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HAPPIER
ABROAD Why
You Can Have A Better Life
and Love Beyond
Approachable Faces of Foreign Women
(Visual Proof)
"I blamed myself for my lack of success
with
American women. So, I worked hard for many years to improve myself...
and I was
still getting rejected by women who had no business being picky!... So
then I
did some traveling to
Nowadays, US women
project a
very strong anti-stranger, unapproachable force field/bubble
around them
that says, "Don't mess with me. I'm unapproachable. I
don't
talk to strangers. If I don't know you, you have no business
talking to
me unless you are lost and need directions. (Unless of course, you are
or look
like Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt.)"
In the
This "force field"
or “bubble” I describe emanates from the attitude,
separatist ego and mentality
of young American women, and is definitely real. I can more than
attest
to it, for I have felt its presence strongly and experienced it
thousands of
times I've approached and talked to American women. And in fact,
it’s the
first thing I notice at the airport whenever I return to the
For example, try
walking in a
public place or mall where scores of attractive women hang out
at. When
you say hi to them, most don’t even acknowledge your
existence. Those
that do will only smile back half-heartedly before moving on to mind
their own
business. And if you try to make conversation with them, they get
defensive and quickly withdraw away. (Incidentally, I’ve
challenged those
who claim that American women are approachable to do this, but they all
failed
and chickened out. They were just all talk.) The ones that
work
there will give you a professional “Hi how can I help you?”
of course, but
that’s their job.
US women are not
comfortable
meeting people, and if they have to do so, then they humor them with
fake
contrived greetings. They prefer to ignore your existence if they
don’t
know you and you’re not in their clique. The only folks who
try to deny
it are the politically correct, narrow-minded, reality deniers and
feminists
who hate men. Anti-social people themselves also notice nothing
wrong
(since anti-social people consider other anti-social people to be
normal).
Besides me, many
others have
felt it as well. For instance:
“The
invisible wall you described does exist. I felt it many times. With me,
when I
used to go out more, I would usually just be looking for some
intelligent
conversation. Sex sometime too. I find woman, yes even American woman,
to be
alot more interesting than American men. But approaching a woman with
that
"F*** You" look on her face, I 'm sure you know the one I'm talking
about, is hard. So I wait for them to approach me. It has happened,
just not as
much as I like.”
And this person put
it
vehemently:
“I
recently found your website and agree with everything you have
said.
American women are the most spoiled, unfriendly, unapproachable and
anti-social
women in the world! I live in the
This French speaking student
lamented his surprise at how unapproachable American females are:
https://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=7285
“Hello folks sorry my accent I
primarily speak French (24 y guy )... I am a
finance student and I have
been studying here since 2006. I just want to say hello and join the club and make a short
comment
concerning the
And undoubtedly,
the US media’s
propensity to make people live in fear is a factor too, as this reader
explains:
“American culture is
in reality dictated by the media. If you look
at other cultures, let's say Canadian and Dutch, their media doesn't
feed fear
into the minds of their residents. Americans are deep down scared of
too many
things. The movie "Bowling for Columbine" was very accurate.”
On the other hand,
in the
rest of the world, women are flattered and sweet when you approach
them,
whether they are interested or not, whether they are available or
not.
For example, women in
In many foreign
countries,
when you approach or chat up girls, they don’t get offended or
see it as
creepish, but are often flattered and see it as sweet, giggling or
blushing
in the process (how many American women nowadays blush or
giggle?). It’s
a total refreshing contrast. That’s how “real
women” are, and it’s truly
feminine. Thus you feel more confident and relaxed about meeting
women,
since it’s far more natural to do so. Basically, a guy is
more allowed to
be himself abroad, rather than suppress who he is.
And it's not
because they all
want your money either (although there are always a portion of bad
apples,
scammers, and hustlers that you can run into). For a list of
reasons why,
see the chapter entitled “Aren’t
foreign women just after your money and a green card?” (https://www.happierabroad.com/ebook/Page74.htm)
Getting dates
outside the
In
“Mojno s vami poznakomitsa? - usually does
it! Very
direct and simple!!! dont have to "game" chicks in
When picking up chicks in
Later on, he
reiterated:
“Right
on Winston. I met this Super from
zdravstvuite, mojno s vami poznakomitsa! is all you need!!.... cause
thats how
simple life should be, a man wants to meet a woman, and there is
NOTHING wrong
about it...
