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HAPPIER ABROAD  Why You Can Have A Better Life and Love Beyond America

 

 

Approachable Faces of Foreign Women (Visual Proof)

 

"I blamed myself for my lack of success with American women. So, I worked hard for many years to improve myself... and I was still getting rejected by women who had no business being picky!... So then I did some traveling to Hungary, the Czech Republic, and the Philippines, and beautiful young women couldn't keep their hands off of me! Dating is like real estate- the 3 most important factors are location, location, location!"Hero, forum post

 

 

Nowadays, US women project a very strong anti-stranger, unapproachable force field/bubble around them that says, "Don't mess with me.  I'm unapproachable.  I don't talk to strangers.  If I don't know you, you have no business talking to me unless you are lost and need directions. (Unless of course, you are or look like Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt.)" 

 

In the US, the only approachable lot seems to be older men and punk guys.  So if you like approaching those types, I guess you could say people are “approachable” in the US.  But with young women, it’s a totally different universe.  Generally speaking, American women don’t like to talk to strangers, and if you try to meet them, they think you’re a creep.  But since meeting and dating beautiful women is high on my list, I’ve got a problem with that.  Frankly, I don’t appreciate feeling like a creep just cause I like girls.  I prefer the company of women, and I find them more attractive, pleasurable and stimulating.  But in America women are generally closed, paranoid, defensive, stuck up, and cliquish.  So in the US I tend to be limited to male friends and acquaintances. 

 

This "force field" or “bubble” I describe emanates from the attitude, separatist ego and mentality of young American women, and is definitely real.  I can more than attest to it, for I have felt its presence strongly and experienced it thousands of times I've approached and talked to American women.  And in fact, it’s the first thing I notice at the airport whenever I return to the US from abroad.  When I try to meet them, I sense some kind of shield and that I am violating some type of boundary.  When approached, if they find out that you are speaking to them for purposes other than asking directions, they suddenly get defensive, upset, and act as though you’ve violated their boundaries.  Attempting to penetrate their bubble elicits a negative response which causes an energy drain on me that discourages me from trying again.  That’s why most guys in the US don’t have the guts to approach women.  It’s unnatural, creepish, anxiety-provoking, discouraging and usually leads to no real result.

  

For example, try walking in a public place or mall where scores of attractive women hang out at.  When you say hi to them, most don’t even acknowledge your existence.  Those that do will only smile back half-heartedly before moving on to mind their own business.  And if you try to make conversation with them, they get defensive and quickly withdraw away.  (Incidentally, I’ve challenged those who claim that American women are approachable to do this, but they all failed and chickened out.  They were just all talk.)  The ones that work there will give you a professional “Hi how can I help you?” of course, but that’s their job.

 

US women are not comfortable meeting people, and if they have to do so, then they humor them with fake contrived greetings.  They prefer to ignore your existence if they don’t know you and you’re not in their clique.  The only folks who try to deny it are the politically correct, narrow-minded, reality deniers and feminists who hate men.  Anti-social people themselves also notice nothing wrong (since anti-social people consider other anti-social people to be normal). 

 

Besides me, many others have felt it as well.  For instance:

 

“The invisible wall you described does exist. I felt it many times. With me, when I used to go out more, I would usually just be looking for some intelligent conversation. Sex sometime too. I find woman, yes even American woman, to be alot more interesting than American men. But approaching a woman with that "F*** You" look on her face, I 'm sure you know the one I'm talking about, is hard. So I wait for them to approach me. It has happened, just not as much as I like.”

 

And this person put it vehemently:

 

“I recently found your website and agree with everything you have said.  American women are the most spoiled, unfriendly, unapproachable and anti-social women in the world!  I live in the Chicago area and the women here are just like you describe them on your website.  Even some of the fat and ugly girls have the attitude that men owe them something!!  It's hard to meet women when they are unapproachable and give off that vibe that says "don't approach me unless I already know you!"”  

