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Reader Responses to The Happier Abroad Ebook and Website
(Sorted in
ascending order, newest at the top)
Page 1 , Page 2
See Also:
Testimonials that Dating is all about Location!
Letters from Expats who are Happier Abroad
Hi
Winston.
Hope that you are keeping well. I was led to your website via HenryMakow.com,
as I'm a regular subscriber of his. I just want to say that I'm an attractive
mixed raced Englishwoman, who is in agreement with what you write about. I am
very much in my innate feminine energy, and I coach women to reclaim their
innate feminine energies.
I agree that American women have lost touch with their femininity, and that
some have realised that Women's Lib did a great disservice, not just to them,
but to men as well. Some British women have lost their way. HOwever, there is
good news on the horizon Winston. There is a growing anti-womens lib backlash
by feminine women like me. I myself love the way Frenchwomen are so in touch
with their feminine energies, and American women have a lot to learn from them!
My Australian friend, Renee has a wonderful blog called
www.thefemininewoman.com, which shows women how to be at one with their
feminine, sensual natures. I have a wonderful man who loves and appreciates my
femininity. So, all is not lost Winston. By the way, have you checked out
French, Italian, Spanish as they are also very feminine women, and those
countries have great architecture, culture and excellent cuisine? Those women
are also slim, elegant and stylish. Just to let you know, that there are
Western women on your side, and you know what Winston? I would like to see half
of the single male dating population 20% of the 45% single men, go abroad and
return to the USA with gorgeous, foreign brides. That would make American women
sit up, and come to terms with themselves and their bad behaviours. Take care
and carry on with your good work. Sharon
Hello Winston, I wanted to thank
you for posting your story. It was quite heart warming & bittersweet. Some
ten years, I'd come to a similar conclusion, regarding American women.
I'd watched my own sister grow from an ordinary loud mouth adolescent to
someone with full blown histrionic personality disorder. It's sad to have lost
her, as a friend, growing up. She's married today and her husband is the most
p*sswhipped, docile slave I'd ever seen. She also doubled in physical weight.
Before, she looked almost like a budding model but now, she's barely
recognizable. I'd hate to see her after menopause.
Anyways, as for me, my life changed when I'd stopped seeking women, who were
sociopathic and looking for someone to boss around. And yes, I'd been through
the tall tales about "Yankee" women being *spiritual*, into
Buddhistic or Shamanistic practices, socially enlightened ala Gertrude
Stein or Marie Curie, and all kinds of northeast USA
cultural claptrap phoniness of the pseudo-elite private colleges. In
retrospect, it's nauseating. And believe me, none of 'em published a book worth
reading. BTW, this is what's passed off as the creme de la creme of modern
American culture esp between cities like NYC, Boston, & DC.
I then traveled to Brazil, Singapore, Australia, Thailand,
Korea, & Japan, mostly for business, but also for vacations and
exploration. I haven't looked back. Many fellows thought I was paranoid about
American women but today, none of those fellows are saying it anymore since
half of them are divorced and constantly be threatened by lawsuits from their
ex-wives or ex-girlfriends. This is now an out-in-the-open but hushed secret
among American guys who have overseas projects.
When David Levy wrote that humans and robots will be dating in the future,
little did he realize that that America would be the love robot's greatest
market.
https://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=8764
Okay so i have read all the way
through the book happier abroad. and i have to say that was one good D*** read.
it was very very hard to find any flaws on the information on american society and american women in general
it is just super duper accurate i would have to say 98 % accurate. probably 100
%.
he hit the nail on the head about the women in america being unapproachable,
anti-social, unfriendly male hating bitches. for real.
How the american culture is a giant farm designed to hurd animals ( sheep
people ) and we are all just here to consume, go to work
have sex go to sleep and repeat the cycle.
he is like my mentor right now. foreign women it is just sooo much better to
meet them, they are easy-going, date them and have
sex too.....
i love seeing that rump roast jiggle while i ride that d*** thing.
continuing on...
it
the clubs are more livilier too over there in other countries too. just like he
said. if you go to youtube and watch
italians dancing in nightclubs
you will see what i mean. compare foreign nightclubs to america's.....
for instance...i only went twice to american nightclubs. The women there are
very mean and cold and take you for
your money to give them drinks. they leave you on the dance floor right there
in the middle of the song. and tell
you " i am done". they never socialize with me. they are all there to
tease guys with their body and say no to you when you approach
them just for pleasure. you will see groups of girls talking to each other and
rejecting every guy that comes up to them.
half the room is not dancing
or socializing with the opposite sex. its really sad. the guys can't do
anything. so i completely stopped
going. it is just a horrible experience there.
foreign nightclubs you will always see people dancing and EVERYONE IS
socializing or dancing with an opposite sex. its sooo much
more livilier. People actually go to meet new people. its easy to get new
friends and even dates there in these other countries
so all in all winston WAS RIGHT WITH EVERYTHING. THANK YOU SO MUCH WINSTON.
truly inspirational stuff.
Dear Winston Wu,
You sir are great, I came across your website and it hit the nail on the
forehead for me. I was in the Army for four years, and after I got out I
thought "Hey, maybe now my date life will improve". Yes, I have grown
up and grown alot-unfortunately where I grew up is still exactly the same as
how I left it (orange county, ca). Yes, there are some good people here, and
some of the girls are kind of nice. Yet, my date life is zero to non existant.
The funny thing is that I feel that I am a really social person, that I am
naturally charming and natural with most people. However, as you have written
dating in
my previous message, wasn't sufficient enough to describe
what I felt. Thanks for this book man, I will guard it with my life.
Thanks for your book man, I've read it and I'm
already just... so at awed, you speak of relationships, and the true failures
of American Society. Which has made me come to the conclusion that we need to
fight FOR America, I mean,
I'm definitely going to take your essays, and
books with me, I'm going to read it 5x so I have it memorized, you speak the
truth. You aren't afraid to tell it, I'm not, but I didn't know what the truth
was. You've shown me that truth, with that one article I read a month ago. It's
opened my eyes, sure The Zeitgeist Movement and The Venus Project describe how
people become themselves. Well, your article hits the next level, what is wrong
with society, and well you've provided many many solutions. Some you probably
haven't even thought of.
Well, I've come to the conclusion, that I need to
help "save"
SWORDLESS SAMURAIS!!!!!
Hi Winston,
I came across your site today and I have to agree
with all that you say.
I am a 26 yr old White South
African woman married to an American man. I have been in
I will give you my perspective as a non-western
woman.
The first thing I found was the jealousy and
competition among everybody. Every time I go out I get dirty, mean looks from
other women/girls - and my husband has noticed that.
Women are so jealous of each other - and the
jealousy is even among the men!
American women are very feminist. They are very
masculine and loud, and refer to me as a "girly-girl" instead of
seeing that a they should also be "girly-girls"
I get tired of being told that I need to
gain weight, when it is they who need to lose weight, but of course it is not
"ok" to say so - yet it is "ok" for them to critisize me
for being thin.
They are very anti-men and don't understand that men
and women have different roles.
I am amazed to find that women go out in their
pajamas! I won't even check my mail-box in my pajamas let alone go shopping in
them!
Americans constantly ask me silly questions such
as "So, if you are from
And "So do you have lions roaming around?"
"So - you have computers over there?"
They also seem to find it difficult to understand
any accent other than their own.
Before coming to
They have no concept of what goes on in the rest
of the world and nor do they have any interest.
They are very insecure people who think that if
they own enough it will somehow make them a success.
I did not expect
Thank you Winston, I am glad that you have
discovered how much better foreign women are, and I wish you all the happiness
in the world.
-Sarah-Jane
Hi, Winston,
thank you for your prompt reply; I don't know
where do you find time to do the site maintenance and the correspondence:-)
Yes, if you think it is best to put my observation/opinion on your Forum and on
the Website, that is OK. I wrote basically on an impulse, I never write to a
public space as am very private. But what got me in your site that it is very
deep; it looks at a problem of insanity (again, stated by those who are from
abroad, or Americans who tasted life/cultures abroad; Americans themselves are
in a delirious oblivion about themselves and their "culture") of
Americans, their life style and "culture" at every angle, in depth,
diagnosing the insanity, looking at the possible causes of it, and offering
suggestions to cure. It was by far the most comprehensive and cumulative work
I've ever encountered on the subject. Big thanks to you for that, for devoting
your life to this cancerous world's problem. At first I thought that emphasis
on dating is a bit shallow and might repel some thinking, deep people, but the
more I looked at it, I came to think that it might just do the opposite...tell
the guy/person who is love/sex/normalcy starved in this country, dying inside
and craving for life and love that he should go read some philosophy he'd send
you on a familiar route...however, if the same love/sex/normalcy starved
individual is told he should look at this site to find love, he'd go, but
later, he'll maybe look at philosophical, spiritual pages, and, hopefully, will
be on the road to enlightenment. So, it might actually work to attract more
readers who otherwise wouldn't bother to look. )
But the site on the whole is very profound. I
believe you should collage all the material and publish it, public just needs
to know all that.
I could write volumes on the subject of
II. About your adviser and just HOW (in his
opinion - is he a male?) Russian women (and rest of Slavic for that matter) are
HAPPY here...ooofff, what a British Encyclopedia we could just write. You know,
your site for for guys (as primary, level 1st target audience), and you speak form
guys' experiences...well, we could just say the same of American men, just the
same...we cannot find happiness with them...they are too shallow, ignorant,
controlling, empty, materialistic, and all within the lines. Slavic women
suffer in their relationship with American guys. I have Serbian, Polish,
Bulgarian (girl)friends, and it is like we all say just the same things, and
have same emotions in our American circumstances. To put it short, it is like
having this creature (in a female form), that is so alive, and spirited, and
lovely, and smart, and with common sense, and with good taste, culture,
education, etc., and here is her American guy...did you read J. Fowles
novel, the "Collector"? Well, if you did, that's the picture, nothing
more to add to this. It's a murder, slow, painful, and torturous murder, a
crucifixion of a creature in a Slavic human form. There were times when I
almost died from depression (I read thru
...attraction...all Slavic women are
beautiful...but...what to say...? you know, from my experience, the men who
looked at me, or payed attn to me here (in a "normal", European way),
are Europeans themselves!!!! American guys just don't see it! ( I have access
to European community here, and so, that is where I find normal men!)..they are
not Americans!! I maybe got attn 2 or 3 - not more, times from American
guys..agn, what do you define attention..? a glassy look? Or an intelligent
interest? well, glassy looks I got, and maybe desire to sleep, but those 2 or 3
American guys were again studying languages and so a bit more animated than
"normal" American guys. I am not really sure yet...it looks like
American guys/ppl are so dead inside they are incapable of discerning beauty,
because only spirit can do that. I stopped dressing well here, make-up,
etc....it takes so much effort and imagination, and they are not even able to
discern the beautiful things in front of their eyes...
I have few friends here, Russian, other Slavic. We
gather together sometime, for tea, pies, etc...every time inevitable the
conversation turns to "imbeciles" (our term for Americans)...we give
resolutions to stop it, to try to be happy, and it doesn;t work, because every
time you go out, to a job, to a grocery store, simply driving in traffic here
you here stressed and have to deal with imbeciles in every corner. So,
depression, depression, depression for Rus women. So, in terms of attention -
they are not capable to give real, intelligent, with good sense of humor and
sensitivity, attention. I stopped having anything to do with American guys,
period. I am going thru a divorce now, and my soon to be ex-husband is a cult
member also (Christian, conservative), and I suffered unimaginable shallow
mindedness, control, imbecility, and total, killing lack of spirit. The more
religious a person is, the less spiritual he is, that is it.
Let me see where I found a link for your site...let me
check my bookmarks...I believe it was this one: http://www.culturechange.org/cms/index.php no..?
I have to go now from work, and will write more
later on, thanks for reply, and again, for tremendous work on enlightening
crowds on the "American" issues. Tatiana
Hello!
I by chance (looking actually at a completely different
forum) encountered your site, and decided I simply HAVE to add my story/point
of view...have to say it is all within the lines of what I've read (how
immigrants view America/Americans...
I moved here 13 years ago, never planned, but that
man met me in my home city, and couldn't leave alone for 2 years, which
eventually ended up in marriage (me being very young, unaware of life, without
life's wisdom)...we first lived in Texas...boondocks. I ma from Russia, country
of soul, of mystics, of rich inner world, of great culture, literature,
etc....What striked me to the point of not possible to put in words
there: IGNORANCE (enough was said in your page there. same things, ppl not
knowing the map of the world, geography, their own culture not talking about
other cultures...back in Russia I did not even KNOW such things, this level of
ignorance, is possible in the world...
2. Fakeness...again, ppl are not real, all wear
masks, all pretend, a huge fake hypocritical, cold, indifferent, spiritless
world. I felt I was communicating with lunatics or imbeciles. In
Anyway, then arn 9 years ago we moved to
Coldness, indifference, hypocrisy, lack of
refinement, of culture, of common sense, of spirituality, of compassion are the
most horrible characteristics of this country and its ppl. I would agree also
to call it "insane asylum". This inner emptiness drives them to horde
malls on the weekends, to look for their "bargains" and
"specials", and to pass by others of their own kind that are in need.
I feel it is a Devil's place, a Devil's Kingdom on
Earth par excellence. This world sucks on the whole, but in other places
of this dark planet there is some soul lives on, some Spirit dwells in people's
hearts still, and that soothes the trials of our every day existence. Here, in
the
Thank you for creating and bringing to the world
your site, for the honesty and sincerity. Blessings
Dear Winston,
I have looked at your YouTube videos of your trips to
Sincerely,
Jose
Hello Winston:
Let me add to your list of things
that I feel of what ails Americans, and why so many of them are
in this sad, depressed state they are in.
