largely products of their immediate environment and surroundings, just like any other animal. The reason women in foreign countries tend to be more "down to Earth" is because they have lived in and experienced poverty, disease, famine, war, loss, etc ... they have known what it is to STRUGGLE, they have seen the world for the dog-eat-dog place that it is. They end up developing more positive personality traits over time as a result of being "refined" by their up-bringing, culture, and parents. Speaking of parents, most foreign women grew up under the stabilizing influence of their father ... the same can't be said about most Western women. Religion is also still pretty relevant in most foreign countries and I believe that is a big factor that contributes to their more positive/pleasant demeanor.

On the other hand, Western women are probably the most pampered, privileged, entitled, and spoiled group to have ever walked the face of the Earth! The media, corporations, special interest groups work in tandum to promote, inflate, and perpetuate the typical Western woman's ego and delusional fantasies. Western women are told they are all perfect little angels that deserve the world and more, the "average men" are simply not worthy of having the "privilege" of being in their presence.

They are spoon-fed on a Hollywood diet of propaganda, subliminal messages, and romantic chick-flick bullshit from an early age to such an extent that by the time they are 30, 35, 40 most of them are STILL clinging onto the fantasy of "I just have to hold out a little longer and Mr. Right, with his millions and millions of dollars is going to come into my life, marry/rescue me, and we will live happily ever after in a giant mansion with three wonderful kids ... love WILL find me if I just wait a little longer!" ... Yes guys, Western women really can be THAT delusional.

And if all of this wasn't bad enough, Western women are increasingly being raised in the absence of their father, who either was ca$hed in by mommy in a divorce or was a one-night stand (a bad boy that "hit it & quit it" and was never seen again). Then there is religion/morality/values/etc ... these things are virtually non-existant in the West, with the "MTV culture" dominating the minds of the masses, and Western women are lapping it up like a sponge unhindered by any set of "rules", concrete or abstract.


What you promote you get more of. In the Western nations, the darker side of female nature is being promoted and encouraged while whatever redeeming female characteristics that were left are slowly but surely disappearing. In foreign countries the society still keeps a tight lid on female hypergamy (or at least tries to) and encourages "good" behavior (resisting the lure of the bad boy, being a good mother, respecting her husband, etc) which benefits everyone, including the woman.


American women talk this junk about game and swag which makes interactions very contrived and artificial. It seems like being sincere, natural, and down to earth is synonymous with being weak to American woman. You have to have game and show them what you got to be considered a real man.


The typical filipina understands what it is like to be hungry and to do without. She knows how to adapt and to adjust. She has a perspective that is not held by western cultures. She is much less materialistic and more tolerant and more patient. She understands the value of family and community. She appreciates the small things in life and she understands people. She understands the roles that men and women should play in a marriage. She has extraordinary interpersonal skills and communicates well - even though she is usually very shy and reserved in public. And she has a high level of morality, honesty and integrity. These characteristic are all a product of her environment and her culture and they make her very attractive to most men.





Testimonials from American men who have discovered the difference





?nice website. my story of leaving america. let me tell you about myself... my life in america was not too happy. i did not have a wife or gf. i did not get laid. i was depressed all the time. my life generally sucked. american women just wanted something that i didn't have. i'm attractive, but that just wasn't enough. a little shy, but it shouldn't have been that hard to find a young woman sooner. i decided something had to change. so i took a trip to south east asia at 25 and what can i say? wow! when i got there i got laid everyday with beautiful women. i did not even have to ask to get laid! that is how easy it was. in fact, i met my wife almost instantly after i moved here permanently. wow! something that seemed so impossible in america was instantaneous in thailand. what surprised me about the women was how much more feminine, younger and lovely the women here in asia are. the women actually behave like women! (not like men) they take great care of their appearance. everywhere i go i see stunningly beautiful women who smile at me! that is not an exaggeration. the difference between here and america is like night and day. america is truly an awful place for a man. i suggest you leave! today i live in thailand with a beautiful young wife and son. i think if i continued to live in america i would also have 20 years of loneliness.?


2) ??????? i really disliked living in the states. i don't think it was my problem not getting women. i think it is american women who are the problem. why is it so easy for me to find a mate here? it is like a night and day difference. american women wouldn't even look at me and i'm not that ugly. after many years of traveling back and forth and visiting many countries including china, indonesia, cambodia, & laos i decided to move for good. i really think i made the right move. i'm confident in that. my life is 10x happier here. i'm not depressed anymore. i'm great around women. i'm "THE MAN" here.


"Hi all, well my story is about the same as yours, but here it is anyway: for a long time I blamed myself for my lack of success with American women. So, I worked hard for many years to improve myself to the point where I would be worthy of a decent American woman. I got myself a Ph.D., then a job at an Ivy-league school, got myself into excellent physical shape, took up lots of cool hobbies like skiing, tennis, ballroom dance... and I was still getting rejected by women who had no business being picky! I had my epiphany when I was 33 and dating an overweight, 42-year-old, divorced mother who dumped me because I didn't have a "wild side". So then I did some traveling to (among other places) Hungary, the Czech Republic, and the Philippines, and beautiful young women couldn't keep their hands off of me! Dating is like real estate- the 3 most important factors are location, location, location!"


?When I'm in a country like Thailand or the Philippines, I know that I am desirable to the women there (I get reassured of that everyday). So even if I get turned down by a woman, she probably has a good reason to say no, and she will be flattered rather than act like I'm some creep. When I'm overseas, I don't subconsciously feel like I'm doing something wrong by flirting with a woman. What it boils down to, is that foreign women are an entirely different species than western women. If I had been told 2 years ago that my love shyness/social anxiety with women could be solved simply by changing the type of women that I was pursuing, I probably wouldn't have believed it. It's one of those things you have to experience to fully understand.?


I dont want to bunch all American girls into one big lump....BUT -- the majority of them due to culture or something act really snotty and stupid - like we?re not GOOD ENOUGH for them. i swear i went 12yrs in the bay area - and rarely found a girl who even batted an eye....and quite frankly i started to lower my own standards lower and lower....and for what?  The moment i traveled anywhere else - i found girls that would SINK any american girl that ignored i have a wife that turns heads left and right - but she is staring right into my eyes with love. Real love!



A Real Life Story that typifies the average American male?s dating experience abroad??


The author of describes what I myself also experienced when traveling abroad when he wrote the following story

?I was on a flight to Santa Cruz, Bolivia. I was taking a vacation of sorts, and spending some time with my cousins in Bolivia. My mother

and my aunt persuaded me to do them a big favor. My Bolivian cousin Enrique had received a visa to come to the USA. Since Enrique?s English was limited, and he had never traveled outside of Bolivia before, my job was to go to Bolivia, then travel with him and make sure he got to New Jersey safely.


My mother, knowing how frustrated I was with my love life, told me that the trip was also a good way for me to meet Bolivian women. And not coincidentally, all of my male cousins in Bolivia were known for being ladies men. I would always here stories from my aunts and even my own mother, about how many ladies were fawning for the attention of my male cousins in Bolivia. One of those cousins was Enrique. My aunt was always telling me that my cousin had a lot of sexy girlfriends back in Bolivia, while pointing out that I had none here in New Jersey. Everyone in my family casted me as the black sheep; The guy that couldn?t get the ladies. My aunt and even my own mother would tell me to ?go and learn from the Lady?s Man,? and now I had a chance.


After hearing all of my aunt?s stories about Enrique, I pictured him as very smooth and suave, confident and dominant?the living example of the Alpha Male I?d been reading about in the dating books. I hoped I could learn a few things from him. I also hoped he?d introduce me to some of his sexy, Bolivian female friends.


When I arrived at my cousin?s house, Enrique wasn?t there. But my female cousins, along with my uncle and my grandmother, were there to greet me. We had all gathered in the kitchen when Enrique finally walked in. ?Hey cousin, long time no see!? he said, in Spanish, giving me a hug and a handshake. I was happy to see him, but I was also shocked by his appearance. Not suave, certainly no Alpha Male, Enrique?s hair was sloppy, and his clothes were worn and faded. In fact, when I first met my cousin, I actually looked a lot better than he did! I was confused. Was this the lady?s man my family had told me about? Evidently, I thought, he knows how to seduce women. If he has such great success with hot women, he must. Some guys have it, some guys don?t right?


Determined to learn from him in the six weeks I was to spend in Santa Cruz before accompanying Enrique back to New Jersey, I told him I was single and wanted to meet cute girls. I asked my famous cousin to go out on the prowl with me and be my ?wingman.? Enrique agreed. We hit the malls, billiards rooms, clubs, parks, bus stops, Universities, restaurants?even the supermarkets?and we approached women everywhere we went.


And guess what? I kicked his ass New Jersey style! I completely annihilated the Bolivian Casanova! I was putting my local cousin to shame, a guy who is known in the family as a real ladies man. I was completely shocked by this. Not only was I getting great responses from the women, but I was blowing my cousin out of the water.


What I learned during that trip changed my life forever.


Every day in Bolivia, while taking a taxi or bus or just walking down the street, I found myself surrounded by beautiful slender women who took good care of themselves. What a contrast from New Jersey where so many women are overweight and have lost their physical appeal. And the ladies of Santa Cruz were kinder, too, and more feminine, possessing deeper family values then the women I dated in New Jersey. The Bolivian women are raised in a culture where they take pride in making a man feel great, while New Jersey girls are the total opposite. The women I dated in New Jersey hated cooking for a man. But all the women I dated in Bolivia loved to cook for me and also their own families! It was as if it was their duty to take care of me and make me feel special?and if they accomplished this, they felt like ?real women.? They took pleasure in showing their femininity both in public and in private.


After four weeks, I had about 40 phone numbers in my pocket, all from very attractive women. Three of these attractive girls were asking to be my girlfriend. I didn?t know which one to pick! All three girls were very attractive, friendly, and very feminine. All I could think was, ?Why hasn?t this every happened in New Jersey?? and ?Why, back

in New Jersey, the same caliber of women would not even give me the time of day??


Then, during my trip, something amazing happened. I was sitting in the central plaza in the middle of Santa Cruz with sexy, caramel-skinned, Brazilian Lana, who was studying at the University Gabriel Rene Moreno. We?d met in the plaza a few days earlier, and this was our third date, and now she was begging me to be her boyfriend! I was trying to

explain to her how I already made my choice. That Gabriela had won my heart. Lana was saddened by this, and I felt sorry?but what could I do? As I tried to console Lana, all of a sudden Gabriela, who was even sexier then Lana, sat down on the bench next to us. There I was, the guy who couldn?t get a date with a perfect 10 in New Jersey, with? two perfect 10s on each side, Lana to my right and my new, gorgeous girlfriend Gabriela to my left.


Caught red handed, I thought both girls would take turns slapping me, then leave me there on the park bench all alone to lick my wounds. But this was Bolivia?and things just don?t work that way there. Instead of yelling at me, these two beautiful girls started to argue about me, throwing insults at each other, but leaving me unscathed.


The whole incident really turned my world upside down. Two beautiful young Latin women arguing over me, ?Mr.New Jersey Loser.? What did this say about what the dating experts teach? How was it that this timid, mediocre, skinny guy was getting hot girls to fight over him? And with none of the attributes that the experts say you need: I wasn?t confident or cocky or witty. I didn?t ?move the crowd.? And I was certainly no Alpha Male! But in Bolivia, I was ripping the experts? advice to pieces. I was defying the laws of gravity?just by being myself! My shortcomings. didn?t matter here. Santa Cruz was an entirely different planet peopled with young, friendly, likeable, attractive women, all of whom seemed eager to meet me!


After Shirlena and I said our goodbyes, I got my last taste of Bolivian hospitality. I was preparing to board the plane taking me home to the United States, when one of the ticket agents asked if I had a girlfriend. ?Why do you ask?? I said. ?Well, if you stay in Santa Cruz, I have many single girlfriends who would be interested in a guy like you,? she replied.


I boarded the plane, buckled up, and relaxed, thinking about my wonderful time with the beautiful women I had met in Santa Cruz. At first my ego led me to believe that my dating results had improved because I had improved my technique with the ladies. I thought that somehow, I had improved by reading all of those dating and seduction

books, and that I would land in New Jersey with my new great powers. But once that airplane landed in New Jersey, I realized that I hadn?t improved?at least not in the eyes of North American women. In New Jersey, the girls still paid me no attention.


In the weeks after we landed in New Jersey, my cousin was very excited and happy. His American dream had just begun. He worked hard. His plan was to save enough capital so he could return to Bolivia in a few years, where he would build a small hostel and live a decent life. But he didn?t want to leave the U.S. until he?d dated a nice

American girl, particularly one who looked like Britney Spears! I wished him the best of luck?and went along with him for the ride. Together, Enrique and I approached?and were shot down by?so many Jersey-raised women that I lost count. All of these failed attempts confirmed my theory that my great success in Bolivia was due solely to the change in my geographic location, not to a change in my style or sophistication.


Even while we were striking out, I kept telling my cousin, ?It?s not your fault or my fault. It?s just the way it is here. And the truth is that Santa Cruz is a paradise for men, period. That?s why you, or any of my other cousins never had a problem finding a nice girlfriend all these years.?


?No, it?s not that,? Enrique insisted. ?I have the magic touch for American women. I?ve seen American movies; I will show you how it?s done.? While I knew that he couldn?t repeat what I did in Santa Cruz back home in New Jersey, my cousin?s big, macho ego got the best of him. He thought he could do what I hadn?t been able to do for twenty-five years, so I took him all over the Tri-State area. We went to malls, restaurants, clubs, bars, all over New Jersey and New York City.


After one year in the United States, going out every weekend, my cousin was completely devastated by the women he met here. His macho guy ego took such a terrible thrashing in North New Jersey, that he was not even a shell of his former Bolivian self. It was like watching a Pit Bull transformed into a Chihuahua.


Out of more than one hundred daytime attempts (not including clubs and bars), he only got three phone numbers. To top it off, the girls that gave him their numbers were all overweight. In Santa Cruz, my cousin would never approach a chubby girl, but after a year of not having a female companion and being rejected so many times, Enrique lowered his standards.


I started to realize that many men, including many of my personal friends had lowered their standards in this same manner. Because of this harsh dating situation the men settle for whatever they can get and the chubby women find themselves being validated by these men who have grown tired of chasing the attractive women so they settle for less attractive ones.


I was being rejected right along with my cousin, but I was used to this, because I had lived in the Garden State my whole life. But Enrique, who grew up in a paradise for men, could not adjust to his harsh new reality: New Jersey is a paradise for women, not men! It didn?t take long before he confessed that he wanted to return to his country. Although the money in the U.S. was good, he just couldn?t find an attractive female companion, and it was taking a toll on his attitude.


Ultimately, Enrique stayed three years, leaving for Bolivia with money in his pocket, but with his ego greatly wounded. He never returned to North America, and to this day he still shivers when I bring up his experiences with American women.


What Enrique and I learned from dating in each other?s country boils down to this: Environment is more important than seduction, looks, sophistication, education, Alpha Male traits, ?game,? charm, charisma, body language, pick-up lines, cockiness, or wealth. It?s great environments, not great men, that create great women and great results!

The reason I was having so much success with the ladies is because I was from the US. Even though I'm just a regular guy from New Jersey, with regular looks and a very regular bank account, these gorgeous Latina babes found me far more attractive than all the average local guys.Each one of the girls on my list would have been a 9 or a 10 in New Jersey, but here they're practically average.

So what was the secret? Well, I wish I could take credit for it, but the truth is I'm the exact same guy I always was. The difference is where I was in the third world, like in Latin America, Eastern Europe or South East Asia, the women haven't bought into all the materialism, careerism and feminism that so many women in the US and UK have bought into. So, they are not only content being a real woman, it's what they want most in life! They want to take care of their man, to make him happy and keep him happy! And it's important that they stay in the best shape possible and take care of themselves so they have the best shot at getting a man.

Not only are the women different, but for the first time in my life, the numbers are working for me instead of against me. Let me give you an example: In Latin America, a lot of the men die young due to war, violence or a tough life of hard labor. Also, many young men in their prime, leave for greener economic pastures to countries like the United States, Canada, and Australia, leaving behind millions of luckless ladies to battle fiercely over the men who stay behind. And in russia Forty million Soviet men died in the three cataclysmic events of the Soviet era (i.e. the political purges and World War II) creating a severe shortage if men for two generations of women.  The result is that there are more available women than men and it also means the women are very needy.

Secondly, my very average salary and very average education in the US actually put me in the top 1% of all men in Latin America, Eastern Europe or South East Asia, so they see me like women in the US or UK might see Sean Connery or Tom Brady.

These factors - the greater ratio of women to men, a traditional culture where the women want to love and respect their men and take care of them, and my first-world income and education - mean that suddenly the girls are fighting for a chance to date average guys like me! All the while, American women back home wouldn't even give me a second look! You can be below average in looks, shy and poor and these extraordinary women will be fighting one another to be at the front of the line.


Older ladies from Santa Cruz, Bolivia will also try to steal you away from the younger women. Many, are thin and take care of their looks. Unlike in

many Western countries, women in this city stay thin for a long time. Nonetheless, many are still single and may never find a husband in Bolivia,

where single men with economic stability are scarce. Whenever a foreign man enters Santa Cruz, a new catfight begins! I should know, they tangled

over Mr. Average Joe, yes, me!

This experience in Bolivia and the many subsequent trips I've made to Latin America, Eastern Europe and South East Asia, have validated my experience and conclusions"


Differences in weight, presentableness, and appearance standards


Differences in WEIGHT and DRESS STYLE






In regards to the obesity problem - I do have sympathy and understand that for many people, being overweight can?t always be helped, and it affects both men and women equally. Im not placing judgment on anyone with a weight issue. It is what it is. Statistics show that 70% of Americans are overweight. And by the time woman hit their 30?s, that figure is even higher! Most guys I know (probably about 99% of men) are not attracted to overweight woman. So what we have is a situation where 100% of the men are chasing after the top 25% of woman (the 25% who are not overweight). This is why the thin attractive ladies know they are in demand and hence they can afford to be very finicky and choosy and develop spoiled attitudes. They often develop what is commonly known as the ?bitch shield.? In a way, perhaps you can?t really blame them. It?s a natural response as a direct result of constantly being approached all the time. To successfully overcome this impentrable shield, men have to learn to have ?game,? or stand out in some way in order to catch the attention of these very few attractive women. Of course there will always be some men that can overcome all the handicaps and date many attractive women, but not everyone can be a Michael Jordan or Brad Pitt.

One of Happier Abroad?s fan mails really differentiated this difference between America vs overseas. This gentlemen?s statement went as follows:



?When you say a girl in America is hot, what you really mean is she is not fat. When you say a girl is hot in much of the world, she needs much more than just not being fat given that most of the population of woman are thin to begin with?



Compare this to the typical response from men when they go abroad:?


?Once my plane landed in Santa Cruz, like so many men who travel to South America, I was completely blown away by the sheer number of attractive

?women I saw on the streets?.




Foreign woman ALWAYS make an effort to look and dress their best when out in public. The dress style of European and Russian women is much more stylish, attractive, classy, and feminine than in America, where women dress much more plainly in comparison (since after all, even average plain women in the US have their pick of the bunch, thus they have no need to look top-notch).  Foreign women are much better at maximizing their appearance with clothes/cosmetics and unlike American women, they love wearing skirts and high heels, which are much more attractive to men.  As with the weight difference, this is so apparent everywhere you go in these regions that even the biggest idiot in the world couldn?t help but notice it.  In fact, I and other Americans I?ve met would say that in Russia (and often times in Latin America and Asia too), about 80 percent of girls are considered ?hot? by American standards, while in the USA, that proportion is, well, much lower so that any decent looking girl there is treated like a goddess and put on a pedestal.  What is considered ?hot? by American standards is average in Russia.  If you don?t believe it, come spend time in the crowded cities of Moscow and St. Petersburg, and you?ll see exactly what we mean.

?Why do these girls get so dressed up for the airport?? That?s what the two American girls behind me were saying about the Latin women who were also waiting on the check in line for our flight to miami. There was a stark difference between the two. The American girls looked like they just hopped out of bed. They both had baggy sweats and baggy sweaters on. Their hair was a mess and they honestly couldn?t care less. It was a 6:40 am flight and I can understand that maybe they didn?t bother because the flight was so early, but from their attitude I wouldn?t be surprised if they would show up like that for a 4:00 PM flight. Even though it was an early flight, the Latin women on the line found the time to ?dress up?. An ?Americanized? Latin girl may step out in public in her sweats and baggy shirt, with her hair all over the place, but a real Latin woman wouldn?t dream of leaving her house if she doesn?t fix helself up a bit. It?s part of the Latin culture. In Latin America there is much more competition among females. American women ?slack off? because they ca afford to. But foreign women never let their guard down in this aspect. These foreign women would look gorgeous if they made no effort at all. But they dress up even when they go to the dry cleaners ? in body hugging T-shirts, low-slung jeans, short skirts and strappy heels. Having a less-than-perfect figure doesn?t stop a Latina. She simply knows what to do.?



CNN Article

Look presentable always - Madame Chic wouldn't even go to the corner store to get a baguette without applying lipstick and tying a scarf around her neck, Scott recalled. Looking presentable was a way of honoring the people she came in contact with everyday. "This isn't to be confused with being high maintenance," Scott said."She wouldn't spend an hour in the bathroom flat-ironing her hair and applying meticulous makeup. She had a very quick (routine): 'Le no makeup look' and a very easy hairstyle to follow. Her 10-item wardrobe allowed her to pick something really easily. She wouldn't agonize over what clothes to wear every day like so many of us do."Scott also noticed the family would routinely wear their best clothes for everyday occasions, a lesson she took to heart.