 

This French speaking student lamented his surprise at how unapproachable American females are:

 

http://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=7285

“Hello folks sorry my accent I primarily speak French (24 y guy )... I am a finance student and I have been studying here since 2006. I just want to say hello and join the club and make a short comment concerning the US and its dysfunctional social structure. Since I came here WOW my dating life has dramatically decreased to the point that the confidence that I had at the beginning was shattered. It is almost unbelievable how unapproachable women are here. when you approach a girl here she feels like you are going to rape her. Even if she finds you cute, she feels like you should be the one to go to her because she is so perfect and even if you do that; she plays mind game with you. You call her, she is either very busy ( on weekends ) or she does not answer. I have never experienced this before, and frankly I never thought that a country such USA could be like this. When I look at this, I would just say these women are very insecure and have a lot of mental issues. It would not be very to be involved with in anything. Anyway what are good countries to date in all continents for all races?”

 

And undoubtedly, the US media’s propensity to make people live in fear is a factor too, as this reader explains:

 

“American culture is in reality dictated by the media. If you look at other cultures, let's say Canadian and Dutch, their media doesn't feed fear into the minds of their residents. Americans are deep down scared of too many things. The movie "Bowling for Columbine" was very accurate.”

 

On the other hand, in the rest of the world, women are flattered and sweet when you approach them, whether they are interested or not, whether they are available or not.  For example, women in Russia and Europe definitely do NOT have this anti-stranger, unapproachable force field around them.  From abundant personal experience, I can say for sure that it is absent, as it is in the "normal world".  But you wouldn’t know how girls are in the “normal world” until you’ve left the Puritanical “Matrix” of the US, otherwise you have nothing to compare to. 

 

In many foreign countries, when you approach or chat up girls, they don’t get offended or see it as creepish, but are often flattered and see it as sweet, giggling or blushing in the process (how many American women nowadays blush or giggle?).  It’s a total refreshing contrast.  That’s how “real women” are, and it’s truly feminine.  Thus you feel more confident and relaxed about meeting women, since it’s far more natural to do so.  Basically, a guy is more allowed to be himself abroad, rather than suppress who he is.

 

And it's not because they all want your money either (although there are always a portion of bad apples, scammers, and hustlers that you can run into).  For a list of reasons why, see the chapter entitled “Aren’t foreign women just after your money and a green card?” (http://www.happierabroad.com/ebook/Page74.htm)

 

Getting dates outside the US is also easier and more a part of the flow.  Why do you think in other countries there are not so many guys complaining about not being able to get dates like there are in the US?  Think about it.  That’s another reason why the problem doesn’t lie with me, as critics sometimes charge.  Also, the fact that I don’t have the dating problems abroad that I do in the US, also testifies that the problem was never really with me.

 

In Russia, for example, all you have to do is say “Hi I’m interested to meet you” in Russian and it builds naturally from there.  That’s it.  It’s the only line I ever need.  It has worked for me hundreds of times, literally.  No mind games or tricks are required.  One reader who concurred wrote me:

 

Mojno s vami poznakomitsa? - usually does it! Very direct and simple!!! dont have to "game" chicks in russia, like in America....
When picking up chicks in
America, i tend to be very unnatural and sneeky, which I hate. I love when i can just approach an open minded chick and just tell them "I like you, you seem very interesting, can i get to know you!" thats it!!!”

 

Later on, he reiterated:

 

“Right on Winston. I met this Super from Lithuania in a club the other day. I just said hello and we instantly connected....Did not have to play mind games or tricks...she was also telling me that she got approached by some men, and she noticed how unnatural the men were, meaning they were acting as if they were doing something wrong, cause she said she is not used to such unnatural behavior....
 
zdravstvuite, mojno s vami poznakomitsa! is all you need!!.... cause thats how simple life should be, a man wants to meet a woman, and there is NOTHING wrong about it...
 
:)”

 

My pickup line in Russian though, is “Moznah vstretumsen?” for “Can we meet?”