I feel that
The list could go on and on
infintum. However, what I realize now is this: if people are sold bullshit
bills of goods, and things don't turn out like they're supposed to, then people
go into a sort of neurosis where they either shut down, get anxiety, or a
combination of the two. It's for this reason that there are all sorts of drugs
out there (expensive, legal ones by prescription of course) that are designed
to totally numb us and make us continue going along with this matrix. I have,
however, noticed that marijuana and other natural psychedelic drugs do
quite the opposite. It's for this reason that the governments of the world --
partictularly
Most prescription drugs keep those
people fed on high expectations from ever rebelling and hitting the
streets. These drugs anesthesize their pain enough to make them still want
to work, however, and continue life through this rigged matrix. However, if you
ask a person who is on, say, Prozac what they feel about corporate America, the dating scene, the social scene,
etc., they'll just say the same parroted crap that "life is what you make
it and you need to go the extra mile to earn a living in this world."
They'll also convince you that
Anyway, I now understand why it's
so so inportant that I go overseas and get out of this rigged matrix.
I am going to do everything in my power to make it happen this summer, or by
early fall.
Talk to you soon Winston, and keep
up the great work on your site.
Steve
hey Winston,
I looked on your Topics page at
AsianFanatics and alot or all of the things you said are rather true about
society in general. I've seen so many people say those things all the time
about "how to improve yourself" and "become more well
liked". It's true that alot of people are superficial and act fake.
Heck, it's all over AF, or at least by many of them. A few comments:
3) I don't believe in lowering my standards
either. I try to be realistic and going any lower isn't good enough. I just
wouldn't be happy enough. If someone was way
out of my standards ... how could I ever settle to marry the person or
even
stay with them for long??? Even short term
... I don't want to waste my time. If I'm gonna date someone ... I want
to
enjoy it. Some people are sort of
unrealistic and expect to find someone "perfect" and if you're
lucky enough ... great,
but until then, they shouldn't think about
it so much. When you find someone easy to like ... just go with the flow
Reality is, not everyone is rich, looks hot
or has it all. I don't even have an iPod, blackberry,
a car or an active cell phone right now
4) You're right. No one should have to wait
years just to find decent people. If so ... something must seriously be
wrong
with society, and whereever you've
been
5) Again I agree. If a person completely
stops trying ... it's possible to get no results. I'm not a flirty person but
if I
like a girl ... I at least notice her (not
that it means every girl I look at ... I'm attracted to. I could look at anyone.
It depends ...). I don't think it's that
people have to stop looking. It all depends where you are, when and around who.
6) That's a good point. No one is needy or
desperate to begin with, or at least shouldn't be. Most people didn't start as
an ace. Some people naturally had what
attracted their friends / gf from an early start while others learned more by
experience. There's no shame in learning from
experience. I think it's normal for everyone to
feel frustrated and go
through a negative phase if things haven't
worked out well after a while. The key is to learn from it, become and remain
confident and positive again
7) yeah, money alone isn't always the only
thing they want in a man
I'll be skeptical before I ever listen to
any PUA advice. "PUA elites" ... yawn.
Too many player wannabes around ...
and pick up lines are a joke. Seriously. Never tried 'em. Don't think I ever
will
The only way pick up lines could ever work
is if she's already attracted. Then she'll act on them even if she doesn't think
they're that good. Fact is ... if she likes
you, the pick up line doesn't really matter
yeah too many guys don't want to get in the friend zone. There are those it's okay ... and those you want
to stay out of
For a while now ... I've had some
interest in learning about other cultures and also want to travel sometime.
Since I
want to travel in the future I think it's
important to learn more about other cultures and languages, and also more about
women and dating overseas.
So a big thank you for making your website
and best of luck on promoting the movement
https://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=7740
This site
confirms what I realized about 20 years ago!
Well after reading
may posts here, I thought it was high time I joined and became a privileged
member of happier abroad!
I discovered this absolutely brilliant website by doing a predictive search
google search about "american women vs european women".
I have a similar story to Winston's with a few differences. Instead of moving
abroad to get girls, I started targeting the ever increasing foreign student
population here, with great success. I gave up on white women almost 14 years
ago when I had my last white girlfriend.
Winston I know exactly what you are talking about here. White Western girls are
simply awful! They are spoiled little brats with almost no sense of culture,
intelligence or kindness. My Dad was an Ambassador, so I was lucky enough to
live both In Canada and in
I've had two Japanese GF's and 1 Indian one in the last 4 years, and they were
all so much better than all my previous white western GF's put together! I started
out doing online dating here about 4 years ago but after about 3 months of head
games, idiots, losers, deadbeats and time wasters, I put a notice on a local
language exchange site for Japanese ESL students here and had a response within
30 minutes. 2 dates later I had a cute little Japanese GF. All I did was talk
to her in English for about 2 hours and bought here a hot chocolate and a
donut! No comparison to the local girls!
Now I only date non-anglo-bitches! No exceptions!
I've got lots more to tell but had a suggestion first. How about an official
Happier Abroad theme song? I nominate:
"Local Girls" by Graham Parker...listen to the chorus, very wise
words sung by an American Male giving great advice on what to do with American
Females
"don't bother with the local girls..."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L-9A2O6CwW4
Winston, you rock man! Ive always had trouble
expressing to my family and friends exactly the right words as to why I just
cant meet woman in the
I want to share the gospel with as many guys as
I can, as there are so many here who suffer. Dude, most american
woman suck ass. Like you said though, its not their fault. .
I fell in love with filipinas also. I knew
filipinas were what I was looking for on first trip. I too was like
"WOW" , Ive been to angeles city 6 times now. Ive had 3 filipina fiances, but I
had really unbelievable bad
luck, the first two backed out on me, but I think
its cause they were only 19 yrs old, they got scared at the last second.
Yea man, every guy freind I know good looking
and not so good looking have the same complaints as you and I about the way
woman are here in the states. And I agree, americans are a arrogant bunch,
and what makes many of them especially bad is that they are arrogant and ignorant
at the same time.
Seriously, it could have been me who wrote your
website, LOL. I see myself in your writings. Even though most woman in the
states find me attractive, I still get rude responses just trying to be
sociable.
Anyways, you're writings are gospel and so many
guys in the
Steve
Hi Winston. I really enjoyed reading your ebook. For years and years I would
beat myself up inside over the fact that trying to talk to women was a total nightmare.
I have had a series of relationships. However It can be very hard to
communicate with women out in there public places. And if you are not part
of the right clique or circle of friends you are in a bad way. Even if
your a reasonably attractive and highly intelligent male. After
reading your ebook. It gave me a very detailed account of why things are the
way they are. If things at the time is not going right connecting with women
it,s not my fault. It,s not that I,m doing anything incorrect or I don,t have a
certain look. #1 it is very taboo to talk to women you don,t know.
It totally goes against the social mores in US society even in places
where it,s suppose to be appropriate to flirt with women. I also watched videos
on true forced loneliness. That guy Bill122460 is a f__king joke. Allot
of what Bill talks about in his videos. Sounds very paranoid psychotic
among other things. Plus I don,t think that feminism is totally at
fault. The reason it,s very difficult to talk to women. Is because
most
https://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=7332
Hi! New member here, located in the
To make a long story longer, I was laid off
from my 6-figure IT job last fall and can't find a job to save my life. My wife
is pregnant with our first and we're seriously considering selling off the
house, cars, life and possessions we have here and heading backto
Thanks!
RedDog
http://happybachelor.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=abroad&action=display&thread=3328
Wow. Winston. Is it really you? Lol....if so WELCOME TO THE FORUM MAN.
I've got to say this right out: everything you wrote is absolutely dead
on, and furthermore, your site, happier abroad, which was linked up to
nomarriage.com was INSTRUMENTAL in my choice to not give up on women entirely,
but look overseas for women of quality. I've been on both sides of the fence
that you talk about here; having gone through long periods of rejection by
american women, followed by projecting the alpha bad boy image
(unintentionally) they seem to eat up and got 'picked' left and right. But I
can say this definitively: success and failure was all shit. People would
constantly tell me "oh you just haven't found the right girl!!" Ha.
Bullshit. Why is it every dumb bitch would take the alpha happy bachelor
version of me, transform me to the beta, then resent their creation like a
fucked up dr. frankenstein and then hop from one cock to the next? Over and
over again. Nearly every relationship I've had with these animals has ended in
infidelity on their part. After a 7 year meltdown in which the girl cheated on
me with a 20 year old drunk (she and I are 32 LOL) I knew I was done. I'd long
been a mysogynist and those dormant views came right back to the surface. This
helped when my best friend recommended me to nomarriage.com, MGTOW, and HAPPIER
ABROAD.
I was at a crossroads. I've been so damn happy as a bachelor I wasn't
sure I wanted to get involved with any women at all....but then my best friend
joined International Cupid when we were out of contact, met a brazillian
hottie...and is now getting married this summer. I thought fuck it. What have I
got to lose? Let's TRY. I'd always found asian women the most attractive in the
world, so I thought let's zero in on them and see what happens. I read your
site. I read your forum. I read testimonials of dudes who hooked up with hot
asian (and other) types of women, and had seen the light. I did more and more
research. Saw that AM to FW divorce rates are much lower. On and on.
After doing my homework I did Cupid too. And I'm happy as shit I did. I
met a fillipino english teacher living in
But I can attest Winston....everything you say above, and on your site
is damn true. Damn true. In 7 days I have never been so happy with a woman in
my entire life? Why? Because she is night and day unlike the shit here.
I've been telling my friends in real life that going foreign is
UPGRADING. UPGRADING. See, if you get picked by a bitch here...chances are on
the attractiveness scale, unless you are a serious alpha or moneybags....expect
a 4-7 at best. Further, they PICK, the stupid man just settles...because when
he is offered pussy, he just can't refuse...having no clue that he has better
options, that he can UPGRADE. Getting laid here by these animals is drinking a
slow acting poison. It's only a matter of time before your hormones will lead
to emotional and financial devastation.
Overseas women are radically different than the shit here. I can tell
this already. Hmm. See my forthcoming post on "The Trip".
But Winston, I cannot recomend your site enough. And the ebook. The
ebook was great. I even owe you a thank you, I'd say. What I read on there
helped me to decide: JUST GO. JUST DO IT. I'm 10,000 times happier because I
did. Thank you for your wisdom. Feel free to use anything I write on here or my
thread as a testimony.
I was about to give up on women entirely and just be a confirmed
bachelor like one of my heroes CS Lewis. But WHY? God, there are women of
quality out there. Quality. I HAVE one now. And I saw A LOT MORE. Go abroad, gentlemen,
you will indeed be happier...I know I am.
Thanks Winston.
Yo Winston,
I wrote a post some months ago to your forums that you appreciated. https://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?p=17842
I would love to meet you in person. You are a big inspiration and I'd
love to find our first hand how you interact socially in a foreign nation and
maybe learn a thing or two from you. Are you still in the
As of today, I have still not been outside the
A few questions:
My first counties to check out are
1) Can you share your thoughts on these countries?
I read good things about your "second tier" list.
Brazil, Argentina, Peru, Ukraine, Poland, Russia...
are there any other nations
you would add to this list? What about
There are two
other questions:
2) I do not
party and do not care for clubs, bars or alcohol at all and this is in fact one
of the leading reasons it is hard for me to connect with women in the US, where
social lubricant is practically a necessity. Do I need to do that to meet women
and friends easily in these so called second tier nations? Can you tell
me in which nations is this least necessary? I want to be able to meet
women easily right out in public, not have to go to bars and drink.
3) I speak only
English and beginner Spanish, but I think I want to relocate to
Thanks and you are the man,
P.S.: I have just recently had yet another incredibly dysfunctional
encounter with an American woman. She is very attractive and we have
hooked up sexually many times, but when I try to deepen the relationship and
tell her I like her and present the idea of being exclusive, she responds as if
I had just attacked her or as if I have presented some sort of absurd or
foreign idea that is incomprehensible to her. She said "Everybody
sees things through a different universe" (!?!?!?!)
It is completely insane, and I agree entirely with your assessment of American
relationships and American women - totally backwards and dysfunctional... it is
like they do not need or want men, they do not want sincerity or commitment, do
not nurture or care for their man or in any other way embrace a feminine role;
a man is expected to cater to and meet her every expectation and held to
account for every little way in which he fails at it, while she does not need
to do any of the same and he is never allowed to expect likewise of her; and
they seem to act like they want to be single forever - even when they meet a
nice guy.
Dear Winston,
I would like to ask you a question regarding the behavior of (certain) Americans.
I have found something peculiar about them which I cannot adequately explain.
When I was shopping for a road bike at a bicycle shop here in my city, an older
gentleman assisted me in looking for the right size and brand of bike. He
had helped me before when I had a mountain
bike that constantly broke down due to wear and tear. For
starters, he had that repressive, constipated look that a lot of American males
over the age of thirty develop.
Well, to make a long story short and to the point, I spent quite some time with
this older man, asking him questions about the specifications and so
forth. I then found the right bike that I had been looking for, and
purchased it that day.
When I had walked into the same shop a few days later, he acted like he had
never seen me before, and he had that same cold, stone-faced look. Maybe
he was a veteran of a previous
I've experienced this with many other Americans before, who are superficially
kind and nice when meeting them, but a few days later they act like they have
never seen or met the individual before. They mutate from kind and decent
to cold and arrogant in a heartbeat.
What is your best explanation for this strange phenomenon? Or am I just
being too sensitive? Yet, I hear complaints like this from other
immigrants, usually those who have just moved to the country. I've become
so self-conscious regarding this problem, hence I'm afraid to form any
friendships with them, because as you know, they are not the kind of people who
cherish close friendships either.
Sincerely,
Alex
P.S. I am a Russian immigrant myself.
Hi,
first of all, I agree with you in all what you said and published on the internet
about American girls.
I am international student in the
at least say hi to a girl in this country!
Man, American women suck!!!
and they are not that beautiful! russian and european girls are wayyy hotter and more beautiful!
my question is what do you recommend for me? should I travel abroad to date a gril or should I just sign in one of these Russian dating website? even most of these websites are reliable!
thank you again for what you accomplished so far and keep up please.
https://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=6965
Hello and Thank
You Winston!