 Per Dr Laura Shlessinger on this topic:


?Shahina, a listener, wrote about her sad story of divorce after ten years of marriage. Her husband left her, complaining that they had so little time together (because she was over involved with her mommy and daddy) and he no longer found her attractive. It seems she had gained a tremendous amount of weight by eating too much and exercising too little. I can bet that the reaction of most woman upon reading that is to get their hackles up and proclaim her husband as shallow. Frankly, that hostile reaction itself demonstrates a shallow self centeredness. The impact on our bodies of natural aging, , illness, pregnancies, and so forth is a simple fact of life. The inability to accept these realities betrays immaturity or worse. At the same time, though, the unwillingness to accept responsibility for the upkeep of one's physical or emotional well-being should be met with consternation by a spouse because it is an assault on the marital covenant. And the disregard of the unique feelings and needs of one's spouse is a selfish insult. 


"I would try to tell him that I would go on a diet and exercise to lose weight and become more attractive. I thought I would do these things for him so that he would find me attractive. I knew deep down that I did not want to do those things because I wanted him to love me and accept me just the way I was."


This is not an unusual sentiment for me to hear from woman, who express hostility that their husbands would like them to clean up, dress up, and tone up. They act like their husbands are selfish, sex crazed, superficial, insensitive barbarians, which isn't the case. The "if they  loved me, they wouldn't make a fuss about such things" point of view is simply irresponsible and destructive. As I said in my chapter on communication, verbal exchange is but one means of communication. A lot is said by one spouse to another by the willingness to fulfill each other's needs. Men have the emotional need to see their wives as desiring them, and the way the wives take care of and present themselves expresses that love.? (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 123-126)

After marriage, and definitley after having children, too many wives contract the ?Frump syndrome,? the symptoms of which include wearing flanel pajamas an socks, or sweat-pants with oversized T ?shirts, to bed instead of some girly thing with lace;not shaving legs or grooming nails;not washing, styling, or even combing hair;taking off (instead of fresheningup) makeup from the day just before your husband comes home; usingthe toilet with him in the room; not making an attempt to smell sweet 9with a little prefume or body oil); and never putting on sexy outfits? in front of your husband. When woman call into my radio program to say that they are unhappy in their marriages, but nothing particularly is actually wrong, I ask themif they have contracted this ailment. Almost universally the answer is yes. When I suggest the obvious cure, I am confronted with some angry, annoyed, resentful, defensive woman! It?s worrisome when women embrace the notion that once they are married, they are entitled to be loved, adored, protected, gifted, romanced, obeyed, and provided for without any effort on their part to create the emotional and psychological environment that would more likely get them all those desires. Sam, a female listener wrote ?women expect to be wooed yet be allowed to l ook haggish and frumpy. It?s hard to romance a hag and come off as being sincere?. What attracts men to women is their femininity, and femininity isnt only about appearance, it?s also about behaviours. Looking womanly and behaving sweetly and flirtatiously are gifts to their husbands. This gift communicates that the husband is seen as a man, not just a fix-it guy, the bread-winner, or the sperm donor. (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 120-121)



Mark Davis of European Dream Connections


?They continually work on their looks. They dress well and tend to stay fit. This is especially true for both men and women in Asia and Eastern Europe. They may only have a few outfits, but they will always look the best they can.?


?The advantage you will have with International Dating is that nearly all of your prospective dates would be 8?s to 10?s by American beauty standards.?



Common Complaints that American men are expressing about many American woman


Theres a big difference between telling someone they can be "better" and telling them they?re substandard. the later tends to be the most common approach of post modern feminist societies, the former is the approach the rest of the world uses.


I love the way Mark Davis of European connections expalins it. In the excerpt below from his E book, he describes how he addresses a common question he would get from the Russian ladies.??


?WHAT?S THE STORY? YOU COULDN?T FIND A GIRL IN AMERICA??? - ?I was asked by the girls on several of my dates, so I decided to make a science of how to answer it ? and have some fun with it.?That?s a great question,? I would say. ?You have probably seen a lot of American movies, so you know that there are many beautiful American women. But I don?t enjoy dating them anymore. They tell me things like, ?I make good money at my job and drive a nice car. What are you going to do for me?? I am not looking for a relationship where I have to prove anything. I just want to be a good man who loves a good woman. I only want the best and I heard that the greatest women in the world were here; so I came to find out for myself.?


Another thing I have observed is that foreign women treat men better than American women. Simply put, foreign woman are far more NURTURING. One small example is the fact that many foreign women love to cook for their man. While some American woman do this, truth be told, they are few and far between. On the other hand, most Foreign women Ive seen can cook and they don?t see these types of acts as burdens or slave like behaviours . On the contrary, they see these types of acts as privileges that brings them joy. They feel it solidifies their roles within the relationship and family as a nurturing caregiver.




Studies show that Woman in America now score equal to men on masculinity tests


NOTE- This does not make these woman bad per se, or less of a woman. Im simply pointing out the fact that generally speaking, woman in America have lost touch with their soft feminine side. Some men are fine with that and if so, that is fine. But many other men prefer more feminine relationship and marriage partners.

Fact is, ?most American men have never traveled abroad so they have no sense of just how much of a difference there really is.


See our research section where Jean Twenge states ?by the early 1990's men and women's scores on the scale of so called masculine traits were indistinguishable. The generational change in masculinity had turned the very definition of the scale on its head: clearly these traits were no longer masculine, but simply human" (Generation Me, pg 12)

?The modern feminist movement that has developed in the wealthy western nations robs women of their true feminine qualities by pushing women to become more like men. These modern feminist women dress like men, walk like men, and are pushed to loose their feminine qualities in exchange for more masculine qualities. Many American woman have lost touch with their instinctual, feminine sides, and are losing the feminine qualities men instinctively seek.? (



The Pick up Artist movement in America


Much of my opinion about this subject matches Winston?s opinion piece on the subject matter at


? The existence of the pick up artist industry in America really proves our point about America being one of the worst dating environments for men in the entire world. How does it prove our point you may ask? Well, think about this. While the pick up artist industry may be thriving in the US, it?s simply unheard of in other countries. I challenge you to find another country where men pay seduction or pick up artist gurus to teach them how to meet women. You can't, cause in doesn?t exist outside the US. They?re not needed because in other countries the process of interacting with and meeting woman flows more naturally. It?s not F ed up like in the US. The "chumps" who pay for these services never never stop to ask the obvious question: "Why doesn't this industry exist in other countries too?" ?Think about it, why would such a natural thing like male/female courtship need to be reduced to a "technique" or "science" as though it were a difficult subject that needed to be "mastered"?? The obvious answer is that there are numerous reasons for this which I discuss in other parts of this article and in our research section. Its because of the unique characteristics of the average American woman (mainly the infection of feminism) combined with the severe gender imbalances in America that gives woman in the US the upper hand. The US dating scene is simply a very hostile environment for the average single male. To ad insult to injury, most guys don?t even realize it because they?ve never known any better. They?ve never travelled and dated abroad to see how much easier woman are to meet and to see how much easier the whole dating process flows. In other countries, it's just like you see in the movies - boy meets girl, they flirt, hold hands, say "I like you" to each other, then kiss and so forth. It's completely natural and effortless.


The main problem of the PUA thing is that they tell you there is a cookie cutter formula (Mystery's Model) and that if you master it, you will be a master of picking up chicks. They fail to recognize that the problem lies with the dating environment.


One thing about the whole pick up artist industry that I despise most is that they teach you how to? NOT BE YOURSELF! The presumption is that you are defective, and not deserving of a woman as you are. What a bunch of crap! Trying to be something that you're not all day eventually leads to psychological imbalance and mental dysfunction. Not a good thing. Any man who has dated overseas will tell you what we are telling you. The problem is not you, it?s your dating environment (aka :America). Its all about LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION!


Random Internet posts on this PUA subject


I would like to ask guys who think "PUA" is the greatest thing since sliced bread, how come in eastern Europe, Russia, Philippines, Thailand, South America or Mexico you don't need to use PUA techniques? You only need to use PUA in anlgo countries like the UK, US, Canada, Australia and New Zealand.




Imagine trying to explain to Thai or Russian men what Pick up artist is about, LOL. The product only sells in America bc there is problem for men in the first place




I was in the philippines for a couple of months and majority of the women there aren't stuck up/bitchy/ or paranoid. Most are friendly and social. Claiming that it's "LACK OF GAME" is self deprecating, not self empowering





The most important thing in this life is to be yourself! Emulating some popular archetype is the quickest way to destroy your soul. We're not interested in sacrificing our masculinity, our dignity, and becoming soulless zombies in a desperate attempt to gain the acceptance of some toxic American woman





Who is really after your money?



Now, on a different subject matter, I find it amazingly ironic to hear some people say, ?Be careful, these foreign women are only after you for your money. They don't really love you?. My, my, how we Americans are so quick to judge.  Americans who give this warning fail to comprehend that it's the average American woman who I fear most in this regard and whom I should be worrying about. Does that sound outlandish? Well, if so, then see expert quotes below for proof of this. Lets see what the experts have to say about who is more driven by money and materialism - American woman vs foreign woman.??

For example, Social Psychologist Jean Twenge says some pretty damming quotes that clearly indicate she is saying Americans (hence American woman) are the ones who are driven and overly focused on material wealth and money, not foreigners. Jean twenge states that one of the key components of narcissism in America today is ?materialism?. Keep this fact in mind when considering the expert quotes below.??

In one dataset, Americans scored in the top 10-20% of nations on narcissism. In another study, Americans obtained higher narcissism scores than people from any other country. Our students might not be the brightest, or our poverty level the lowest, but Americans do just fine on narcissism tests!? (Generation Me, pg 37)??????

?It is interesting to note, Asians as a group still score relatively low on measures of narcissism. Within the United States, Asian Americans score lower on narcissism than any other ethnic group. (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 262)?

In 1976, 16% of American high school seniors said that ?having a lot of money? was ?extremely important.? This ballooned to 26% in 2006. High school students name ?getting a good paying job? as more important than being ?ethical and honorable?. (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 162-163)

In 1967, 45% of college freshman said that ?becoming well off financially? was important; by 2006, that number increased to 75% . The Pew Research Center asked young people, what are your generation's most important goals? Eight in Ten said getting rich, while only 4% said becoming more spiritual. (Generation Me, pg 131)?

A 2006 poll asked children in Britain to name ?the very best thing in the world? The most popular answer was ?being a celebrity?. ?Good looks? and ?being rich? rounded out the top three, making for a perfectly narcissistic triumvirate. ?God? came in last. (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 93)

Economist Thomas Naylor taught corporate strategy courses at Duke University in the 1990?s. He commented on how he could sense an intense rise in materialism during this time. He asked each of his students to write a personal strategic plan. With few exceptions, what they wanted fell into three categories: money, power, and things - very big things, including vacation homes, expensive foreign automobiles, yachts and even airplanes? Their request to faculty was: Teach me how to be a ?money making machine?. Little else mattered, reported Naylor, including concerns for one?s family, spirituality, employees, or ethics and social responsibility. (The American Paradox, pg 127)

The upswing in narcissism appears to be accelerating: the increase between 2000 and 2006 was especially steep. The changes were especially large for women (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 31)?????? ?

?According to the American research, there has been a 67 per cent increase in it over the past two decades, mainly among women?.?

So, let me ask again, who cares more about whether you have money? Yet it is so funny to hear people warn how foreign woman are only after your money when in light of the expert quotes above, it seems to be the American women are going to care more about money.

Monetary issues seldom come up with women from other countries. Securing a particular lifestyle, usually an improvement over what their parents enjoyed is #1 on 90% of Anglo Women's minds. Lets be honest, the society of the United States is at fault for the money hungry women that it produces. This country is too focused on wealth, 401Ks, "marry a doctor" "marry a Lawyer" "what kind of work do you do ? Like that some how will make their lives better. I?ve never been inquisitioned by a foreign woman about what I do, nor have I experienced a foreign woman hit me up with indirect probing questions about my net worth, debts, or assets. Men will find that foreign women will not make you feel like you're being "measured" or interviewed by a nasty bank manager, as is often the case when dating in America. Yet it?s so ironic how Americans will revert to American cultural stereotypes regarding foreign woman and jump to the automatic conclusion that foreign woman are only after you for money when in reality, more often than not, its the American woman you should worry about in this regard! I mean, wow, talk about calling the kettle black! With many woman herein America, generally speaking, I get the impression that no matter how good your morals and character, or how well you treat others, or whether you would be a good father or husband, none of it matters if you don?t have the $50K + income or the right type of job or career status to go with it. For many specific examples and PROOF of this, see my Dating Profiles Comparison. Foreign women are simply FAR less materialistic. Foreign women who have grown up in less developed countries do not fall prey to the consumer-driven mindset that many American women have been indoctrinated into. They?ve learned to get by on much less. They?ve learned the value of a dollar. They?ve probably sacrificed material things throughout their life, and they?ve learned to cherish and care for the things that really matter. In this way, foreign women are much easier to please when it comes to material wealth. On the other hand, many men find it hard to please American women who have become accustomed to a certain level of material wealth. Long gone are the days when a women falls for a guy because he is cute, funny and treats her well. Material things have leap frogged everything else on the list. So unless you make 75k+, own a 2400 square foot home and drive a brand new SUV, your chances of finding an American women are slim. Another thing, A foreign women will move with the clothes on her back, $100, and a plane ticket in her pocket to be with a guy she loves. I cant imagine most American woman doing the same thing.

On a personal note, Ive given this subject much thought. Ive concluded that if I am to work my butt off to support the woman I love, I would MUCH rather? do so for women who would naturally appreciate it and at least feel grattitude and gratefulness about it. Foreign woman do exactly that! As Dr Laura Schlessinger states, and as Jean Twenge?s research supports, (see our research section) too many American woman have become spoiled and entitled and expect their men to deliver the world on a silver platter. They don?t appreciate whatever their men do for them but just expect their men to do those things for them as a matter of their being entitled to it.

It bears repeating that not ALL American women are this way, but generally most are to one degree or another whereas by far and large, most foreign ladies are not this way.


Below is a online news article quoting a British man who stated the following about his experiences with dating American women (My friends and I have also experienced what he is talking about):

One of the first questions is always: "What car do I drive?" Martin says. "If I have the latest BMW or drive a Chevy, does it make a difference? And they want to know what apartment do you live in? Do you live in Bellevue, because if you tell them you live in Everett, they don't want to know you."


Here is a final comment in the Daily Mail from Oliver Bennett, 43, remembering a dinner-date with an American woman: "It was like being with a nasty bank manager, rather than someone with whom you hope to sleep??


I also came across this online post which I have found to be an accurate description about most foreign women (which is why it totally boggles my mind when Americans try to warn me about foreign women chasing after me for money or a green card):


?They say foreign women are gold diggers, after you for the money. I have dated 2 foreign women, one for 3 years and my current fianc? for 6 years. Each one of them refused expensive gifts, my fiance made me return her first engagement ring when she found out how much it cost and had me purchase a much smaller diamond. They don't like to eat at expensive restaurants preferring to cook and they clean and help me in my business doing the hardest work to help me succeed. American women on the other hand want to compete with their girlfriends in the size of their diamonds, the type of car and the size of the house, they don't cook and want to spend your money all day long and still bitch about it.?



This post makes a excellent point


American women claim that foreigners just want to "break out of their third-world countries," but how many American women choose men solely as a way to increase their standard of living too? 99% of the time, one of the FIRST questions an American woman asks me is "What do you do for a living?" If I said I were a doctor, she'd talk to me more. If I said I were a data entry clerk, she'd disappear faster than a cockroach in daylight. If I don't have a nice house, a nice car and a nice wardrobe, I'm not going to get her phone number. Meanwhile, most foreign women ask me about WHO I AM, rather than WHAT I HAVE.



And this post I found makes a good point also


US culture indoctrinates men that if they just get this degree, buy this house, get this promotion then they'll find a girl. It takes 20 years to get all this stuff, then the girl just wants a better house, a better job, etc, so its just a viscious circle for men. It impossible to please US women.




Lou Dobbs report - Women are realizing feminism has failed them


In this video - new study by the wharton school at the University of pennsylvania that shows that woman are less happier than men despite all the progress that woman have made since the birth of feminism. The study shows that the drop in happiness started in the early 70?s, right after the birth of feminism!?


The Lou dobbs video report




Experts now claim that Feminism is one of the primary causes of marriage and family breakdown in America



As our research section proves, leading experts seem to be pointing to feminism and the upswing of narcissism among American woman as the primary cause of our national divorce epidemic and family breakdown over the past 40 years.



Dr. Laura Schlessinger even goes so far as to say that:


??feminism is not only responsible for the deterioration of the family, but also for the disintegration of intimacy between men and women.?


Dr David G Myers says:


?There is evidence that women with traditional sex role attitudes are indeed less likely to divorce than those with feminists attitudes (The American Paradox,???

?? pg 45-46)


I believe Dr Laura is correct when she states that feminism is at the root of the divorce epidemic and family breakdown in America. I also believe the primary benchmark of feminism is the aggregate divorce rate. A review of the facts will show the top 5 nations are the US, UK, NZ, and AUS. .


Note that the rise in the divorce rate coincided with the birth of and continued rise of feminism. Also note that the countries that rank the highest in divorce rates around the world are also countries that rank the highest in feminism. Just another simple haphazard coincidence? What would be the odds of that kind of timing? Before blowing off these facts as merely unrelated coincidences, let me leave you with some quotes directly from the American experts that I think pretty much makes it undeniable that through the double whammy of feminism and narcissism, the changes weve witnessed with American woman (as as documented by these experts - see our research section) have been the root cause of marriage and family breakdown in America over the past 40 years. This is not just an opinion. You may review these sample quotes below by leading American experts and decide for yourself what you think. Below is but a very small sampling of the documentation we provide in our main research section of this site supporting these notions. I want to emphasize that the experts we use to prove our points are not some unknown cherry picked professionals without a track record. Our research section fully documents the credentials of our experts and clearly they are considered among the top experts in the Inited States today. Most are New York times best selling authors.??





?feminism is not only responsible for the deterioration of the family, but also for the disintegration of intimacy between men and women.? (Dr Laura Schlessinger ?Proper care and feeding of husbands)


?The result is that women get married thinking largely about what their marriage and their man can do for them. And when there is so little emphasis on giving, the nitpicking and pettiness chews up and spits out what could have been a good marriage. (The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 2-3)


?Pop psyche and woman?s magazines generally recommend that when a woman is ?fed up? with her life, it?s time for spas, solo vacations, more girlfriend time, plastic surgery, affairs, or divorce. This is all in the search for ?getting one?s own needs met? (The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 162)


 "Most of the woman we interviewed insisted they were not looking for a prince charming -then, without missing a beat, they described an equally unattainable ideal". It?s ironic that we?ve developed such lofty expectations of our potential husbands at a time when nearly 50% of marriages still end in divorce. (Dr Jean Twenge -Gen me pg 133)


Woman have become selfish and have a sense of entitlement that is out of proportion.(Dr Laura Schlessinger ?Proper care and feeding of husbands)



This grandiose self-centeredness about the value of women, paired with a virtual disdain for men, leads woman to treat men badly. Too many woman look at men with a sense of entitlement versus an opportunity for selflessness. (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 54)


Unfortunately, (in America), love is usually looked at as a feeling that comes over you and makes you happy; and of course, if you?re happy, then you behave nicely. Somehow, the notion is out there that you?re entitled to behave badly if you don?t feel that lovin feeling. More than that, if you don?t get that lovin feeling, you?re entitled to get it somehow, somewhere, with someone else who?s available.? This sense of entitlement comes from a culture that has elevated feelings over obligation, responsibility, and commitment. ?I have a right to be happy, don?t I? is not an infrequent comment from callers frustrated that their marriages haven?t put them in a perpetual valium ?drip state. And this focus on happiness helps them to rationalize their virtual abandonment of marriage and family, replacing it with hobbies, drugs and alcohol, work, affairs, whining in therapy or with friends and family, or hostility directed at those who love them.? This is not a minor issue. This is the point I bring to the attention of many woman callers who, with unrealistic demands and outrageously negative behaviors, determine that the solution to the problems in their home is divorce. They are wrong if they think a new pair of pants will change their lives ? because the same skirt wills still be in the room! (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 4-5)

Feminists are women who are angry, starting with fairness and employment. Every human being should have that, but the movement was co-opted by women who didn't love either men or femininity. They rant about all this patriarchal nonsense. Women don't realize how angry they are.(Dr Laura Schlessinger ?Proper care and feeding of husbands)


How is it that so many woman are angry with men in general yet expect to have a happy life married to one of them? (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 53)

?young women have been raised in a culture that is hostile to men.Feminism isn?t all about hating men, its largely about disdaining and dimissing them.? Women don't realize how angry they are?. And The feminist double whammy of the elevation of woman without men and (and children without fathers and the dismissal of men as unnecssary or even dangerous has certainly not contributed to the kind of disposition that woman need in order to function well within a monogamous heterosexual committed relationship.? (Dr Laura ?proper care and feeding of husbands pg 54)?

My experiences in private practice (as a marriage and family Therapist), on air, and with the emails, faxes, and letters I?ve gotten from my listeners draw an alarmingly clear picture of, in my opinion, gender abuse. That abuse consists of an amazingly crass disdain of wives for husbands? feelings. And it causes husbands deep pain.? (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 66)


Male sexuality is another subject that seems to elicit hostility in many woman. A lot is said by one spouse to another by the willingness to fulfill each other?s needs. Yet wives expect husbands to ignore their own neglected needs and hurt feelings and do for them whatever they want?..or else!