 

In Russia, approaching and hitting on women is so normal that I am have even hit on Russian policewomen, believe it or not.  On several occasions, including in Latvia (Eastern Europe), I made them blush and giggle as I sweet talked and complimented them.  Here is one of them below.  She walked around with me and gave me her number too.  Imagine trying that in the US!



 

 

But with American women, you have to play games, be indirect, and often not even that works.  For example, see this example of how complicated dating advice is in America.  (Who wants to deal with this?)


http://www.digihitch.com/ftopicp-31831.html#31831

 

“Seeker, Tips:
* A non-straight answer means the girl isn't interested.
* Don't listen to your friends: NEVER tell a girl you want to get involved with "I like you" "I'm interested in you" or anything like that. That's for -after- the relationship is established. If you say this before she likes you, she will get the "ICK" factor, and you have LOST your chances with her. If she -already- likes you, these may work, but then again, she'll get involved with you no matter what you say if she already likes you. Along the same line is "Would you like to go out with me sometime?" NEVER ask this, or make reference to "going out with you" under any circumstances!
* Be VERY skeptical of advice that women give you about what women want. They mean well, they even believe what they say. But they are wrong. Following a woman's advice when you are pursuing another women WILL make you lose your chance. Try an experiment. Ask for love advice from one of your female friends about "another female friend you like." Use that love advice on the same friend. See how quickly both chances of love AND friendship vanish into thin air!”

 

This forum poster put the dysfunctional crazy dating scene in America very well:

 

http://brown.dailyjolt.com/forum/read.html?id=531250&PHPSESSID=4f69c4a88e49c6294892aa0fc84ee6ca

 

“That's because American girls are really psychologically fucked in the head.

 

If you approach an American girl and are nice to her, you are a "stalker" or a "loser." In addition, Asian guys can't get white girls because they're viewed as subhuman by most white girls. Asian girls drool over white guys. What is an Asian guy to do?

 

As a general rule, for an American girl, if you treat her like shit, demean and ignore her, she loves it and can't get enough. She will become totally self-destructively obsessed with pleasing you and will eventually lose herself in the drama that you have to create for her to actually be interested in you. This is unhealthy, but it's the only way to really get laid here.

 

In other countries the more intuitive phenomenon of "If I am nice to you, you will be nice to me" actually applies. So you don't have to go against your morals in order to hook up with a girl or keep a girlfriend.

 

My two cents!”

 

Even good looking attractive guys have the same complaint, as this one admitted (I know he’s good looking cause I’ve seen his picture by the way):

 

“Thanks, but I have many of the same complaints as you do, seriously. You have to play games with girls in the states and they are spoiled and bratty and controlling and manipulative and have double-standards...they are mostly bitches in a word.”

 

As one reader observed, why bother with all that when in Europe you can just be upfront and yourself to get the results you want? Isn’t that much more smooth, genuine, honest and natural?

 

……. I agree with you that it is a shame that a guy has to go to all that trouble exploiting the intricacies of social dynamics to get an attractive girl's attention and interest.  From what I've read, European girls seem to have less hang-ups than American girls, and don't need to be approached indirectly.  I would love to skip all that and get to building attraction rather than breaking her "forcefield" or what I like to call "bitch-shield".  The saying, "Work smarter, not harder comes to mind".  Why work so much harder to achieve the same result, when you can have a much easier and enjoyable time with women in Europe?”

 

This reader below cites the easibility and fluidity of meeting women in France compared to Silicon Valley

 

“I flew to France after quitting a job in Silicon Valley...(where the women are absolutely terrible!)

 

I go to a French language school and take a class....I make 20 new friends overnight....I meet my future wife...I get married and now 2yrs later...im STILL HAPPY!