I recently
stumbled across your website while doing some research for my upcoming trip to
On to lighter matters...I have quit my job, saved money for travel, cut my
ties, and I'm getting the fuck out, at least for awhile 
Right now I'm just going to
Winston, You are the type of person that sees/feels something wrong and does
something about it. Respect!
ip
Hi!
I just read your story in "about me". I really enjoyed
it! I'm a young woman from
What you wrote is mostly what I thought American guys must feel... As
soon as I acclimated and learned the language (when I moved i went to middle
school), I started seeing the tremendous differences between
At first, the only people nice to me were black girls. And in
Anyway, i don't wanna get into the details too much, I'm not sure if you will
get this email.
My point i that i felt that most people here were "under a fog" with
a few heads sticking out. Those that stuck out were really different,
more intelligent, open minded... it's hard to describe, but they seemed more
"russian" or whatever. More present.
So i definitely felt what you are describing, but the other way around (i came
from a country of openness and connections to this country). so
anyway, thank you for describing your experiences in such intimate details, not
everyone could've done that.
In russia/ukraine, men
and women are treated by their actions, thoughts, how interesting
they are, if they are good at parties, etc... not just looks and
stigma. Women want guys like you, guys who really want a
relationship and treat their girlfriends/wives with love and attention (unlike
many russian men, spoiled by attractive women all around, many are cold and
distant as husbands, and expect their wives to slave away in the
kitchen). You appreciate beauty and what you've got. that's what
men are supposed to be like. always wanting their wife, happy to walk
around with her.. etc.
although i have some feminist tendencies (probably a rebellion to how I was
brought up, my beautiful mom working at work , with children and in the kitchen,
and my dad only working and expecting mom to take care of
everything).
but I do agree with your view of "that's how women should be".
Even by nature, they are supposed to need men, be vulnerable... it's great to
be strong in many fields of life.. but in the man-woman relationship the man
should be the strong one.
Anyway, write me back if you want to chat, I have to go back to work.
thanks again, your website was very informative, open and true to life.
bye,
Ludmila
First, hello.
How are you? My name is (Anoymous) and
I'm 26 years old. And I can COMPLETELY understand
what you at one point in your life went through, as I was
reading you general Loneliness through the years overly long
essay (which, by the way, takes a talented writer to
elaborate on, as well as balls to admit to). I've also
seen your YouTube page, and as someone who has been
interested in International Dating in the years to come with
an agency because I honestly don't like my land that
much anymore, I was very moved by your story.
There is so much that I want to agree with and to
elaborate on as I sit here on my new laptop (a fine acer
with a 17.5" screen) that I got as a pre-27th birthday
gift a few days before my January the 28th b-day. I'm
also incredibly lonely, but I am doing things to remedy
this and I promise you within the next year and a half I
shall turn it all around; just you watch planet Earth. ;-)
I must agree that from the look of the overrated
models, actresses and adult film stars in the English
language, Anglophonic world (such as here in the U.S., most
of Canada and Australia & New Zealand), I feel we are
often trapped because of the predominant bloodline of most
of our women, and mostly being of Scottish descent (which
Celtic is a lot
like Anglo despite what anyone says) and
traveling to my ancestors homeland of the
of '07, I can see why we're so messed up as a
collective whole here in
don't hope that offends anyone.
My parents have always been in the motel
management business, and as a result, I've moved all
over the
honestly never liked where I came from. And indeed, the
women are absolute shit. Only people who've never
traveled like it here, for the most part. I've been
depressed on & off with some self-esteem issues most of
my life. And it's fine, and nothin' at all I can't
fix as of now, and thankfully have been fixing. Recently as
of two months ago, as a life long French culture lover (as
well as Russian culture), I was in
didn't like all the foods to be quite honest (ha, I am
afraid I am
somewhat more attracted to more North American
store bought foods and of course, our cultural
imperialism--but what are ya gonna do?), but I also
didn't wanna leave. For a little over 80% of the time,
mainland European women were SO gorgeous, and if you as an
English speaker actually made an
?attempt to speak the language, then
there is no telling
?how many women you can meet.
?
?That plus, I'm also in agreeance: Sadly,
the
?here IS a rather bland and
dullard & boring place to
?live. I've been a big movie
lover my whole life, and I
?LOVE collecting films, and playing some
video games about
?twice a month as well. But our North
?American "culture" (yeah,
I know...) is in
?such of people spending hours on
pointless "social
?networking sites" (which is
increasingly odd--after
?hour, your not REALLY socially
interacting with anyone in
?the same room, now are you?) and with
technology
?running-away with itself and with others
overall acting even
?more anti-social then me, that over all,
I feel we've
?already failed as a country. And I'm
extremely sorry if
?it sounds mean, but I agree: I gave up
being happy to live in
?this country of shitheads and morons an
incredibly LONG time
?ago.
?
?Frankly, it's so overall boring and
lifeless here,
?that I'm surprised there are any return
visitors at all.
?And might this Caucasian also add that
I'm sorry that
?you've had social persuasion during your
life. It's
?odd that since your family settled in
the West Coast that
?you would have had to encountered that
in my eyes; really.
?Because I grew up in a fine for what it
is southern
?suburbanite city of west
?and racially it wasn't that bad. And
I've honestly
?pretty much always thought of
?ghetto parts--as pretty much being of a
whole other country.
?So on behave of those ignorant assholes,
I am personally
?deeply sorry for the troubles of your
youth. However, that
?was quite some time ago, and I hope you
have learned to let
?go a bit of the past so it doesn't
swallow you whole.
?But you are a fine & highly
intelligent and sensitive
?gentleman from your writing, and can
obviously see that you
?are not like that at all.
?
?But indeed, I'm glad to read from the
highlighted
?reader responses from those you've met
over the years,
?like me on the IMDB boards or YouTube,
that others have
?woke-up. Quite honestly, it's hard to
live over here in
?our economy and in these boring times.
Must say that
?I've don't care for it either as well,
but in the
?coming years, this faithful reader shall
most DEFINATELY be
?International Dating. ;) There's no
two ways about
?it. I'm not sure where our country went wrong,
but all
?of those who run it over the last four
decades TRUELY should
?be fucking ashamed of themselves. As
someone who has decided
?to become a multi-linguist, as I am
currently learning
?the Spanish & French languages, and
hopefully with my
?travels, I can meet a nice NON-American
woman. Your
?website gives me hope, as did recently
going abroad again
?one more time. And I pretty much agree
100% with everything
?you put on YouTube and that you've
wrote. I'm sorry
?to some of my fellow Americans, but for
the most part, we're
?assholes over here in this country, and
our women are
?absolute shit. I've seen the overrated
models,
?actresses & adult film stars from
other English speaking
?countries, and I'm afraid if that's the
best that
?got, then it's also complete shit in
other Anglo-Celtic
?societies.
?
?And might I add that I also agree with
the poor people
?who ex-pated here and were bored.
Indeed, living here is
?just way too expensive these days, and
we have no culture,
?just like all the other dullard colonies
of new-Europe
?(such as Aussie & Kiwi land, English
speaking Canada
?although parts of it are so lovely and
breath-taking there,
?etc). We are a society of suburbanite
Bowlers, miniature
?& pro-Golfers, and a sea of cheap-o
motels,
?laundrymats' and depressing adult book
stores and
?Casinos. And of course, an entire
fuck-load of gas station
?convenience stores. George Carlin (may
he RIP) on his
?next-to-last HBO stand-up special was
right: It's pretty
?much just one big trans-continental
cesspool now. Years ago
?he was so right about our future.
?
?So you have my sympathies, as I'm mostly
attracted
?to French accents and others that aren't
found really
?all that well in the America's (and I've
afraid our
?closest allies of the Commonwealth
nations don't really
?do much for me, or I would have
moved to Orlando or Vegas where
?the all mostly go on their holidays here
in the U.S. and would have
?married one) and as a result, I've
been depressed
?off & on, and have mostly only
talked to women online
?and been on a few dates here. To tell ya
the truth, and
?I've never told anyone this, most
American women,
?including many in my own
family, make my head spin.
?They just do. And I don't want
therapy over it
?or anything, but I'm just sick of
them. I'm
?sorry but it's the truth.
Despite what
racial differences or geographical ones some might think me and you would have,
I can tell that if we had grown up down the block from one
another, we would have been fast friends for life. And here is an
imaginary toast to all of the American-ized shit that we have to put up with
here. Take care, Winston,
https://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=6931
Admittedly, I am not a big fan of everything
that Winston Wu says and does, but I do believe there is a lot of truth in his
ideas.? My story is similar to his.? I grew up being told that I was a freak, a
weirdo, a homosexual, and a moron.? I
couldn't understand what I was doing wrong - I was smart, caring, insightful,
hardworking, ambitious, and prosocial.? I
couldn't understand why some people believed in all the drama that came from
living an antisocial life.?
I was punched, pushed into urinals, and
worse.? I became convinced there was
something wrong with me...I even seriously considered suicide when I was in
grade 11.? That was in 1999, when the
Columbine School Shootings happened, and I identified with Eric Harris and
Dylon Klebolt.
It wasn't until high school was done and that I
got into the real world that I realized that really, there isn't anything wrong
with me.? In fact, some people looked up
to me.?
More importantly, I discovered Filipinas.? Well, Filipinas discovered me.? What a change it was being told that I was
hunk.? After years of being humiliated in
school,? I finally found myself being
adored by Filipinas !!!? Not just loved -
lusted after.? I could be sweet, and
would get love back.? Gone were the days
of being punched for being a prosocial person.?
Western high schools reward mentally ill idiots who while ignoring
prosocial? go-getters who will actually
make a difference in this world.?
My unhappiness became a distant memory...now I
am loved, cared for, listened to.....Filipina girls respect my character.? They respect the fact that I am not just
lusting and gambling my life away. I got Filipina girls telling me I am so
handsome.? In fact, my Filipina
girlfriend's friends all send her messags telling her that she is so lucky to
have me, and one even asked whether it would be possible to marry my dad (she
assumed my dad must be similar to me).
More than anything, I feel vindicated.? I know that really, it isn't me.? I am normal; it was the people around me who
were mentally ill.
One could write an essay over one hundred pages
long about the benefits of having a Filipina girlfriend. Most men appeciate the
care, the devotion to family, as well as general sexiness of Filipinas as the
main reasons for choosing one. Also, many of them have been severely hurt from
a previous relationship with a Westernized lady, and are determined to find
someone who will never hurt them again.
For me, the best thing about having a Filipina
girlfriend is that I am able to show love, care, and affection and be accepted
and loved in return. Growing up, I was constantly told that I need to "man
up" and "be more aggressive." In Western culture, men are taught
to get what they want by fighting for it. You need to stomp on someone else's
head so they won't stomp on your head. I was told that I was not aggressive
enough, and that I needed to be a jerk to women. Men told me that I needed to
treat my girlfriend like she was a dog and make her beg for a treat. I needed
to be the prize.
For a while I actually (regretably) believed
that crap. But I quickly realized the nonsense for what it was. My heart
changed, and then I met Mahal. I know I can be sweet and caring, and not have
to worry about her treating me like a doormat. Westernized women often think
that being nice means being weak. In Filipina culture, being nice is returned
with kindness, and perhaps a bit of sex too.
When I am with Mahal, I feel like I can be
myself. I don't have to walk around all "macho" (whatever that is
supposed to mean). I can share my weaknesses, and we can laugh at each other in
a supporting way. I have finally realized that it really isn't me that is
wrong; for so long I had been with mentally ill people who viewed prosocial
people as a weakness. You can't blame a Palm Tree for not growing in
For the first time in my life, I have felt unconditional
love and acceptance being with Mahal.
To be with someone who values me so much brings
out the best in me. I want to be the best lover, the best husband, the best
father, and the best servant in her church. I don't have to fear that my efforts
will be replied with insult. I can serve her, cuddle her, listen to her, and
support her, and not fear rejection. She is the best lady, so I want to be the
best lover I possibly can be for her.
I wish all men still looking for their Filipina
love lots of good luck !!!!
Subject: Wu...Winston Wu.. Stirred, but never
shaken!
Hello Winston,
I first heard about you when talking on the
phone with John Benneth about homeopathy, skeptics, and he mentioned your
slugging it out with them. Googled you and found some of your enemies
on-line, too. Went to your HappierAbroad site and you make me
laugh, man. You're just trying to live the Cassanova life we all would if
we could, I think! :-) The Devil's in you as a strayed Christian,
indeed!! Then again, who am I to point out a man's sins?
I write to ask you a question which I already
know the answer for, but to get you thinking some about it. As time goes
by and all that kissing of strange women leaves you feeling empty inside --
wasted and depressed, but just masking it over in an actor's gig of enjoyment
and marketing -- what if you somehow channeled all that interest into
service of country?
You know what I'm getting at.
Who like to mingle, party, and have a sexy babe in each arm.
People like you who can take international businessmen on wife-seeking
/ wife-swapping tours.
Who can corrupt the souls of key politicians with those babes you keep.
A dangerous profession, indeed.
But, then someday you could write books, websites, and market yourself as
Winston Wu, the man who truly lived; A great patriot who knew how to
party just like Ben Franklin in France; As an old man regretful of his sins and intrigue, a repentant
Winston who returns to Christ again in shame....but a colorful life of a
great sinner gone great saint all the same. Some American arms delivered
abroad. Drugs imported. Russian babes in every port. Powerful
friends and mobsters in dark corners. Mixing and mingling with the
underworld and doing arms deals with Achmed while rendering key information
from the inside that
Wu....Winston Wu. Superagent
Extraordinaire. The King of Putang. Slayer of Arabian
Knights. Keeper of the Harems. International Man of
Mystery helping save the world from Dr. Evils and rabid sheiks! Gambling
with the hottest of chicks in
Where
Just a thought from General Quack.
I hate to see a brilliant, once Christian life
wasted on debauchery when, if adjusted a bit for God & Country,
why you could be a legend. Why not be all that you can be,
man?
Remember the saying? "Never entrust a sword to a man who
won't dance." And you, my friend, where once a
wallflower staring at his shoes, you dance with all the lovely ladies
today! This is a great warrior in the making, I smell. A
great novel not even yet written. Your parents and grandchildren
would be proud. Your critics would be held at bay as mere chickenshits
who never dared live the life you dared.