I can remember one female caller in particular who complained that her husband wasn?t understanding about how tired, burdened, and overwhelmed she was. He still wanted sex. I asked her what was wrong with that since most people expect monogamy in marriages not celibacy. That seemed to startle her, but only for a moment. She hit back with the challenge, ?should I be expected to have sex when I don?t want to just because he wants to?? I took a deep breath and answered , ?most of the time, yes.? She was horrified and likened my response to a call for some form of slavery. I reminded her that she expected him to go to work and earn money to support the family even on days he didn?t feel like it. I reminded her it?s called ?loving obligation.?? (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 126-134)


The denigration of male sexual needs (They are just animals) and the use of sex to punish or control (You didn't do what I wanted) and inappropriate prioritizing (My work and children take all my energy) are self-centered and self-defeating. (Dr Laura Schlessinger ?Proper care and feeding of husbands)


The destructive anti-male subtext of the modern feminist agenda argues that catering to or deferring to a husband is a slave like submission to the male. (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 149)


Gloria Steinem wrote that ?woman need men like fish need bicycles,? more than a generation of woman have foolishly bought that destructive nonsense and have denigrated men, marriage, familial obligation, and motherhood ?all to their own detriment. (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg xxii)?


The feminist double whammy of the elevation of woman without men (and children without fathers) and the dismissal of men as unnecessary or even dangerous has certainly not contributed to the kind of positive disposition that woman need in order to function well within a monogamous, heterosexual committed relationship. (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 54)

Try visiting various female oriented internet chat rooms, and you?ll find cheering sections rallying behind woman who trash their men, determined to leave them for trivial reasons. (i.e. He?s not talkative enough, I just don?t feel complete, I?m bored, or He doesn?t want me talking to my mother every day) And while we?re talking about double standards, let?s not forget what happens in the bedroom. Woman expect their men to ?understand? when they?re not interested in sex, but when the men don?t or can?t perform ? watch out!? What causes this double-standard mentality? In one big,? hyphenated word: Self-Centeredness. And what is the source of this self-centeredness? I believe it?s a result of the woman?s movement, with its condemnation of just about everything male as evil, stupid, and oppressive, and the denigration of female and male roles in families. The result is woman get married thinking largely about what their marriage and their man can do for them. And when there is so little emphasis on the giving, the nitpicking and pettiness chews up and spits out what could have been a good marriage. (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 2-3)


These calls are not aberrant. They reflect typical attitudes of a preponderance of woman in today?s America. (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg xxi)? *This statement is the kicker! She is saying that all of these troublesome attributes that she discusses in her books describe the PREPONDERANCE of American woman!! Not just a few of them, or just some of them, or just those who are calling in to her radio program!?


The ugly part about the feminist movement is that it supports personal success, acquisition, accomplishment, power, and the feminist political agenda over love, marriage, and family.? Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 10) Anti family ?no wonder why the divorce rate is 50-60% in America and other feministic nations compared to 20% when American men marry foreign ladies from cultures that don?t ascribe to this feminism.


If there is one basic assumption I believe that most married woman make, it is that their husbands are to serve them, and that any demands husbands make are insensitive and selfish. When I tell woman callers that they are obligated to their husbands for such-and-such, I generally get two reactions: The first is surprise, the second is anger over perceived oppression. Think about it for even one minute: How many woman?s mags talk about woman?s obligations to their men and children? Not many. The typical article is about deserving freedom. These days, so many young woman are products of divorces or never created homes, were neglected by career mothers, were indoctrinated by the anti-family feminists throughout their schooling, and are surrounded by a culture that glorifies selfish gratification over sacrifice. (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 32)


The Universal complaint of men who emailed my web site with their opinions about ?The proper care and feeding of husbands?? was that their wives criticize, complain, nag, rarely compliment or express appreciation, are difficult to satisfy, and basically are not as nice to them as they?d be to a stranger ringing their doorbell at 3AM! These are not men who hate their wives or who were divorced; on the contrary, they are guys who love their wives and are trying to do whatever they can to please them. However they are miserable and lonely. I?m convinced that too many wives don?t know what to do or how to communicate if they?re not complaining, nagging, or criticizing. (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 38 & 41)


One gentlemen?s post on a internet chat board describes what Dr Laura us talking about above when he said? ?They complain too much. I don't mean about the relationship or men - I mean, in general, every conversation is a complaint about something : work, food, family, the news, politics. There is a perverse focus on the negative, which I believe comes from their sense of entitlement. In comparison to most foreign women, in this aspect, American women seem like spoiled children. It's tiring?.


It was clear to me that we?re turning a generation of kids who don?t know how to have a relationship (Dr Jean Twenge - The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 225)

Far from being oppressed in marriages, most wives are the oppressors. (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 75) WOW! This is a world renowned relationship therapist saying this! And she even uses the word MOST instead of the word some! This is what I mean about foreign woman being a better option. The much lower divorce rate of 20% with foreign woman seems to support this notion.????


The stereotype of a woman insensitive to a man?s feelings is, unfortunately, well ?earned. This problem for men is one of a severe magnitude. Many woman treat their men?s feelings with disrespect and disregard. Woman seem to imagine that that their husbands can, will, and ought to take a lot of abuse and keep on ticking (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 79 & 81)


The notion of ?fixed roles? is inflammatory and controversial. It shouldn?t be so. I?ve said it many times on my program that woman have become denigrated by that part of the feminist movement that dismisses marriage, child rearing, and home-making as insignificant and insulting to woman. As long as woman disrespect what they have to offer as wives and mothers, they will continue to disrespect their men who serve as husbands and fathers. No one benefits. No one is happy

(Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 169-170)


Many woman (if not most) of today not only want to compete with men, in fact, they want to be like men. If you doubt this statement, see my research section that details the research reports on the masculinization of American woman. Dr Jean Twenge says ?by the early 1990?s, men and woman?s scores on the scale of masculine traits were indistiguishable. (Generation Me, pg 12)? American woman now score EQUALLY to the men on masculinity tests!! I don?t think this is what mother nature had in store for mankind and I believe this has been a significant contributor to the rise in divorce in this country.?



Many people in the United States today are simply oblivious to others? needs, or worse, think that others? needs are just not as important as their own needs. This state of mind is called entitlement, the pervasive belief that one deserves special treatment, success, and more material things. Entitlement is one of the key components of narcissism, and one of the most damaging to others. When narcissists feel entitled to special treatment, someone else invariably gets the shaft.? (Dr Jean Twenge - The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 230) Although it was Dr Jean Twenge who was just quoted above, it is interesting to note how Dr Laura Schlessinger points out numerous times in her work that American woman tend to be self centered in relationships and have a out of proportion sense of entitlement. Any man who dates overseas quickly learns just how true this is once he finally get the opportunity to have something relative to compare it to. They are amazed at how humble and appreciative foreign woman are.?


Materialism is the most obvious outcome of a straight forward, practical focus on the self: you want more things for yourself. You feel entitled to get the best in life; the best clothes, the best house, the best car. You're special, you deserve special things" (Dr Jean Twenge -Generation Me, pg 100) This does seem to be a tendency with the attitudes of many American woman today. Based on my own experiences and conversations with other American men, this is by far, hands down, the most common complaint I hear from men.???

There is evidence that woman with traditional sex role attitudes are indeed less likely to divorce than those with feminists attitudes (The American Paradox, pg 45-46)

Folks, this is so critical to grasp! Re read this sentence directly above in purple again!? Science has now proven that divorce is higher with woman who have been brought up in a culture that ingrains feministic values!! Given that the females in American are taught feministic values, (no social psychologist would argue with this fact) your odds of divorce are far higher when marrying an American woman. As many experts such as Dr Laura state, the feminist attitude is anti male .But this anti male attitude exists at a subconscious cultural level. Its not that woman consciously think such things in their minds. That is why when many people read this statement, they play it down or react in disbelief. Ya see, its not something you see on the surface. At a conscious level, they simply can?t comprehend or relate to it. As Dr Jean Twenge says about this lack of awareness by most Americans, ?A fish doesn?t know its in water?. American woman and men have lived in this culture of feminism all their lives so most barely have an idea that it exists. Men often don?t realize it either as they have known nothing else all their lives but American culture and American woman. Men usually become aware of this difference when they escape the US matrix. (This is akin to taking that purple pill like in the movie ?the matrix? and seeing what the reality is) But of course, the experts don?t need to take a purple pill because they know it exists because they are the experts. The experts (i.e. social psychologists) can step back from the mainstream view of society and see that particular society from a neutral unbias point of view. But when you go abroad and spend time actually living in a non western culture, you start to clearly recognize these differences. You certainly recognize the materialism and narcissism of American culture and the significant differences with the woman and the dating environment. The one overiding theme that stands out the most when going abroad is that woman really do NEED men.???


?Generation Me? women spend less time on house work than our mothers did; we expect to split things 50/50 with our male partners, and when this doesn?t happen we often explode.? (Dr Jean Twenge - Generation Me, pg 196)


?In data from 37,000 college students, narcissistic personality traits rose just as fast as obesity from the 1980?s to the present, with the shift especially pronounced for woman.? ?(The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 1-4)?


The upswing in narcissism appears to be accelerating: the increase between 2000 and 2006 was especially steep. The changes were especially large for women (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 31) ??This shows that the rise in narcissism was mainly among the woman.


One pattern of relationship behaviors is the ?fear of settling? or ?fear of missing out on the magic.? In the old days this would have been considered simple immaturity. You would have been told to ?take the good with the bad? or relationships are not all about you.? Today there is a different cultural message. Our individualistic culture narcissistically teaches people not to compromise (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 221) Successful marriages and relationships require compromise in order to be successful and survive. We all know that is a important element in successful happy marriages. Maybe this is why International marriages have such a low divorce rate compared to American marriages. Foreign woman have not been inoctrinated into our entitlment focused narcissistic culture and hence foreign woman are easier to get along with, more accommodating, and most willing to compromise on things in relationships.?


Narcissism has corroded interpersonal relationships. There has been a switch from deep to shallow relationships, a destruction of social trust, and an increase in entitlement and selfishness. (Dr Jean Twenge - The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 276) Entitlement and selfishness. Again, Ill make it clear that I?m not advocating that ALL woman in the US are this way. Myself and the experts are only talking in generalities only, as in most having these tendencies to one degree or another. Dr Laura used the word ?preponderance?, meaning MOST.


There is a ?what have you done for me lately?? attitude in relationships. And if the answer is ?not enough?, then it?s on to the next partner ?after all, goes our narcissistic culture patter, ?you deserve better!? It?s difficult to focus on someone else when you?ve been taught your whole life to focus on yourself. (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 221)


So if American woman were responsible for most of the measured increase in narcissism in America as Dr Jean Twenge states, how likely is it that a man will end up having a healthy, satisfying, and successful relationship if he marries the average American woman? Well, as the studies show, they don?t, ?America has a 50-60% divorce rate compared to only a 20% divorce rate when an American man marries a foreign girl. Interesting how drastic the difference in divorce rates become by simply changing the country of origin of the wife.


Americans are being persuaded that becoming more vain, materialistic, and self-centered is actually a good thing. (The Narcissism Epidemic pg 38) Since she is referring to both men and woman (as men have not completely escaped the narcissism), you can logically argue that both men and woman might be better served by getting a foreign spouse, We can be fair minded in that regard. But to be honest, foreign men have a huge pool of thin sexy humble woman to choose from. I can pretty much predict that most foreign men will not mix well with Western woman due to the following characteristic traits that are unique to only Western woman.? 1)masculine tendencies (tests show woman now score equal to men in masculinity tests) 2) entitlement attitudes 3) obesity. (According to the US disease and control center, 75% of Americans are overweight or obese). Unfortunately, I don?t think foreign men in general would be a good match for Western woman.?????



In fact, narcissism causes almost all of the things that Americans hoped high self-esteem would prevent, including aggression, materialism, lack of caring for others, and shallow values. (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 9)??????


Asian cultures are more collective and discourage individualism and narcissism. Overall, more traditional cultures - those that value family, duty, and obligation ? are less narcissistic than more modern cultures like that of the US. In one dataset, Americans scored in the top 10-20% of nations on narcissism. In another study, Americans obtained higher narcissism scores than people from any other country. Our students might not be the brightest, or our poverty level the lowest, but Americans do just fine on narcissism tests! (Generation Me, pg 37)?? The point with this quote is that foreign woman are not narcissistic hence you will have a far more likely to have a better marriage partner and a happier more successful marriage. The stats bare this out.?


It is interesting to note, Asians as a group still score relatively low on measures of narcissism. Within the United States, Asian Americans score lower on narcissism than any other ethnic group. (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 262) ???


Economist Thomas Naylor taught corporate strategy courses at Duke University in the 1990?s. He commented on how he could sense an intense rise in materialism during this time. He asked each of his students to write a personal strategic plan. With few exceptions, what they wanted fell into three categories: money, power, and things - very big things, including vacation homes, expensive foreign automobiles, yachts and even airplanes? Their request to faculty was: Teach me how to be a ?money making machine?. Little else mattered, reported Naylor, including concerns for one?s family, spirituality, employees, or ethics and social responsibility. (The American Paradox, pg 127) This seems to exactly describe the expectations and priorities of most Americans, and especially the expectations of American woman in the dating scene. But not foreign woman. See the sample dating profiles section where we show that American womans? dating profiles have an extreme perverse focus on money and material lifestyle, especially observing how they list high minimum income requirements. (The studies show that people who focus on money and material attainment in life are far more depressed and unhappy than those who don?t.) Then look at the Foreign lady profiles where you find no mention or hint about money or a man?s career. Their profiles instead focus on finding a loving husband, family, and spiritualness,? (i.e. ?god bless? and ?god willing? are all common phrases on foreign ladies profiles and emails). And interestingly enough, depression and mental illness is almost non existent in the countries that these ladies come from. One can argue that its at least partly because foreign woman don?t focus on money and material things like Americans do. The difference in American and foreign ladies dating profiles is like night and day. One is demanding and money hungry while the other is humble and appreciative and spiritual, focusing on husband, family, and god.????


Entitlement causes real problems in relationships and leads to conflicts. Being accommodating leads to much less conflict in relationships. (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 233) ?Bingo! Asian and Latin woman are especially accommodating, but many Americans confuse this with the negative connotation of submission. There is a difference.



The problem with entitlement in relationships is this kind of mentality: ?You?re special, how dare anyone not show you respect?? Your spouse?s nasty comments or behavior are seen as fundamental challenges to your special stature in life, and thus you can?t just let them slide. The result is spiraling relationship conflict. (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 233)? We all know which of the sexes we constantly hear this defensive attitude from, right??


Individualists also feel more frustration with their marriages: they criticize their partners more severely and express less marital happiness. (The American Paradox, pg 184) Again, this explains why it is riskier to marry someone from an individualistic culture such as America, and explains what contributes to our abysmal divorce rate which leads to broken families where more kids grow up in 1 parent households which leads to harmful consequences for these kids that lasts a lifetime. It also leads to harmful consequences for society too. (crime, juvenile delinquency, poorer academic performance etc)?? ?

Now, (in America), most people consider it completely acceptable to divorce if you are unhappy- (Generation Me, pg 25) Foreign woman don?t, and I?m sure that has a lot to do with the 20% divorce rate of American men and foreign woman vs 50-60% divorce rate in America

In America, marriage is no longer idealized as self-sacrificial love or as an enduring commitment. Adults, regardless of marital status, continuously measure their marriage against perceived alternatives. (The American Paradox, pg 183) Foreign woman hold to traditional values and still see marriage as a self-sacrificial enduring commitment.

If individualism corrodes family commitments, we should also expect to see greater individualism linked with weaker family bonds across cultures ? which we do. The United States is both the world?s most individualistic and most divorce prone nation. Britain is somewhat less individualistic, and it has barely half the divorce rate. Collectivists demand less romance and personal fulfillment in marriage, putting the relationship under less pressure. In one survey, ?keeping romance alive? was rated as important to a good marriage by 78% of American woman and 29% of Japanese woman. Individualists also select mates differently, asking, ?what does my heart say?? As it happens, what the heart says is a notoriously fragile foundation for long term marital success. The high of romance may be sustained for a few months, even a couple of years. But no high lasts forever. Those who marry for love report diminishing feelings of love if they had been married more than 5 years. By contrast, those in arranged marriages reported more love if they were not newlyweds.? (The American Paradox, pg 184) American woman are brought up to believe that they must be in love all the time. If American woman don?t find themselves in a perpetual valium drip-state, then they feel they are getting cheated out of their rightful soul mate experience and therefore its time for divorce. See Dr Laura?s description of this problem with American woman below in the very next quote.


Unfortunately, (in America), love is usually looked at as a feeling that comes over you and makes you happy; and of course, if you?re happy, then you behave nicely. Somehow, the notion is out there that you?re entitled to behave badly if you don?t feel that lovin feeling. More than that, if you don?t get that lovin feeling, you?re entitled to get it somehow, somewhere, with someone else who?s available. (Exactly. This contributes to America?s our world leading divorce rate!) This sense of entitlement comes from a culture that has elevated feelings over obligation, responsibility, and commitment. ?I have a right to be happy, don?t I? is not an infrequent comment from callers frustrated that their marriages haven?t put them in a perpetual valium ?drip state. And this focus on happiness helps them to rationalize their virtual abandonment of marriage and family, replacing it with hobbies, drugs and alcohol, work, affairs, whining in therapy or with friends and family, or hostility directed at those who love them.? This is not a minor issue. This is the point I bring to the attention of many woman callers who, with unrealistic demands and outrageously negative behaviors, determine that the solution to the problems in their home is divorce. They are wrong if they think a new pair of pants will change their lives ? because the same skirt will be in the room! (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 4-5)

Today?s more divorce-accepting attitudes contribute to the decline of marital satisfaction, The belief that an unrewarding marriage should be jettisoned may lead some people to invest less time in their marriages and make fewer attempts to resolve marital disagreements. Thus greater freedom to leave unsatisfying marriages may ironically increase the likelihood of marriages becoming unsatisfying. Divorce acceptance feeds marital unhappiness which feeds divorce. Americans are much less likely today than a generation ago to marry and live happily ever after. More often than not, sad to say, our initial euphoria mutates into a cold, loveless truce or worse. We should challenge radical individualism?s view that marriage is a disposable relationship. (The American Paradox, pg 45-46)

There is a way to change this truth with marriage in America. GO OVERSEAS and marry a foreign woman!! The stats show only a 20% divorce rate when American men marry a foreign woman. You can?t hide from the facts!



These same experts do not make any mention of American men as a group as posing similar problems in relationships


By the way, I think it?s important that I mention that these two American experts did not mention any examples of men as a ?group? as having their own problems causing serious issues in relationships and marriage. Im not implying that men are the blameless sex in America?s divorce epedemic, but my point is that I didn?t cherry pick these quotes and examples while purposely omitting similar quotes about men. There simply was no comments by these experts about men being the source of today?s divorce and relationship woes. The only similar statements about men were made by Jean Twenge when she occasionally gave a few examples of how the men did not completely escape the effects of narcissism (i.e. Over valueing material things and worshiping their 6 pack bodies). That?s about it. And that is interesting and quite revealing to say the least.?


When Dr Laura Schlessinger was asked why doesn?t she also write a book called ?the proper care and feeding of wives? or some such book that addresses dysfunctional relationship issues of men, her reply (shown below) was based on politically correctness. Of course she couldn?t make a statement that men are not generally at the root of relationship and marriage woes in America. Can you imagine women?s response to something like that! She would be hung for going that far and probably lose book sales too. So instead, she has to paint a politically correct and acceptable way so as to not offend the sensibilities of American women.


Dr Laura states:?


"Men are simple creatures who come from a woman, are nurtured and brought up by a woman, and yearn for the continued love, admiration, and approval from a woman." Women have great power and influence over men, and wives in particular have tremendous power over their husbands. How they use this power essentially controls the relationship, because women are the masters of most relationships and marriages.

The bottom line is obvious. She simply doesn?t believe men are at the root cause of the marriage and family breakdown in America. In her books she clearly states that feminism has destroyed the family unit and what was once a harmonious relationship between men and woman.



Foreign woman don?t pass judgement? about? your living situation


What Im about to point out here will likely be seen as very taboo by both American men and woman. But we need to put aside our Western cultural upbringing and let the science do the talking before we so blindly criticize and scowl at the idea of adult children living at home.


An adult living at home is completely immaterial to foreign woman because that is actually the norm and very typical in most non western countries. Such a thing is only stygmatized in the West. Let me repeat that,?only in the West is such a thing considered a negative thing. But as you read my research section you will see that this cultural ?stand alone? individualistic independent attitude is what gets us Americans into so much trouble ? mental health wise .


Western culture claims that living at home into adult hood is a ?loser? thing. Yet who are we (as Americans) to make such a claim when we have such a abysmal mental health track record?? We have the highest mental Illness (depression and anxiety)? in the entire world!! And guess what? Lonliness is identified by many social psychologists, (such as Jean Twenge), as one of the most significant contributors to America?s world leading mental illness of depression and anxiety! It is actually MORE healthy to live with family no matter at what age than to live alone in complete isolation or with a stranger roomate! Jean Twenge specifically points this out in her book. See below!


?A lot of people in America spend a great deal of time living alone. Twice as many 15 to 24 yr olds lives in one person households now compared to 1970. More than 1 out of 3 Americans aged 24 to 29 lives alone or with a non familial roommate. Isolation and loneliness readily lead to anxiety and depression. A mountain of evidence links loneliness and being alone with negative mental health outcomes. I often feel that many of us are one breakup or one move away from depression - our roots are not deep enough, our support systems too shallow?. (Generation Me, pg 115)   

Perhaps, in some situations it is unhealthy such as situations where the parents are doing everything for their son or daughter such that the individual never grows as a person or never learns how to function independently. But in most cases of adult children living at home, this is not the case. Most pay some form of rent or help with the bills, and do their own cooking, laundry and cleaning. It?s just a simple case of family living together, one?s age just shouldn?t matter.