:)”
My pickup line in
Russian
though, is “Moznah vstretumsen?” for “Can we
meet?”
In
But with American
women, you
have to play games, be indirect, and often not even that works.
For
example, see this example of how complicated dating advice is in
http://www.digihitch.com/ftopicp-31831.html#31831
“Seeker, Tips:
* A non-straight answer means the girl isn't interested.
* Don't listen to your friends: NEVER tell a girl you want to get
involved with
"I like you" "I'm interested in you" or anything like that.
That's for -after- the relationship is established. If you say this
before she
likes you, she will get the "ICK" factor, and you have LOST your
chances with her. If she -already- likes you, these may work, but then
again,
she'll get involved with you no matter what you say if she already
likes you.
Along the same line is "Would you like to go out with me sometime?"
NEVER ask this, or make reference to "going out with you" under any
circumstances!
* Be VERY skeptical of advice that women give you about what women
want. They
mean well, they even believe what they say. But they are wrong.
Following a
woman's advice when you are pursuing another women WILL make you lose
your
chance. Try an experiment. Ask for love advice from one of your female
friends
about "another female friend you like." Use that love advice on the
same friend. See how quickly both chances of love AND friendship vanish
into
thin air!”
This forum poster
put the
dysfunctional crazy dating scene in
http://brown.dailyjolt.com/forum/read.html?id=531250&PHPSESSID=4f69c4a88e49c6294892aa0fc84ee6ca
“That's
because American girls are really psychologically fucked in the head.
If
you approach an American girl and are nice to her, you are a
"stalker" or a "loser." In addition, Asian guys can't get
white girls because they're viewed as subhuman by most white girls.
Asian girls
drool over white guys. What is an Asian guy to do?
As
a general rule, for an American girl, if you treat her like shit,
demean and
ignore her, she loves it and can't get enough. She will become totally
self-destructively obsessed with pleasing you and will eventually lose
herself
in the drama that you have to create for her to actually be interested
in you.
This is unhealthy, but it's the only way to really get laid here.
In
other countries the more intuitive phenomenon of "If I am nice to you,
you
will be nice to me" actually applies. So you don't have to go against
your
morals in order to hook up with a girl or keep a girlfriend.
My
two cents!”
Even good looking
attractive
guys have the same complaint, as this one admitted (I know he’s
good looking
cause I’ve seen his picture by the way):
“Thanks, but I have many of the same complaints as you do, seriously. You have to play games with girls in the states and they are spoiled and bratty and controlling and manipulative and have double-standards...they are mostly bitches in a word.”
As one
reader observed, why bother with all that when
in
“…….
I agree with you that it is a shame that a guy has to go to all that
trouble
exploiting the intricacies of social dynamics to get an attractive
girl's
attention and interest. From what I've read, European girls seem
to have
less hang-ups than American girls, and don't need to be approached
indirectly. I would love to skip all that and get to building
attraction
rather than breaking her "forcefield" or what I like to call
"bitch-shield". The saying, "Work smarter, not harder
comes to mind". Why work so much harder to achieve the same
result,
when you can have a much easier and enjoyable time with women in
This
reader below cites the easibility and fluidity of
meeting women in
“I flew to
I go to a French language school and take
a
class....I make 20 new friends overnight....I meet my future wife...I
get
married and now 2yrs later...im STILL HAPPY!
I dont want to bunch all American girls
into one big
lump....BUT -- the majority of them due to culture or something act
really
snotty and stupid - like were not GOOD ENOUGH for them....and to be
honest and
not toot my horn - i was voted Prom King in highschool...so Id hope to
think
that Im not THAT ugly at least...but i swear i went 12yrs in the bay
area - and
rarely found a girl who even batted an eye....and quite frankly i
started to
lower my own standards lower and lower....and for what? The
moment i
traveled anywhere else - i found girls that would SINK any
american girl
that ignored me...now i have a wife that turns heads left and right -
but she
is staring right into my eyes with love.
Real love!
I think
Some hear
about such things from their friends:
(though you won’t hear about it in any public media outside the
internet)
https://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=3991
“Dating in
They say a
picture is worth a thousand words, so let
me show you some real life visual examples from out in the field that
typify
how girls in non-US environments react to men who are “chatting
them up”.