Just thinking maybe you might want to think
about adjusting your travels some and chasing putang in places like Mindinao
and
Warm regards and Happy New Year,
Sir Quacksalot
Hey Winston, my name is Mark and i live in northern nj. I love and appreciate your site. I agree with the vast majority of what you say on ALL topics. I'm 46 years old and a decent guy in all areas. I can't move out of the country as much as i would like to since it is not practical for me for several reasons. I won't bother with american women for the reasons we all know.
But i wanted to asked you about foreign born women living here and what you
think about them. Specifically several brick and mortor dating/matchmaking
services in the
Most of these services have good reputations. 2 of them are russian and eastern european women. 1 is for latin women from south and central american and the caribean. And several are asian women but only 2 are considered very good. Just wondering what you think and any advice you may have. I would greatly appreciate an email reply if you would please. Thank you Winston and Happy any Healthy New Year to you and your family.
Mark
Hi
Winston:
I
stumbled upon your website and learned a lot. You inspired me to get
out
of the
going
to
I
am moving to
What
are you up to now-a-days? It will be great to meet up or at least
chat
on phone sometime to share experiences. I currently live in San
Francisco
area.
Sach
Hi
Winston! First of all I want to thank you for your website, it is very
refreshing and motivating and encouraging to me as an American who's dating
life is virtually non-existant since my divorce in '06. I have a renewed
vigor and focus thanks to you and your site.
I
did want to bring to your attention, though, that a marriage agency sponsor you
have on your home page, anastasiaweb.com,
is a scam site that you can read about more here through this gentlemens site: www.agencyscams.com.
Apparantly this is one of the more insidious sites in this business and I just
wanted to bring it to your attention.
Secondly,
if you have the time, what advice would you have for a guy like me who has two
children (ages 7 and 5) who I am a dedicated father to, but who also wants to
explore the greener
pastures of the world's dating scene? As I
see it, I really can only be away from my kids for a few weeks at a time at
best, any ideas or do you perhaps know anybody in this same situation who made
the best of it? I don't think I can be the only guy with these responsibilites
who is looking for love abroad.
Thanks
again for you hard work in putting up such good news for us American men to
enjoy. I too was made very mentally ill for a long time from my devotion to evangelical
Christianity so we are kindred spirits in this
regard too. Even with that, I do wish all the richest blessings be upon you.
Sincerely,
Michael
Hi Winston,
Thank you for answering my
questions.
Yes, you may use my letter below on
your website. No problem.
Also, another question -- why are
so many Americans scared of each other? I live here in the
Or maybe I'm just intimidating, for
some reason?
The total lack of genuine human
interest amongst them is what really irks me. Being completely enveloped
in a shell, like you write in your many observations, and always in a
hurry to get rid of me. They have developed a whole array of phrases to
get people out of their lives. The easiest way for them to perform this
maneuver is just to tell you, "Alright, have a nice day" or "Oh,
ok!" or "It was nice meeting you." The killer is "I
have to let you go." The person cannot respond in any way but to
just nod his head and just leave, otherwise, he is perceived as a stalker
or harasser. Almost never have they ever asked me about my origins or the
meaning or root of my name, Dimitri, which is quite uncommon in the West.
On the subject of freedom, which
Russians regard in a completely different dimension, dissident author and
speaker Ward Churchill perfectly conveys my emotions when he writes:
"As things stand, persons
residing in the
Russians have the concept of volya,
which translates literally as "will". In essence, it is the
absence of the "overarching authority" of political correctness which
has developed to an advanced level in the
Also, one other question which I
desperately seek an answer -- why did I 'de-Americanize' so to speak? In
1999, I felt rather at home. Yet since, year after year, up through today
in 2009, I feel less and less American. Have you ever encountered this
phenomenon where immigrants suddenly have an urge to return to their native
lands after so many years here in the
Regards,
Dimitri
Hi
Winston,
Thank you for replying to my email.
It
is sometimes difficult for me to articulate my thoughts into words regarding
the way I feel about my situation. Usually, it's easier to explain it
orally -- but here I'll try my best.
I've
been living in the
The other problem I have is my projection of
I
also have some questions for you. Have you encountered the following in
the American character?
1. Cowardice -- from experience I have not noticed that Americans,
especially the men, tend to only act "tough" or "macho"
when in groups or in a "gang" -- they seem to gang up on others and
overflow with confidence when in a group, acting alone they rarely utter a
word. Could this also be related to the fact that they attack ONLY
countries which have absolutely no means of defending themselves?
Also, on the subject of cowardice, I have noticed that if an American, also
especially an American male, who holds pretenses about being someone's
"friend" - almost never stands up or speaks up for his fellow
"friend" - he just has this blank, empty look on his face.
Often, they will try to act innocent and ignorant, and always claim they don't
know. In theRussian
culture, most men will stand up or speak
up for their friends, even if the friend happens to be just an acquaintance.
I truly admire that in the Russian character -- the manliness and courage of
the Russian.
2.
Denial -- also from experience I have noticed that if someone points out the
obvious in another person, that person will instantly deny or repress this fact,
usually for fear of losing his or her job. Also, an exchange between an
American and myself:
Me:
What gives the
American: We're not occupying
This
denial is very common, I think, in the American character. They will act
inappropriately or in a juvenile, infantile manner and the very next day act
like absolutely nothing occurred.
3. Political correctness to the point of benign totalitarianism. This one
really takes the cake. From experience, working with Americans is
sometimes like trying to swallow a dead rat. They are so politically
correct about everything that it becomes tedious and painful to the soul.
The society is so totalitarian in my opinion, that it probably borders on the
insane. I have been reprimanded so many times on the job for saying
things slightly one centimeter to the left or to the right (not in the
political sense) of conventionality that I just have to bite my tongue and not
say a damn word for fear of upsetting or angering them.
One
example I can give you is from my job at a Marriott hotel.
I
approached the manager at the front desk as I was ready to go on my lunch break
and I asked her,
"I'm
going to lunch now, do you need any help?" She replied, "No,
I'm fine."
About
twenty minutes later she approached me in total hysteria and scolded me for
saying the word "lunch" at the front desk, because there was a
customer in front of us!!! This is something that you might find only in
an insane asylum.
I
apologize for the length and breadth of this letter, but I think that if fully
encapsulates my position regarding these freaks.
Hi
Winston,
Love your website. Very informative and a breath of fresh air. I am Russian myself and your assessment of Americans and the American way of life is very accurate. Also, your understanding of the
many negative aspects of the Russian character are also correct.
According
to the most recent statistics, the
I
would appreciate your response.
Thanks,
Dimitri
https://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=6719
HI!?
3 years ago I
discovered this site and thought 2 things......?
Please read on and don't get hung up on number 2 below :)
1) It has a
whole lot of content that I had already thought myself, even though I was very
relationally inexperienced and had never been (still have never) outside of the
US.
2) While it
does indeed speak to true and real problems in the US society, I thought (and
in some of these aspects, still think) it is also extremely and fundamentally
biased, cynical, self-limiting, immature, negative, poorly presented and backed
up with fallacies in logic, and does not at all focus on anything productive to
addressing these problems in this society (abandoning it for greener pastures
is making the social problem worse, not improving it).? At that time, 3 years ago, I forgot all about
it and moved on in pursuit of the American woman.
?
With fierce
confidence, determination, and faith in myself, I set out to get into the
experience of the American woman.? This
lead into a relationship, followed by cold-hearted rejection, followed by a
repetition of this, and a number of other interactions with ladies which went
nowhere fast...? sort of like skipping
the relationship and going right to rejection mode.
As a man in my
30's, with an athletic, muscular build, decent looks, many achievements,
focused on health, spiritually inclined, intuitive and in touch with my
feelings and inclined to treat women with respect and kindness, I can not at
all relate to the rather pitiful description of the self that I see described
here in some of the posts and articles.?
In fact, one might imagine I should do well in the relationship world in
the
However, after
3 years in this cycle, I begin to see that I was wrong and you are right.? If I am to be absolutely honest, I have to
admit that relationships here have gone absolutely nowhere for me.? I have spent 3/4 of the last 3 years single,
companion-less, and sexless, and have been rejected more times than I care to
count.? I have given beyond what was
probably reasonable and it was not enough.?
I have even challenged myself to respond with love and understanding as
women suddenly did a 180 degree switch and coldly rejected me, looking at me
like an alien when just a week before, I was the most "wonderful, perfect
guy" for them.? I have come to see
that, with American women, it seems as if it is not worth the effort that it
takes to get past the so called "number-close".? I have had too admit that I am confused and
clueless as to how to function with women in this social atmosphere.
I have come to
the crude and difficult position of having to accept that the social scene, and
especially the relationship scene, is extremely BLEAK at best here, in what
seems like a VERY LONELY nation (saying that with no direct experience at all
of other nations).? An endless cycle of
meaningless, non-committal dating experiments and breakups seems commonplace,
and even that is not really an easy thing to get into - it takes a heck of a
lot of pursuit and effort for a man to even get into that experience.?
I find myself,
a person who places a profound reverence on health and life, flirting with, or
even what feels like pandering and fawning over women who are very attractive,
but who abuse themselves with alcohol, tobacco, or use men like toilet paper,
seem to want men who use them like toilet paper, or who seem totally
disinterested in even talking with me, or who need alcohol to break their own
social barriers... women who I should not even be wasting my time talking with
at all, but should instead have compassion for as I let them down and tell them
that I am not interested in them, and yet I can not even get a date with these
women, much less a relationship!? Not
even with drunks and smokers!?
It often feels
like I simply lack the social technology to break down the barriers,
inhibitions, and fears - it is like one needs some sort of advanced social
skills and pick up skills... and needs to have that rock solid every day they
are under the woman's scrutiny.? However,
I am just a human like anyone else - I have regular human issues and
insecurities and in a relationship, I try to just figure it out as I go along
and be authentic about my inner struggles and such... but this seems to not fly
at all in this society, where the women seem to want a perfect man who has it
all figured out and has the perfect social skills and perfect answer at all
times. Being accepted for who you are is a virtually ridiculous fantasy from my
experience.
So, I am coming
to see that I would indeed like to try to see if my fantasy notion of a better
life actually exists somewhere on the Earth. A place where the women are women,
the men are men, and people actually want committed relationships, the women
actually need men, the men actually need women, and no one is afraid to admit
it, and no one needs to run master game or have the perfect personality, or the
perfect looks for that matter.
Hence, I am
writing to ask for recommendations of places to go...
A little about
what I am interested in:
***1)
Locations: A place where it is easy to stay for an extended time and the
American dollar has a much greater buying power than their money (so France or
Italy would be out, for example, but S. America, some Euro countries and SE
Asia would be good). A place where I can live comfortably with no automobile on
1,000 USD per month.
I am
especially interested in
I have read the
info I could find here about locations, but all I see is a lot of
recommendations in favor of the
2) Language: at
least intermediate Eng
3) Looks: a
voluptuous figure - it's all in the hips
4) Chemistry
and compatibility are crucial:? I have
learned through experience that this can not be revealed through a computer
screen, so I have no interest whatsoever in online communication with a woman
for months before going to visit her only to find that she is beautiful but
there is no chemistry.? My way will be to
travel there and meet women on the spot, so fire away with your suggestions for
where to do this.
5) Outdoors
activity - I want a woman who either goes on outdoors excursions with me or at
least allows me to go mountaineering and such myself.
6) Health - no
interest whatsoever in party girls, alcohol, drug scene, or fat, lazy, fast
foodies.? I want to be able to meet her
in a healthy setting like a store or work or church or volunteer project and
make an easy natural connection without alcohol, clubs, or parties.? I can not stand these environments.
And what about
As for me, I am
white, 30's, athletic build and have to many gifts to offer going to waste on
unavailable American women.
Thrilled to get
any feedback I can and sorry it took me so long to get my head out of my
ass!? Feel free to PM me, or post here.
if this is the
wrong thread for these kind of questions, please refer me to the right one.
~Jay
Subject:
Excellent Observations
Winston
-
I came across your website while searching online for people who had made
observations similar to mine.
I am a former American expat who has had to return to
Your description of sex life is especially accurate. In the states, I have sexual
interactions at a much slower pace, and sometimes go long periods with no
success at all. Furthermore, when I do "score," as Americans call it,
it tends to be with much less attractive women than I had grown used to in
You are also exactly right in describing how attractive women in
One mystery I have been trying to understand, though, is why there are
Europeans who willingly move to the states. Since I have been back, I have
reached out to European expat communities here, so as to find more easy-going
sociable people. However, Europeans that come to the states tend to be more
conservative-minded, and often quickly fall into the plain, boring and
unintelligent American norm. In
In describing these sentiments to a friend recently, he interjected: "This
country was founded by religious fanatics and goat-fucking peasants from
The United States essentially plays the role of the giant shitting ground for
all of the world's undesirables: rather than the poor, tired masses, it is the
religious, greedy, rich, superficial, narrow-minded, prudish freaks that we
most welcome in the Land of the (buy one, get one) Free.
Keep up the good work!
Sincerely,
dude your website rocks!
I'm a Chinese guy also, and living in the
I discovered
what you now know about the reality of courting and dating American women some
many years ago.
As a middle
aged guy, never married, I?m now in a serious relationship with a Hispanic
woman, very beautiful, in
Here in
Arkansas, in the lower Midwest (midsouth), where I grew up, still today, (and
I?m 45), rarely ever, do I ever get any beautiful women approaching me, either
at a bar, in public, or anywhere that wishes to get to know me for simply being
a guy. Unless I have a charade or dog and pony show, or act or mask to put on,
to this very date, I?ve never had a woman approach me just to be nice and hint
to me that she?s interested in getting to know me personally. I?ve never been
aggressive or lowered myself to the level of lying to entrap and deceptively
lure the opposite sex, simply because of loneliness and desperation. (Hence,
I?m still single and don?t regret it.)