"Our growing tendency to put the self first leads to unparalleled freedom, but it also creates an enormous amount of pressure on us to stand alone. This is the downside of the focus on the self- when we are fiercely independent and self-sufficient, our disappointments loom large because we have nothing else to focus on?. (Generation Me, pg 109-110)

While Americans may not want to hear it, the science proves that this stand alone ethos is what is killing our mental health. The idea that parents must kick out their kids at 18 so they can live alone all in the name of becoming ?independent? is mostly an American thing. Most of the non western world does not follow this creed. As any Latino, Asian, or Russian or European and you will see this is not a taboo thing in most of the world. Only in the Western countries is this taboo.???

We are suffering from deppression and anxiety as a result of living in lonliness due to this stand alone/live alone independent ethos. Many people reading this will claim how happy and indpendent they are living alone and this may be true for some, but as Jean Twenge?s work shows, the science says differently for most.??????





Foreign woman do not care about? your ?career? status or income


The fact is, any man who has extensive experience dating foreign women will tell you that generally speaking, foreign women could care less about what you make or where you work (i.e. you work at Walmart or flip burgers at Burger King ? for most of them, it doesn?t matter). They are more concerned with the things that REALLY matter such as your character, and who you are as a human being, or how you treat others, than they are about anything else. As long as you are a responsible hard working man, (as in not lazy), they accept you for who you are regardless of the type of job you have. I have found that foreign women are far less judgmental in just about everything. They tend to "accept you for who you are" as long as you treat them with kindness and respect and decency. While there are some American woman who are the same way, (as previously mentioned, country and small town woman tend to be more accepting) generally speaking, by far and large, the majority of them simply arn?t. Foreign woman just want a man who will never abuse them, and who will simply treat them right . That may sound different from most of today?s Western women who are focused on money, looks, youth, and level of employment.


Also, as alluded to earlier, most American women have rather high minimum income expectations. For example, if you peruse dating sites that allow women to list minimum income requirements such as at, you will notice that MOST of the ladies profiles list minimum income requirements! I find this disheartening and disappointing. Trust me on this difference. You don't have to take my word for it ? join International dating sites and find out for yourself. You simply do not find minimum income requirements on foreign woman profiles, and most of the time you will notice that Foreign born woman residing in the US do not list minimum income requirements either. The dating profile comparisons makes the evidence clear cut and obvious. See the dating profile comparison chart I put together for more about these dfifferences .? It's such a breath of fresh air to be allowed to be yourself and not be measured by such artificial ways such as the title of your job or the size of your wallet. The gentleman who runs puts it best when he said the following statement:



?foreign women value material wealth less than women in the Upper Tier countries. Lower tier woman are also satisfied with less material wealth, not having been brought up with such excesses that are presented in the wealthier nations. Because they?ve never experienced the type of wining and dining Upper Tier women expect, Lower Tier women don?t expect you to roll out your wallet for expensive meals or pricey gifts. Spending a little here and there will often go a long way. In lower tier cultures, the humble women really don?t care if you take them to cheap restaurants, stores, malls, or hotels. They only care about your companionship. Much less attractive American women will often complain if you take them to a place that isn?t considered ?hip,? or ?in.? Some even demand you take them to such places?or just take them home. I know because this has happened to me on several occasions. Why take crap from demanding, egotistical Upper Tier/Western culture women when there are hundreds of thousands of beautiful, grateful young women in the Lower Tier countries who appreciate anything you do for them!?



Not ALL Western woman are as characterized below, but generally speaking, the below comparisons have quite a bit of truth to them


On Financial Setbacks:
Westernized Woman: ?So what are you going to do about it?
Foreign woman: ?Maybe I can get some overtime to help out.?


On Shopping:
Westernized Woman: ?I just have to have that Vuitton purse/Tiffany bracelet/etc..?
Foreign woman: ?I wonder if I can find a first-class copy.?


After receiving a gift:
Westernized Woman: Says ?thanks? while instantly comparing it to the version owned by her most ostentatious friend.
Foreign woman: ?Thanks, but you really didn?t need to do this.?

Guys, if you haven't dated "real" foreign women (ps- Americanized foreign woman don?t count!), how would you know these differences in attitudes? For men who havent traveled and dated foreign woman, the only thing you have to fall back on is American cultural stereotypes about foreign woman. How accurate can those be? And herein lies the problem and why my motto is "Inspiration through education.? Most men haven't traveled and dated overseas and hence their exposure to foreign women and their attitudes are usually limited to local foreign born? "Americanized" women who have already been infected to a large degree by our culture of? feminism and materialism.


Here is an Excellent example (U tube video) describing the problem with many American ladies today?


Differences in intellectual depth, Refinement, and Culture


All men (including myself) who have traveled and dated woman from certain particular countries such as Russia, Europe, and Latin America will attest to the fact that generally speaking, (not in all cases, ..just GENERALLY), foreign woman seem to be somewhat more sophisticated, cultured, mature, classy, proper, and more refined than the average American female. (Perhaps an exception would be older American woman in their 40?s or above).


As an average American male who had previously never traveled or dated abroad, I would have never guessed it. In fact, I would have guessed just the opposite! It just goes to show how powerful our media machine is when it tells Americans that everything outside our nation?s borders is less, inferior, and repressed.


Hence, Ive learned that class, intellect, and sophistication quite often have very little to do with money. One of the classiest ladies I ever met in my life was from Peru. Her family had little money, she was not even college educated, but her degree of class, intellect, and sophistication far exceeded that of the average? American woman by a mile. In fact, I almost felt she was out of my league too, well, she probably was! LOL


More on this from others below:

?Another difference with many foreign woman is their intellect.? Compared to the US, women in Russia/Europe have a much richer and refined intellectual life, are more cultured, higher educated, have a broader knowledge of the world, and speak many more languages (most of them speak between 2 and 5 languages while most American women speak only their own). In contrast, not only do most young women in the US not value having an intellectual life, but they lack curiosity as well, and so many can?t even hold an intelligent conversation. While a higher percentage of older women in the US can hold somewhat of an intelligent conversation, the typical young American female lacks depth and can?t say much beyond ?yeah?, ?really?, and ?cool?, which is sad but true.  This makes it difficult to connect with them or find common ground with them, as there is not much substance to them to work with.  In fact, I?d say the tremendous difference between the ability of young women to hold a conversation in the US vs abroad is almost as apparent as the weight difference. One thing can be said for sure though, in pretty much all countries outside the USA, women are either more cultured or more modest, one or the other, or both. It?s no surprise that Russian/European women also generally have much more variety in their interests and passions, which makes them much more interesting people as well.  They have a love for exploring new things, expressing and expanding themselves, and maximizing their experiences and passions in life.  Again, the slightest interaction with them reveals this obvious difference compared to their US counterparts.  European and Russian women who visit America often report that one of their first impressions is that the women there have no real interests (compared to them at least; by their standards).?




??????????? More about what Winston Wu is talking about is shown below where Social Psychologist Jean Twenge talks about typical conversations between

??????????? Today?s young American teenage woman


?A sample my space page typical of high school girls, ? I love 2 chill with my friends and parTAYYY ON THE WEEKEND!...I love whip cream LOL I love having fun and just being stupid and wild! He he I luv 2 SHoP so Maybe one of you guys can take me shopping sometime!? (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 114)


?Jennifer is a polite, soft spoken teen who is close to her parents and active in her church. But Jennifer?s My Space page paints a much different picture. ?Suck it slo, Ho!? reads the headline. In her bio, she warns ?all you bitches? not to bother her because she knows ?a lot if big ass [guys], ya?ll! Another female student, only 14, uses a picture of herself in a low-cut dress and several pictures of Victoria?s secret models, all set to a song called ?Give it up to me.? (The narcissism Epidemic? pg 107)

?The sexual aspects of My Space have drawn lots of attention, but the aggressive and anti social attitudes often expressed there are almost as shocking ? and just as consistent with a culture of narcissism. Of course plenty of My Spacers talk about how much they love their friends, but the ?Don?t screw with me? attitude is very common. One man?s username is ?salute me bitch? and another is ?$you just do you and imam do me$) One teen girl wrote , ?If you don?t lyk me for me, then fuck you, your NOT worth my time.? (Two sentences later she adds, paradoxically, ?I am easy to get along with.?) (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 115)


?The average teen now spends a full half hour a day listening to songs that describe degrading sex. i.e. ?Any Bitch! Wait til you see my dick. Imma beat that pussy up? (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 225)?

?All these messages are consistent with a growing culture of narcissism, with its rampant materialism, aggression toward others, vanity, shallow sexuality, and rabid desire for attention and fame.? (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 114)???????

Obvioulsy, these examples above are referring to high school kids, BUT, Jean Twenge specifically points this out for a reason. It?s? because this is so common with young girls in America today and a lot of this attitude and behaviour carries through with these ladies into adult hood. In contrast, Foreign woman of a similar age of non western cultures do not talk like this, even in their more immature? teenage years.???


Differences in cultural refinement and intellect?

Source - (

CNN Article on an American foreign exchange student?s experience in Paris

?Dinnertime was a great example because every night of the week, whether it was a Wednesday or a Friday, it would be an experience that included a three-course meal and lively conversation, Scott said. Afterward, the family would listen to classical music. They never sat in front of the television with a box of pizza and zoned out, never,"?

"I would attend at least two dinner parties a week when I was there... and I wouldn't really (know a lot about) the guests. I wouldn't know what they did for a living, but yet I would know the best book they read recently or the most interesting film they saw or the art exhibit that they went to. They loved to discuss these areas of life but they don't overshare details about their personal lives."

"They just observed these formal protocols and manners and etiquette were very important to them. They used their best china and their best crystal on a regular basis. ... They used the nicest things that they had on a daily basis and it elevated every experience that we had."


News article discusses intelligence of the US population

Source -

?All of the data over the last 20 years show that Americans are not very bright, and not even the bright ones are very bright?it?s not merely a question of IQ. A Marist poll released on July 4, 2011 showed that 42 percent of American adults are unaware that the U.S. declared its independence in 1776, and this figure increases to 69 percent for the under-30 age group. Twenty-five percent of Americans don?t know from which country the United States seceded. A poll taken in the Oklahoma public school system turned up the fact that 77 percent of the students didn?t know who George Washington was, and the Texas Board of Education recently voted to include a unit on Estee Lauder in the history curriculum, when they don?t have one on the first president. Nearly 30 percent of the American population thinks the sun revolves around the earth or is unsure of which revolves around which. Etc. etc. How can such a population grasp a structural analysis of American history or politics? They simply aren?t capable of it.?




American woman often use sex as weapon


?The following are partial excerpts from Dr Laura?s book regarding how American woman use sex as a weapon which is mostly unheard of with woman in other cultures of the world,?. ?cut him off from sex because they?re annoyed about something? (Doctor Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg xiv) and she also says? ?the use of sex to punish or control (You didn't do what I wanted)?. ??Dr Laura further states that woman have a sense of hostility towards men regarding the issue of sex. She states:

?It is astonishing to which female society denigrates a man?s sex drive, reducing him to merely a rutting animal with no deeper context. Male sexuality is another subject that seems to elicit hostility in many woman. A stay at home mother, Jessica belongs to a number of groups, and the talk about sex is always anti male. The majority of the woman are just tired and see their husbands as selfish for ?wanting some?. (Dr. Laura, Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, pg 126-134)?


One of Dr Laura's listeners wrote something that I think is very common with American woman?s attitudes regarding sex that is absent with most foreign woman :


"before I was married I used sex to get what I wanted. Now I have what I've always wanted, I view sex as useless. I now realize I have taken him for granted and pushed aside his emotional and psychological needs"       



Foreign woman generally prefer men much older than themselves

Another issue worth mentioning that our older readers who are 38 and older need to pay strong attention to is the age sensitivity that most American women have.? For example, I think we can all pretty much agree that most of the time, (though not always of course, but usually), American women 18 to 27 yrs old will generally not date a man in his 40's or above. For clear cut evidence of this age sensitivity, just visit American dating sites such as Looking at American women profiles on dating sites, one can clearly see that these ladies?s age preferences typically will only flex 4-5 years higher than themselves when it comes to dating older men. I have a close friend who is 43 and he is constantly running into this brick wall with younger American women. Whenever he manages to have a younger woman interested in him, they quickly lose interest as soon as they discover his age. It's a constant problem for him. Compare this with foreign ladies profiles who usually advertise that they want men 10-20 years older. You older guys need to pay special attention to this difference, it's worth repeating ? most foreign women actually WANT, PREFER, and DESIRE much older men! It?s 100% TRUE! The reason for this is because the woman over there are hard wired differently than American women who are mainly into youth, sex appeal, flash, and looks. Foreign women on the other hand are into family, faith, and security. Because of this diffference, foreign woman prefer men who are more "mature" and "settled" (hence much OLDER ). They want a man with enough maturity who can handle marriage and who is ready for marriage and less likely to still be chasing skirts or sewing their oats.. Such ?settle down? traits are not important to American woman until they reach much older ages (such as upper 20?s to mid 30?s) when they start thinking more serioulsy about marriage. I?m only pointing this out so that older men who may be reading this will realize that while they may be "over the hill" and "undesirable" to sexy young American women, they are a prime catch in the eyes of young foreign woman.


While we are on this subject, I want to bring up a subject that I notice many older American men are very concerned about. And that is that many men believe that a younger woman is not mature enough for a meaningful relationship. My advice is to not make the mistake of believing that a Foreign girl is as immature as her American/Western counterparts. The majority of girls in many foreign countries have been working since their mid-teens, not for the purpose of buying the latest fashions, but to contribute to their immediate family's total income. As a result, you will find that the majority of these  girls are very responsible for their age. With responsibility comes maturity. You will be pleasantly surprised at a foreign girl's level of thoughtfulness, regardless of her age.


See this U tube clip from a man who lives in the Philipipines talking about this age issue (see 6:25 to 9:44)


Lastly, it is truly strange how American culture is so? prude about age differences. Only in the Anglo-world are age differences (i.e. 10-30 yrs) considered inappropriate. To me, it is clearly evident that Anglo culture has a hidden and latent pedophiliac tendency that people are afraid to admit. Americans see pedophelia where it doesn't exist. So, who's the pervert: the Anglo nations that freak out about such a relationship and that it's "wrong", or the nations where it's happened for thousands of years successfully, and such a thing is considered natural and healthy? The West has a twisted and prudish view of sex and relationships that most cultures do not have.



Foreign woman are marriage minded at much younger ages



In America, dating is not really considered a serious thing, it?s done in a casual manner. We have ?hook ups? as one night stands or very short lived commitment free casual sexual relationships after which we just move on from one partner to another while thinking nothing of it. However, foreign woman are programmed differently. They tend to think of dating and relationships as something serious leading to marriage. We?ve all heard the American cultural phrase "Girls just wanna have fun", right? Many woman of today want to enjoy their singles life (partying, dating, bar hopping, and one night stands etc) much like that of the typical mindset of men. As Jean Twenge states in her research (as quoted above in purple), women of today?s generation view and approach dating and sex the same as men. This means they delay marriage much longer than they once used to. Of course, some woman delay marriage for other reasons such as preferring to establish their careers. Either way, both of these factors result in woman of today not having marriage and settling down much on their mind until they hit their upper 20?s and early 30?s. In addition, when you read American dating site profiles, you will notice that a large percentage (perhaps 30%-40%) of the woman?s profiles state that they are not looking for a relationship or anything serious. On the other hand, 90% of foreign woman state they are looking for a serious relationship or are marriage minded even at very young ages. Im not saying this difference is right or wrong, Im just pointing out this difference. The important result of this differential is that older men can have a very successful and happy marriage with woman as young as 20 to 30 years younger than themselves , because even very young foreign ladies are already marriage minded which matches up well with the desires of older Western men. They both are seeking the same thing in life despite such a wide spread in ages.



I want to take a moment to share a real life personal story relating to this subject. I once met an American girl for a coffee date at Starbucks. During our talk, I mentioned to her that I am at the stage of my life where I am ready for marriage and familyI was 43 yrs old at the time and she was 36. Her reply was ?Steve, don?t take this in a negative way, but just a bit of helpful advice, I would?nt mention that with woman you meet?. So, there you have it. I really wasn?t too surprised to hear this because Ive always known that many American woman think this way. (Note- I didn?t say I wanted to marry ?her? for god?s sake! LOL) It?s quite sad that American woman see men who are seeking something as honorable as marriage as being desperate or creepy or undesirable. I think it just goes back to the dysfunctionality of many American woman who seem to be mainly attracted to the unavailable bad boy/jerk types while finding the normal descent good guys as undesirable. Our research section of this site documents Dr Laura Schlessinger talking about this ?bad boy? dysfunctionality syndrome of American woman. Foreign woman on the other hand , aboslutley LOVE to hear such a thing from a man! Fact is, the average foreign woman has no interest in the ?player? or ?bad boy? types. They will kick that type of man to the curb! This is a reflection of how healthy foreign womens? values are and how well adjusted their moral compass is. They simply want nothing to do with the jerk types. But many American woman seem drawn to the bad boy/jerk types like a moth to a flame. It?s amazing when you experience this about foreign woman. The mindset of foreign woman in this regard is just so completely opposite of most American woman!????




Typical story of what men experience on internet dating sites



Below are posts I found on the inerrnet that brings home the point so well


I think most of us will admit there's a lot of wonderful desirable western women but the best are already involved or married and the remaining few, without excessive baggage and bad attitudes are in high demand. Also, I usually took second place behind their pet, girl friends, career and, finances.


The estimated rate is about 20 men per woman on this site. I know of a woman who was attractive and took her pic down she was so overwhelmed with emails it freaked her out. This place is NOT reality. Because soooo many average women receive sooo many emails,
a '6' thinks she's an '8'. Because soooo many guys receive NO emails ( I've received ONE polite response to 20 sent emails ) a guy who's an 8 in the real world thinks he's a 6 in here. Hence I see guys who are good looking ( not myself) who are flipping out because they're not receiving any responses.




Let's examine an example of a personal ad from a typical Kana woman 50 years old who has kept herself in reasonable shape and is still attractive.
More than likely her younger beauty allowed her to marry well and she has reaped the financial rewards of her prior marriage.

Attractive man between 45 and 55 with a great smile who loves to dance.
Must be financially secure and love to travel.
Must love pets and sports.
Must reside within a one hundred mile radius.
Must be a Protestant

Even if I met half of her demands (which I don't) I'm turned off by her spoiled and demanding attitude. Regardless, I answer her ad telling her about me as I really am with my best picture. Some respond with half hearted emails between their weekend excursions and trips abroad.

It doesn't take me long to realize that I'm fighting a really tough battle for her affections. It's obvious I'm not lighting her fire. Rolling Eyes
I refuse to settle for anymore half hearted relationships and even though I know there are some very nice women who are unattractive, I just can't get into the spirit of it.
Luckily, I find by chance an ad from a lovely foreign lady who issues little or no demands and who is a simple person like myself. She's only seeking love and marriage with a kind and decent man.

When I answer her ad she's totally enthusiastic and makes me feel like I'm the greatest guy in the world.
She has no little or no apparent animosity towards men at all.
She's totally genuine.?


Look at ANY publication containing "personals" ads. The women want someone who looks a certain way, and who has certain "social skills" such as dancing or clever conversation, someone who is interesting and exciting and seductive. Now go to my Web page ( and look at what the girls say they want. It?s all pretty simple, really. Over and over they state that they are happy to settledown FOREVER with a MAN who is willing to try to hold down a steady job and be a loving and understanding husband and father. This will get you NOWHERE with an American girl!






Internet dating does not work for men due to woman having the upper hand. But the tables are turned with international dating sites?


One thing that has been totally consistent throughout my life is the abysmal results Ive had with American internet dating sites. Despite being a decent looking man, I?ve never had any success with internet dating other than having the ?undesireables? try to hit me up. LOL. The only women that ever messaged me were always overweight and often had kids in tow. As far as outbound messaging went, my experience is pretty much in line with what most men experience with internet dating in America, which is that I could message 100 descent looking woman and get maybe 1 or 2 responses. But even those few who responded would always eventually flake out on me by the 2nd or 3rd message and just dissapear. I could never figure out why this was the case. It was always a mystery to me. Then one day I decided to educate myself by digging into the facts about internet dating. What I found was astonishing! American women truly have the upper hand in internet dating in America. According to the research out there, the reason for this is that on these American dating sites, men outnumber women by an average of at least 20 percent! The ladies often complain of receiving too many messages to the degree that it overwhelms them. Ive often read about woman saying they have to cancel their profiles because they cant keep up with all the messages they get. (By the way, this is exactly what men experience on international dating sites where the tables are turned in the men?s favor). One example of this is a American woman profile I found that said the following:


?Well i just joint with this website but i was suprise coz i got almost 400 message of guys from this website thats crazy !!!! but i cant read all thats messages thats too much for me.but sound good.I'm Asian/france woman,i live in bay area.california,yes, i'm hot and sexy Asian woman?


So ya see, this causes them to be super picky, makes them develop spoiled attitudes, and get big heads. This just makes things that much harder for the men. In addition, attractive ladies don't have to use internet dating to find a mate because they have so many men chasing after them in the real world. (See proof of this in our Research Section). Setting this problem aside, there are other drawbacks at hand. One of our fan mails put it best when he said:


?? ??I tried a lot of the dating websites looking for a eligible local woman but have gotten so disgusted with most of their requirements & attitudes that I've decided to abandon that route?. 


Every man I?ve talked to has told me that this is their experience also. Internet dating in America really sucks for the American male. But, there is a secret out there that many men don?t know about. If that same "average Joe" joins an international dating site, he will suddenly become overwhelmed with hundreds of replies! And what's more amazing is that many such replies will come from beautiful, highly educated, and even intellectual ladies, not necessarily poor and uneducated ladies as the American stereotypes and media would have you believe. 


Simply put, on American dating sites, American women have all the choices, while on international dating sites, the tables are completely reversed and the men have all the choices! The bottom line is that dating success is all about LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION



Why American men have such an incredible advantage with international dating??