 

I dont want to bunch all American girls into one big lump....BUT -- the majority of them due to culture or something act really snotty and stupid - like were not GOOD ENOUGH for them....and to be honest and not toot my horn - i was voted Prom King in highschool...so Id hope to think that Im not THAT ugly at least...but i swear i went 12yrs in the bay area - and rarely found a girl who even batted an eye....and quite frankly i started to lower my own standards lower and lower....and for what?  The moment i traveled anywhere else - i found girls that would SINK any  american girl that ignored me...now i have a wife that turns heads left and right - but she is staring right into my eyes with love.

 

Real love!

 

I think America has a cultural problem internally that is eating it alive...”

 

Some hear about such things from their friends: (though you won’t hear about it in any public media outside the internet)

 

http://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=3991

 

“Dating in America is very competitive! Just like with Darwins theory, only the strong survive. I have had guys in college who were from countries abroad tell me the women from their countries were far more approachable and friendly than American girls are. These guys said women are just more open to meeting men in public places (grocery stores, book stores, etc.) than American women are. It has to do the culture and attitudes of the people from a particular country as how things shape up socially.”

 

 

Photo Gallery

 

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, so let me show you some real life visual examples from out in the field that typify how girls in non-US environments react to men who are “chatting them up”. (something vilified by American women).  It’s the next best thing to being abroad in person.  These are images of girls I chatted up in public without having any prior acquaintance.  Some are photos and others are digital stills from my video footage.  Notice the attitude on their faces.  There is a natural openness and relaxful look of approachability without any fear, paranoia or uptightness.  As you can see, meeting girls that you don’t know for the first time in many foreign environments is very natural and part of the flow, not creepish, out on a limb and against the flow like in the US.  The eyes are the window to the soul, so notice the attitude in their eyes.

 

First, some images from Russia/Europe.

 

 

 

 

As you saw in those images from their eyes, gaze, and expression, they have a relaxed, enthusiastic, curious look about them, even though I’m a total stranger.  And there is an openness to them that is very rare in the modern US.

 

Did you notice how unspoiled and modest they look in their gaze, not just toward me, but in their general aura?  They had no pretentious ego shell like US girls have, but were sweet, relaxed, natural, modest, down-to-earth and without the “men are creeps” attitude instilled in them! 

 

Note: Many of my encounters with the girls above can be seen on video in my Foreign Female Encounters video series at http://www.happierabroad.com/film.php

 

Now for examples from Asia.  Here are some girls I met in the Philippines.  Notice the similar relaxed genuine non-jaded attitude of openness, cheerfulness, approachability and non-paranoia.

 

 

 

You see how unlike in the US, they do not have a paranoid look of fear or defensiveness toward strangers? Take a close look again at the images above, and see if you can spot any anti-male attitude or stranger-paranoia in these girls.  Instead, you see a refreshing genuine attitude in them that is relaxed and ease. The difference is like night and day. And these examples are by no means exceptions either, but in fact are very typical. 

 

For many more examples, see my Foreign Female Encounters Videos, which are the closest thing to firsthand: http://www.happierabroad.com/film.php

  

Now, contrast that with these photos of typical young American girls.  Notice how superficial their smile, eyes and facial expressions are.  There is more of an artificial-ness to them compared to the foreign girls above.

 

 

 

Below, notice the tough badass looks on the hot American blonde and brunette that basically says, “We don’t need men and we are too good for everyone”.  Now how feminine is that?  Who needs that?!

 

 

 

 

See the difference?  Even friendly girls in the US give a smile that is more contrived and artificial than their foreign counterparts.  They have nowhere near the sweet feminine genuine expression that the foreign girls in the pictures above have, as you can see. 

 

You might ask why there is such a big difference.  I can only speculate and surmise that the individualistic values of our nation that create a sense of separateness in the self, coupled with the modern feminist culture that overempowers women to lose their femininity and become independent, has caused some type of imbalance that has changed their human nature.  These two factors could very likely produce a strong but false sense of self and ego, an illusion that American women overprotect in unnatural ways, such as by emanating this anti-stranger, unapproachable force field, among other things.