Our horrible
culture sends mixed messages, and has for years regarding our roles, both male
and female, and the social ritualistic nature, which has become tarnished and
clouded with apprehensiveness and indecisiveness regarding the haphazard
introductory social skills when meeting someone of the opposite sex.
The break down
of masculine roles and norms has eroded the male into feminized males without
spines. Women know they have power, and they show it when competing and playing
the dating and courting realm. It?s all about power and control when playing
the market and participating in the game. Ever notice the onslaught of popular
top forty music lyrics? Hmmmm, guess how many continuous songs are sang about
females having domination and power over their male counterparts, even in the
introductory level in the poetry of the music.
No doubt WU, I
eventually overcame the obstacle of datelessness a long time ago, simply by
leaving our nations borders.
The
To this date,
I, by myself, while often setting at a social bar drinking will explain this
phenomenon to my fellow male patrons besides me, and still today, they don?t
believe me, or think that it?s possible to be happy and meet a woman from
another culture who actually likes you, simply because you?re an American guy.
They?re so brainwashed and pessimistic, all because they?ve given up hope and
settled; settled for taking no for answer and being turned down, like most
modern day males.
Women from
other cultures have always told me this, ?American act like and present
themselves with a confidence all because they have a since of entitlement and
are spoiled with the men who cave in and become submissive. American men are in
demand everywhere else in the world, except
Peace Wu- You
Rock!
JD
'I
believe that banking institutions are more dangerous to our liberties than standing
armies. If the American people ever allow private banks to control the issue of
their currency, first by inflation, then by deflation, the banks and
corporations that will grow up around the banks will deprive the people of all
property until their children wake-up homeless on the continent their fathers
conquered.'
Thomas Jefferson 1802
And 206 years later, look where we are.
https://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=4278
?Winston's blogs and photojournals are epic! I have a new internet
hobby now: reading Winston's stories.
I'm moving to
I'm a 32-year old Canadian guy and I am actually fairly attractive (so
much for modesty) and educated and so on. I spent 2 years teaching English in
I'm a "nice guy". I don't let people walk all over me but I'm
not about to go out and hurt others, either. I've been back in
So, I'm giving up my well-paying job here and going back overseas and I
don't know if I'm ever coming back. If I can find someone to marry and raise a
family with, all the better. At the very least I'll be somewhere where people
aren't such a-holes. If
Winston is absolutely right from my experiences. I had to go somewhere
and then come back to see the light, but I definitely see it.?
I left Europe when i was 14 to go to Texas and spend 5 years
in america i also went to Georgia and New Jersey...the first time i arrived in
america since i was 14 the first thing on my mind was to go chat up some
beautiful american girls in the hopes of meeting some for the first time in my
life...as some friends introduced me to some girls they knew , we started
hanging ot a bit and talking etc...then when it was time to say goodbye and go
our separate ways i kiss the girl on the chick since this is how we culturally
say goodbye or greet each other in Europe...my friends rushed back to me and
asked me "Why did you kiss he on the chick!!??? now she thinks you are in
love with her !!! " i was surprised that we were not able to have such
body contacts...but from that day i knew i wasn?t going to have as much
fun...another thing that struck me the most is the social behaviors that hot
white american girls have acting like they are better than guys buy trying to
achieve ultimate independence driving cars at 16 yers old etc... what i also
hated was when they ignore you when you wlk in the hallway even know they see
you but act like you are not there...girls in america dont seem to be ok with
letting you go out with them and always put you in what they call the "friend
zone" which basically everybody in america is in or at least the majority
of them...and america also has so many virgins , not to forget the 40 years old
virgin movie they made in trying to give hope to american citizens...and what
about that show called the pick up artist with that guru guy called
Mystery....his clients look depressed...its just scary to live like that and it
sure is not healthy ...humans need one another in america not only is it hard
to have sex...but to americans romantic behaviors are considered either weak or
weird or needy...you name it...and what baffles me the most is no one talks
about it and when you bring it up you sound crazy or something...they are just
hypocrites...i couldnt bare the nasty food they give at lunch compared to the
food in Europe...and we have no room to breath at school for example not enough
time to socially feel one another... back in Europe we have 2 breaks one of 15
or 60 minutes at 10.30 and lunch break of almost 2 hours so we can do
activities etc...in america you have to stay stuck inside and just have one
lunch then keep ignoring each other if you ever run into each other in the
hallways....everything you say id true Winston i could go on....anyway, what
pains me the most is that even tough i am back in europe i still find it hard
to go up to a hot girl because of how the hot girls treated me in america
...but i recently found the courage back and it worked i am slowly getting
better like i used to be before i went to america....keep up the good work Winston
because its a disgrace what is happening in America right now...lol they even
have this to catch a predator show because women are too hard to be with
apparently....its such a sick country....we are definitely happier
abroad....thanks alot Bro....CIAO....
Hello Winston:
I am reading your revised, updated book as of August 2009, and I must say that
so far it's are real eye-opener.
I especially liked the topic about hippies, and how even hippies chicks are
judgmental about looks.
Not too long ago, I was at an all-outdoor event where hippies and political
progressives were championing the whole "legalize marijuana" issue. I
had the chance to meet several hippie chicks, and you're right when you say
that they too are discriminatory, as if guys like us don't have any sexual
desires. I talked to plenty of these women and the only guys they seemed to be
hooked up with or interested in were fellow low-life, tatooed hippies like themselves.
Now don't get me wrong, I am not against the peaceful side of hippies. I too
think that we need to be non-violent. But nevertheless, your points were
greatly made about why men have to leave this country for love, romance, and
sex rather than join some cult.
Also, what men who are suffereing this loneliness lifestyle fail to realize is
that even hippies and church-going people still live in the brutal matrix that
everyone else lives in. They are no more escaping it then every non-hippy and
every non-religious person. And being that hippies and church people are living
in this matrix, they too judge their fellow human beings by how much money they
make, how popular they are, and how good-looking they are. There's no escaping
it. Hippies are hippies because they need a pseudo cause to explain why they
want to be poor, dumpy, and lay around smoking weed all the time. In all
reality, hippies are actually mooches, and very rarely are they the types that
will open their homes or shantys to someone and say "Come in, we'll feed
you and give you a place to stay!" They are very narcissistic. The whole
1960s social experiment proves what idiots and phonies these people really are.
They all morphed into the same characters in the 1983 movie The Big Chill, followed
up by the late 80s series Thirtysomething. That's what hippies became;
self-centered, selfish yuppies.
Anyways Winston, I don't want to get into a three page discussion on this
subject. But I do want to say good job on your ebook. You are a brilliant orator
and you are very good at articulating in succinct detail the plight of men
today. Keep up the good work.
Steve
Dude,
You are 100%
right about european women and american women
It is so easy
to meet women in
If you are well
traveled, well spoken and educated you will meet the nicest girls
I traveled all
over
I married a
beautiful girl from the
I wasted years
on carribean cruises, and should have gone to
I support your
comparison 100%.
American women
don't get it.
In my travels I
would say in
Russians,
Latvian, Ukrainian are the nicests and sweetest.
John
Hello Winston,
My name is Kostas and I am from
That's all for now! Thanks for your time and don't give
up. There are 200 countries out there, America IS NOT the whole world, unlike
many of your countrymen believe. I think if more americans
had the opportunity to travel more and see different
countries and different lifestyles it would be a very
pleasant cultural shock to them and they would start
realizing that they should change a lot of things about their lives. That way
Hey Winston,
Yes, I was able
to view the photojournals. And I think you did a good job on the videos,
too. The two women were down-to-earth and approachable (which you were
aiming for), and I think you successfully conveyed these qualities. I also
viewed your other videos and I think you have good presentation skills. A
video I found particularly funny was the one in which you attempted
to greet strangers in
I did read some
of the comments for some of the videos, and saw a lot of vitriol
to go along with some praise. I interpreted the venom in these
comments as jealosy and envy. Instead of these men appreciating the
initiative you've taken to open doors for other men, they'd rather sit on
their couches and attack. And the women are angry that they can no longer
derive pleasure in rejecting people like you and me anymore as more men
discover they can now have a great social/dating life overseas. Don't
allow the bashing to stop you from continuing to spread a life-changing
message for legions of men.
As for the
quote, yes you can use it. In fact, you can use my real name - Jelani. I'm from
NY.
Take care
Hey Winston,
I'm really
impressed with the cultural knowledge of the posters on your forum. I
was reading my thread last night that you linked, and I'm going
to comment in it this morning about how I might have a hard time deciding
which country to go to first!
Some countries
that I was interested in were a discovery, and that's a good thing. I've always
been fascinated, for example, with Romanian gymnasts and their grace and
elegance. So to hear the country is receptive towards black men excites me.
When I travel,
I really hope to gather additional informational and maybe be another cultural
consultant for you from an African American's perspective!
I was looking
at the pictures in your photojournal and book, and you're very right: you can
literally see the difference between American/non-American in terms of openness
and curiosity women in just their eyes. When I was looking at the
non-American female pictures, I thought to myself that I could easily ask them
out with confidence, whereas when I saw pictures of the American females, I felt
just the opposite. It's not surprising that you can get bad vibes
from American women just by seeing their picture!
Your book has
exposed me to a paradigm shift with regard to dating. My collection of
dating/seduction books is now merely a repository of rubbish.
Jelani from NY
Hi,
I'm
really inspired by your website. I hope you can give me a word or two of
advice. I'm a white (Irish American) male,
21 years old, studying
computer science. I'm hoping to go tograd school abroad. The obvious choice for me would be
However,
I wonder if
So,
what I'm asking is, does your advice about traveling and making friends abroad apply to all countries besides the
Thanks
for your time and your advice. I hope I get to go abroad like I plan and
break out of this cargo
cult I feel I'm trapped in.
Conor
Subject:?
Awesome! your a hero with your site HAPPIER ABROAD
Hello
Im Jo`mell
All
of that information on your site was literally stealing the words out of my mouth..I agree I agree with everything..Im
actually planning a trip to russia and I know
there are alot of beautiful girls and stuff, but i dont want to end up
getting a scammer or even having a run in with skinheads over there...Tell
me alittle where I should go for that and places to avoid theneo nazi skinheads and such! Thanks very much
Jo`mell
Winston,
you're absolutely right about foreign women vs American "women".
Foreign women are far more cultured, intelligent, sociable and sophisticated
than American women. I can honestly say that once you meet a foreign woman, you
will never go back to an American woman again. You've mentioned this in your
forum, but this trip abroad confirmed everything you said. You're absolutely
right. Keep up the good work.
I am conner,, i have made several posts on your forums already.... go
ahead and read them and tell me what you think. My posts are very accurate..
Alcohol and ego are the two main problems here in the
I agree with everything you say. It made me realize just further how
bad american women suck! I am british and german. im 6'2
220lbs,, all muscle..Im a fitness model. And even i am having a very tough time
with the attitude of american women.....
There is something about the english language that turns women into
pigs and makes them have a bad ego...... And it also has to do with the fact
that they are basically living their whole lives in fear of everythign in
the
also with foregin language there is less ego.. there is something that
the foreign language does to their brain patterns that makes them
more wholesome looking and more feminine.... you can see it in their eyes ,
their face and their souls ....YOU WERE RIGHT ABOUT THAT! wow...
I am completely done with american women... I am now searching online
for euro women.... mainly russian or hungarian or czech... thats what i like...
IF you can offer me any support on where to find the women that i want.. let me
know... im going to continue to read your site... ,let me know what you think
about the feedback i gave you here
Conner
Winston,
Awesome website buddy. Reading your experience abroad vs. in the
states with the white ladies, I felt like I was reading about myself.
It's unfortunate that as Asian
American men, you and I face a severe
uphill battle in the dating scene in the
States. Whether we like it
or not, due to negative media portrayals of Asian men in the states
and negative perceptions, we are at the bottom of the dating pool
here, and it's frustrating as hell. I can remember stretches where I
would study in coffee shops, talk to attractive white women, add them
on Facebook,
then get rejected constantly when asking them out for
dinner or drinks, it certainly wasn't for a lack of effort that my
dating life wasn't going anywhere in the States. I'm into Asian gals,
but let's face it, it's a numbers game, and when 90% of the available
chicks around you are white, the odds are stacked against you as an
Asian man here. I might just have to take a trip to
I'm a huge fan of Eastern European women, and from my interactions
with them in the states, they are one of the few white women who are
genuinely into Asian guys.
Cheers,
Dan
http://www.ultraguest.com/view/1200586414
Winston, you truly are an inspiration. I am 26, going on 27,
and the only difference between my life in the
"I thank you Winston from the bottom of my heart for showing me
and other lonely men THE WAY to
"Thank you Winston for all of your help. Your knowledge and
experiences are inspirational and GOLDEN and you are well liked and honored by
MANY. Do not let the HATERS get you down.?
Because these types of people will not do for themselves, than to bash
you all day in B.S. topics and post. Why don't they step outside the matrix and
go abroad to be happy also?? Keep up the
good work my friend. You're doing EXCELLENT !!!"
"It's such a wonderful time in my life and YOU are the person I
thank for this guidance and for making HappierAbroad.com and giving lonely guys
everywhere a chance at solutions and cures to datelessness and hope to having a
life that is fullfilled overseas. I'm so excited and so happy now
Winston."
?- Dwayne from
Dear Sir:
I just came across your article on the net about the Twelve Reasons Why Russian
Women Are NOT Desperate To Leave Their Country ....
I was blown away and
amazed at your insight i wanted to thank you for the info, I totally
agree with you, it was very enlightening to me and and have found
that your insight into Russian women is dead on from my own
experience in getting to know a few. They are so beautiful
inside and out that @ first your taken aback thinking this can't be real,
they gotta be putting me on. You put it so aptly....
" They are simply sweeter, more modest, unspoiled, friendly,
unparanoid, etc. and they do not have the self-righteous and arrogant tone that
many American women have. " In otherwords real women.
regards
Hi Winston,
I ran into your website because I was researching Christianity and I have to
say thank you! What you say about American women and esp. the list of 10
reason why you're forced to look abroad are so true. This is coming from
me, a white Irish-German male who's in the computer field, been told he is good
looking, 5' 11" and broad shoulders, yet I'm not rich, always had a belly
and the key thing, and I'm guessing the same is true of you, above average
intelligence. Women in the
All I know is, I am frustrated as hell and I'm no longer interested in them.