One needs to understand that in the overseas dating scene, there are many things that work in men's favor. For starters, as a general rule, single woman far outnumber single men. This is proven as fact by stats for Russia and most of Latin America and some parts of Asia. (Though, there are a few countries where this isnt true such as China and? India). One article I found from a gentlemen who is very experienced with dating all over the world puts this into perspective. He said:

??The one thing that always gets me, is that I?ve never heard a woman in the US complain once about the tough female competition in the United States. But in Latin America, no matter what country I?ve been to, I always run into women who complain about their local dating environment. But when it comes to American women, I?ve never had one complain in my presence. ?

Besides the fact that single women (of dating age)outnumber single men in most of Latin American, Europe, former Soviet republics, and Asia (Asia -except India and china where you have a lot of female infanticide) foreign women seem to truly "NEED" men. This is the biggest difference of all. Foreign woman put off a vibe that shows they are receptive to being approached. This is a far cry from America where you usually find women unreceptive or even worse, act as if you are being a burden to them for just trying to talk to them or get to know them.


The Bar scene in America


On the topic of bars and nightclubs, one post I found on the net describes the bar scene in America quite well:


?What is a bar/club scene in America? Bunch of wanna-be's, hot looking sluts in night clubs huddling with their female friends, not talking to "strange

guys", because supposedly most of the guys around them are creepy anyways (never heard such word from a Ukrainian girl in MY LIFE!) So, the "bar

scene" is complete crap only in America.?


?Another person posted:


??Bars and clubs? Wow...those women are just falling down drunk, grinding on themselves...etc. You know, shitty as they were even in the 90s, clubs

used to be a place to meet women; now the women just go there to get shitfaced. I almost never see men and women at clubs interracting unless they were already in a group together.?


Another post said:


Anglo societies are repressed and anti-social. I have never understood the "bar scene" where women just go to hang out with their friends and are scared shitless if a guy approaches them. I assume women go to bars and clubs to meet men. Apparently a lot of them don't! So how in God's name are men supposed to meet women in the USA?



Another post said:


?Here in the states, girls get in for free, they get preferential treatment, the girls dance with other girls and many girls. When they want to feel better about themselves, they go to night clubs with the plan in mind to harshly shoot down guys who ask them out. They say they get a huge ego boost out of it. Also, the girls dress like PROSTITUTES, but yet, they get mad when you look at them too long, or pay them too much attention. Unbelievable! Their breast are hanging out, all their legs are showing, and you can even see their sexy painted red toes through their clear high heel sandals, but yet, they have the nerve to say that any guy looking at them too long is a "weirdo". And watch out for the bouncers too, they are DUMB broke former jocks who will always take the side of the female.?


Another post said:


??When girls are in groups and you talk to them, they laugh and go away talking among themselves saying "look at that needy creepy guy". When you

?? are in the bar or a club, girls are almost always in groups and they almost never talk to you.? ?


Based on what I observe about American culture, most Americans seem to rely (to a significant degree) on bars and clubs as the main method to meet members of the opposite sex. But overseas, bars and clubs are not the main method that people use to meet people. One gentleman describes it accurately when he posted as follows:


?It's interesting to hear guys (like Winston WU of happier say that in foreign countries they were able to meet women on buses, trains, shopping malls and in stores. Now meeting women this way is not possible in America, so maybe that's why the "bar scene" is so popular in the US. When Winston traveled to eastern Europe and Russia he was able to meet women without having to walk into a bar or nightclub! How nice would that be if it were that easy here in the US! It's sad that meeting people in America is reduced to going to bars and clubs on Friday and Saturday nights and hoping that you meet somebody. The atmosphere in bars and clubs is very intimidating, the music is loud, it's crowded and the people tend to act like jerks. Gee, what a great atmosphere to meet people in.?


?Another post describes what we encounter in America when you try to meet someone outside of the bar scene:


?Starbucks I thought would be a better place to meet least the girls would be sober, right? But you run into the same brick wall barrier you do everywhere else. The women don't acknowledge you, much less talk to you. Starbucks is a good example of the social isolation that Winston talks about in his articles. People sit right down next to you without saying a word or even looking your way.?



Excellent U tube video on why the American bar and club scene is a waste of time for men:

(In this video, this gentlemen discusses how in the American club/bar scene is a waste of time for men)


Bachelorette parties signify the new low morals and standards of many woman in America today

?I tend to think that white women the world over are opting for the ?Girls Gone Wild Experience?. Low morals, low thoughts, and low expectations. 
Thanks that we have women such as in the Philippines as one of our last bastions of hope in finding decent women.?

(Source - Anonymous internet comment)


While I do not think that the comment above applies to ALL Western woman, (of course not), I do firmly believe there is certainly a grain of truth to it based on the trends that we are seeing  with more and more Western woman of today. Think about it for a second. How common is it today to see bachelorette parties of woman with dildos and woman carrying around a penis and a wedding vail with condoms in it? This is 100% unheard of in most other cultures and used to be unheard of in America until the late 1980?s onward. It just reflects poor values and lack of respect that we give to marriage in our culture today. This is how we celebrate marriage?? Really?














Obvioulsy, not ALL American woman behave these ways as shown in this sample video, but FAR TOO MANY DO! Foreign woman do not do this!!!!! They are more conservative and classy.


Bachelorette party



MYTH ? Foreign woman just want a green card and your money


BBC News article explains the TRUTH behind WHY foreign woman from many parts of the world seek Western husbands. The gender imbalances exist in most of russia, Latin America, and many parts of Asia. And as this artcile explains, Gender imablance is only but one problem these woman face. The Machismo? attitudes with men in many 3rd world countries leaves little to be desired for most of these ladies.




Latvian man shortage leaves women lost for love

By Damien McGuinness BBC News, Riga

Group of women in Latvia

??????????? ????????? Women outnumber men by 8% in Latvia


In the video below, the news organization ?Russia Today? also reports on the severe man shortage in much of Russia:??????



Besides the news reports above, the next best explanation as to why foreign woman like American or foreign husbands can be found in Mark Davis?s ebook at European Dream connections. Below Mark talks about the first time he discovered the global dating secret while he was on a dinner date with a Brazilian Beauty. She revealed to him the dating secret of why American men are considered Gold in many non industrialized countries of the world and it has absolutley nothing to do with money or green cards.


Mark Edward Davis ? Why foreign woman want American men.


?She told me that her story was not uncommon. She said, "It is very difficult for women here to find a good man. We know that men can't stay with just one woman ? that?s just not possible in Brazil.  They don't want to be faithful to their wives and they don't care about their family. They provide no money for the home and woman has to do all the work. Most times this man will come and take what money is left ? so the smart woman has to hide it. ?The good man is the one who wants to be part of the family. He will bring home some of his money from his work and actually enjoys being with his wife and kids. Most women in Brazil would just hope for a good man. ?Every day, when I was married, I woke up thinking about my husband. I wanted to make sure every meal was his favorite food, his house was clean, and he was happy. I would do anything for a good man and build my world around him - even now." It took me a while to fully grasp what she was saying. A thought began to grow as I related her story to myself. It slowly dawned on me, "I am a good man." I like being connected to a family. I want to have a relationship where I look forward to spending time with my wife. I am proud to be the bread-winner and financial provider for my family. I am GOLDEN here! I have been fishing in the wrong fishing hole with the wrong bait! I was trying to bring what I had to offer to a market that didn't find it valuable. I began to believe I was not very valuable. I had been trying to sell ice to Eskimos. One of the Greatest Secrets is that I am one of the most valuable commodities in the world to women in most other parts of the world! The most beautiful and exotic women in the world would find deep satisfaction to wake up each morning and pour themselves into the love of a good man. But for most of them, the love of a good man is a dream that will never come true - if she could only find one. If you are a good man who wants to be faithful to the love of a good woman, be part of her life, and be a financial provider; then you are one of the most valuable things on this planet to most every woman in the world - outside of the industrialized nations. I couldn't wait to get back to the U.S. and tell Steve about what I'd discovered. It just made sense. It resonated deeply. I had allowed women in the U.S. to define my value. Yes, I allowed that to happen, but I didn?t have a good frame of reference to help define my masculine value. I was worth a lot; but not to the group I had been dating. I cannot begin to understate the difference this understanding makes. Being a good man is gold. I'm not talking about being an arrogant or abusive man who dominates women as a power trip. I'm talking about the average American man who is the backbone of this country. He works hard, brings home his paycheck to support family, works on his house over the weekend, and enjoys vacationing with his significant other.He is faithful, and dedicated, yet often unappreciated. The good man will rarely be more valued in this world than he will in these cultures. As I continued my travels to Ukraine and Costa Rica and other parts of the world, I learned that this value of the "good man" was echoed again and again. In Eastern Europe (Russia, Ukraine and the Slavic nations), the stories may vary slightly from Latin America or the Far East, but the results are the same ? the good man is gold.?

?I've heard women talk about the attitudes of men. They say, "If I'm sick, my boyfriend will just say, 'call me when you're better' and I better not call him until I am. That's just the way it is." Another woman told me that women always have to stay beautiful or their man will just move on. You will rarely ever see an overweight woman in these parts of the world. They have a saying among women, "A woman must always be beautiful; a man only has to be better looking than a monkey." Do you think you'll ever hear those words spoken in the U.S.? And, here?s the best part, the sex is focused on pleasing the man so they can keep him. I just tell you all of these things so you will realize the value you bring to the table. We?ll bring this into better perspective when we talk about masculinity and femininity from different cultural perspectives.?

?Another painful fallout from masculinity gone wrong is domestic abuse. The overblown male machismo culture of domination and physical abuse is considered common ? and rarely punished.?


?Take your money? They aren't interested in your money ? they want your heart. We just covered this, but I'll say it again: why would they want to live outside of their hometown? They wouldn't if they could find love there.?


?Apparently, many of these men seem to find little motivation to bring their paychecks home ? even when they have a monogamous relationship and children. The common story seems to be that the women work so the family has money.What is the consequence for this lifestyle? According to CIA world statistics, the average life expectancy for men is 59 in Russia, 62 in Ukraine, and 65 in Colombia.Alcohol is a major contributing factor to these shortened life spans?


?WESTERN MEN - At first glance, those men make us look like heroes by contrast. American men want to be connected with their families. We participate in our wives pregnancies and delivery. We change diapers and teach our kids to play baseball. We take our wives on dates and plan our vacations as family events. We want to be faithful to our wives, because that is what good husbands do. To have an affair also means we failed in our marriages somehow. We desire closeness and intimacy with our women. These are good and noble aspirations. Our families come first and we bring home our entire paychecks to support our family. We don?t abuse our spouses or children. And we lavish upon them the highest standard of living in the modern age.?


?It is very competitive for one of these women to find a good man. Therefore, when they do have a man in their lives, they will focus on pleasing him ? and their pleasure is in making him happy. In this competitive environment they often become skilled in seduction and sensuality within the relationship. They work hard to keep him focused on her so he has no reason to look around. I still find it cute that my gorgeous younger wife watches out for other women who might be looking at me!?


?Don?t underestimate these women. The only thing missing from their lives, as they see it, is romantic attention. Otherwise, they are generally satisfied with their lives. They don?t need you to save them and take them away from a horrible life of poverty. That is not the way they view their world and would be insulted if you were to suggest such a thing.?


What American men need to realize is that contrary to American cultural beliefs and stereotypes, most foreign women are not desperate to leave their country. Yes, foreigners (mainly men) do come to America to find work, but not because they love the United States and want to live here. They come simply to earn a higher wage. Ask most foreigners what they think of the United States and they will probably all tell you that they prefer to live in their home country and only stay in the United States because of availability of work and good paying jobs.

This idea that everyone wants to come to the US is perpetrated by American cultural stereotypes. It comes from the same ole narcissitic belief that Americans have that America is the greatest place on earth while the rest of the world is downtrodden and oppressed. I understand patriotism and that?s all fine and dandy, but this kind of arrogance and naivity that most Americans have about thinking the whole world admires us and wants to come here is rather naive. I do understand why people think this way as our media is very powerful and brainwahses us into thinking this way but nothing could be farther form the truth.?

Regarding the risk factor, there are good and bad foreign women in international dating just as there are good and bad woman in the USA. That's life, and is true anywhere.

Internet Post I found that puts it best!

?The media almost always shows other countries as backward shitholes whose inhabitants' only dream is to go to the US and be Americans. This fills Americans with smug and bloated pride and makes them look down on other cultures and nationalities. And that goes for the most/ overwhelming majority/ of the US population. Plus most have never been abroad except to Mexico. The media scares us with stories of violence and poverty in the world (funny how the US is racing to the bottom - its just behind Mexico with kidnappings and violence).?


Fact is that many of these foreign women are educated, cultured, and have professional careers. Many live in beautiful countries, eat well, and are healthy. They don?t want your stupid green card. So you ask, why would a Foreign lady want an American man? Well, the answer to this is multi faceted. For starters, Asian and Latin cultures teach men that infidelity is a normal part of manhood, and that it is an unwritten right in these cultures for men to have affairs. In addition, the male/female gender imbalances greatly favor the men, so the men have the upper hand and can get away with having mistresses and girlfriends on the side. One of the most important gifts you can offer a woman is your fidelity - something that is not so common in a foreign lady?s country. American men have a solid reputation around the world as being faithful and as good husbands. THAT is why they like us, not because of money or green cards.

Most foreign woman simply dream of having a good husband and family. Due to a severe man shortage in many of these countries, there are millions of women who simply do not have a chance at finding husbands with whom they can raise a family with. This is the biggest challenge many foreign ladies face because of the male/female ratio working against them in their home countries. Put yourself in their position for a second and think about what you would do. It?s not an easy decision for most foreign women to consider living in a strange country. They are far more close and connected to their families than we are. Since many of them do not want to live in another country, a man would need to be pretty special in their eyes for them to even consider moving.

On top of that, the quality of men available in their own countries often leaves little to be desired. Many men in these ladies' countries are womanizers and regularly cheat on their wives and girlfriends. Just ask any foreign woman from Asia, russia, or Latino culture about this. Ask them why they want a foreign husband and 99% of the time they will complain about how their local men cheat all the time. American men, on the other hand, have a solid reputation around the world as being good husbands who generally do not cheat on or mistreat their woman. This is the perception foreign women have of American men and is what drives so many to look for a Western husband. As quoted by the United States Immigration Services Study to Congress on International Marriages:


USCIS Report to Congress

?Why do foreign women want American husbands? Many sources suggest that these women are searching for a "better life" in terms of socio-economic factors--they do, for the most part, come from places in which jobs and educational opportunities for women are scarce and wages are low. However, when the women themselves are asked this question, the answer generally indicates an attraction to American men (they look like movie stars) and an aversion to native men. Americans, they say, make good husbands while Filipino (Thai/Indonesian/Russian/etc.) men do not. Americans are thought to be faithful to their wives, while the native men are cruel and run around with other women. True or not, this is the perception.?

(Link has since expired -



?In addition, their local men are often boozing it up (i.e. especially in Russia), and are chain smokers, irresponsible, and verbally and physically abusive. Look up abuse rates around the world and you will soon see that men of Western countries are the least abusive men in the world.


See this ese two U tube videos that explain why foreign woman seek Foreign Husbands



Winston Wu of happier abroad has the following to say about debunking this false belief that is so ingrained in American culture:


1) Most of the Filipinas I?ve met or dated here prefer that their boyfriend or husband stay with them in THEIR country.  After all, family is everything to them,?

??? and so they? prefer to remain close to their immediate and extended family.  But if their lover insists, they will try to go overseas.  That right there

??? DEBUNKS this common misconception.  Besides, it is an American myth that most people in other countries want to come to the US.  The well traveled

??? know that is not so.


2) Now, think about this.  If it were all about money or a green card, then why aren?t poor foreign men seeking out American women the way that poor foreign

?? women are? And why aren?t there websites or matchmaking agencies out there for foreign men seeking American women? It?s because there isn?t a market??

?? for it. Very few foreign men would want an American woman, even to get into the US. These men want feminine women, and the denial of their femininity as

? well as their selfish attitude is a huge turn off to foreign men. Also, ask yourself this. If poor foreign women just want money, then what do American women

? want?  A dazzling personality and kind heart?  Not!  They not only want money, but they want it all, perfection in every category! Some guys see everything

? in terms of money and economics. In reality, human beings are very complex, and don?t fit into overly simplistic pet theories like ?She just wants you for??

? money?.  So these one shot labels put together by shallow know-it-all people to try to explain other people just don?t hold.  Perhaps these guys are ?all

? about money? themselves, so they can?t help but assume that everyone else is too.



Another quote from Mark Davis of European connections as to why Foreign woman do not want to leave their country but will only do so for love


?They have lives that are normal to them there. They probably have four generations of family in their hometown. They have friends that they connect with. They may enjoy dancing and spending time with peers in their hometown. They may be? working on a university degree program and leaving would cause problems. So what is their motivation to connect with a foreign man and even consider leaving their homes? I'll say it again and again. They are starved for romance and genuine attention. Here is a universal truth of all women ? foreign or domestic: If a woman falls deeply in love with the man of her dreams she?ll do anything to make that dream come true ? including leaving home and country. Another motivation may be that they are also tired of having to be the only income provider. They would gladly live a happy and full life with a good man from their home town if they could find him.


Again, they define a good man as someone who :

1)pays attention to them

2)provides romantic attention;

3)agrees to bring his paycheck home to contribute to the family;

?4)who won?t cheat on them;

?5)doesn?t get drunk on a regular basis;

?6)who would not harm them.?


*These qualities 1-6 above are not commonly found in men of many non industrialized countries. This is the key to understanding their motivations for American men?



While it is true that many foreigners want to come to America for a better job, we shouldn?t assume that ALL foreigners want to leave their home country. Many are doing just fine where they are and are quite happy and content, even if poor. Most foreign woman will only leave their home, family and country for the purpose of finding a good? man for love and marriage and starting their own family. Such a thing is far more important to them than money ever will be. It is our own American insecurities that make us believe every foreign bride is only after money or a green card. To believe this is to fall victim to the American media machine and miss out on a potential great oppurtunity.



Why American men and Foreign woman are a match made in heaven

Decent and well-off American men are generally viewed as the "cream of the crop" - highly coveted and desirable.... These gentlemen enjoy a great reputation among foreign ladies who perceive them to be respectful, nurturing, responsible, well-educated and financially secure. In addition, these women believe that American men make great husbands, especially in contrast to native men, who are often disrespectful, abusive and unfaithful.

The problem in this country is that the "best in the world" are often paired up with the "worst in the world".... a complete mismatch. It's like a highschool Prom King dating an ugly, domineering and boorish girl. It's very unlikely that this type of relationship will work out. Sadly, this seems to be the case, as the marriages "made in America" have a higher divorce rate (55 to 60 percent) than in the cross-cultural marriages (15 to 20 percent). So why is the risk of divorce so much lower when an American gentleman marries a "mail-order bride"? In a nutshell, it's because our Prom King is marrying a Prom Queen, who is beautiful, intelligent, feminine, appreciative and devoted.

A growing number of affluent American men are going overseas to embrace loverly, young foreign brides. A nearly fourfold increase in foreign women entering the U.S. on fiance(e) visas (over the last 7 years) supports this contention. It's no secret that by pursuing foreign women, men can find much younger, more attractive and devoted partners than what's available at home.



Mark Davis of European Dream Connections


?That?s why I truly believe that there appears to be a perfect ? and natural fit ? between the good masculine men in America and these wonderful foreign women. It?s like a match made in heaven. If I were to boil this all down to a simple idea it would be this: If you are going to pour your heart into the love of a woman ? you just want to know that she is going to pour that much energy back into loving you. As my friend Steve summarized it, ?Mark, I just want you to find a woman who will match your efforts?. Most of these foreign women are willing to pour their lives into the love of a good man? and they want to find someone who will pour themselves back into loving her. What I have found is that the energy between the Golden Man and his foreign wife is growing and dynamic. Their love and willingness to give to each other creates an ongoing momentum that continues to feed both. They feel more in love as time goes by.?




Why I like Filipinas the best - as lovers, playmates, and best friends


An absolute must read!! By Winston Wu of Happier Abroad :?



Some great internet quotes that sum up the uniqueness of the Filipinas


?The typical filipina understands what it is like to be hungry and to do without. She knows how to adapt and to adjust. She has a perspective that is not held by western cultures. She is much less materialistic and more tolerant and more patient. She has much better manners then women from most other cultures. She understands the value of family and community. She appreciates the small things in life and she understands people. She understands the roles that men and women should play in a marriage. She has extraordinary interpersonal skills and communicates well - even though she is usually very shy and reserved in public. And she has a high level of morality, honesty and integrity. These characteristic are all a product of her environment and her culture and they make her very attractive to most men.?





One could write an essay over one hundred pages long about the benefits of having a Filipina girlfriend. Most men appeciate the care, the devotion to family, as well as general sexiness of Filipinas as the main reasons for choosing one. Also, many of them have been severely hurt from a previous relationship with a Westernized lady, and are determined to find someone who will never hurt them again.

For me, the best thing about having a Filipina girlfriend is that I am able to show love, care, and affection and be accepted and loved in return. Growing up, I was constantly told that I need to "man up" and "be more aggressive." In Western culture, men are taught to get what they want by fighting for it. You need to stomp on someone else's head so they won't stomp on your head. I was told that I was not aggressive enough, and that I needed to be a jerk to women. Men told me that I needed to treat my girlfriend like she was a dog and make her beg for a treat. I needed to be the prize.

For a while I actually (regretably) believed that crap. But I quickly realized the nonsense for what it was. My heart changed, and then I met Mahal. I know I can be sweet and caring, and not have to worry about her treating me like a doormat. Westernized women often think that being nice means being weak. In Filipina culture, being nice is returned with kindness, and perhaps a bit of sex too.