   

When one discovers that the anxiety-provoking force field of unapproachable American women is absent in foreign women and experiences it firsthand, it can have curative effects, as conveyed in this account:

 

http://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=1898

 

“I was very nervous around women, I found it nearly impossible to engage a woman in a conversation. I was convinced that was the reason I couldn't get dates. I was angry at myself for not being able to overcome this, but trying harder only made it worse. I spent a lot of time thinking about it and went to a doctor and was prescribed anti-anxiety medications but they didn't really help.

 

This problem came to an unexpected halt when I traveled to Asia and within a week I learned that I am really only abnormally nervous around American women. When I thought about it, this actually made perfect sense.

 

When I'm in a country like Thailand or the Philippines, I know that I am desirable to the women there (I get reassured of that everyday). So even if I get turned down by a woman, she probably has a good reason to say no, and she will be flattered rather than act like I'm some creep.

 

When I'm overseas, I don't subconsciously feel like I'm doing something wrong by flirting with a woman.

 

What it boils down to, is that foreign women are an entirely different species than western women. If I had been told 2 years ago that my love shyness/social anxiety with women could be solved simply by changing the type of women that I was pursuing, I probably wouldn't have believed it. It's one of those things you have to experience to fully understand.”

 

Such striking differences make me wonder why more people in the US don’t know about them, but as my Expat Advisor explained to me:

 

“Oh, yes, in the US women are sociopathic for the most part. US men (in general) also never travel and they think that women all over the world must be the same. It is called seeing the world through the prism of your culture. Plus many think the US is the world and inside of every ____ (put a nationality there) there is an American waiting to get out.”

 

One factor for the "unapproachable force field" that I feel around American women might be due to an incompatibility between our soul densities, since not every guy agrees that American women are unapproachable (but then again some guys are afraid to admit the truth or are blind to it or too politically correct to acknowledge such things, and plus some guys don’t believe in approaching women anyway).  It could be that our soul energy or consciousness vibrates at a different frequency and so our presence around each other feels awkward and approaching them feels wrong and unnatural.  Conversely, this would also explain why I tend to find women in Europe to be approachable too, as my soul energy and consciousness vibrates at a much more similar frequency to theirs.  After all, I definitely feel that I have a "European soul".  But this is only a factor, because the reality is that out in public in the US, it is socially inappropriate to chat up a girl you don’t know (even though the movies make it look natural and normal, in real life it’s not), and seen as creepish as well.  Thus, to try to do so safely feels “out on a limb”.  And so this isn’t just about me, but a societal thing.  As evidence, if you look around you in a public US environment, you will see that strangers do not talk to each other except for business related interactions, and guys do not go chatting up women they don’t know to try to meet them.  That’s just the reality, which is apparent for anyone to see.  So to try to pin the blame on some deficiency on my part is illogical.  It’s true that not every guy complains about American women being unapproachable, but still, a fact is a fact.

 

If you’re stuck in the US though and can’t go abroad yet, but wish to meet approachable American women, then your best bet is probably to head for the Southern States like Texas.  Women in those regions tend to be the most sociable and open toward strangers in comparison to the rest of the US.  There is also the Southern hospitality thing that plays a role. 

 

But in the meantime, I hope my visual proof of approachable faces gallery above has inspired you and awakened you to the refreshing difference of the dating world beyond America.

 

 

What guys don't understand about the fear of approaching women

 

What many guys, especially the ones involved in the PUA (Pick Up Artist) movement, don't understand about the fear of approaching women is that the reason they are afraid is not because they lack guts. It's because they can sense that the girls they want to meet do NOT want to be approached, so that to do so would be rude and violating. They subconsciously sense the "do not approach me" shield around them.