One question: Are there some more voluptuous women out there in
Dave
P. S. I skimmed over some of what you wrote about Christianity and all I
have to say is that the vast majority of content of Paul's letters are
contradictory to Jesus' teachings (this is what I was specifically looking for
and I heard that authors like Leo Tolstoy believe it as well) and that a
group of men canonized scripture, basically out of political pressure and
mutual interest and benefit. So, I am just as fascinated if not more so
in what was LEFT OUT of the Bible as much as what should not have been
included.
Hello
Winston,
My
name is John, and I am currently living in
Asian men in
I admire
you Winston. Great Job. I do not know how you did it, but you are a inspiration
to me. The woman love you, thats so awesome. Write back to me if you have time.
I will keep reading your website.
Thank you,
John
Hello
Winston,
I just found your website online, and just wanted to drop you a line, and let
you know a little about me and my new business venture. I like you was fed up
with all of the difficulties with American
women, though unlike you I ended up in the
I wanted to let you know (at minimum) about my new website www.personalmatchmaker.net,
that I have recently launched.
Winston,
I like
your site.. Or at least what I could see of it. You know it?s amazing how many
guys I?ve been meeting that all feel the same way. I myself have been to back
and forth to Ukriane several times. I know that if I ever get married, it will
be to a beautiful Ukrainian lady.
I like
your youtube videos too. Keep up the great job and happy travels.
Hey Winston,
Yes, I was able
to view the photojournals. And I think you did a good job on the videos,
too. The two women were down-to-earth and approachable (which you were
aiming for), and I think you successfully conveyed these qualities. I also
viewed your other videos and I think you have good presentation skills. A
video I found particularly funny was the one in which you attempted
to greet strangers in
I did read some
of the comments for some of the videos, and saw a lot of vitriol
to go along with some praise. I interpreted the venom in these comments
as jealousy and envy. Instead of these men appreciating the
initiative you've taken to open doors for other men, they'd rather sit on
their couches and attack. And the women are angry that they can no longer
derive pleasure in rejecting people like you and me anymore as more men
discover they can now have a great social/dating life overseas. Don't
allow the bashing to stop you from continuing to spread a life-changing
message for legions of men.
As for the
quote, yes you can use it. In fact, you can use my real name - Jelani. I'm from
NY.
Take care
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OwkYiCJ0rJU
?So
true! I went to
Hi
I read your
accounts on your happier abroad site and have been inspired and motivated to
travel overseas. I have a very similar story to yours, but with one difference:
I'm currently married and African-American. However, my wife and I are about to
divorce, and I have always struggled in the dating scenes despite looking
reasonably attractive. This is why I have remained with my wife even
though she is selfish and treats me like a pile of trash. I have had
a lot of bad experiences with American women and feel my dating chances are
slim to none after I lose her.
Just looking at
the inequality between the sexes on dating sites let alone in real life dismays
me. I don't want to be forced to just accept whatever female
"chooses" me. I want to be on a level-playing field and I think
traveling will help. Your own narrative has convinced me.
My only
question is: do you think my being an African-American will be
an impediment from experiencing the success you've had if I travel to
I'm eager to
hear back from you!
James
http://www.ultraguest.com/view/1200586414
WW your website is fantastic! I could feel for you when I was in my 20s. All of your bio sounded like something I would write and I'm not even a man (I guess I'm one of those .00000001% of American women that actually have class and culture!Anyway congrats to you Dianne and Angelo that was a very inspiring story, see the nice guys finish last, but BEST! Best wishes to you.
Request to be
on mailing list and your fiancee Dianne and your pics, congratulations, I have
been to
I also aspire
to write an Ebook about my experiences but focusing on East vs West,
Hello,
It seems like you have also been with hot girls with very nice
legs. do you have some nice pics of you making out with a girl with very
nice legs? again, I can never get anyone like that and haven't been
able to make out with a girl for over 10 years at least. I am interested
in hearing or seeing some of the hottest girls you've done. It would make
me very jealous, and you can have fun making me jealous talking or sharing pics
of girls you know I probably would never get myself. I know you
have the collage, but the pictures are small and not as clear. thank
you. ?grant
Hi winston, I'm a big fan of yours. Do you have any nice big/clear pics of you with some hot white girls? I never have any success with white girls as I'm asian myself. I am so jealous how you are able to get some hot white girls.... and even get to kiss them somehow. If you would like to show me how you are much better than me at finding hot girls to make out with, please send me a pic so I can be envious and look up to you more. thankyou..
To Mr Winston Wu,
Hi Im Joe I have just stumbled on your website Happier Abroad and I think its
great what you did and achieved abroad in
I have even tried many russian websites and the women on these photos nearly
all look like models, and I think russian women are the most beautiful women
in the world and are very elegant and tall and like you would
love to experience the russian women.
I purchased your Ebook yesterday through paypal and still not received it and I
hope your Ebook will help me accomplish my fantasies I have longed for. I
was wondering do you send me it by email or what as I have never seen a Ebook
before!
I hope to hear from you soon and am fast becoming a fan of yours:))))
Best regard
Joe:)
https://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=4742
Hey whatsup, im Ishmell. Im 24 years old and I currently
live in
Youtube comments on Kairosan?s video reviews of
Happier Abroad:
?Seeing Wu's website makes me realize that
there really are better girls out there to meet and I wish one day I can visit
all these places to meet real girls worth talking too. Here in
"Thanks a milion. my concept of America's
culture has changed from a 180 degree angle just from reading that book( shouts
in joy) Finally, I now know why people act the way they act here in the
states!!!"
"I love this ebook, it's fulfilled with
many answers that I was dire to learn. like you, I was once wondering why it
was so difficult to make any friends in high school, and now, I know exactly
why. I 'm gonna recommend this book to my gf, she claims that none of her
friends seem to care much about her anymore or doesn't have time to hang out
with her even when they're off, I kept telling her that American s and western
societies un-writing rule is to be "selfness's" and to only pay
attention to those that they value. she thought that perhaps there was
something wrong with her when in fact there isn't. Thanks a million and if it's
okay with you, how about I do a video on why people should buy your e-book, you
can posted up on your site. Gotta run and I'll just read this book ALL
day..."
man - you are the man - i have looked
through very briefly on your site - but i want to walk in your footsteps man -
i'm depress here in the U.S - no action - absolutly no satisfaction - i see
some of your fotos - all fo the girls look hot to me.
i don't even have any chances with the ugly
girls here in the U.S - sucks.
https://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=4742
Hi all, I'm Jon. I've lurked around here for a while and finally signed up. I'm
a youthful 40, in great shape ,and own a few web businesses. I lived for about
10 years in
Perhaps it's because I stayed gone so long, but when I returned to the
I appreciate Winston doing this site because frankly, I know he's right. Before
I moved abroad my social life in the
I've been back a couple of years and I've really tried to make things happen
here. But now I have finally had enough. This year (2009) I'm planning to leave
the country. I haven't decided exactly where I'll go yet (I'm considering a few
places), but I do know that I'm definitly leaving, and "sooner rather than
later."
I have seen the quality of my social and dating life go down significantly here
in the
If anyone wants to chat and/or share info about moving abroad, please be in
touch. I'm social and cooperative by nature (as opposed to paranoid and
competitive). Perhaps that's WHY I don't fit in the
Be well,
Jon
Hi Winston
My name is Tony Chan working in silicon valley. I stumbled upon your
website and think you hit it dead
on the head. Are you in the SF bay area? I will buy you a cup of coffee.
Regards
Tony
SWEET
website. WOW! Inspiring, useful, fun. Fascinating to see the
reactions of your readers!
As one pointed
out, you really are a leader. Unusually truthful and courageous.
Other dating
sites seem to focus either on getting laid, or on scoring with working
girls.
You do
acknowledge that side of masculinity, which we all have, but you also admit the
need for love, warmth, affection. This is what is hardest to get here in
Like you I was
an outcast growing up, but I eventually learned to play the game well enough to
get laid. Ironically, it's still extremely hard to find love!
OK, like so
many I am going to ask your advice.
My boys, my
brother and I are planning to emigrate - to get out of "the
Matrix." We are tall, athletic, talented, white-looking,
All-American types, but with stubborn Armenian temperament, and old-fashioned
red-blooded values, good manners, and lots of education.
We are all
single. We are all looking for young, virtuous women to give us
children. (Sounds kind of politically incorrect, doesn't it?) We
want to settle permanently in a place with strong family values and no
American-style rat race.
And when
it comes to women, we want what many of your readers want. Slender
women. Warm, loving, feminine natures. Sexual
reponsiveness. Intelligence and depth, but not necessarily a lot of
formal education.
Personally, I
would also prefer an environment where women were tolerant of a man
having multiple, above-board, committed longterm relationships.
We all speak
some Spanish, have dated Asians or Filipinas as well as Latinas, and learn
languages easily. We have family friends in countries ranging from
I'm hoping that
you might be able to help me narrow the choice a bit.
I understand
that the Philippines is better for settling permanently than Thailand, because
of the more open society and easier acceptance of white foreigners into the
family.
But I'm also
curious how you see the
I'd be honored
to hear your thoughts.
Hike (aka
Jester)
Hello Winston,
I came across this page looking for other sites of immigrants from other places
that were thinking of leaving the divided states of
A little bit about myself. I am from
This country, no offense, is dead, cultureless, lifeless, prude in many ways,
and completely uncivilized. I now work for a german firm and spent the
last six months working in
Now of course I cannot say that any country is perfect. All places have
their pros and cons, but I simply cannot live with the fact of living in a
country that thinks its the greatest piece of land on the planet, has the
biggest ego about it, and has the mass propaganda on the media to make every
american believe that they are god's gift to the world, while not knowing
anything about the remaining countries on the planet. Most americans dont
even know what the capital is of their neighbors,
A friend told me once that the american ego stems from from this country
scoring an A, and all the others scoring a C or less the last few
decades. I would have to say this country scores a big fat F in my
book. 5% of the worlds
population using 25% of the worlds energy and creating 40% of the worlds
trash doesnt score high on my list.
And lets not forget that this country has had George
W Bush as president for eight years... what madness... and then
this place was dumb enough to not just vote him in the first time, but then to
vote him in again... and lets not forget that John McCain and Palin made a serious run at
the white house... again that is only possible here, where the population
is kept ignorant to anything else in the world, and lead the lives that they do
because they do not know anything different or better.
Being German I find it especially frustrating because this country has an
obsession with everything WW2 and Adolf Hitler.
One turns on the history channel (or as I call it the war channel) to view
history that happened a very long time ago... not that is a bad thing to learn
a little history, and we all know most americans are not very educated about
anything that happens outside of this place, but I have had enough of nazi
jokes, beer jokes, or the comments that we actually wear Lederhosen every day,
drink 20 beers a day, and eat nothing but pretzels and sausages, and that all
of us have a Porsche (would be nice though).
I am not saying that everyone should be a world expert, but the average
american could not point out my country or the continent it is located in on a
map. Sure, most people overseas are not expert either, but everyone can
at least point on a map and knows the basic geography of the world.
A lady in her forties recently asked me how big
Another acquaintance of mine was actually firmly decided that he wanted to
learn swiss. Anybody that knows anything about
Ohh, and here is a new concept, I am typing this email in my second language,
and I speak and write better english than most americans
do. Or as I heard once, here is a joke:
When one speaks three languages: they are trilingual
Wehn one speaks two languages: they are bilingual
When one speaks only one language: they are american
Do not get me wrong, I have met some great people here and have made some good
friends, but these are usually individuals that feel the same way that I do,
have traveled a little bit, and are certainly not representative of the average
person here.
My biggest problem besides the ego, is the distinct lack of culture. If
country music, loaded six shooters, and cowboy hats are culture, then so be
it. I am proud of my
country, have an over D sticker on the back of my Audi, and a
flag on my aviator jacket along with a european union one, but I would never do
that in germany. Is it really necessary here to fly the american flag in
front of every apartment complex, house, mcdonalds, shopping mall, business,
etc...? Is it really right to instill the american ego from day one in
children, making them at a young age recite the pledge of allegiance in classrooms, and
breed ignorance and egos.
People in
And lets not forget the silly sports that are played... baseball and especially
football are so bloody boring.... ohh yea... there a have to be different
sports, so this way an american team can be world champion every year.
And lets not forget the blatant stupidity of the american units of
measurements.... its 2009, and everybody else is on the metric system which
actually makes sense.
The distinct lack of identity is rather strange as well. A now ex friend
told me that he was Irish. I asked if he was either born in
Not to go on too long, but lets not forget that people here have no health
insurance, no way to help them in times of need, no infrastructure with
constant dependence on automobiles, but this place can justify a nice
large military and bases around the world to protect the american interests of
consumption... give me a break
And last but not least, there is no freedom here. There are laws and
regulations about everything. There are certain financial freedoms here,
but what good is it if you can not enjoy it. One can have guns, which by
the way causes extreme crime and violence here compared to the rest of he west,
but once can be arrested from drinking a beer in public, of showing as much as
a buttcheek.... nice freedom!!
If you know of any other germans in the
Regards,
Been here too long and is counting the days until the big move back across the
pond
H
I think this maybe a beginning of a beautiful friendship. :)
I've stumbled upon your website while I was searching for articles on foreign
women. Though, this may NOT have been an accident. My name is Jerry Orphe and I
live in
I've read many of your available articles so far, plus your personal intro . I
must say, I can relate what you have been through in this country. I haven't
dated any girl in my life. And everywhere I move from state to state, it was
the same. At least you had on several occassions, even though it didn't last
too long.
My email is quite lenghty, I must warn you, but I think it's a reflection as to
where I've been through, and where I'm coming from. Feel free to take some time
to read through, if you like.