When I am with Mahal, I feel like I can be myself. I don't have to walk around all "macho" (whatever that is supposed to mean). I can share my weaknesses, and we can laugh at each other in a supporting way. I have finally realized that it really isn't me that is wrong; for so long I had been with mentally ill people who viewed prosocial people as a weakness. You can't blame a Palm Tree for not growing in Alaska.

For the first time in my life, I have felt unconditional love and acceptance being with Mahal.

To be with someone who values me so much brings out the best in me. I want to be the best lover, the best husband, the best father, and the best servant in her church. I don't have to fear that my efforts will be replied with insult. I can serve her, cuddle her, listen to her, and support her, and not fear rejection. She is the best lady, so I want to be the best lover I possibly can be for her.

I wish all men still looking for their Filipina love lots of good luck !!




USCIS study says men who go abroad for love and marriage are INTELLIGENT, CONSERVATIVE, and HIGHLY EDUCATED


The USCIS report said the following:


?David Jedlicka (1988, cited in Glodava and Onizuka, 1994) surveyed 607 American men seeking mail-order brides and received 206 responses. He found that the men were generally white (94 percent); highly educated (50 percent with two or more years of college, 6 percent with M.D.'s or Ph.D.'s, only five did not complete high school); politically and ideologically conservative; and generally economically and professionally successful (64 percent earned more than $20,000 a year; 42 were in professional or managerial positions). Their median age was 37.?


So, not a bad crowd to be associated with huh? Perhaps it would only make sense that the more educated/intelligent of us are the ones who would be more likely to discover what other parts of the world have to offer. Well, hopefully with more sites like ours spreading the word, more and more of us average Joes can discover this dating secret too.?



?Studies show American woman initiate divorce almost 70% of the time ? reasons not due to abuse!



?Woman in lower tier countries believe in the idea that marriage is for life. When problems do arise, as happens in all relationships, unlike the Upper Tier countries where woman say ?Divorce him, girl?get your half?, the loyal, loving Lower Tier women will do anything to keep their families united.? ( This is the general difference between American and most Non Western cultures regarding marriage/family values.


According to a USCIS report to congress conducted by Robert J. Scholes, PhD with the assistance of Anchalee Phataralaoha, MA :


?It is interesting to note that, based largely on data provided by the agencies themselves (along with the Commission on Filipinos Overseas report cited above), marriages arranged through these services would appear to have a lower divorce rate than the nation as a whole, fully 80 percent of these marriages having lasted over the years for which reports are available.? (Link has since expired -


It is a well documented fact that the divorce rate in America is 50-60%. The USCIS report as just quoted above tells us that the divorce rate when American men marry a foreign woman is only 20%. Hence, it is a statistical fact that the odds of staying married to an American woman are worse than your odds of winning in vegas!! Imagine that!?


As documented in our Research Section , studies show that most of the time when women divorce, it's not due to abusive behaviors by their husbands as many people would presume. One study quotes these women as saying, "I've outgrown him" or "I don?t need him". (See study ). Given how feminism has taught American women to not need men, this shouldn?t be surprising. Our American culture gives us the message that if you don't like something about who you are dating, instead of making an effort to work on it, just dump them as they are easily replaceable. And that casual attitude carries through into marriage also. Women in particular are told by our culture that they must fulfill themselves completely, and if a man gets in the way of that (or if they even THINK he gets in the way) he should be dumped, regardless of the status of the relationship, regardless of the children.  On a personal note, I have a friend who just talked to his x girlfriend the other day. She is now married with two kids. She was telling him that she no longer has sexual attraction to her husband and isnt happy with her marriage. As usually is the case with so many American woman, her story bears out that it?s not because of anything he did bad to her such as drinking or being abusive. She just suddenly decided she doesn?t love him anymore cause she?s lost that lovin feelin. In other words, the only thing that matters is her own self fulfillment. When my friend suggested marriage counseling to her, she became quite irritated at him and said ?David, look, my family just wants me to be happy!?. So ya see, with so many American woman, (disclosure ?not all, but generally speaking) its all about the self and getting ones own needs met. Forget about one?s vows and commitment to the institution of marriage. Forget about the idea that there are some things greater than the self. Forget about trying to make an effort to make the marriage work. With too many American woman, such ideals go by the wayside.


On the other hand, foreign woman have a commitment to marriage that most western women simply do not have. Marry a foreign woman and there's a much greater chance that she'll actually take her wedding vows seriously . For one thing , her culture and her family don't take the concept of divorce lightly. Secondly, they will often stay in a marriage, even if they feel it is less than ideal. They do so for the benefit of the family and due to their belief in the institution of marriage itself. This requires an emotional and spiritual maturity that many (not all) American woman simply don?t have anymore. (You have to look way back to the 50?s for those kind of values).

It seems that everyone seems to have heard stories about foreign women leaving a man after getting her green card. While this is sometimes true, (just like sometimes planes crash yet statistically remain the safest form of transportation) when one actually looks past the ignorant stereotypes and looks at the statistical facts, one sees that international marriages have about 1/3 the divorce rate of American marriages! When most people hear of this, they are often shocked and find it hard to believe. This disbelief is understandable as most of us underestimate the influential power of the American media machine that feeds us our cultural stereotypes such as ?foreign woman are desperate and they?ll do anything to come to America?.? But this 1/3 divorce rate statistic is true and fact. See our Research Section for proof.


I?ll take a moment to share a real life story on this subject. My office mate and I were having a discussion about this topic and one of our co workers overheard us and put his 2 cents into the conversation. This co worker was from Costa Rica and only been in America for 8 years. He said to us ?Guys, woman from my country will stay with you until your last breath! A costa Rican woman will never leave you, no matter how broke you are. She will die with you?. Quite a statement from an outsider?s view on his observation on the differences in the ?marriage is forever? addage and dedication between foreign woman and American woman.??


There is a old fable that describes my point on this subject the best (my point about the factual statistic that American woman initiate divorce almost 70% of the time). It?s called the? The Scorpion and the Frog . It is a fable about a scorpion asking a frog to carry him across a river. The frog is afraid of being stung during the trip, but the scorpion argues that if it stung the frog, the scorpion himself would drown too. Same concept as an american woman who might give lip service to the claim that she doesn?t believe in divorce and that divorce would hurt her too (Yet why do all studies out there show that American woman initiate divorce 70% of the time?)?? The frog agrees and begins carrying the scorpion, but midway across the river the scorpion stings the frog, dooming them both. When the frog asks the scorpion why he did it, the scorpion responds ?it?s my nature?. This fable is used to illustrate the that the behaviour of some creatures is irrepressible. And hence the way that feminism has affected American woman is irrepressible. This story relates to the fact that no matter how much you think your American woman is not the type who is easy to divorce, (after all, we all marry someone who we think could never do such a thing to us right?) one has to recognize the culture she comes from. (America) is a divorce prone and divorce accepting culture. Most other non Western cultures ARE NOT! If she is American, there is a high chance it?s in her nature. How can I say such a judgemental thing you ask? Well, before getting all emotional about this, please just take a look at the facts and statistics. The stats say that almost 70% of the time, it?s the wife who files for divorce (studies show that it?s not due to abuse). You don?t have to believe me, review ALL the statistics available on the internet yourself. Every single statistical study out there confirms this statistic fact. There is no escaping it as factual truth. The research also shows that if you marry a woman who ascribes to feminism?s values, (which is most American woman as most have been raised in our feministic society) , the odds of divorce go up! The research says, ?There is evidence that woman with traditionanl sex role attitudes are indeed less likely to divorce than those with feminists attitudes? (The American Paradox pg 45-46)



And if you are unfortunate to fall into that minority of 20% who end up divorced after marrying a foreign lady, you will likely find that they do not typically behave vindictfully or seek revenge. Many don?t even pursue court action to force alimony or child support. When it comes to Alimony, they will often say? ?I don?t need his money?. I have come across many stories of foreign woman with the following attitude in seperation or divorce situations?..?Im not going to ask him for one dollar, that?s the way Im going to help him realize what kind of special person he had lost?.? What a DIFFERENCE in attitude!! I find such a non selfish attitude refreshing. The foreign woman?s psyche is just so totally different than the American woman?s psyche. Ive dated foreign ladies all my life and countless times Ive witnessed that they really don?t like to pursue legal actions through the courts which I really have always respected and admired about them. Instead, as long as the father of their child is contributing and sincerely making an effort, they allow him to contribute whatever? he can whenever he can. There?s no vindictfulness in trying to ?stick it? to him, which in American divorces, is more common than not. Although Ill be the first to say that a woman should be able to pursue legal action if the X husband is a total flake and not even trying to own up to his responsibilities. Sometimes legal action is absolutely necessary. But my point is that foreign woman are understanding as long as the guy is genuinley trying to pay and is making an effort. Even then, when the guy is a total flake, they still don?t take legal action because their sense of ?I don?t need his money? is so pervasive with them. Its just a different mindset.

A post at dating site message board

Funny thing is, I look at friends on F@cebook and a lot of buds who are married to the domestic variety of women don't look all that happy while the ones with Latin and Asian wives have a huge smile or grin on their face. think a lot of us men want women who will cooperate (work together) instead of compete with us. I personally find foreign women to be quite feminine. I wish I could say the same for American women in general, but I can't, at least not the ones playing the dating game. (



Differences between American and Foreign woman on Alimony and child support

If you are unfortunate to fall into that minority of 20% who end up divorced after marrying a foreign lady, you will likely find that they do not typically behave vindictfully or seek revenge. Obviously, there is nothing wrong with any woman expecting child support or alimony. However, what is really interesting is how? common it is for foreign woman to not pursue court action to force alimony or child support. Anyone who has been around Asian or Latin woman can attest to this observation. When it comes to Alimony, they will often say? ?I don?t need his money?. Many will say ?Im not going to ask him for one dollar, that?s the way Im going to help him realize what kind of special person he had lost?.? What a DIFFERENCE in attitude!! I find such an attitude refreshing. The foreign woman?s psyche is just so totally different than the American woman?s psyche. Ive dated foreign ladies all my life and countless times Ive witnessed that they really don?t like to pursue legal actions through the courts which I really have always respected and admired about them. As long as the father of their child is contributing and sincerely making an effort, they allow him to contribute whatever he can whenever he can. There?s no vindictfulness of trying to ?stick it? to him, which in American divorces, is more common than not. I find it very common to see a spiteful and vindictful attitude by American woman towards their X husbands, and even worse, this often includes the woman trying to prevent her x husband from seeing his children even when he is paying his child support!

Again, I?ll be the first to say that a woman should be able to pursue legal action if the X husband is a total flake and not even trying to own up to his responsibilities. Sometimes legal action is absolutely necessary. But my point is that foreign woman are understanding as long as the guy is genuinley trying to pay and is making an effort. Even then, when the guy is a total flake, they still don?t take legal action because their sense of ?I don?t need his money? is so pervasive with them. Its just a different mindset.

To prove this isnt just my own personal opinion, see this quote below (including the link as proof) by an Asian American woman posting at dating site message board about this mentality. If there was no truth to what I am saying, then I would not have been able to find such a real life post. There is absolute TRUTH to this.??

??And let me tell this to you if we no longer love a man we tell it to his face, we are that gutsy and we can support our self and our children,we don't need his spouse or child support "for he is dead".. This is the mentality of An Asian women whom you American women thinks are submissive?




The EXPLODING trend of men going abroad for love and marriage ?Stats show it?s doubling every 8-10 years


The fact that leading American researchers attest to all this should be a big wake up call to Americans, both men and women. The material presented here along with supporting expert opinions explains the reason for the sharp uptick in the number of American men going overseas for love and marriage. Just like the smart money is exiting the country right now towards foreign investments, the smart ?nice guys? are going abroad for foreign women. Marriage between foreign women and American men is at an all time high, and growing each year. More and more men are saying "enough is enough", and realizing that they have OTHER OPTIONS, realistically BETTER options! In fact, the Tahirih Justice Center, a feminist nonprofit organization in Falls Church, VA, who keeps abreast of international marriage statistics, has even admitted as such when they were quoted as saying, "The number of international marriages in the U.S. has more than doubled between 1999 and 2007." This number had also doubled between 1990 ad 2000! So it seems to be doubling every 8 years. In addition, the daily morning talk show on NBC, Good Morning America, ran a special on men who are going overseas for love and marriage and stated the same statistic - that the number of men who have gone overseas for love and marriage has doubled in the last 8 years. See also the NBC Today Show interview with Happier Abroad advisor Mark Edward Davis, here: I wouldn't be surprised if this figure doubled again by 2015! Unfortunately, today's young American women don't realize that their unrealistic expectations (both materially and in entitlement attitudes) are pricing themselves out of the market. This wave of men going overseas will continue to explode because word of mouth from such sites as this one are helping men wake up to what foreign women have to offer. This is why educating yourself about your options is so critical. The more men who educate themselves about the differences between foreign and American woman, the more they will opt for a foreign women for love and marriage. Not only is going overseas a viable option, the overwhelming evidence shows it to actually be a more successful and better option for relationship success! 


However, by no means are we suggesting that ALL foreign women are perfect and that you are guaranteed marital bliss if you marry a foreign woman. Nor are we saying that ALL American woman are bad in relationships and marriage. Of course not. There are good and bad people in every culture wherever you go. We are simply discussing this matter in terms of generalities and not in absolutes. 



Marriage in US hits an all time historical low


Interesting enough, the only demographic that is bucking this trend of record low marriages in the US are marriages of American men to foreign woman which continues to set newrecordsevery year. In fact, it is doubling every 8-10 years!!




Your lack of dating success is not your fault. Its due to Location Location Location!!



Main lesson in all of this ?.. don?t let anyone tell you that your lack of success in the American dating scene is your fault or that YOU need to work on yourself. Generally speaking, the problem with a man?s lack of dating success in America is most often (not always of course) a result of the dating pool we have here in the US.. Both Dr? Laura Schlessinger and Jean Twenge are quoted many times over as saying that as a general rule, (not in all cases of course), that American woman tend to have impossible dating standards which makes them too finicky and choosy and hard to please. We live in a divorce prone culture that encourages divorce, with the research showing woman being the instigators of divorce 70% of the time (and not due to abuse reasons). With few exceptions, foreign woman are simply more genuine, down to earth, authentic, and easier to please, and will basically accept you for who you are as long as you are simply a ?good man?. It?s simply not that easy with American woman. One gentleman put it best when he said the following about foreign woman:


?We opt for Women Overseas because most women would accept you for who you are, not what you do. I have YET to be asked what I did for a job by any Foreign Women. If so, its hidden under "What are you doing?" or "Where are you right now?". I'd say I'm on work and that's as FAR AS IT WENT.??


You will find that foreign woman are excited about being with a man; they love men for who they are, especially American men, who (typically) are more romantic? than their own. This simple fact is what myself and most men who have travelled and dated abroad have discovered. The fact is, your dating environment matters more then anything else when it comes to success with women. PERIOD! If you lack success in finding what you are looking for, its because of your LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION!!! One comment I have heard said by many men who found a foreign wife is:


?Had I not gone online and found her, there is little doubt in my mind that I would still be single and lonely.?



I believe this statement is very true for many single American men in their mid 30?s on up. The dating dynamics for men of older age in America works against them in a big way. If you continue to do nothing, it?s likely that nothing will change. Our advice is to take action and dip your toes into the international dating waters and see what may happen. The odds are that you will be pleasantly surprised.




A personal note about my own transformational experience as a result of traveling and dating abroad


I wish to end this introduction by making a comparison that best describes the impact of discovering foreign woman and foreign cultures has had on me on a personal level. I?ll explain this comparison shortly but first let me say a few things. First of all, when seeing the family values and character of most foreign cultures, it really does become quite easy to understand why foreign woman turn out to be so genuine, authentic, mature, down to earth, natural, and psychologically well adjusted. My experience traveling abroad and dating foreign woman was nothing short of a spiritual type of awakening , a form of intellectual enlightenment for me.


As many of you may have already seen, our research section of this site is full of quotes and research from American experts who have shown us how souless and plastic American culture has become. Whether we wish to admit it or not,we are a miserable and depressed lot of people mostly focused on materialism and the buying of ?things? for happiness.? Of course many of you reading this will be shocked to hear of such an opinion and think I am just being negative. But the professionals and their research studies clearly state this as fact. (See our research section for proof!).


As Jean Twenge says ?A fish doesn?t know its in water?.? She says this in her book to describe the fact that most Americans don?t recognize that this has happened to our culture. 99% of us have never experienced cultures outside of America excpet for stupid touristy places like cancun. For example, the title of a book written by the well respected social psychologist Dr Meyers put it best when he titled? his book?..?A spiritual hunger in a land of plenty?.


He further states:


?Never has a culture experienced such physical comfort combined with such psychological misery. These are the best of times materially, but not the best of times for the human spirit.?


?He further states:


? ?Americans excel at making a living but often fail at making a life ?.



?In addition,? social psychologists John DeGraaf, David Wann, and Thomas Naylor, write in their book ?Affluenza? the following:


?Unfortunately, our industrial life is dominated by the materialistic spirit of production [affluenza], giving little attention to the development of the human body, the human mind, or the spirit of life? and they also state? The daily bombardment of advertising images leaves us forever dissatisfied with our own appearance and that of our real life partners. To be lovable and acceptable is to have the right image. Authenticity be dammed.?


This is spot on!! American culture lacks authenticy. We are a plastic society mostly focused on flash, image and material things. There is little substance to American life. 



And lastly they state:


?When mother Theresa came to the United States to receive an honorary degree, she said ?This is the poorest place I?ve ever been in my life,? recounts Robert Seiple, the former director of World Vision, a Christian charity organization. ?She wasn?t talking about economics?, he adds. ?She was talking about poverty of the soul?.?


So, getting back to the comparison I mentioned earlier, ?the comparison I speak of is with the movie ?Dances with Wolves?. Some may wonder how in the world can that movie relate to my experience of discovering foreign woman and foreign cultures? Well, the movie Dances with Wolves fits my scenario perfectly. It is? about a lieutenant in the US ARMY who chooses to accept a post located at the edge of civilization so he can see the unsettled West before it dissapears.? In doing so , he unexpectedly finds himself assimilating into the culture of the Sioux Indians who were at the time considered as inferior people. (This is not unlike today where Americans tend to view everything outside of our borders as inferior and less). As the story line goes, through this journey, he reaches a form of self actualization on a spiritual and soulful level that he never experienced before. It was after this transformation that the Natives renamed him ?Dances with Wolves? to reflect his new essence as a human being. Basically, the film portrays his character as going from a life of meaninglessness, hopelessness, emptiness, and despair to a new life of hope and self actualization. He was reborn. He became ?one? with life and nature. In the movie, Ten bears (the tribes spiritual shaymen) comments to Lieutenant Dunbar about his new path when he says, ?I was just thinking that of all the trails in this life, there are some that matter most. It is the trail of a true human being. I think you are on this trail, and it is good to see.?, I feel that what I discovered abroad with the way other cultures live their lives, so genuinely, with such strong family values, and with such a lack of artificialness, plasticness, and materialism to them, it has changed me in a similar way. It set me on soulful and spiritual path that I never could have experienced had I not escaped the shallow and souless Ameircan culture where one?s career and ?material things? are a measure of a man,..where the competitive vibe in this society is such that someone has to lose in order for someone to win. Whether we Americans like to admit this or not, it is true. The research section proves this with many expert quotes talking about this American ?competitive? vibe along with our worship of material things and our focus on ?consumerism? for happiness.???


A value of a person is not measured based on their economic function or their accumulated wealth (i.e. The ole keeping up with the Jones?.) I believe that other (non Western) cultures are far closer to being on this ?true path of a human being? than American culture ever will be. And to marry someone who has grown up all their life in a culture that is on this spiritually healthy path is a very good thing as this person is more mature, more emotionally balanced, and has a healthier disposition and solid foundation for building a successful relationship. Most Americans I know (even those who don?t ascribe to the message of this site) readily admit to the fact that foreigners have FAR better family values.   

Overseas, I saw how human beings are meant to live! Families are extremely close and will go to great lengths to sacrifice for each other. (Definitley not a trait of the Average American family, only some, most likely country folk). People abroad are refreshingly humble, grateful, and appreciative of whatever you do for them. Woman in America on the other hand tend to just ?expect? and ?demand? to be treated a certain way, which shows on their dating profiles when they say ?Must know how to treat a lady?. And foreigners are genuine and authentic, not shallow and plastic like here in the US. They seem to believe in ideas that are greater than the self (i.e. Marriage).?

The USCIS divorce rate statistic of 20% with international marriages vs 50-60% with American marriages supports this notion. As the top American experts are telling us, we Americans are becoming more and more of a shallow and souless people.


In her book, Social Psychologist Jean Twenge says the following statement about American culture:


?It (America) looks like an upside down bird?s nest: a hollow vessel with an empty interior and a rotting structure (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 277)?



Once again, back to my story. Later in the movie ?Dances with Wolves?, the main character John Dunabr writes a sentence in his diary that matches what I felt like when I was among foreigners of 3rd world countries. ?They were a people so eager to laugh, so devoted to family, so dedicated to each other. The only word that comes to mind is harmony.? ?In this regard, I recall while traveling to the poorest provinces of the Philipinnes, I saw people who had absolutely nothing materially, but their souls and spirit seemed to be in perfect harmony with life and those around them. They were so much more happier than most Americans I see today. They are content singing their karoake and having the simple things in life. But what they have that we Americans lack is true human connectedness. Having a cultural bond and connectedness with others around you (Im not just talking with friends and family, I mean feeling a general connection amongst the people in a culture), fills the soul with the nourishment that humans need to be happy and content in life. Dr Jean Twenge talks about this American tendency of isloation and lonliness due to the ferver in which we embrace individualism and going it alone in life.??