 

You see, everyone has body language and vibes. We can all sense them, even if we deny that vibes exist as a form of energy. There is a big difference between a girl who is approachable vs. one who is not. But this difference can only be described in words to a certain point. It is mostly felt and sensed by one's natural instincts. You simply "just know", even without observative physical signs or evidence. Even left-brained guys who deny that vibes and auras exist as a form of actual energy can instinctually sense others' vibes, despite their denial.

 

To try to put into words, an approachable girl looks at ease, relaxed, open and friendly. It's in her face, body language and aura too. She makes eye contact with others, smiles back at people, and has an open body posture. An unapproachable girl, on the other hand, has a closed narrow vibe and look on her face. She is uptight, serious, focused, does not make eye contact with others, and has a "don't bother me" look on her face. When you try to muster the courage to talk to her, you will feel a cold chill and an alarm will go off in you that says, "DO NOT! NOT ALLOWED! INAPPROPRIATE!" It has nothing to do with guts or bravery at all. And even the top PUA gurus can do nothing about it, despite their bogus claims. Guaranteed.

 

An adept "people reader" can spot these differences consciously, while others merely feel them subconsciously. Either way, one simply knows, even in the absence of physical signs.

 

So for example, say I'm in the Philippines where there is a very open culture. There, many girls are approachable and easy to chat with, without being introduced by a mutual friend. I could easily meet girls in public, flirt with them and get their numbers. It will look very relaxed and natural. To inexperienced others, it may look like I am bold and have guts. Yet when I fly to Japan, the opposite will happen. I will sense that the girls are unapproachable and are NOT comfortable talking to strangers, even of their own race.

 

Now this is not my imagination. In Japanese culture, people do not talk to strangers unless they are properly introduced by mutual friends, or it is for business-related purposes. It has nothing to do with you or whether they like you. It is merely a basic part of their culture. Almost everyone conforms to it. You can feel it in their "collective vibes" even. If you try, you will sense an inner alarm that says "NOT ALLOWED! FORBIDDEN! TOTALLY INAPPROPRIATE!" It would feel like you were about to commit a cardinal sin and violation. You just know this.

 

In this scenario, it won't matter if you are the biggest daredevil in the world, or one of the top PUA gurus (e.g. David DeAngelo, Ross Jeffries, Mystery, etc.). It won't make a difference. Despite their bogus claims, if put to the test in this situation, the PUA gurus will undoubtedly fail. I can guarantee that.

 

If something is inappropriate, you just know it. You don't have to be told or given physical signs. And it's not your imagination either. You simply know, even if you are not good at reading others.

 

What this means is that American guys are not really gutless, as the PUA movement claims. Not at all. They simply live in a culture where females are paranoid, not approachable, and don't like talking to strangers. To violate this is inappropriate, so most guys do not dare try.

 

Yet American pop culture maintains this myth that girls are very open and friendly in America, so that anyone who has trouble meeting or dating girls must have a problem - they are either too shy, nerdy, lack social skills or technique. So these guys who are afraid to approach  girls, falsely assume, based on this myth, that they must be lacking guts or "technique" when in reality it isn't that at all. The girls they like simply don't want to be approached or do not find the guys to be their type, so they put out that vibe to them. The unwanted guy then senses this "reject shield" and misinteprets it as coming from their own fears.

 

This misconception is then capitalized on by the PUA movement and their gurus, who have a vested financial interest in selling expensive seminars and courses to these "average frustrated chumps (AFC's)" as they put it, to help them overcome their fears, which further perpetuates this myth. But it ends up being just a bunch of pep talk with little or no result.

 

In reality, it is extremely rare to change the mind of a girl who doesn't want to meet you by using some kind of "PUA technique", and even in such cases, the girl is likely to be mentally unstable or erratic.

 

Anyone can make bogus claims or brag. But to prove them is another matter. And bogus claims usually fail when put to the test. I've seen it time and time again. A lot of guys who claim they can pick up girls in places where they are not approachable, end up chickening out or making excuses when put to the actual test. Even if it were possible, it would happen occasionally, not on an everyday anytime basis.