Ever since I was born, I went through tough love in society. Sure there were
some exceptions but overall it has been pure mediocrity. To this day, it's
tough love with me for the most part, though I've managed to eat some crow and
get used to it. And with American women, it's no exception. I've learned in
recent months (hard to believe) that you can't trust them nor have any
intestinal fortitude for true relations with them; they are either twofaced, or
cunning.
I've never had any "luck" with them, there would love to hide their
true feelings about me. And then I tried online dating in the
her a visit. (This come months after I met this woman while I was in
might pay her a visit. But when I came back, she was gone. I couldn't get a
straight answer from her for weeks. She said she was in
I'm always been taking care of myself, I know what I was doing; you ain't my
daddy! You f'n asshole. You can kiss my ass goodbye, you &%#!!!!" And
I go, "ookey....dah' I took that back....sorry!!!" like a b*tch. I
was patrified, to say the least. Obviously, I had to eat some crow and play PC
with her because she was on the verge of breaking up, even though she was
screwing around with a fella while she was seeking a "serious"
relationship. It was less than a year later that we didn't speak to each other
ever again. Then on the same American dating site, there was this scammer from
She was around my age, fine looking girl. She show me pictures of herself. She
then told me how handsome I was and how she loved me so. We certainly hit it
off immediately. We both correspond with emails for days on end, talk on the
phone. Then one day she wanted to see me in
Tennessee
Discouraged yet undeterrent, I went to this international dating site that was
based in
So I subscribe to this site, put my honest profile up along with a few,
up-to-date pics. And shortly I had a few winks from ladies of eastern Europe
but no offers. So I decided to let them come to me. There was one time this
dame from
infamous annoucment that she was pregnant from her premarital sex with a man
she slept with. Interesting, at the time she gave me her take on the matter;
that the Russian girl in question could not give me the straight face, and how
Russian women couldn't be trusted.
Hypocritical, isn't it?
So I finally cancel my subscription from that American dating site I was with
before and continue on with this international one I've mentioned. Just months
after that experience with the dame from Khaborovsk, I was approached by a
Russian chick from
Then there was my faith, at the time I was in spiritual confusion I've been to
a few Christian denominations while I stayed in
emai so I can adjust the brightness of the photo via a editing software they
have. One of them saw what I was doing. She wanted to know who she is. I told
her that's my girlfriend from
male partners on the side who I don't know about (which bear some truth to
that.) And that a girl and a boy who has similar problems cannot produce
positive chemistry in a relationship that way; In other words, I should stay
the hell away from her. She would also like it if I should stay away from
online dating in general and instead focus on participating in religious,
local, youth get-togethers at the Catholic church, bible meetings and all that.
And find someone who spiritually relate to yours, one who is Catholic that is.
She went on to tell me that maybe God doesn't mean for me to have a wife; in
other words, He wanted me to become a celibate priest like all other Catholic
preists or even a monk (even though I have some sinful, sexual urges I couldn't
control, it's just human nature.) And if I were to find a spouse I need to show
her the positives in her. I need to have my cup overflow with positives, enough
positives in me to "spill over" to a
negative person like her. (with analogies and the whole nine yards in order for
me to figure it out.) I took a back with all of that. Even though there was
SOME truth to what she said to me, I thought she was paranoid in branding
charactures, and stereotypes towards Russian women, let alone the people in
general.
Anyway, this comes just weeks before my girlfriend didn't bother to speak to me
online. After I was confirmed into the Papal church, I decided to move back to
I was a bit heartbroken but I was undererrent once again, so I stay on to that
East-West dating site. Two other females from two former Soviet republics
approach me but they both were in the
Then, there was a girl from Khaborovsk; a different girl this time. And this
time I decided to start off as friends the next time I'm encounted, because I
was having misfortunes otherwise. But she did approach me on the same site I
just mentioned. Apperately, she was thinking the same thing. She send me her
email message, told me who she was and how she wants to make new friends. She
told me her occupation and her age. Hum, I could have sworn that her profile
and the uploaded pics were not hers; I thought this could be another scammer.
She then add her cellphone number and I like "Wow! She really must be a
scrammer!" LOL But I took time to reply to her, acknowledge that the
profile and the pics don't match. It turns out the profile and photographs were
her mother's, and did that because she was having trouble getting her own
profile/pics uploaded, and wanted me to send her my email address so she can
reply with pics of her own. Okay, I figured, so she
past the first smell test. Now let me see if she acturally sent those pics,
which she eventurally did. And she looked pretty indeed, I like it. We then
start correspond with each other through all forms of communication. It
continues to this day and it has been nearly two years since, the longest I
ever have with any woman online.
At the time of our encounters though, I still have some feelings toward
American woman. I though well maybe I should give them another chance. But I
wouldn't go join an ordinary dating site; I figured maybe it has to be
religious. So I went to Catholicmatch.com and subscribe. For once I took my
sponsors' advice (well half of it anyway, I still attached to online dating
sites.) I thought were if these Catholic ladies are as nice on there then they
should be nice anywhere in the country. After all, one out of a few Catholic
articles on the Internet suggest that religious men should stop wasting time
and money finding foreign women abroad and conscetrate on local
"religious" women in the States because they don't describe to the
femenist, secular cultural mindset and besides it's much "cheeper".
Foriegn women are "desperate" to do anything to come here and live a
better life for themselves. It should be "Love not Lust!"
I later realized though how naive and pressumptious that turned out to be. And
it turns out IT was the final straw that broke the camel's back.
On the first day of subscription, no winks, a few nods here and there but no
offers. Then one chick from
joining the New Age movement until 9/11 came about and she had a ephinany, that
religion does play a huge part of one's life. So she went back to "
Whew! What a mouthfull! Now I can see what you mean about high expectations of
a typical American woman.
At first glace, we seemed like a ideal "power couple". Okay, so I
barely made it out of undergradute school but at least I'm highly intelligent.
And I'm in to the Jamaican culture (well 3/4 of it anyway.) And I don't have a
musical instrument to play, I did had a portable organ but it was broken and
have to throw it away. And I'm not into animal rights, cause I think animals
don't have rights; they can't sue their masters or take their human masters to
court. But I haven't kill a single pet in the house. :))
But after a while, things started to go downhill. I told her I was moving to
She was mad at them because they treated her and her mother
like rubbish by giving them a hard time.
She later told me about her brother who left the Catholic faith and become an
"born-again Evangelical". And how he would not submit to the pontiff
and why he wouldn't have their children baptised in the Church. She sounded
quite attimate about it everytime she mentions it, she wouldn't dare marry a
guy who felt the same way about her Church (Though, I happend to agree with
some of what he's saying.) Then she ask where I'm located, I told her
We later met in person, and had dinner at a Middle-Eastern restaurant after
days of postpoments. Just small talk, etc nothing exciting.
Then weeks later, I tried to get a
awhile. Then we patch things up and start talking again.
Then my money was running out. I've spent most of what I have left on a
bartending class in The Loop for a few weeks. When I've failed to get a job
working behind the bar, the landlord demand that I pay the next months rent or
else. He tried to help me out anyway he could but I've failed to meet his
standards. I only had a couple of hundred bucks left, so I decided to give up and
take a bus back to
It was a huge mistake. I came back here in late February of last year with no
job to go back to and viturally no money. I told my Russian friend in
Khaborovsk what happend and she tried to cheer me up a bit. I thought that was
kind of her.
A few months and three failed jobs later, I begin to correspond to Gina and
debate her about her religion and some of its controversal teachings, like the
papist's version of the Assumption of the Mother of God, and how a person who did not
have a stain of Original Sin didn't die and was assumed
bodily into heaven. Remember, their fundemental teaching of Original Sin is
that we inherit "guilt" from Adam's sin against God upon our birth,
thus bringing death upon ourselves. Which was a total mistranslation of
scriptures, and when in fact should be the other way around; that we are born
"mortal" but do not inherit Adam's guilt. So I brought this to her
attention just to get the ball rolling. At first it was quite civil, but then as
it progresses turned victious. She, and her modern Church dismiss the fact that
we inherit "guilt" through Original Sin, at least that's its core
teaching from Augustine himself. Then it progressed to other scwabbles over
other
questionable teachings such as the Immaculate Conception,
The Latin version of the Assumption
of Mary, etc. She was really defensive, as most Roman Catholics are.
She then accuse me of "dissing" her faith and starts throwing red
herrings at me with some 'Ad hominems', and some strawman arguments. I thought
that was a bit childish. That is how one responds to constructive criticisms, I
thought. That did it, she then decided she would cut off communications with me
because what I've said was "repulsive", and "offensive" to
Catholics like her. Nobody should ever criticize their beloved religion.
Remember, I had mixed feelings towards Catholicism prior to conformation. I
even taken a oath that I believe every single doctrine/dogma the Church teach
and if I were to openly criticize even one teaching, I would be blackballed and
ostracized by much of the faithful and prehaps by the clerics too. I didn't
call her bluff because I knew how Catholics would react
to criticism; they would slander you, lash out at you and cut you out of their
lives. Which is what Gina did. It was religious fanaticism at its worst. And
this is not the first time that ever happend to me, on the same Catholicmatch
website a single mother by the name Colleen from
with it just decades ago. I tried to give her biblical explanations as to why,
and how the "santuary" where the iconastas is located is God's
holy ground, ties also with God and Moses. But she was not satisfied with my
answer. So she suggest that I should get explanations from my priest and then
get back with her. I did, and when I told her what he told me, she still was
not convinced. Obviously, she don't want to believe it because she thinks it's
unfair, she was used to everyone desicrate the altar with thier sacreligious
shenanigans. I tried to reason with her but then came the arguments. She starts
throwing red herrings at me, the ad hominems' and the like. And then she cuts
me out of her life. It's some sort of a "pattern". I could see why
her man left her.
You just can't reason with them, even if you try to be nice to them they would
always find something to whine about.
And so I told Gina right before she cut me off, "To hell with Catholicism
and to hell with your pope!" And for that matter, to hell with American
Women. When she cut me off I cut myself off from the Catholic dating site as
well as American women.
Now I'm quite wary to be around them, Winston because of the bitter experience
I had with them over the years. And these so-called religious women in
I continue to talk to my female friend from
I thank God I've found a person who I can relate to and has experience in the
international dating scene like you do. You can give me your take on my
"horror" story, if you like. (though, I think it turned out to be a
positive one in the end. I think you would agree too!)
Take care and talk to you soon!
Jerome
Dear Mr. Wu,
This is James Kwok living in
You are an infinite inspiration to me and I feel tremendous admiration
to the fact that you actually put
your dream into reality!!!
I did not seem to be able to use pay pal to pay for the e-book I am
interested in.
Please tell me where can I use my credit card number directly to pay
for the following books!
Sincerely
James Kwok
1)
Expatriate Lessons and Insights Ebook ? By Ladislav, my
Expat Advisor who is ?The Obi Wan Kenobi of Expatriate Life?. Contains hundreds
of pages of multi-national insights, comparisons, knowledge, lessons, wisdom
and advice on World Living, Dating and Cultural Understanding. It is unrivaled
in scope and depth. Click here to sample Ladislav?s writings in his Blog.
2)
My Travel and Dating Guide To
Mr Winston Wu,
Your story is an inspiration to many. But, how I ask may I buy your eBook? When I click on the link it takes me to PayPal, but how do I know that you have the email address to send me the eBook? Where is the shopping cart?
Basically, I agree with you on your perceptions on
Your eBook, how do I get it?
Robert
Hi Winston,
I stumbled across
your site and really enjoyed what I?ve read so far.? Having moved from
And the women are
friendlier, though I haven?t really enjoyed them fully yet ;)?you find just
talking ? no techniques, or ?speed seduction??
stuff ? works good?? I think maybe
I?ve got it in my head that I have to always have a technique or
something?maybe this applies more for American women?
Anyhow, again cool
site and I?ll check back later?
Hi
Winston,
Thank you for allowing us to see the rest of your photojournals. They are
really inspiring, as in the amazing women, places, and courage you showed in
the Russian territory. If I had been mugged as you were, I really couldn't say
that I would have stayed there or even made future trips back. I probably would
have been on the first plane out of the country, running home to mom lol. I
looked up your friend's book, Kinga Freespirit. It was shocking to learn that
she passed away almost a few years ago. It's a real wake up call to how short a
persons life may be, and really kicks the "travel and see the world"
motivation in gear- before you never get the chance.
I had a Russian girlfriend for two years. I didn't have to go to
I could talk about this for hours but I know you're a busy guy and I don't want
to ramble too much. In the future I plan to definetely purchase some of your
travel DVDs. For the eye candy and also practical advice in how to travel. I've
never left the country before and I have no clue how to travel wisely or
practically. If there are any books that you can recommend, that would be
greatly appreciated.
Also if it's alright for me to ask, I found Alina from Yoshkar Ola really
appealing. She greatly reminds me of my ex. As my ex was from a small town too
and held many talents as well. Would you happen to still be in touch with her?
Maybe still have her email address? With my luck she is probably married to
some lucky guy and has children by now, but it never hurts to ask.
I want to wish you good luck with Diane, you always seem to have your hands
full. Not only with her, but also her family- which is ten times worse in my
opinion. But if you look at the bright side you're gaining valuable experience with
eluding major hassles and creatively solving problems. ;)
Happy Trails,
Hey man, I just want to say I like your site. Only one
problem. All of the pop ups are annoying!! See if you can move them.
I have also lived outside of the
And I really don't think that the election of Obama will change this fact. The
country is too divided. Do you think that
Peace
A.A.
Hey Winston,
I was just sitting here lonely and despressed out of my mind and stumbled upon your essay... you are exactly right about living abroad (in most cases) and I feel like my childhood was similarly awful.. you have a very nice way of writing and it was so easy to relate to your feelings.