(something vilified by American women). It’s the next best
thing to being
abroad in person. These are images of girls I chatted up in
public
without having any prior acquaintance. Some are photos and others
are
digital stills from my video footage. Notice the attitude on
their
faces. There is a natural openness and relaxful look of
approachability
without any fear, paranoia or uptightness. As you can see,
meeting girls
that you don’t know for the first time in many foreign
environments is very
natural and part of the flow, not creepish, out on a limb and against
the flow
like in the
First,
some images from Russia/Europe.
As you saw
in those images from their eyes, gaze, and
expression, they have a relaxed, enthusiastic, curious look about them,
even
though I’m a total stranger. And there is an openness to
them that is
very rare in the modern US.
Did you
notice how unspoiled and modest they look in
their gaze, not just toward me, but in their general aura?
They had no pretentious ego shell like
Note: Many of my encounters with the
girls above can be seen
on video in my Foreign Female Encounters video series at https://www.happierabroad.com/film.php
Now for
examples from
You see
how unlike in the
For many
more examples, see my Foreign
Female Encounters Videos,
which are the closest thing to firsthand: https://www.happierabroad.com/film.php
Now,
contrast that with these photos of typical young
American girls. Notice how superficial their smile, eyes and
facial
expressions are. There is more of an artificial-ness to them
compared to
the foreign girls above.
Below, notice the tough badass looks on the
hot
American blonde and brunette that basically says, “We don’t
need men and we are
too good for everyone”. Now how feminine is that? Who
needs that?!
See the
difference? Even friendly girls in the
You might
ask why there is such a big
difference. I can only speculate and surmise that the
individualistic
values of our nation that create a sense of separateness in the self,
coupled
with the modern feminist culture that overempowers women to lose their
femininity and become independent, has caused some type of imbalance
that has
changed their human nature. These two factors could very likely
produce a
strong but false sense of self and ego, an illusion that American women
overprotect in unnatural ways, such as by emanating this anti-stranger,
unapproachable force field, among other things.
When one
discovers that the anxiety-provoking force
field of unapproachable American women is absent in foreign women and
experiences it firsthand, it can have curative effects, as conveyed in
this
account:
https://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=1898
“I was very nervous around women, I
found it nearly
impossible to engage a woman in a conversation. I was convinced that
was the
reason I couldn't get dates. I was angry at myself for not being able
to
overcome this, but trying harder only made it worse. I spent a lot of
time
thinking about it and went to a doctor and was prescribed anti-anxiety
medications but they didn't really help.
This problem came to an unexpected halt
when I traveled
to
When I'm in a country like
When I'm overseas, I don't subconsciously
feel like
I'm doing something wrong by flirting with a woman.
What it boils down to, is that foreign
women are an
entirely different species than western women. If I had been told 2
years ago
that my love shyness/social anxiety with women could be solved simply
by
changing the type of women that I was pursuing, I probably wouldn't
have
believed it. It's one of those things you have to experience to fully
understand.”
Such
striking differences make me wonder why more
people in the
“Oh, yes, in the
One factor
for the "unapproachable force
field" that I feel around American women might be due to an
incompatibility between our soul densities, since not every guy agrees
that
American women are unapproachable (but then again some guys are afraid
to admit
the truth or are blind to it or too politically correct to acknowledge
such
things, and plus some guys don’t believe in approaching women
anyway). It
could be that our soul energy or consciousness vibrates at a different
frequency and so our presence around each other feels awkward and
approaching
them feels wrong and unnatural. Conversely, this would also
explain why I
tend to find women in
If
you’re stuck in the
But in the
meantime, I hope my visual proof of
approachable faces gallery above has inspired you and awakened you to
the
refreshing difference of the dating world beyond
What guys don't
understand about the fear of approaching women
What many
guys, especially the ones involved in
the PUA (Pick Up Artist) movement, don't understand about the fear of
approaching women is that the reason they are afraid is not because
they lack
guts. It's because they can sense that the girls they want to meet do
NOT want
to be approached, so that to do so would be rude and violating. They
subconsciously sense the "do not approach me" shield around them.
You see,
everyone has body language and vibes.
We can all sense them, even if we deny that vibes exist as a form of
energy.
There is a big difference between a girl who is approachable vs. one
who is
not. But this difference can only be described in words to a certain
point. It
is mostly felt and sensed by one's natural instincts. You simply "just
know", even without observative physical signs or evidence. Even
left-brained guys who deny that vibes and auras exist as a form of
actual
energy can instinctually sense others' vibes, despite their denial.