 

Of course, your looks matter. Some girls only want to be approached by guys that are "their type". These girls are "conditionally approachable" and you can also recognize them by their "don't approach me unless you're hot" vibe as well.

 

Now, suppose you are a very good looking white guy in Japan. In that case, yes a certain percentage of girls will be open to cold approaches from you. But we are talking a minority percentage here, not the majority. Most girls will still not be willing to be approached by you in public, even if they think you are very attractive. They are simply way too uncomfortable with it. Also, most Japanese girls will not date seriously outside their race, even if they have a curiosity toward white guys. You can find a girlfriend of course, or date several girls at once, from the percentage of girls who will be open to you. But you still would not be able to chat up any girl you want anywhere you want. No way. Not in Japan. And whether the girls interested in you will be the same ones you are interested in, is another matter.

 

So the lesson here is that approachability of women depends on the situation, location, culture and type of woman. It's not about guts or technique. You simply have to utilize those factors to your best advantage.

 

Now if you are in a culture where it is not appropriate to approach girls coldly, you can still meet them through introductions, parties or other social events. Those would be the socially acceptable venues in that case. But at that point, you would have to evaluate your desirability and eligibility to the females there. You’d have to gauge whether you are seen by a reasonable percentage of females there as the type they would be willing to date.

 

Here is why this matters:

 

Take the example of a typical Asian male in America who is not seen as “dating material” by over 99 percent of white females there. In that case, it wouldn’t matter whether this average Asian male goes out and meets many white girls at social events, parties, swing dance lessons, cooking classes, through mutual friends, etc. for he is simply NOT their type. Even most unattractive white females will reject him. The best he could do is engage them in polite casual chit chat. But that would be the limit. Any attempt at a date or hint of it, and they would blow him off immediately. In such a case, he is in a ZERO SUM game, for his attempt of using socially acceptable venues to meet women will simply be an exercise in futility (unless a miracle happens). Therefore, if you are not seen as a potential suitor by the females you are attracted to, it will not help you to have opportunities to meet them – whether through introductions, social events or cold approaches – for they simply will not be interested in you in that way.

 

Now in the earlier scenario of the good looking white guy in Japan, the results would be different. In his case, since a certain percentage of Japanese females will undoubtedly be interested in him, all he has to do is meet them through socially acceptable channels - at social events, parties or through introductions - and statistically he is eventually guaranteed to find some Japanese females who will be interested in him. Thus he would have a valid chance of getting results through these venues.

 

So you see, your desirability and eligibility is another important consideration you would have to factor in.

 

This will matter even if you are in a culture where the women are very approachable. For example, if the typical Asian male above goes to Russia, where the females are VERY approachable and have no hang ups about talking to strangers or being “hit on” by guys (which is socially acceptable in Russian culture) the same factor will apply. If he goes to Moscow, in Western Russia, where the Russian women are very racist toward Asian men and see them as sexually undesirable, he may be able to meet hundreds of girls easily by approaching them randomly in public. But they will usually end up using him for culture/language exchange and getting free dinners off him, or worse, milking him for cash and gifts. They will not take him seriously and will not be intimate with him beyond a certain point (if you know what I mean). However, if he were to go to Siberia or any part of Eastern Russia, where the Russian women are more pro-Asian (being closer to Asia geographically), his chances would be upped considerably. His race would not go against him, and far more females would take him seriously as a potential mate.

 

So, even in a super approachable culture like Russia, his desirability factor will ultimately determine his success.

 

There are always exceptions of course, but that’s how it generally is.

 

In any case, it doesn't hurt to try to develop your people reading skills, so you can size up people and situations quickly and accurately. If you are strongly left brained or practical, focus on utilizing the skills of your right brain so that you can function with whole brain holistic thinking. Being able to connect the dots and understand others requires the abilities of your right brain, not just your left. So don't neglect it.

 

That is my suggestion. Good luck!

 

Discuss this article in this forum thread:  http://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=7033

 

 

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