Anyhow I just came to the
Anyhow I'm here alone in my house (ok I have bought a
couple parrots to keep me company, but thats just to keep me from jumping off
the roof, it is no substitute for companionship)... and I found your
article, it made me happy to "meet" someone similarly
vexed. At any rate I've lived in many countries too with similar
experiences to yours. I really applaud your website and your effort to
get good men to leave the states ... actually I have no idea why more people
arn't emigrating these days anyway, the
I;d like to offer my guiding services for central aisa (
So if you're interested in extending your tour offerings I
can be a cultural guide. The only thing I'd ask is to be able to help put
the trip together and require std tests for the clients before they go, to be
fair to the women (and easier for the male clients). I can put
together some pretty kick-ass itineraries in those places as I know all the
good hotels/tour companies and safari guides. Anyhow let me know what you
think... I'll be finished with this project in April and head back to
Cheers,
Hi there Winston Wu. I wanted to say. I love your article about the guardedness
of north American Anglo women. It seems like one of the biggest oxy
morons. In order to meet woman you have to go out and make an initiative. Like
being opened and friendly saying hi. However by doing so it makes you look like
the biggest freak, weirdo, asshole, creep, ect. And can even cause all king of
problems even serious problems. You don,t even have to say anything
Inappropriate. Come on to stong say anything weird or do anything
agressive It dosn,t even matter how good you look or how intelligent
and articulate you are. Yet the weirdest thing of all is if your some
totally stupid unintelligent, unarticulate untalented not
even visually unattractive and a total piece of shit. You have
no problems with the Lady's. I was wandering what has caused this phenomenon in
the
Good Morning, Winston Wu!
I hope you are having a great week! I spent time overnight surfing the internet because I was trying to figure out how to escape this materialist country in which I live. I'm tired of working myself to an early grave here in the U.S. of A trying to keep up with the Joneses! I don't want to keep up with the Joneses anymore! A simpler life with a lower cost of living and a better social life are what I am looking for! As I was trying to decide which country to go to, I stumbled across your www.happierabroad.com website and thought it was excellent! I even went on to read the other parts of your site, including your childhood, your transformation,etc. Your childhood sounds a lot like mine, lol.
I'll give you a little background information. Brace yourself, this is kind of long...
I'm the firstborn daughter, and I have four younger
siblings, two brothers and two sisters. I was born in the U.S. of A. but
at the age of five my family moved to
Things went down the drain from there. I liked
school and I liked studying, so that wasn't the problem. In fact, I
studied because I wanted to, and during my elementary years I did well in
school without even trying. What put a damper on things was that my
father wasn't making the money that he was making in
If my math scores were good enough, I might have gotten a scholarship, but that didn't happen. I wanted to go to college, but my parents kept drilling in my head over and over, "It's too expensive! You can't afford college!" So, I continued working from the age of 18 onward. (I landed my first job when I was 15 years old and in high school). I didn't sign up for post-secondary education until I was 20 years old, but during that "gap year" I continued to study things that interested me. What did I study? Well...
When I was eight years old, I became highly interested in
Asian culture because of a social studies unit that we did when I was a
second grader. I was already in
I eventually signed up for classes at a career college and
entertained plans of becoming a multilingual secretary. I spoke English
(and wrote it with near-perfect grammar), was near-fluent in Spanish, and
was studying Japanese on the side (on my own) when I wasn't
studying for my classes. However, people kept knocking me
down. "What are you studying Japanese for? Nobody speaks
Japanese here in the
Ironically, I landed a job at a local day care center where I taught foreign languages to children. I was still in school then, and after I graduated with my business degree in 2005, I moved out of my parents' house and got my own apartment. (That shocked the heck out of my family!) Things got expensive, so I had to take on a second job. In 2006, I moved again to a different apartment in a better neighborhood. Four months after settling into my new apartment, I began hanging out with a young man that I had a crush on at my second job. I thought he was cute and I admired his work ethic, so I invited him over for pizza and a movie. Less than a month later, that young man became my boyfriend. There I was, 26 years old, with my first boyfriend ever! We dated for a year before he broke up with me. We're still friends, and now that I can see things clearly, the timing was probably off. If it's meant to be, we'll be together again, but if not, all I can do is hope for the best for him and get on with my life.
I turned 29 in September. All of a sudden I feel old! I know that I'm not old, that's not until I'm 30, lol! The problem that I'm having is that I'd like to do some things with my life before I get too old. I've been working since I was 15 years old and I have nothing to show for it but a bunch of debt! (Darn student loans!) I don't want to accumulate more material items any more! I want to get out and experience life! I treasure memories now more than I do material things. I've applied for some English-teaching jobs and thanks to my experience working with kids, recruiters want to hire me. I find it ironic that I'm "unwanted" by American employers, yet I'm in demand overseas. Weird.
As you mentioned in your website, we're told by the
media that there's nothing good outside of the
I feel that I am a white/latina/black/asian person rolled into one because of my huge interest in different countries and cultures, and also because of the languages that I speak. I don't fit into a neat, clear-cut mold. I'll give you a breakdown of my upbringing according to certain cutural stereotypes:
Asian-like upbringing:
1. My mother instilled in us the importance of education, but I got more of that message because of my firstborn status, even though I was a female. I had to speak proper English, "ghetto English" wasn't allowed under her roof. I had to make straight A's on my report card, which was easy before I turned 13 years old. When I entered middle school, it became harder to get straight A's because didn't do so well in math. (I moved to a different state at the age of 13 where they taught math differently, so that didn't help!) If I got one B, that was ok, but if I got two or more, or worse, a C, D, or an F, things got ugly! Things got even worse because my grandparents expected me to get good grades too! My city had this "horrible" habit of posting the names of all the kids from the local schools who made the honor roll, and if my name wasn't in the newspaper...
2. No boys! My parents and grandparents (and
aunts and uncles) didn't want me around boys! As a teenager I was dragged
to my grandparents church a lot, and even the church members were telling me,
"Stay away from boys!" Geez! The reason was that I was to
remain a virgin until marriage. As I mentioned earlier, I didn't have a
boyfriend until I was 26 years old, and that was after I moved out and got my
own place! Ironically, that boyfriend was an Asian-American man who was
born in an Asian country, but raised in the
3. My mother was (and still is) overly critical. Nothing I did was ever good enough. That could explained why I worked like an animal during my early twenties, holding down a job and attending classes so that I could graduate and move the heck out!
Latina-like upbringing:
1. I guess I could have put this under,
"Asian-like upbringing", but I put it here because of a
different twist. Based on what I've heard from some of my
Oh, it gets worse! I continued to work as a teenager, but I had to hide my money throughout my bedroom. I had a bank card, but after I woke up one morning at the age of 17 and saw that my purse was wide open with my bank card missing, I had to step up things and find better hiding places. I hid my money in books, because, as they say, "black people don't read," but my family members soon found out where I hid my money.
Wait, there's more! There I was, at work where I taught kids foreign languages, and my mother showed up at my workplace and asked if I had a copy of the tax booklet so that my brothers could finish their tax returns. Why couldn't they just walk to the library like I did and get their own book? So lazy!
Now, here's the killer, and I'm kicking myself for it! My brother wanted a car, and since he didn't make enough, he had to get a cosigner. Guess which overly-reponsible financially stable person they found? Now that he's defaulted on his car payments, guess who has to kill herself working two jobs to pick up the slack without any help from the rest of the family? To add insult to injury, he went and got himself another car!
Black-like upbringing
1. Because I'm a female, I'm expected to be able to dance and sing well. Singing I could do, but dancing? Well...I didn't develop that talent too well, so I focused on singing. I was in the church chorus, school chorus, and I walked around the house singing.
2. Black kids were mean to me because I came to school to learn, not to play around! I took my education seriously and they didn't like that. I was the subject of endless ridicule and cruelty.
3. When I was six years old, I wanted to get married and have kids, however, something in me snapped when I was in middle school. I guess it was the way that I was treated by black boys? Since high school, my mother drilled into my head that I am to be a "strong, independent woman". I went to school, graduated with a business degree, moved into my own apartment, gained financial stability, etc. Sometimes I just want to take off the "strong, independent woman" mask and just be a girly girl, but showing weakness isn't allowed. The year with my boyfriend was great at the beginning. Unfortunately, I became unemployed months later. Finding work took first place and my relationship was put on the back burner. Even though my (then) boyfriend offered to help me out financially, it didn't feel right for me to accept his hard-earned money because I felt it was my problem and I had to deal with it myself. I guess my independent streak put a strain on things, so he thought that I didn't need him. I'd rather have him back, but I guess I ruined things and it's too late now.
4. I have a deeply-rooted general mistrust of people, unfortunately. It takes a lot to crack through my shell, and the only man who was able to get as far as he did with me was my ex-boyfriend. I was treated like crap by black kids as a teenager because of my nerdy status and my socio-economic status, so that's one reason for my lack of trust. The other reason is the financial crap that I had to deal with from the age of nine and upward. At that age, I completely lost faith in my father's ability to provide for the family. My mother had to go out and get a job when I was 13 years old, and she hated the job that she had at the time, so that further added to the household tension. Two years later I entered the workforce, and even then I (reluctantly) used my money to contribute to the family income. It was either that or get evicted and live on the streets, and that was a huge fear of mine at the time. I didn't want to be poor and homeless with my classmates riding by and laughing at me, so I gave in and gave my parents my hard-earned money.
White-like upbringing
1. I had to speak proper English, none of that "ghetto English."
2. Rap music was banned from the household. If we wanted to listen to it, we had to sneak around and listen to it, but I didn't like rap anyway, so that wasn't much of a problem for me.
3. I felt comfortable around white people as a
kid, and for the most part I still do as an adult. Remember, I lived
in
4. I was told to stay out of trouble as a kid. As a result, I'm a 29-year old woman with no criminal history.
Even though your happierabroad.com site was mainly geared toward men, in many ways I agree with what you wrote. American women tend to be stuck-up, cold and standoffish. When I was a girl, I was quite friendly, but as I got older I became more cold and distant. I think the main reason for that was because of the mental, emotional, and financial crap that I had to deal with as a tween and as a teenager. As I mentioned earlier, at a young age I lost faith in my father's ability to provide for the family. (My mother told me that he wouldn't be in the situation that he's in if he had completed his education, but with today's economy going the way that is is, I'm not so sure now.) At the age of 15, I began working and thought, "I can earn my own money! If I save enough, I can have a better life!" Needless to say, I'm very reluctant to give up my financial independence because I've seen how my father and my brothers made unwise choices with their money that affected the female members of the family negatively. The message that I received was, "Men can't provide, so I have to provide for myself!"
In my case, I am the way that I am because I'm still in survival mode. I'm not looking for a rich man with megabucks. If a man is willing to meet me halfway financially, I'd be happy with that. During the happy times that I had with my (then) boyfriend, we didn't spend a lot of money, just time with each other. I valued time with him more than how much he spent on me.
What I'd like to do is get off this American treadmill and go to another country that has a lower cost of living and a better social atmosphere. There, I won't have to worry about working myself into an early grave just to keep my job and survive! I can loosen up and not be as stressed-out, and actually dress and act like a female! If I meet a man, that's a bonus!
Thank you for taking time out to read this long e-mail! Thank you for creating such a great site! I'll definitely come back again!
Have a great week!
Sincerely,
Juanita
p.s. In case you're curious, I'm not white,
Hello
Winston,
I am actually of Indian origin. Both my parents were born and raised
there. My father immigrated to
I have read your loneliness story several times and I can identify with it.
Although the Hindu belief system takes into account that the human spirit must
experience a lot of things good and bad, I am very sorry that you had to go
through that. My story is very similar, except that I had no action
whatsoever, although to be fair I did not try as hard as you did.
I had been looking at the material of Ross Jeffries
and John Alanis and other bogus seduction gurus and it brought to my mind your
debunking articles on various subjects especially the ones on dubious business
practices. Your religion articles also come to mind. The seduction
industry is actually a religion with its own rules and regulations. Many
of the men who frequent those sites are men who could easily do what you have
done and leave the country, and have more success there.
I am reading your book with rapt attention at the moment. I like how you
spoke about people's fake laughs in this country. My former boss was like
that. His laugh was like one who was attempting to laugh or one who did
not know what a laugh was supposed to sound like. Really hilarious.
It is fake people like him who are only interested in money, fast cars, and
materialism who succeed in life in the
I will join your forum soon. I really like visiting your site. A
couple of nights ago I spent the entire night reading your articles. I
wanted to go to sleep but I was compelled to read. You write very well.
Kind Regards,
Hello Winston,
Thank you for sending me the e-book. I downloaded it with no
problems. Your story and mine, based on what I have read about you, are
extremely similar as far as the social and bullying aspects are
concerned. The difference is that while you seem to have dated at least
once or twice in the
When I got to the part where you talk about the shield put up by American women, I
thought about the time when I wanted to buy the seduction materials out
there. It is really funny how this industry has spawned and really grown
in this country started by the same guy who started the fast(speed) seduction
site. It is only in this country, where the women are abnormal that such
cockamamie techniques are needed and bought by the barrel-full. And you
are right, they just don't work anyway.
Thanks for sending me the ebook once again. I really enjoy reading the
articles in your site.
Kind Regards,
Dear Winston,
Just want to say that you're amazing being able to make
"friends" with so many good looking Eastern European girls. But
as for myself I am single, as I have always been, never kissed a girl before,
never had a girlfriend, and even went to my senior prom by myself. I
am a typical 30 year old Taiwanese-American who, due to intense Parental
pressure, spent my entire life "studying" and learning violin, piano,
and martial arts to get into a good college and now medical school. I had
virtually no social life as I spent most of my time in the University library,
public library, or my room of my house reading and studying biology, MCAT, DAT,
GRE, and now medicine "crap." After seeing your site, I decided
to come to
Please Help!
Most Sincerely,
asianpussymagnet
The 30 year old Virgin going to be the 40 year old Virgin and maybe 80 year old Virgin if I continue to be unsucessful. So please help!
Hello, I have read what your
website, I completely agree on whats going on in the
Hi Wumaster. I loved reading about your adventures on the web.
I've already done quite a bit of traveling, mostly
I am thinking about taking on a new project and documenting it on the web. Similar to what you've done, but from a different perspective. I was wondering if there is any way I could talk to you about your experience. Take care,
Jeff
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