Jean Twenge clearly sees how unhappy and disgruntled most Americans tend to be. In her book she says:


?The individualist ethos of America also explains a lot of negative trends that we see around us every day. A trip to the grocery store, as just one example, often involves aggressive drivers, sullen clerks, and screaming children.?


?I found foreigners to be so close to one another and so well socially connected to their families, neighbors, and those around them. Overseas, absent is the vibe that? ?everyone is expected to mind their own business? type vibe that is so common in American culture today. In addition, there is no compeitive vibe where people are divided into winners and losers based on what you do for a living or what you own. In America, one is never truly accepted for the way they are. Instead one has to constantly prove their worth under never ending constant pressure which leads to fragmentation and disconnectedness. Americans used to be spiritual, soulful, and happy once upon a time long ago (Think of the 50?s and prior). Freindships used to be genuine and people found time to help each other. We once had community and people could rely on each other in time of need. Now, as our research section shows, and as Jean twenge states, this is no longer the case with Americans. In her book, Jean Twenge states:


?In the book ?Costs of Living?, Barry Schwartz describes a former student who said he thought twice about burdening friends with his life and his problems because he knew how consumed they were with their own, and what a sacrifice it would entail for them to spend the time required to listen to him and to help him out. I put a post it note on that page and wrote ?this is a very familiar story? . ?


The point being, in America,? friendships tend to be shallow, superficial and fleeting . People are lonely and depressed. All research studies out there show that America has the highest rate of mental illness and depression on earth. There is a epedemic of social disconnectedness in America. She states:


?Generation Me often lacks other basic human requirements: stable close relationships, and a sense of community. The United states has become a place where we have more but feel worse.? ?


She also states:


?Isolation and loneliness readily lead to anxiety and depression. A mountain of evidence links loneliness and being alone with negative mental health outcomes. I often feel that many of us are one breakup or one move away from depression - our roots are not deep enough, our support systems too shallow.??


?But in foreign cultures, you feel more accepted, whole and authentic.The genuine social environment allows you to relax and be yourself, without developing inferiority complexes or mental disorders. No one has to see a therapist. In fact, seeing a therapist is almost unheard in non Western societies.?


?Americans also score the highest in the world on narcissism tests. In American culture, money and materialism trumps all else, spiritualness and soulfulness be dammed. You really don?t realize how artifical and plastic American culture is until you spend time overseas interacting amongst peoples of other cultures. We think of ourselves as so advanced and better than everyone else in the world just because we have technolgy and money. Our media trains us to think this way. But as the research shows, it?s all a mass egotistical delusion. Jean Twenge said in her research,? ?Americans are #1 at thinking they are #1?.? Americans have only succeeded at deluding themselves with their false and deluded superiority complex. And in the end, money and technology mean very little when it comes to matters of the soul, and having meaningfulness and happiness in life. As Mother Theresa said when she came to the US, we are the most poor people she had ever seen. She was stating that we have a poverty of the soul. And now the experts seem to agree with her. Our research section is full of sourced quotes from America?s most renouned leading experts who are telling us this. Maybe this is why woman from other cultures are so well grounded. One social psychologist , Dr De Leon, stated something that I feel explains this cultural human connectedness that American culture so lacks. He states:



?Filipino culture is based on the notion of kapwa, a Tagalog word that roughly translates into "shared being."In essence, it means that most Filipinos, deep down, do not believe that their own existence is separable from that of the people around them. Everything, from pain to a snack or a joke, is there to be shared. "The strongest social urge of the Filipino is to connect, to become one with people", says De Leon. As a result, he believes, there is much less loneliness among them.We talk about successful people our "developed" "first world" counties and almost exclusively in terms of education, wealth and employment position. But we know some who are educated wealthy and hold high positions are unhappy people. So can we really say education, wealth and position are the right tools to use to measure success? We all want to be happy. That is our main goal. You hear even the most successful people say, "All I want it so be happy."They feel that maybe more money will make them a happy person, a better job, another degree, another person, mate, friend, a higher position, one that brings more respect. But in recent years, scientists and philosophers tend to agree, happiness comes from within.? He also states another example as follows ?? ?In ?Bayanihan House,? a center for Filipino workers in Hong Kong, the writer chances upon a beauty pageant where one of the contestants was asked how she overcame homesickness, and why she thought the people back home considered her a hero. "She looked down into her audience of amahs. "We're heroes because we sacrifice for the ones we love. And homesickness is just a part of it. But we deal with it because we're together". The room erupted with applause and agreement. "Nowadays, bayanihan really means togetherness", says De Leon, and "togetherness is happiness.' It might sound too obvious, almost banal, to point out--had not so many people across the world forgotten it."When is a Filipino considered poor? What is the measure of personal wealth? Is wealth just in mind, in the bank, in landholdings, or elsewhere?? ?


In America, Ive also seen a tendency of adult children demanding or expecting their parents to buy them things such as a car or house. While there is nothing wrong if the parents choose to do so, the problem lies with the entitlement attitude of the adult children in demanding or expecting that their parents do so. This is the problem with the spoiled attitudes in American culture of today. We demand and expect things just like spoiled children, when we should be patient, gracious, and grateful. Ive heard it said by foreigners that Americans often behave like spoiled adult children. Who can blame them?

?But overseas, its just the opposite attitude!! The foreign girls want to buy their parents a car or house!! Or they want to help pay for their siblings education. Its classic selflesness. The self centeredness and narcissism with many woman in America (to be fair, some men too, though Jean twenge says they found that the increase in America?s narcissism was found mostly with American woman and to a lesser extent in men) is not a pretty sight to behold. But you wont know this difference until you experience it yourself by spending time in other cultures.


So, you may be asking how all this relates to our message. Well, it all ties together to explain why foreign woman in general are much more mature, well grounded, and? make for far better relationship partners which leads to more healthy relationships (hence only a 20% divorce rate as we have spoken of throughout this article).?

The best video clip I have ever seen that describes how foreign woman tend to be more mature and well grounded compared to the average American woman who is dysfunctional and carries lots of emotional baggage is listed here in this link here





The feminine, pure yearning for romance is dead.The object of the game for Western women today is to ?enjoy their independence?. This is incompatible with what provokes a man to treat women romantically and commit to them.


Looking for a wife is a game of numbers and opportunities; it?s just like fishing. Now, the river of the feminist-indoctrinated countries has a high percentage of fish that are poisonous to you, but the river of the traditional countries is largely stocked with healthy and delicious fish. Which river will you choose to fish in?




Myth: An Asian Woman wants to escape the poverty and will do anything to leave their country.

People who think this, of course have never visited an Asian woman at home. Family is very strong so an she will only leave home if she is truly in love. But she wants what any woman wants - a happy relationship with a man with whom she can share her love. With women out-numbering men by as much as four to one in many parts of Asia, this can be very difficult.

Myth: Your Lady Will Leave You Once She Has Her Citizenship.
Because divorce is illegal in many Asian Countries women are not pre-programmed to think of divorce as a way out. To her, family is everything and they will not give it up without giving their all. Inter-racial love affairs, which begin long distance have proved to be much more successful than domestic love affairs. The overall divorce rate in the United States is over 50%, while that for Asian/Western marriages is below 20%.

?Myth: Only a Man With Problems Are Attracted To Asian Women
Wrong again. Many men are tired of the 'emotional baggage' many Western women carry after around thirty years of age. Many men are attracted to the beauty of an Asian woman. Many men are simply attracted by the fact that age and looks are largely irrelevant to an Asian woman. In fact you will find that most Asian women really do want a considerably older partner. The fact that far more inter-racial marriages are successful than internal marriages speaks for itself.

Myth: Most Men Only Want an Asian Woman Because They Are More Submissive.
Another myth put about by people who have zero knowledge of the Asian personality. Asian women are tolerant, loyal and easy to get along with. This is, to the uneducated, confused with submission. If anything, an Asian woman is much better at getting what she wants than many Western women, they are just more subtle and tactful about it.

*Truth be told -? An Asian Woman knows how to make her man happy even while she gets her own way.



On the Russian side of this submissive myth (

There?s a famous Russian saying that says that the Man may be the head of the family but his wife is the neck that turns the head into the direction it wants!

Russian women are very strong, resourceful and streetwise. The amazing thing is that they are all of this without being loud or obnoxious as is prevalent in the US.

If they were submissive then they wouldn?t be able to survive in this tough environment. For example they are often dealing with drunk, aggressive and sometimes dangerous Russian men who want to harass or have sex with them. Behavior that would get a man locked up in no time flat in the United States is openly tolerated here and Russian Women are left to fend for themselves. Quite frankly there is great irony here since most American women (who believe themselves to be more independent or stronger then Russian women) would not last long in this environment.



Miscellaneous posts and stories I found on this subject matter


??If more Western men knew how much better they could have it , there'd be none left in the West . The women here are sexy , appreciate their men , and are just as intelligent and ambitious as their Western counterparts . Buddy , if you like the modern "strong , independent" Western woman , by all means , have at it . They're all yours .


One post I found that by far is the best I ever saw regarding our message is as follows:


Numbers do not lie- have a look at statistics across the country and you will see that overall, young men outnumber young women by somewhere around 11:10. In some places it is 12:10 or more. Add to this the fact that Hollywood brainwashes young women that they deserve rich and handsome young husbands with big cars and great careers and houses, and the fact that 20% of sexy hunks with money and good looks get 80% of the women, and you have a recipe for a disaster for a simple young man who just wants a date. He can't get one because numbers and statistics are not in his favor. Social and demographic trends are not in his favor. The Puritanical culture of not talking to strangers is not in his favor. In other words, he is behind the eight ball when it comes to dating.


The solution to the problem is simple- the surplus men many of whom are not in the most desirable category from the American woman's point of view, should go to places on Earth where there is a shortage of men and a surplus of women and where young women outnumber young men.

Try it and you will see what I mean. Go to two cities- Moscow and Manila. You will see more young women on the streets than young men. Always. And guess what else you will see- women try to look better, they behave in a sweeter manner, they try and be nice to guys because if they are not nice, another woman will whisk the guy away from her- guys are in demand.


You will see than instead of steely, supercilious looks that you get from women in the US, or, no looks at all, your appearance as a man on the streets of Moscow or Manila will attract curious, friendly and warm expression of interest from young ladies all over. They will be asking you questions, flirting with you, and saying yes to a dinner invitation.


So, why are they so nice? Because good men are hard to find there. The men can get a girlfriend any time they want, and at any age. They do not need to exercise, take classes in social skills, dress well or join clubs. And they are the ones who do the choosing.Men walk proud and tall there, they do not sing whiny, sweet songs to women, women sing those to men and about men. It is a man's world out there and a man's market.

In their country, there is an army of SEVERAL MILLION LONELY BACHELORETTES who cannot find a good boyfriend.



Below is another personal compelling story that I can attest is pretty accurate of what most men will experience if they go to the Philippines:


?After I arrived at the hotel where I was to stay, immediately I met a girl, a floor manager and she seemed to be interested in me. We talked and I plucked up my courage and asked her on a date- Guess what the answer was? "Yes!!! When can we go?"Wow! Just like that! I was not used to it. None of this- "I am busy, I have an appointment/headache" stuff you hear in the US. I went out with her and we went to the movies , then, a few days later, the beach and then we started swimming under the full moon and kissing- that was a total blast- just like a dream...

Then, the next day I left early to avoid her as I really did not want to get hooked on the first girl I met and just stepped out of the hotel and started walking. The streets were full of young college girls- all in really cute uniforms and every girl was cuter than the next. Some were looking at me. Then one girl blew me a kiss. I heard "Wow! Handsome" coming from some...Incredible!

And as I sat down, one young guy told me: "Hey, you are new here, watch out! ". I asked him why I should watch out. He said: "Because we are gonna marry you to a Filipina." I grunted something and off we went. I went to the beach and then on the way back, these college girls just flooded into the jeepney. One really cute creature just like one of those dream Hawaiian girls from the movie Blue Hawaii just plopped right next to me smiling. The driver said: "You like her? Ask her out!" I was blushing. But since this was not the US, I plucked up my courage and said Do you want to go to the movies? The answer was a nod and a smile. We went to the movies . It is always " Yes" with those girls. Later after the movies, she took me to her house and introduced me to her family.

This was just the beginning. Later I got on another jeepney and it was full of girls, too. One girl stared at me and asked me: "You got a wife?" I said "No". She pointed at her friends: "Well, choose one!" And they all roared with laughter. The thing was the girls were all so cute and fresh-looking and appearing very happy. They were friendly. Modest, coquettish, feminine yet aggressive. Real girls.

The floor manager at the hotel met me again and we went out again but I told her " Baby, baby don't get hooked on me..." and just asked that we'd be just friends. Then the second girl called me and said these words: "Hello, my name is Inday, we met in the jeepney. I told all the girls in college about you and they all want to meet you."
Yup! They ALL want to meet me.

I went to a department store and again it was chuck full of little miss Universes- sales girls. I approached a counter and they crowded me.
" You are so cute. Your face is so cute". Then on another occasion I was paying for some stuff that I bought and the cashiers started whispering something. I though something was wrong. The answer was: "Very handsome"." Who, me?" "Yes, you". "What is so handsome about me?" "I don't know, maybe it is your tantalizing eyes". And they started laughing.

I could go on and on and on. I would sit down and relax and girls would pass by and whisper to each other pointing me out. The word I learned was "gwapo"- handsome. Once I was just crossing the road. Four young ladies linked their hands and would not let me through. Sales girls from stalls would call out- "Hello, Darling!"

After a few days, I noticed something different about me when I looked in the mirror. My eyes were no longer sad as they used to be. I was smiling for real.
Because this was the way a man should be treated. Appreciated. Desired. Women should seek him out and not the other way around. Rejections and maltreatment by women in the US or anywhere else where cruel women live harm the man from within. Rob him of his dignity. Slowly eat away at his self-respect and the sense of self-worth. Make him ill on his inside. He may not show it but permanent scars would form on his inside. My time in the Philippines was like some magic ointmet for those scars. They were finally gone!

A place like that was not planet Earth the way I knew it. At least it should not be planet Earth. It was a Shangri-lah.

At night, my nightlife would start. I would go to bars and karaoke establishments and there would be girls everywhere and not many guys. The girls would crowd me. They were so gorgeous I was out of breath.

In the US, if you go to a night club, you always see more guys than girls and the guys look glum and pissed off. The girls look like they are princesses even if butt ugly. Here it was different. The guys looked friendly and non-threatening. Most were just relaxing. No competition. Enough girls for everyone to go around.

That's living!. No amount of job satisfaction or professional achievement can bring you close to the sense of fullfilment that such experiences can bring.

In 1998 I took $14,000 I saved up and went to the Philippines just to live. It lasted me six months. You can rent a hotel there for $200 a month. I had even more hell of a time. I was 38 now but nothing changed. The girls were still looking at me everywhere I went. I dated and dated. It just dont stop....


I invite all guys who are fed up with being lonely to experience what I have experienced. The Philippines is 5-6 times cheaper than the US. It is easy to get there and tickets are cheap. It will make all those wounds heal like magic.

And if you are not handsome in the US, by being a Westerner you are automatically handsome in the Philippines. And if you are in your 40ies, 50ies and 60ies, no problem again. You can get a girl in her 20ies-30ies. And a guy in his 30ies can find an 18 year old just like that! If you do not look like the Hunchback of Notredame or the Elephant Man, you should be good to go...

And if the society in the US says that the problem is *you*, then try changing societies. You may be in for a big surprise



A story from


?I learned on this trip how easy it is for even an average guy to date many good-looking, sweet girls at the same time. Men have so much power in the Lower Tiers, you can date a different girl every night. Not a day passed that I did not spend time with a nice, sexy young woman. But sometimes that power can get out of hand. A couple of times some of the girls I dated met some of my other girlfriends and they branded me as a player! Then, some of the girls stop talking to me.But others liked me so much they forgave me. Really, they have no choice; in the Lower Tiers it?s the women who have the 4 handicaps to deal with, not the men! There are times when I date just one girl because I like her so much, but the women in these lands still know that the power is in my hands. It?s a totally different feeling than I experience in New Jersey, where the women have you by the balls.?


Here is another:


?Some, actually many who marry these Filipina beauties, swear they make the best wives in the world, not only beautiful, but loyal, loving and faithful past death. From living here so long that has been my experience too. And, don't worry if you are older or overweight, like half the population of the western world. Both women and men here have the highest respect for age and weight is a plus to some here. It is a status symbol. If you are overweight, you virtually lose twenty percent of your weight when you step on Philippine soil. Age is respected. Consider yourself lucky to not be a kid anymore.?


Here is a real email I recieved from a friend who is obvioulsy quite passionate about this issue (LOL):


Hello Steve:

I have a profile on http://filipinacupid and you would not believe what I have experienced since getting a platinum membership.

These women are humble, and many times apologetic. I asked one if she was a virgin and she said no. Then she said, "I am so sorry I am not. Maybe I am not for you." After that, I replied, "there is no need to apologize. I am flexible and don't judge women based on that solely."

Another woman emailed me and she was 39 years old. She said how sorry she was for not being as young as most women are that date guys my age. She was very humble. I replied that I didn't judge by age, only by personality and the ability to make a man feel good.

Steve, these women are light years ahead of our American woman who make most men feel lowly and shitty. I am totally done with American women, permanently!


And another post:


?It was a shock, but it did not hit me until in my late 20's that foreign women, first and foremost, carried themselves like a LADY, they were also helpful, generally more honest, more considerate and cooperative, and did not challenge me or get in my face like a undisciplined western woman would..?



A u tube post I found:


?Dammitt man you hit the nail on the head. I remember when I lived in Austin I saw an Indian women walk with her husband down to their car and hand him his lunch and give him a kiss before he went to work and I thought WOW how strange?



A post at Happier


My best friends dad said one time there are a 100 million women in this country and you can't tell me there aren't any good women here. I agree but most of them are taken and the percentage of good women I would reckon is very low.

Also, in my opinion, an American female from the age of 18 to 35 just do not possess a traditional marriage mindset. The values that should be taught to these girls from a young age have been completely abandoned. It's evident in the way they act. I see it!! I hear the way they talk. I see the way they act. Look how these girls and women carry themselves anymore. Tattoos/tramp stamps on their lower backs and other parts of their body. Piercings in their lips, tongue, and upper eyelids. Dressing like hookers and going to stores in their pajamas and slippers. Different color hair. I see all this crap in public places and it makes me SICK!!!! This seems to be the norm these days with American females. Not all are like this, of course, but I'm sure most of you know all this crap I just mentioned is evident and very widespread.


It's just this artificial culture we live in and the lack of a values being taught to them that have made American women into very immature, backwards, and mentally unstable beings.

So why should I be optimistic about finding a woman of quality with a traditional mindset? So people say you can't generalize. How would you feel if someone made a generalization about American men? You have to get to know the person first before judging. Well, the way many of these women carry themselves zaps all romantic intentions. Once in a blue moon I'll see a chick that catches my eye and I think she might be worth getting to know, BUT as we already know no signs of interests are shown. They act closed off and don't acknowledge that you're trying to flirt. So I leave them alone.


However, I would still give an American chick a chance provided she has some class and carries herself like a feminine woman. But that seems to be scarce. I'm always on the outlook for a quality woman.



Insight as to why many men will not search abroad for love and marriage


Internet Forum posts on this subject:


?They will not go for a variety of reasons: skepticism, the arrogant belief that American women are the best the world has to offer, fear of the unknown, lack of funds, inability to travel alone, brainwashed by feminists that FW are greencard seeking golddiggers, and the list goes on and on.?

?The bottom line is WEAKNESS prevents most men from venturing out of the US to find good women. The men who do travel are hunters who exhibit the qualities that serve men well universally.?


?Americans are scared of the outside world. Main stream media. The media pounds this theme into them 24x 7. They think the rest of the world is a 3rd World Shithole and that you will be shot for your wallet before you make it to your hotel room.?


? I think men are also programmed into believing this consumerist culture is 'the ideal' of the world. They ignorantly feel they are in the best place right where they are, despite the fact that any marriage they walk into here has a 50%-60% chance of ending in divorce. You may as well play russian roulette, you actually would have better odds.?

?I also think a lot of men DON'T KNOW. I am a well travelled person, but until the recomendation of my best friend, then discovering this site and others, I never even thought about it as a viable option. People get so stuck in trying to run the broken down treadmill of the mating scene here they don't realize they could have it better abroad. Instead, they fall off the treadmill, then get right back on it, over and over again.....the average mangina thinks its NOT A PROBLEM WITH WOMEN IN GENERAL, BUT THE INDIVIDUAL. "She just wasn't the right one." How many times do you have to tell yourself that? I think the first step in turning a mangina into a man, one who would want to look abroad, is that he needs to realize THERE IS A PROBLEM WITH THE WOMEN OF THIS COUNTRY AND THE WEST COLLECTIVELY, NOT INDIVIDUALLY.?


?I think the main reason for this is simply because of lack of knowledge.?

?The idea that women could be sweet, warm, nurturing and kind by nature is so completely outside the reality of the average man in the Anglosphere, you might as well be telling him that the Easter Bunny or Santa Claus really exists. ?

?I read some stats about how in the US, most people don't even have their passports let alone traveled outside the US. To see is to believe, you can tell someone until you're blue in the face but if they could see it, then they would believe it.?

?And thus the saying goes, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink.?


?People are so ignorant and fearful that they would rather die before taking the smallest risk. They spend so many money on houses, cars, and crap. They are all so indebted into their ears that is ridiculous. Yet they couldnt spend a few dollars on a life changing experiment. They are too lazy to do anything and rather continue rotting away into nothingness.?


?American men and women are morphing into one singular sex but now they dispise each other. In the eyes of American women, there aren't enough rich guys to go around and since they won't SETTLE for anything else, they remain dateless and miserable. Most American men have become comfortably numb and they can't shake their "pro American" stances enough to experiment with foreign women. So, it's become one big CLUSTERF*CK.?