To try to
put into words, an approachable girl
looks at ease, relaxed, open and friendly. It's in her face, body
language and
aura too. She makes eye contact with others, smiles back at people, and
has an
open body posture. An unapproachable girl, on the other hand, has a
closed
narrow vibe and look on her face. She is uptight, serious, focused,
does not
make eye contact with others, and has a "don't bother me" look on her
face. When you try to muster the courage to talk to her, you will feel
a cold
chill and an alarm will go off in you that says, "DO NOT! NOT ALLOWED!
INAPPROPRIATE!" It has nothing to do with guts or bravery at all. And
even
the top PUA gurus can do nothing about it, despite their bogus claims.
Guaranteed.
An adept
"people reader" can spot
these differences consciously, while others merely feel them
subconsciously.
Either way, one simply knows, even in the absence of physical signs.
So for
example, say I'm in the
Now this
is not my imagination. In Japanese
culture, people do not talk to strangers unless they are properly
introduced by
mutual friends, or it is for business-related purposes. It has nothing
to do
with you or whether they like you. It is merely a basic part of their
culture.
Almost everyone conforms to it. You can feel it in their "collective
vibes" even. If you try, you will sense an inner alarm that says "NOT
ALLOWED! FORBIDDEN! TOTALLY INAPPROPRIATE!" It would feel like you were
about to commit a cardinal sin and violation. You just know this.
In this
scenario, it won't matter if you are
the biggest daredevil in the world, or one of the top PUA gurus (e.g.
David
DeAngelo, Ross Jeffries, Mystery, etc.). It won't make a difference.
Despite
their bogus claims, if put to the test in this situation, the PUA gurus
will
undoubtedly fail. I can guarantee that.
If
something is inappropriate, you just know
it. You don't have to be told or given physical signs. And it's not
your
imagination either. You simply know, even if you are not good at
reading others.
What this
means is that American guys are not
really gutless, as the PUA movement claims. Not at all. They simply
live in a
culture where females are paranoid, not approachable, and don't like
talking to
strangers. To violate this is inappropriate, so most guys do not dare
try.
Yet
American pop culture maintains this myth
that girls are very open and friendly in
This
misconception is then capitalized on by
the PUA movement and their gurus, who have a vested financial interest
in
selling expensive seminars and courses to these "average frustrated
chumps
(AFC's)" as they put it, to help them overcome their fears, which
further
perpetuates this myth. But it ends up being just a bunch of pep talk
with
little or no result.
In
reality, it is extremely rare to change the
mind of a girl who doesn't want to meet you by using some kind of "PUA
technique", and even in such cases, the girl is likely to be mentally
unstable or erratic.
Anyone can
make bogus claims or brag. But to
prove them is another matter. And bogus claims usually fail
when put to the test. I've seen it time and time again. A lot of guys
who claim
they can pick up girls in places where they are not approachable, end
up
chickening out or making excuses when put to the actual test. Even if
it were
possible, it would happen occasionally, not on an everyday anytime
basis.
Of course,
your looks matter. Some girls only
want to be approached by guys that are "their type". These girls are
"conditionally approachable" and you can also recognize them by their
"don't approach me unless you're hot" vibe as well.
Now,
suppose you are a very good looking white
guy in
So the
lesson here is that approachability of
women depends on the situation, location, culture and type of woman.
It's not
about guts or technique. You simply have to utilize those factors to
your best advantage.
Now if you
are in a culture where it is not
appropriate to approach girls coldly, you can still meet them through
introductions, parties or other social events. Those would be the
socially
acceptable venues in that case. But at that point, you would have to
evaluate your
desirability and eligibility to the females there. You’d have to
gauge whether
you are seen by a reasonable percentage of females there as the type
they would
be willing to date.
Here is
why this matters:
Take the
example of a typical Asian male in
Now in the
earlier scenario of the good looking
white guy in
So you
see, your desirability and eligibility
is another important consideration you would have to factor in.
This will
matter even if you are in a culture
where the women are very approachable. For example, if the typical
Asian male
above goes to
So, even
in a super approachable culture like
There are
always exceptions of course, but
that’s how it generally is.
In any
case, it doesn't hurt to try to develop
your people reading skills, so you can size up people and situations
quickly and
accurately. If you are strongly left brained or practical, focus on
utilizing
the skills of your right brain so that you can function with whole
brain
holistic thinking. Being able to connect the dots and understand others
requires the abilities of your right brain, not just your left. So
don't
neglect it.
That is my
suggestion. Good luck!
Discuss
this article in this forum thread: https://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=7033
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