What?s wrong with the American male of today?

A Real Woman Wants A Real Man

Men are PC'ed to death. The consequences of almost 50 years of ardent feminism have been devastating: a society in bewilderment about gender roles, the rise of a class of ball-busting bitches whose battle cry is, "We don't need men," trumped-up charges of "date rape" and "sexual harassment," angry women blaming men for all their problems -- in short, an overall erosion of male confidence.

As society becomes more and more feminized, as more and more young men are being raised by single mothers who don't have a clue about the male sex drive, but who teach their sons to surrender their natural masculinity and pander to women, today's man is forced to apologize for -- and feel shame about -- his inherent male sexuality.

pleasing women

This abrogation of sexual confidence has resulted in a world full of wusses and doormats, men who cater to women and willingly hand over all their male power in exchange for a few crumbs of approval or sexual "favors."

The modern man walks around on eggshells, afraid of saying the "wrong thing," scared of showing his natural sexual interest to a woman, scared of being scorned, humiliated, or even fired -- scared of his own true self.

All of this flies in the face of nature. For years now, men have been forced to bend over backwards to please women, but pandering to a self-serving social movement can't really reverse five billion years of human evolution.

Clearly this essential point is lost on the female gender because women just don't have a clue what it is to be truly sexual -- a woman's sex drive can't even begin to compare with a man's. Yet modern feminism still blindly strives to feminize men into submissive she-males.

And the truth is, despite what women say and how much they protest, they want a man who acts like a man. Scratch the surface and you'll find that deep down they don't really want a man to act like a woman any more than a guy wants a chick to be masculine.

So instead of letting women snip pruning shears at their crotches, it's time for men to stop apologizing for being male, to celebrate their inherently sexual natures, and to reclaim their sexual confidence.

Find out what sexually confident guys are like

sexual what?

Just what is sexual confidence? First, it's important to understand what it's not.

Men who are not sexually confident:

? Seek approval from women

? Cater or pander to women

? Call women every day or worse, many times a day (clingy, needy)

? Try to buy their time and attention with meals, gifts, etc.

? Are nervous, insecure or overly nice around women

? Act like women's friends instead of their lovers

? Are available at the drop of a hat

? Tolerate without protest rude behavior, cancelled dates, etc.

? Go out of their way to please women in the hope of getting laid

? Let women control the relationship

? Are afraid that if they do "something wrong," she'll leave

? Grovel, beg, or are desperate for sex

? Obsess about and over-analyze everything women say and do

? Feel shameful or guilty about their natural sexuality

? Let women manipulate them or treat them like "walking wallets"

? Are lousy lovers

get sexual

The direct opposite of all these is sexual confidence. To get an insight into what sexual confidence is, just watch any "bad boy" in action -- one of those obnoxious, selfish, abusive jerks that women swear they hate, yet flock to like ants discovering a candy factory.

Why are women attracted to these guys? Because females think with their emotions, not with logic -- and Bad Boys are sexually exciting .

And just what determines sexual confidence? Sexually confident men:

? Don't make excuses for who they are -- they exude sexuality and they're comfortable with their natural masculinity

? Aren't afraid of being who they are

? Have no interest in being PC, morphing their true selves to gain female approval, or being overly nice

? Don't have to trade money or gifts for sex (a.k.a. "dating")

? Always control the relationship

? Never tolerate any female BS

? Radiate sexually-charged body language

? Flirt easily and well

? Are natural leaders, not followers

? Unabashedly look at women's bodies

? Don't care if they score with a particular woman, because they know that there are many others waiting in line. They want sex, but they don't need it -- they aren't?

???? desperate and groveling for it

? Never apologize for who they are

? Act like men around women, not wusses.

In other words, sexually confident men aren't afraid to be themselves or to exert their natural sexuality -- and don't really care what society thinks of them. Unlike bad boys, sexually confident men are not abusive toward women -- in fact, they love the company of women and treat them very well. And women can't keep their hands off them.

be a man

The good news is, a man doesn't have to be built like Arnold Schwarzenegger or look like Brad Pitt to be sexually confident and attract women. But he does have to tap into his natural masculinity and let it shine out for the female population to see.

When a man becomes confident and secure about his sexuality, he immediately asserts his independence and individuality. He becomes more selective. His self-image has been enhanced and he is comfortable being who he is instead of constantly changing his behavior to fit into society's current format.

Women can look into his eyes and read his body language and instantly know that he's a good lover. Instead of desperately seeking the approval of women and chasing after them like a puppy dog, he is now the "desired one," and women pursue him because he has transformed himself from a doormat into a challenge.

As the old saying goes, "Do what you've always done and you'll keep getting what you've always gotten." If you want to be sexually confident, all you have to do is be the man nature intended you to be.

Matthew Fitzgerald is the author of Sex-Ploytation. He has appeared on radio shows from coast-to-coast in the United States and in Canada, and has been featured on the Montel show and The Other Half.



What?s wrong with America


Money and ?THINGS? as our one true God

America is in decline. Anyone with a brain realizes this. What's amazing is all the numbskulls who still think "America is the greatest country in the world." It may have been a great country once, but since the early 90s, the country has really gone down the toilet.


Too many Americans today are generally superficial and materialistic and all they care about is their image, money and fame. Who do I need to impress today? Do I have the latest iPhone, do I have the coolest shoes, do I have the best page on MySpace? Americans are obsessed with celebrities and celebrity life. Americans' happiness is either material belongings or having money. You can't buy happiness and your car shouldn't make you happy.


In America you are constantly told you arn?t good enough or you will never be happy? unless you own ?Things?. No other culture rivals American culture in this shallowness and emptiness of the SOUL and spirit. Social psychologist Jean Twenge says this about America

?It (America) looks like an upside down bird?s nest: a hollow vessel with an empty interior and a rotting structure? (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 277)


See this NEWS Article about this very issue

Source -

??You know, the air is really ?thin? in the United States, because the value-system is one-dimensional. It?s basically about economic and technological expansion, not much else; the ?else? exists at the margins, if it exists at all. I first discovered this when I traveled around Europe in my mid-20s. I saw that the citizens of those countries talked about lots of things, not just about material success. Money is of course important to the citizens of other countries, Mexico included, but it?s not necessarily the center of their lives.

Here?s what the US lacks, which I believe Mexico has: community, friendship, appreciation of beauty, craftsmanship as opposed to obsessive technology, and?despite what you read in the American newspapers?huge graciousness; a large, beating heart. I never found very much of those things in the US; certainly, I never found much heart. American cities and suburbs have to be the most soulless places in the world. In a word, America has its priorities upside down, and after decades of living there, I was simply tired of being a stranger in a strange land. In A General Theory of Love, Thomas Lewis and his colleagues conclude that happiness is achieved only by those who manage to escape the American value-system. Well, the easiest way to escape from that value-system, is to escape from America.?


Bill Maher NAILS it! -----?


Photo Above : Today?s American Culture



America?s sick message to our children and adults that you are uncool unless you own expensive ?things?


More Proof of a empty and shallow America





Only in America is Narcissism celebrated and placed high on the cultural pedestal



A sign of a culture starting to slide downhill - you have the lowest common denominator held high on the cultural pedestal


????????????????????????????????????????? America ? the land of fat egos?


You won?t see this degree of douche bagness (oops, I mean narcissism) in other parts of the world.

As this photo clearly shows, it?s not only the American woman who can be shallow, materialistic, and

Narcissistic. It can sometimes be the men too. This is the type of crowds you typically encounter in the

nightclubs of America. You rarely, if ever, see these types in night clubs or bars of Non Western cultures.?



??????????????????????????? Douche bags of America - meet  your god!


Douce bags/bad boys like this is what many American woman flock to

?????????????????????????????? (Though most will try to deny it!)


This is one of the main reasons I consider a significant percentage of? American woman

??????????????????????????????????????? ???to be so dysfunctional


??????????? Truth be told, foreign woman would kick a guy like this to the curb!! It goes to

??????? show how healthy and balanced foreign woman are just by the choices they make.

????????????????? Very few foreign woman would be attracted to these type of guys



For PROOF of this dysfunctional trend of American woman preferring ?bad boys? (aka: jerks) , See this video below



Great observation about American culture


Social interaction, even among people who know each other is very bad here in America. Americans don't have any genuine comradery or solidary with each other regardless of all the idiotic flag waving. I believe it starts at an early age when children are left in the care of strangers (i.e, daycare, grade school) by their callous overachieving parents which then forces isolation on children.

For example, it's so bad now, I know of young women who drop their new born BABIES off at the daycare center because they have to be at work all day, where as, back in the old days it took a woman months to recover from having a baby and she took that time to bond with the child.

So as a result, you have children who don't develop any strong bonds with anybody (not even each other really) and they grow up into adults who are indifferent, cold, and some who are ruthlessly competitive towards each other.

These same people also grow into hyper-materialistic consumers because they have learned that consuming things is a way to artificially make yourself feel better and make up for what they're not getting from American society via REAL relationships. These are the kind of people who brag that they don't need anybody because they have all the money to supposedly make up for being alone.




Oprah Winfrey talks to Tom Shadyac about his new movie ?I AM? due out in theatres Feb 2012



Note -? BELOW, I have hi lighted in red the specific parts of this article that backs up and supports everything we have been saying on this site about what?s wrong America and American culture. The underlines parts back up what our ?research section?? has revealed. In black are my own comments.?


?This famous hollywood producer?s research reveals that American culture is ?Competitve?? rather than cooperative like most other cultures (such as Latin America, Asia, Europe). American culture measures success by artificial measures such as wealth and job status, this creates a competitive atmosphere where a society divdes its members into winners and losers. This individualistic competitive environment has made the USA the world leader in mental illness.?


?Several years ago, Tom Shadyac seemed to have it all: a multimillion-dollar career directing Hollywood blockbusters like Bruce Almighty and The Nutty Professor, a 17,000-square-foot mansion, fancy cars, the luxury of flying in private jets, invitations to extravagant parties and more. It was a life many people dream about.

Despite these many luxuries, Tom says something just didn't feel right.

"I was standing in the house that my culture had taught me was a measure of the good life," Tom recalls in his documentary I Am. "I was struck with one very clear, very strange feeling: I was no happier."Tom says that part of what's wrong with our world?and the lie that he says he was living?is our culture's definition of success.

"[We have] a very extrinsic model of success," he explains. "You have to have a certain job status, a certain amount of wealth. ... I think true success is intrinsic. ... It's love. It's kindness. It's community."
(Go visit any latin american or asian village or town, you see this cooperative nature in action. The people are so much more happier, more authentic, genuine,? and mentally well adjusted compared to Americans who are indivudualistic and competitive to the point of dividing it?s societal members into winners and losers which creates the highest rate of depression, stress, and mental illness in the entire world!!!)?

As Tom journeyed on his quest to find out what would truly make him happy and help unearth what's wrong with our world, he made major changes to his lifestyle. Today, Tom lives in a modest mobile home, bikes to work and flies commercial airlines?and he says he's never been happier.
(This is why foreigners from cooperative cultures are far more happier than americans are. For example, Nigeria, one of the poorest nations on Earth ranks at the top of most happiness surveys! And these foreigners who grew up in these cooperative mindset cultures tend to make for more stable and more psychologically well balanced relationship partners)


To find out why the world is the way it is, Tom explored the readings of scientists, philosophers, poets and others, and spoke with thought leaders, including Archbishop Desmond Tutu, scientist Dean Radin, researcher Rollin McCraty of the HeartMath Institute, journalist Lynn McTaggart, professor Dacher Keltner of U.C. Berkeley, author Thom Hartmann and more. 

What he discovered revolves around three key concepts that are explored in I Am:
1. It is scientifically proven that the entire human race is connected.
2. It is human nature to be cooperative rather than competitive.
3. If you don't do what your heart wants you to do and follow your passion, it will destroy you.


In I Am, Tom says, "There's one fundamental law that all of nature obeys that mankind breaks every day. Now, this is a law that's evolved over billions of years, and the law is this: Nothing in nature takes more than it needs."

In our culture, however, humans often take more than they need by buying large homes, driving expensive cars and living excessively, as Tom says he did.

(Our ?research section? documents numerous social psychologists who say that when people focus their efforts on gaining material wealth and possessions,? they become unhappy and depressed)

"We have a term for something in the body when it takes more than its share," Tom says in the documentary. "We call it cancer."

Tom says he didn't want to be a part of that cancer?he wanted to be a part of the healing. "We must lose this cancerous idea that we have to take everything we can," he says.

In a culture that takes more than it needs and gets caught up in the quest for wealth and power, Oprah says that one of the ways we've gotten so off course is the obsession with celebrity.

Tom: Celebrity should be celebrated. We should celebrate you and others for your talent. For your gift. ... [However,] when we put people on a pedestal, [we get] in the way of our authentic selves.
(When you travel abroad and REALLY get to know the other cultures around the world, you discover that Americans are actually some of the least authentic people in the world. Rather, many of us tend to superficial and plastic but we don?t realize it!)


Oprah: Aren't we the feeder system? Everybody who's watching it? We're the feeder system. You can see how it reflects us, and we reflect it.

Tom: The audience?you guys have all the power. You see, you have to stop elevating us. I don't want to be your hero. I want to be your brother. You know, I want to be your family member. I want to be your equal. And if you start seeing things as they are, like as the divine sees it...who will celebrate the women who swept this floor as much as any artist because she is an artist too. We're all artists. If you guys start doing that, it will change.


A big revelation in I Am is that our culture is wrongly built around the idea of competition. Tom says in the film, "That's pretty much the message that I got as a kid: 'Separate yourself from the pack.' 'Be number one.' And 'Win." (Once again, we see more evidence that are claim about American culture being a ?competitive? rather than a ?cooperative? one is supported. See our research section where social psychologists such as Jean Twenge say that American culture is a ?competitive? culture that divides its citizens into winners and losers. In other words, someone must lose in order for someone to win. This is extremely unhealthy and leads to a sick society. America has the highest rate of mental illness in the entire world.)

Though our culture may be built around competition, I Am strives to answer the question of whether it's competition or cooperation that is the essential nature of humans.

If you talk to people in aboriginal or indigenous cultures, you find the highest societal values is cooperation. And competition is a very low value. And competition beyond certain boundaries is considered mental illness," says author Thom Hartmann in I Am. "You look at our culture, and cooperation is considered a relatively low value. And competition is considered the highest value. We celebrate the most powerful competitors."

But is competition the true essence of human nature? Thom says that scientists decided to test this hypothesis and found that it is not.

"What [scientists] found was that democracy was being played out literally every day by ... animals," Thom says. He recalls his own experiences of going scuba diving and seeing schools of fish dart around as a collective group, and also remembers watching flocks of birds in his backyard fly together and change directions suddenly while still remaining together.
(This is why foreign cultures have little to no mental illness and are far healthier, and produce far healthier and well balanced marriage partners!!)

"How did they know?" Thom asks. "Well, it turns out, when you do the slow-motion photography, they're all voting literally with every wing beat or with every gill beat. They're voting hundreds of times a minute. And [the scientists] said, 'We found this from insects all the way up to primates.' The basis of nature is cooperation and democracy. It's in our DNA."


Another one of the important concepts in I Am is one that Oprah has said for years: If you don't do what your heart wants you to do and follow your passion, it will destroy you.

"People find happiness in direct proportion to doing what they love," she says. "If you don't do what you love, you die a little every day."

 Following one's heart may require him or her to make changes in life, and the way people change, Tom says, is to ask questions. The main question he wants people to ask themselves is this: Who are you? Not what your culture has told you to be, but who are you on the inside?
(This is what my exposure to foreign cultures, especially the Philippines culture, has taught me! Seeing how other cultures live, how close they are to each other, how connected they are, how supportive of each other they are, ?..It set me free!! I now could care less about what American society tells me what I should do or what it thinks of me!! (i.e you?re a loser if you live at home or if don?t have a certain job or make a certain amount of money, drive a certain car? etc) . I now could care less about whether I can get a date with an attractive American woman who is more than likely dysfunctional, materialistic, and plastic to begin with.? I now realize, especially when it came to my difficulty in finding or landing an attractive American woman, that its America that is sick and dysfunctional, not me. Guys, set yourself free by exposing your spirit and soul to the healthy vibe of non western foreign cultures (i.e. latin America, asia, russia).Feel what it feels like to be amongst healthy ?inclusive? societies where there is no artificial measure of a person based on status and wealth.??????

"I think many of us are living inauthentic lives," he says. "Authenticity means to be the author of your own life. I think many of us are telling stories that have been given to us rather than our own story."
(Amen to that! American culture and Americans generally lack authenticy and genuiness. Many if not most of us have been trained and taught by our culture to be artificial, shallow, and superficial. Think Im nuts for saying that? Well don?t believe me, believe the experts!! Jean Twenge and many other experts agree!(See our research section for proof) They all say that we are a culture driven by flash rather than substance. Image trumps authenticay. Jean Twenge says ?A corrosion of close relationships and a substitution of fantasy for reality ? paint a bleak image of the world. It (America) looks like an upside down bird?s nest: a hollow vessel with an empty interior and a rotting structure (The Narcissism Epidemic, pg 277)?




Quote by Winston WU of happier abroad addressing the skeptics


?The narcissism of American women, unrealistic entitlement standards, lack of commitment, princess attitude, not needing men, not liking nice men, mistreating men, hating and despising men, being too picky, being paranoid of strangers, etc. etc. are all real and objectively proven. They are not mere opinions in the minds of frustrated men. They are well documented and proven, as you can see in Steve's Research Report.

What I'm saying is that, the problem is not all in the minds of the dateless frustrated men in America. The problem in American women is very real, provable, and factual.


After all, in other countries, there are no movements of dateless guys who can't find a decent woman. That logically says that the problem is in America, not in a group of frustrated guys.?




Don?t accept the American Bill of sale for relationships


The dating imbalances in America are so severe, and the degree to which I've seen so many women mistreat men is completely unacceptable (i.e. act snobby,mean, and disrespectful to men when they try to approach them in the singles scene such as clubs and bars). This is so much so that? I decided enough was enough, and I became a fervent and passionate supporter in the cause of EDUCATING men so they can realize that there is an army of millions of gorgeous Bachelorettes who would love to be with them and who would APPRECIATE them. In the US, there are many men who are really getting a raw deal out there in the dating scene. And to think of the incredible options that American men are missing out on due to a simple lack of knowledge and fear of the unknown just completely boggles the mind.


One of my favorite yet so DIRECT testimonials I have seen out there goes as follows:

?Many men in USA believe they aren?t good with women but the fact is that they are trying to succeed in an arena where there is no success. I?m not saying they are bad people. I have many desirable fun american women friends whom I like as friends, but when it comes to relationships, they are so lame.?


And Another excellent real life post:

?When I first began this journey, I did not take into account how much it would change me fundamentally on my beliefs and philosophy on western culture. I made the tremendous realization that I did not have to put up with the women in Canada, just so I can get a sniff of pussy. With this came liberation. I would stay in these countries for an average of 8 weeks at a time. With each return trip back to Canada, it became increasingly difficult to return to my own reality. How could I ever date, never mind marry a woman from this country, when the quality was so much better in these foreign countries? To voice these opinions openly is to risk ridicule, not only from the women in our society, but from the castrated males also (aka:manginas). I do not have one friend that I can say is happily married. All of them say they are, but actions betray their words. It is a lonely path, but the reward at the end is the ability to look in the mirror and know that you have chosen the life you wanted to lead. Not how society thinks you should live it. For whatever age you have came to this realization, you had the courage to go against the grain and now you are going towards a brighter future. It is better late than never. ?




? Brothas, expand your horizons- you don't have to settle!! There are women elsewhere that will literally blow your mind, but you will never know unless you book that plane ticket!!Once you go abroad it?s obvious. ?




?Go to South America, you will be up to your ears in hot young aggressive foreign Latina girls that will be fighting over you like as if you were a billionaire.?




?when you finally make it out of america you will LOVE IT. you will NEVER go american again. promise !!!.?




?Visiting Latin America gave my travel buddies something they never had before: a point of reference that opened their eyes! As they returned to New Jersey, they realized just how different the local gals treated them in comparison to the Latin American girls. Sick and tired of the Upper Tier feminist baggage, it?s no wonder some now live part-time or permanently?or are planning to retire?in Latin America.?




?Chris told a dating expert about his great success in Latin America. The ?expert? replied, "If you are really good, you don?t need to go anywhere!? But what Chris knows now is that in Santa Cruz Bogota, Quito, Rio, Managua, Havana, and Buenos Aires, it?s the women who have to be very good, not the men!?




?I coach men on how to join the Global Dating Revolution? especially guys who are coming off a bad divorce, experiencing long periods of being single, or are simply sick and tired of the local upper tier dating scene. As the saying goes, it?s the sick that need the cure, not the healthy. I know! I was once sick myself, and now I?m completely cured. And now I want to help other men, enjoy the same success I have achieved by joining me in the Global Dating Revolution.? (



So guys, in conclusion, please educate yourself. Read the research section of this site and judge for yourself the credibility of the experts and researchers of whom I quote. Feel free to message me and let me know what you think of it. Also, come participate in our Online Community? forum and tell us if any of these things presented here ring true with your own experiences with dating local vs abroad. And for the guys who decide to actually dip their toes into international dating waters, please come back and share your experiences at the happier abroad Forum so that others may learn and benefit and be inspired by? your story.



Thank you for taking the time to read this and for allowing me to share why I am so passionate and inspired by the message at Happier Abroad.



God Bless and good luck!




Steve Neese

Research Specialist and Promoter of Happier Abroad



My Links:

My Research Section on Leading Experts and Studies Who Back Our Claims

My Dating Profiles Comparison: American vs. Foreign Women

My Happier Abroad Profile

My Interview with Steve Hoca

My Interview with Mark Davis

My Interview on A Foreign Affair Video Show

My Website: Global Dating Solution



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